Master Of Paradise (47 page)

Jennifer took to her new life like a duck takes to water. She was much sought after and became something of a social butterfly. She was found on a different man's arm almost every night of the week.

Amanda was slower to adjust to her new life. She spent long hours with her son, and a lot of the time Philip joined them. Once the sting left the winter and a hint of early spring could be felt in the air, Amanda spent time around Philip's well-stocked stables. She took a great interest in the horses, as did Philip, and it was a strong bond they shared.

Philip promised that once the war was over and the blockade lifted, he would send for her beloved Miss Louise. Amanda was never as optimistic as Philip. She believed that Fate took a strong hand in your life, and often things never worked out as you wished.

Philip knew he wanted Amanda for his wife, but he also knew he must go about it very slowly and subtly. She was like a well-bred, high-strung filly who would shy off if he moved too quickly, or if he said the wrong word. He had to be content with her friendship, and gradually lead her to something deeper. Philip selected a special pony for Nicholas, and he and Amanda spent happy hours trotting him about the grounds that were now carpeted with daffodils.

Amanda loved nothing better than arising early, saddling up at dawn and taking a solitary gallop out into the Weald of Kent. In places, it was still wild country and she imagined it as it had been long ago, filled with wild horses leaving their hoof prints in the deep green sod where man had never yet ventured.

The English spring was invigorating, filled with a shimmering green like nowhere else on earth. Its weather was ever changing, filled with quick drenching showers, followed by brisk winds that blew away the bed-sheet clouds to reveal bright sunshine, then almost immediately the cycle would repeat itself.

The news from America said the South was going to surrender. Jennifer and Amanda had some sharp words over it. "I'm glad I'm not there to see it. I'm shamed to the bones whenever I think of bowing to the North," Jennifer declared.

"I'm in favor of anything that will save lives. There's been far too much bloodshed because the South was too proud to admit it was wrong," Amanda said quietly.

"Wrong? Why I declare, I don't know your meaning. You sound exactly like one of these English!"

"Slavery was wrong, Jennifer, and you mustn't try to defend it. You certainly won't make friends with the English if you do defend it."

"So I'm learning. Why, I can have a man practically eating out of my hand, when all of a sudden the conversation touches on the South, and right out of the blue they start stiffening up and running on about principles and freedoms and constitutions and civil rights until I could scream!"

Chapter Twenty-Four

Young Nicholas was now speaking in full sentences. Amanda smiled as she listened to the clipped accent that had started to creep into his words. They'd been out for a ride and the moment they returned to the stables, Nicholas had spotted one of Philip's hounds and gone chasing after it.

Philip helped Mandy dismount. As his eyes met hers, he could not keep his feelings hidden longer. "Amanda, you'd make me happy if you'd be my wife. You know how I feel about you-- how I've always felt about you."

"Philip... I... don't know what to say."

"Say yes, love. Amanda I know how you felt about Nicholas, I would have been blind not to have seen how deeply you loved him. I'm sure that in time you could come to care for me, if you'd only let yourself feel again. You're whole life is ahead of you. Share it with me?"

She opened her mouth to speak, but he put his finger to her lips. "No, don't answer me yet. Please think about it. If you'll marry me, I promise to make Nicholas my heir, then in a way it will make up for what should have rightfully been his father's."

Tears came to her eyes at Philip's generosity. She did not love him as she had loved Nicholas, nor would she ever, yet she was extremely fond of him. "I promise to think about it Philip. I know you would be a good father and a loving husband."

"That's all I ask." When she smiled at him, he felt his heart melt.

As promised, Amanda did think about it. Philip had asked her to be Lady Peacock, which if anything frightened her a little. She was not ambitious, at least not for herself, but once a woman who had been brought up with luxuries was reduced to abject poverty, it made her long for security.

Amanda had watched her child almost starve, forced to exist on dried peas, while the other half of the world indulged itself with champagne and caviar.

Slowly but surely she began to see that marriage to Philip would benefit her son, and her son was her reason for living. Yet she shrank from the thought of marrying Philip for his money. If she agreed to marry him, she would have to give as well as take, or she would never be able to live with herself.

Amanda delayed her decision as if she were waiting for something. What it was, she couldn't name.
The end of the war perhaps, yet that will change nothing. Perhaps if Jennifer would make plans to marry?
Yet she knew in the back of her mind that Jennifer was waiting for her to reject Philip, so she could snap him up.

Finally, Mandy realized her indecision was cruel for the others. She sought out Philip, still not knowing if she would give him a yeah or nay. She had thought her son was with Mary, his nursemaid, but as she looked down the deer park, she saw him walking beside Philip. They each carried a willow wand that Philip had cut for them, and they were taking turns swiping the long grasses that stood in their path. He heart overflowed with gratitude that he was safe and happy.

She walked across the lawns to meet them. "Nicholas, you little scamp, Mary will be looking everywhere for you. Run along and find her, that's a good boy."

Philip took her hand as they walked along and her eyes followed the small figure of her son with the dark tussled hair, so exactly like his father.

Suddenly, Philip stopped and turned her to face him. He had been reading her thoughts again. "Amanda, stop living in the past-- let me love you."

She searched his face, looking for answers to her dilemma. Finally she said softly, "Philip, I've decided we would make a very nice family, if you still want me to marry you."

He laughed and hugged her to him. "You'll never regret it, Amanda, I swear. We'll have an engagement party; we'll tell the whole world."

"Philip, we'll have a small party if you like, but no formal announcements, please. Let's just quietly let them know we are going to be married."

"Whatever you decide is fine by me," he assured her happily.

