Master Me (4 page)

“Nothing.”

“I forbade you from pleasuring yourself.”

“And you would be…God?” she snapped angrily. He was badgering her about this and keeping her from a lovely release?

“To you? Close enough. Remember, that’s Master to you.”

A flash fire of fury raged through her, storming away with her tongue and leaving her helpless to stop the words spewing from her. How dare he? How
dare
he? “First of all, you are not my master. Second, you can’t tell me what I can and cannot do. Third, what the fuck, Max? Why are you harassing me about this? What happened tonight…it was a mistake. It was nothing more than a mistake. We shouldn’t have—”

“Give it a chance, Ana. Don’t refuse before you’ve even given it any thought.”

“We can’t do this.”

“Why not?”

Why not? A million reasons. The number one being she was sure she’d get hurt.

Number two, she’d end up hurting him in the process. Her job, his family…the list went on and on.

“Because I can’t.”

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Master Me

He sighed and she heard every ounce of his frustration with her. “So you’re not even going to think about it. You’re going to say no to a wealth of opportunity, a relationship that could change your life, because you’re scared.”

He would pull out the fear card. Low move. Max knew she wouldn’t back down from a blatant dare like that one. Valiantly, she fought her instinctual reaction. He would not goad her into this.

Defiantly, she slid her fingers along her cleft, listening to his breathing. “Mmmm,”

she hummed.

“Ana…”

“It feels so good and I’m thinking of a big strong man, Max. A man who’ll fuck me hard.” She smiled. She wasn’t the only one who couldn’t back away from a dare. She wouldn’t be surprised if he was on his way to his car as he spoke.

She clutched the phone as she plowed two fingers into her needy passage.

“You need to stop,” he growled, she heard distinct rustling as he settled onto his bed. Okay, he wasn’t on his way. “You know I’ll punish you for this.”

A ripple went through her.
Yeah
,
keep talking
.

“No, you won’t. You aren’t my master.”

He released a short burst of laughter. “I have a flogger with your name on it.”

“They personalize those things?”

“All my toys have your name on them. The plugs, the clamps, the whips…”

“You’re trying to worry me.” She chuckled, tipping her head back as delicious ripples worked through her. “Sticks and stones may break my bones but whips and chains don’t scare me.”

“I don’t want you scared. I want you to obey.”

Every word pushed her awareness higher. He wanted her to obey him. Why did she get off on that? Yet her body thrilled at the thought of being at his mercy. She wanted to give him control. She couldn’t. They’d been friends too long. He knew too 27

Brynn Paulin

much about her. And look what had happened when she’d given control to Tyler. She shuddered. What he’d intended was awful. Max wouldn’t expect that of her, would he?

She was sure he wouldn’t. Almost.

He hadn’t shared this part of himself. She couldn’t forget that. If he’d hidden this, what other darkness might he hide?

She wanted to explore it.

Her fingers squeezed the phone. What the hell was wrong with her? Wasn’t it enough to be burned once? She wanted to go jump right into the flames?

She yanked her hand away from her pussy.

“Max—”

A dial tone answered. Shit. She’d hung up on him when she’d squeezed the phone.

Disgusted, she tossed the receiver to the side and pulled a pillow over her head. She should just take her vibrator and move to…to…Timbuktu. Maybe there she could forget the disaster she’d made of her life and escape the phone that was again ringing insistently beside her.

She blindly grabbed it up, clicking it on as she brought it back to her ear beneath the pillow. “Look, Max, I stopped, okay?”

“Who the hell is Max?”

Tyler. Fuck. She tossed away the pillow and dragged her thick comforter around her. Any residual arousal from her encounters with Max shot away, leaving her naked and vulnerable.

“A friend.”

“Have you been with him tonight? Fucking him?”

Almost
.

“It’s not your business,” she retorted. She wouldn’t let him bully her. He wasn’t in charge of her life. She’d been stupid. She knew it. He wasn’t pushing her around.

“You are my business, slave. You belong to me.”

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Master Me

Her chin wobbled as she listened and she started to tremble. She steeled herself against it. She wouldn’t let him take her.

