Make Me Whole (39 page)

“I didn’t want to be alone tonight.” Galen closed his eyes with a humorless laugh. “I guess I should’ve taken Suzane up on her offer.”

A strong hand closed on his shoulder, and Galen wanted to sink back and let someone hold him, someone who gave a damn. It would be so easy to let go, just for tonight. He gritted his teeth and hung on a little longer. He’d made that mistake after the fight with Nick. Maybe if he hadn’t been such a coward then and hid, he could’ve found Nick and fixed things before they’d gotten so out of control.

“It would be a lie, wouldn’t it? If I let Lykon out so you could be with him. You two might have a night together, but unless Nick and I work things out you’ll have to wait until another reincarnation is born, and in the morning I’d be right back where I was before.”

“I will not lie, it is a temptation. I miss him. I do not know when I will see him again.” Dexios’s quiet words tugged at Galen’s heart. “To be able to hold him tonight…. It would seem like a blessing.”

“But it would be the wrong decision, wouldn’t it?” Galen twisted around and looked up at Dexios. “It would be taking the easy way out. This is a part of that test that Lykon mentioned.”

Dexios’s eyes were far away and thoughtful, then after several long moments he nodded and crouched next to Galen. “It is strange how fate twists us about. At the beginning, I was the one forced to wait for Lykon, and I didn’t. Instead I sought an easier way and a way to punish him for hurting me, for throwing my love away. And if I had waited, been more patient, we would have been together.”

Galen shifted into a sitting position and wrapped his arms around his knees. “Now I am the one who has to be patient, who has to wait for Nick to realize….”
Realize what?
Not that he loved him… but that what they had was worth the fear and the uncertainty… to be willing to work through the rough times instead of hiding from them. Galen needed to know that Nick would fight for them. That was why he was waiting, because if Nick wasn’t willing to let go of his fears and fight, this wouldn’t last long at all.

“I think you understand.” Dexios squeezed Galen’s shoulder, and this time Lykon didn’t struggle to free himself. It was almost as if he just accepted that touch and reveled in it. “Nick has his own test as well. He has to fight for you, fight through his own sense of betrayal, be willing to see beyond the surface and to look for the truth and then to face up to that truth.”

Galen rubbed his palm against his chest as Dexios’s words echoed his own thoughts. He could sense Lykon’s regret, and it mixed with his own. He still felt as though he only knew half of what was going on. There was something else there. He just knew it. This whole thing had blown up beyond any sense of reason.

“Would you sit with me tonight?” Galen met Dexios’s eyes and gestured toward one of the benches. “I don’t really feel like going back to my couch upstairs and a pizza box.” The thought of being alone again made him so cold inside. He didn’t want to be cold anymore, not after Nick had shown him how things could be different.

“That is an offer I can gladly agree to.” Dexios settled down next to Galen. “I recall you promising me a story about someone called Sleeping Beauty?”

N
ICK
sat in his car across the street and stared at the old-fashioned lamps that were aglow outside the museum. Galen had really gone out of his way to dress the place up. Potted trees were covered in twinkling white lights, colorful baskets of flowers hung from the old iron hooks. The rainbow paneling on the bay doors had a fresh coat of paint on them. Through the glass he could see people milling about in the shop, looking at the items that had been donated for the silent auction.

Now, sitting here only yards away, his courage failed him, just as it had failed so many other times when he’d picked up the phone to call Galen back or almost stopped by the museum to see him. There was nothing he could say or do to make it up to him, to apologize for shutting himself away just as he’d so often accused Galen of doing. He hadn’t wanted to be another painful distraction before Galen’s big day. Or at least, that was the lie he’d told himself yesterday.

History had proven time and time again that they were better at breaking up than staying together. Nick really wanted to prove history wrong. He wanted to go in there and tell Galen he loved him and that he was willing to do whatever it took to prove that to him, even if it meant starting back at the beginning with a date.