As Amanda dressed for the party, she was glad that the warm weather had finally arrived so she could pack away winter's dark, drab velvets. She had a new gown for the occasion in the latest style. Yards and yards of skirts were no longer in fashion and the new pale green gown had a stylish little bustle that did wonders for her slim figure.

She glanced from her bedroom window down onto the lawn where the guests had begun to arrive. She was about to turn to the mirror with hairbrush in hand, when her eye caught sight of a rider far off down the deer park. Mandy's heart caught in her throat as something familiar struck her subconscious about the wide set of the shoulders of the rider who approached in the distance.

Her heart began to hammer wildly.
Oh God, am I dreaming? Are my eyes playing a cruel trick on me?

With a cry, Mandy dropped the brush, rushed down the stairs, and out through the front doors. She picked up her skirts and, blind to everything and everyone, began to run across the lawns to the deer park. Her hair lost all its pins as she ran like the wind, headlong into the path of the rider.

Her eyes were drenched with tears so that his image was blurred, but there was no mistaking the feel of him, or the sound of his rich deep voice. "Sweet, sweet-- you are so young it pierces my heart."

She could only cling to him, trembling. He lifted her up before him on his horse and gently urged the animal forward. Amanda found her voice. "No, no, don't go to the house. I can't bear to share you-- not yet."

They took off into the Weald where they could enjoy a private reunion. Nicholas found a secluded riverbank where the forget-me-nots bloomed in profusion and they let the horse wander at leisure to crop the sweet grass while they knelt to face each other. He kissed away her tears.

"I cannot bear to think of you imprisoned all this time," she cried, the tears welling up again.

"Mandy, there was so much to do, so many sick men to nurse, the time went by quickly."

"You're only saying that to make me feel better. Pamela wrote and told me you died of smallpox. I wanted to die too, so that I could be with you."

Nicholas didn't tell her of his encounter with the woman. He didn't trust himself to utter her name. "Samuel found me at the prison in Illinois. It took him a while, but he finally got a job there. I wanted to send him home with a message for you, but he wouldn't go. He insisted you'd want him to stay by me. It's a good thing he did. When I got sick, he nursed me back to health."

"You took him back to Paradise? Was my father all right and Mammy?"

"Everyone is fine, Mandy. Even Brandon is home safe. One of the wings of Paradise was damaged by fire, but a great storm came up and put it out before it gutted the main house." He smoothed the wild tangles back from her forehead and brushed his lips across her temples. "Lou told me how brave you were when you had my son."

"Oh Nicholas! You haven't seen Nicholas! He's exactly like you." She sprang up and pulled at his hands urgently. "Come quickly while I show him to you."

A great stir had gone up among the invited guests when Philip's bride-to-be had run off into the deer park to meet the rider. Philip realized immediately that it must be Nicholas. He was beside himself with happiness over his brother's return, yet sad over the loss of Amanda, all at the same time.

Philip quietly explained the situation as best he could, and by the time Amanda and Nicholas rode up to the hall, the invited guests were taking their leave.

Amanda's eyes sought out Philip's in a mute plea, and he responded with a look of understanding that told her was happy for her joy. The two brother's embraced, and Jennifer with a look of disbelief, began the barrage of questions and answers that filled in some of the gaps of the past two-and-a-half years.

Amanda took her son by the hand and brought him to his father. "Nicholas, this is your daddy." The little boy stood silently, solemnly, in front of the big man and looked at him for a long time. Finally, he asked, "Did you build my swing?"

Nicholas glanced at Amanda who nodded her head. Nicholas looked at his son. "Yes, I built the swing at Paradise." His eyes filled with tears as he watched his son, and the child asked, "Why are you crying?"

Nicholas grinned down at him. "Because I'm so happy!"

The buffet table laid out with uneaten food for the guests prompted Philip. "Why don't you take some food upstairs with you. I know you'll want to be alone the rest of the evening."

Nicholas nodded his gratitude to his brother and he and Amanda filled two plates and started up the staircase with young Nicky scrambling up before them.

They weren't really hungry for food, they were hungry for news of each other, but young Nicholas soon made inroads of the delicacies piled on the plates.

Amanda laughed. "He has an enormous appetite. He'll soon be as big as you."

They talked non-stop for two hours until darkness fell unheeded. When they looked down at their son, they saw he had fallen asleep while sitting on the floor leaning against his father's knee. Very gently, Amanda picked him up and went to find Mary. She left him with his nursemaid and hurried back to her husband.

Nicholas was half undressed, and suddenly she was shy and covered with blushes. He came to her and took her in his arms. "I can see I shall have to woo you all over again. You are shy as a bride," he whispered. He turned her about, patted her bustle and undid her gown. "Do you realize Amanda Virginia that I've made love to you more often in my dreams than I have in reality? I am about to begin to rectify all that," he said with purpose as he stripped off his breeches and lay back in the big bed.

She felt herself trembling and suddenly took an interest in the food they'd brought upstairs. She nibbled on a piece of cheese and knelt on the bed in her chemise to offer the platter to Nicholas.

"Mmm, looks good. Why were all the people here today?"

She sat back on her heels with round eyes. "I don't want to tell you," she said softly. "But if I don't, someone else will."

As he looked at her, she seemed for all the world like a child about to confess some naughtiness.

"It was... sort of... an engagement party for Philip and I... sort of," she faltered.

"What?" he thundered, throwing back the covers and vaulting from the bed. He towered over her. "You were going to marry Philip?" He was filled with anger, and jealousy, and incredulity. "While I rotted in prison, the only thing that kept me alive was the thought of coming home to you!"