“You signed yourself away to me. You’re mine, don’t you forget it.”

“No, I broke the contract.”

His harsh laugh sent a shudder through her. How unlike Max he was. “A slave can’t break a contract. You gave your rights away to me. Tomorrow we’ll start training that knowledge into you.”

“No,” she whispered.

“Oh yes. Are you scared? You should be.”

Scared? No. Terrified was more like it.

“I want you here at five sharp. Naked under your trench coat and ready.”

“No, Tyler…”

“If you don’t show up, I
will
find you and you
will
be punished.”

Her hands shaking she hung up the phone, her finger trembling so badly she missed the disconnect button on her first attempt. She leapt from the bed and raced to the kitchen and her only corded phone to take it off the hook. It wouldn’t keep Tyler away but at least he wouldn’t be able to harass her all night.

What the hell was she going to do?

She sank into a kitchen chair and dropped her head to the table. In the stark light of hindsight, she recognized the crushed spirit in Tyler’s other two slaves. How foolish she’d been. She’d thought they’d been angry he was taking another slave. They were abused. Mentally and physically. She’d studied enough about the culture of the scene to know there was a vast difference between pain for pleasure and pain that was abuse.

Yet, she’d been so desperate for the right man—the bad boy who’d fill her fantasies—

that she’d blindly committed herself to a devil.

29

Brynn Paulin

Max scowled as he watched Ana talk to one of their coworkers, her back partially turned to him. Purposely turned. When she’d seen him she’d angled herself away from him.

It shouldn’t surprise him. She’d avoided him all day, even canceling the lunch appointment they’d had every Friday for the last ten years. No matter who was in their lives, no matter what was going on, neither of them canceled. The first time he’d been out of town she’d surprised him for virtual lunch. They never missed. Yet today she’d canceled for what? The sniffles? His secretary had taken the call and he’d never gotten a straight answer.

And Ana had blithely managed to avoid him all day. That was his answer. She wasn’t accepting his proposition and, worse, she was ending their friendship.

So she thought…

Max swung around and headed back to his office. Ana had until tomorrow morning to accept. It killed him to wait. He
hated
waiting. But he would. If she didn’t come to him, he’d make a stand. She wouldn’t shut him out.

He knew perfectly well the flimsy lock on her apartment door wouldn’t keep him out—not that her resistance would stretch that far.

He stopped just inside his office, letting the door swing shut as he realized the direction of his thoughts. What was he thinking? He’d stop her from making her own decision? Because he thought she was wrong? Yeah, she was his friend and he was sure she was destroying her life, but did he really know better?

Hell yes
,
I do
. He rolled his eyes as his Dom nature instinctively spoke up. He did understand this life better than she did. After all, he’d been raised in it. The D/s lifestyle was deep-seated in his family. It had been for over a hundred years.

30

Master Me

Whether he knew better or not, he needed to get his thoughts together before he confronted her. He needed to know why her training was so important to him. There was no leaning on the friend crutch… He certainly hadn’t been thinking of friendship last night when he’d gripped his cock and visualized himself surging in and out of her silk-walled cunt.

Shit. He wanted her. What the hell was his problem? It had had bugged him that she’d run around searching for Mr. Right in guy after guy. He’d shrugged off his discomfort as knowing she was barking up the wrong trees. It horrified him that she’d been in Tyler’s clutches. Still, he’d put his feelings down to friendship. Now he’d offered this harebrained idea of training her? He really was a masochist.

He jabbed a hand through his hair, knotting his fingers at his crown as he thought.

He really just wanted her in his bed. Not forever. Just until he got her out of his system.

However long that took. An extended training should cover it.

Punching the call button on his phone, he told his secretary to hold his calls then sat at the drafting table in front of the large window overlooking Lake Michigan. The waves crashing to the shore echoed his peace of mind… He had none.

Pulling out a soft-leaded pencil, he started to sketch on the large piece of paper taped to the slanted surface. Long graceful lines flowed from his pencil as a figure emerged. It wasn’t work, though he did appreciate the concept in its design.

A likeness of Ana quickly formed beneath his strokes. Ana naked and kneeling, her wrists and ankles in cuffs, her face wreathed in ecstasy as she tipped it toward the ceiling.