Nick adjusted his cuff links and straightened his tie in the rearview mirror. This was a mistake. What right did he have to just show up on this night of all nights? Galen had been looking forward to this opening since before they reconnected. The press was there, along with some of the more prominent players in the town. Galen was counting on donations to expand his place, to find new ways to help the growing community he’d started. The last thing he needed was Nick coming in and making a scene. He should wait until tomorrow when it would be calmer.

That argument was the fear talking, though. He’d let Galen go without a whimper of protest, the way Dexios had let Lykon walk away. Despite Galen’s angry message the day after their fight, Nick had known that Galen probably hadn’t gotten his first plea to come home. He should’ve followed it with another and another instead of remaining silent and pulling back to sulk over his wounds.

The crazy fucking thing was, now that he’d gotten the guts to come this far, now that he was sitting here, he was frozen, so damn afraid of taking that next step, just like he had been with his family. And the terrible twist in this situation was it had been Galen who had shoved him in the right direction with them. It was Galen who had given him the support he needed to make that call to his dad.

Nick could handle Galen’s texts, the e-mails, and the voice mails that he would play over and over. Maybe it was a form of self-torture, he didn’t know. But those he could handle. They were an affirmation that no matter how stupid he was being Galen, for some crazy-assed reason, still gave a damn about him.

What Nick couldn’t handle was Galen being heartbroken. The expression on Galen’s face when Nick had gone off on him outside the restaurant gnawed at him in the middle of the night. And the look of entreaty in his eyes as he sat in the fountain, wet shirt plastered to his chest before Nick prepared to walk away, before Galen had gone so cold, haunted his thoughts during the day.

He’d completely booted Galen out of his life, and Galen would have every reason to tell Nick to go fuck himself.

Nick picked up his cell phone and replayed the last message again. “I really miss you.” There was a pause, as if Galen wanted to say more, then the click of the phone.

He swallowed the lump in his throat and stared at the museum doors. Galen had tried to cover it, but he hadn’t been able to hide the wounded tone to his voice. And every time Nick heard it, his mind flashed back to the fight and Galen’s hurt expression. He had to find a way to make Galen stop hurting, to stop it for them both.

All Nick had to do was go in and scope out the gala. If Galen looked at him like he’d grown three heads and he was the last man that he wanted to see, then Nick would slip quietly back out. There was no need to embarrass them both. In the morning, he could look for Galen in private so they could hash this out.

He loosened his tie as he got out of the car. Damn thing was too tight, choking him. The sound of the car door shutting and the beep of it being locked seemed unnaturally loud in the still night. Light spilled from the doorway out onto the street, and Nick’s heart hammered as he approached. A young woman sat behind the counter in the gallery, and beyond the doorway Nick could hear the hum of conversation, the low, throbbing beat of some drums, and laughter.

“Your invitation?” the woman asked, holding out a slim hand.

“Uhhh.” Nick flushed and cursed himself. He’d forgotten that little detail. Maybe he had one in the car that Galen left behind. He hoped this wasn’t a sign that it was a mistake to come tonight. “There isn’t a list of invitees?” He asked, as he checked his wallet for a spare one and the woman shook her head. “Hold on, let me check my glove box.”

“And just where do you think you’re going, Nicholas
Charisteas?”

Nick winced at the absolute steel in Suzane’s voice and turned around to face her. Her dark hair was short and spiky, and she wore a snazzy purple dress that glinted back all of the light like a scintillating disco ball. “I was going to tear apart the car to look for an invite.”

“Wouldn’t it have been easier to ask for me or Galen?” She gestured impatiently at him. “It’s okay, he’s one of the organizers, though if he’d been any later he’d have been here early for our grand closing. Come on, no sense dragging your feet now that you’re here.”

There was no way that Nick could escape Suzane without a ruckus, and now that he was here he had to at least see Galen. “How is he?” he couldn’t stop himself from asking.

She led him down the hallway, snagged two glasses of champagne off a tray, and handed him one. “Here, you look like you could use one.”

Nick took it with fingers he didn’t trust. The glass was so fragile, and his grip was uncertain. Everything was uncertain. He took a sip as they neared the entrance, and still Suzane hadn’t answered his question. “You were the only one he ever talked about,” she said as they stopped in the archway. “Even back when he was running around town every night, you kept coming up.”