“Now that’s something I wouldn’t mind seeing.”

Max jumped at his brother’s voice. He glanced at his watch. Great. He’d lost track of time and the meeting they were supposed to start ten minutes ago. Apparently, his brother cared for their subject as much as he did. Actually, Max knew the truth in that.

His brother’s favorite phrase for describing the computer-assisted drawing program was “pain in the ass”.

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Brynn Paulin

“Josh. You’re late,” he said, turning from his drawing to face his younger brother.

Josh didn’t care that he worked in a professional environment. He’d cashed in on nepotism and his talent with computers to forge his way into a position heading the IT

department at Cress, a position that would have been out of his reach at any other employer. While Josh resembled his three older brothers with the same muscular build, strong features, dark brown hair and gray eyes, the similarities stopped there. He shunned office attire, opting instead for jeans, running shoes and untucked shirts. He apparently shunned the barber as well. His hair hung just past his shoulders and he seemed to have a thing for piercings. Six that Max knew of.

Max forced back a shudder at the places he knew needles had gone. Aside from the piercings, he saw himself in Josh—ten years ago. Unfortunately, his baby brother was only two years younger, not ten.

“Somehow, I don’t think you care that I’m late,” Josh said, examining the drawing.

“I do. I have things to get done.”

“Hmmm. Yes, I see that.” Shaking his head, he slouched into a chair across from Max’s desk. Max took a final look at his rendering, experiencing a tug in his gut when he thought of Ana. Reluctantly, he returned to his desk. He’d wasted too much time this afternoon. It was time to get back to business.

* * * * *

Ana loved lists. They were all over her desk, reminding her of what she needed to complete. None of them said worry about her situation with Tyler or obsess over Max.

Yet it was what she’d done all day. If it wasn’t one, it was the other. Her head hurt from it.

They both wanted her, she didn’t want either. Well, actually she did. She wanted to be with Max. She just couldn’t see her way to it.

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Master Me

She knew she couldn’t surrender to Tyler’s demands. He’d hurt her, physically and spiritually. Max would cherish her—she knew that—but loving and losing him would destroy her soul.

She rested her forehead on her hands, glad her desk was in an out-of-the-way spot where she had few interruptions. It wouldn’t do for anyone to find the supply Nazi at odds with herself.

Okay. Tyler would show up at her place tonight when it became apparent she wasn’t coming to him. She could deal with him, even if she had to call the police. She could ask Max for help—

No, she couldn’t. He’d drawn the line last night. Either she chose him or she didn’t.

Her side seemed awfully lonely and empty right now. That wasn’t a basis for a decision. The tarot card that had come up last night was.

After Tyler had called, when she couldn’t sleep, she’d done a gypsy card reading that had come down the ages through her family. An hour later, the final result had lain before her, a strong suggestion for her path. The Six of Pentacles. She didn’t want to believe it.

The card signified the balance of power, one person giving the other person taking.

It could be her and Tyler. She knew it wasn’t. The person who gave, the person who had power, was benevolent. They gave kindness, knowledge and love. That wasn’t Tyler. It wasn’t her—she didn’t have the knowledge about which she worried. It was Max. There was no question. And she was the receiver. Max would teach. She would learn. He’d give her what she’d sought.

Could she really trust herself to Max like this? She didn’t need Max to help her with Tyler. She just needed him. Period. As he’d claimed, he could teach her and guide her.

He was right. Who better than the man who’d been her friend for so long? The thing was, she didn’t want to accept that. She wasn’t ready for things to change and she’d battled it out inside herself all day. She’d avoided him. He knew her so well. He’d see the questions and desire in her eyes. He’d see her internal fight.

33

Brynn Paulin

She stood, her silky skirt sliding over her bare ass. Thoughts of Max had kept her panties constantly damp all morning. She’d stripped them off at lunch, fed up with the moist cloth stimulating her aroused flesh. Commando wasn’t much better. Every shift of fabric reminded her of Max’s hands sliding over her skin. In a few minutes, if he hadn’t changed his mind, she’d feel him touching her again.