With that little nugget dropped, Suzane abandoned him and disappeared among the throng of people inside the exhibit room. Nick hung back, scanning the room and taking another sip of champagne before he gave into the urge to tug at his tie again. At first his eyes were drawn to Dexios and Lykon, somehow miraculously still together except for the final statue. Nick thought he heard the voice Galen had described.
Make me whole
, it whispered. Only Nick wasn’t sure if it really was Dexios or the urgings of his own heart.

He took a step farther in, faces blurring, conversation nonsensical as he searched. His heart flipped, then twisted as he saw Galen intent on the man before him as they conversed. He stood there, drink in hand, the other hand in his pocket, missing the animation he usually had. Nick knew that look, that stance. Galen was in pain and hiding it by putting on his social mask. It made Nick ache to see it, because he knew he was the one who had robbed him of his joy tonight.

Nick was a fool for considering not coming, because next to Galen was where he belonged, and walking out now would be a regret he’d never forgive himself for. He began slipping through the crowd, making his way toward Galen, nerves fluttering along his skin.
Please don’t let him freak out. Please let this be a good thing for him.

Their eyes met, and the both of them froze. Nick’s heart pounded louder, drowning out the sound of the drums, the conversation around him, as his entire focus centered on Galen. This was the moment when he’d know if they had a chance or if he’d fucked up past any hope of redemption.

Galen’s expression softened, and his eyes lit up as he gestured to Nick. Relief poured through him, and Nick smiled as the room around him came alive again. He stepped up next to Galen and took his hand, lacing their fingers together. They were going to be okay. They had a lot of work ahead of them, but they were going to be okay. “I’m sorry I’m late.”

“I’m glad you came.” Galen turned to the other man.

“Commissioner Pople, I’d like you to meet my partner, Nick Charisteas.”

For a second Nick couldn’t speak. God, nobody could undo him like Galen Kanellis. For someone who liked being helpless, Galen definitely had Nick bound in the palm of his hand. Nick shook the Commissioner’s hand, and they made small talk for a few minutes while he silently willed the man to disappear.

After several long, agonizing moments, the Commissioner excused himself, and Nick set his champagne glass on a proffered tray before he dropped it and drew more attention to them. He was so shaky on the inside that he was surprised he was still standing. “I….” A thousand things flashed through his mind, but only one stumbled out onto his tongue. “I love you.”

Galen’s eyes flashed a warm brown, and he stepped closer, a smile tugging at his lips. “I love you too.”

“Look, I’m—”

Galen shook his head, cutting Nick off. “Hold that thought for later. We can apologize when we’re alone. Right now I think there’s someone you need to see.”

He turned away before Nick could argue and pulled him through the crowd toward the buffet table. There wasn’t anybody here that Nick wanted to see except for Galen, and it occurred to him that it was going to be a very long night of socializing before he’d get the chance to drag him off for a little alone time and a lot of groveling.

Galen was excited about whoever it was, probably a big potential donor, so Nick plastered on his pleasant business smile and went along with the flow. An older man with silvering, brown hair stood at the tables overlooking the selections, and it took a moment for recognition to sink in.

“He’s here!” Galen crowed.

Nick’s dad turned around, and for the second time that night the world seemed to stop spinning. There was a suspicious wetness to his eyes, then he grinned and pulled Nick into a rough hug. “What are you doing here?” Nick asked, hugging him back. He pulled away to stare at his dad in stunned delight. “I thought you were staying home.”

“I realized after our conversation the other night that maybe I pushed being realistic and cautious a little too much with you.” His dad patted Nick’s cheek, then squeezed his shoulder with a broad grin. “So I decided that maybe you could teach me a little about being spontaneous and living for the moment. I want to see you get a little of that back.”

Nick had a long way to go with both Galen and his dad, but for the first time he truly believed that he could show them the same faith that they had given him. He cleared his throat to ease the tightness in it and gestured to the room around them. “Have you had a chance to look around and see what Galen built?”