Matt pulled her close, until he was close enough to touch her, put his hands in her glorious hair, and kiss her until he had to come up for air.
“Yes, ride with me, honey. I need you to ride with me.” He forced himself to step back, to let go of his warm, tempting wife.
She scrutinized his face for a few moments before she smiled again. “I’ll be back in five minutes.” Hannah reached up and kissed him hard, then ran for the house.
The wind still kicked up, making her hair and her nightdress billow around her. She had to put her arms out for balance when a strong gust came through. Matt was hit between the eyes with the image of Hannah dressed as she was. She looked like an angel, his angel.
He took off his hat and dropped to his knees, disregarding the horse’s curious stare. His heart swelled with the idea she had been sent to love him, to watch over him, to heal him. Perhaps his mother had whispered in God’s ear to send a woman to do just that.
Matt squeezed his eyes shut and said a prayer of thanks for finding Hannah. He was a simple rancher’s son with too much responsibility to bear, the weight of the world on his shoulders. Matt had been floundering until Hannah came into his life.
She’d given everything to him, including her heart, her blood, and her love. He felt humbled by all of it, sure someone had made a mistake and given him exactly what he needed. Now he had so much, and although he’d lost people he loved, he had gained a partner, a soul mate to stand by his side.
He didn’t realize five minutes had passed until her boots appeared in front of him. Matt glanced up to find her braiding her hair, with a hat tucked under her left arm and a curious look on her lovely face.
“Are you praying?”
He jumped to his feet and took her face in his hands. Before he could stop himself, he told her what was in his heart. “Hannah Graham, I love you.”
Her eyes widened and then a beautiful smile spread across her face. “Matthew Graham, I love you, too.”
Matt whooped, regardless of the sleeping people on the ranch, picked her up and swirled her around until she begged him to stop. She slid slowly down his body. Their ragged breaths mingled and he kissed her softly. Matt knew a moment of pure joy and his heart was healed.
“Let’s ride.”
Hannah nodded and they went back in the barn to saddle Buttermilk.
Hannah could hardly keep the smile off her face. Matt had told her that he loved her.
Loved her!
It was enough to keep her happy for the rest of her life. Their marriage hadn’t been a traditional one by anybody’s standards, but whatever forces had brought them together had done a good job.
She knew he liked early morning rides. Although he probably shouldn’t be on a horse yet, his invitation to accompany him was marvelous. Hannah didn’t have a great seat yet on a horse, but she was getting better. The sway of gentle Buttermilk was even becoming familiar to her.
He led her to the edge of the property, to an enclave of cottonwood trees with a small pond in the center. It was idyllic, a perfect spot to stop and rest.
Matt dismounted and came over to her, holding up his arms. She shook her head. “I’m too heavy for you.”
“That’s not true. I’ll catch you. Trust me, Hannah.” He stared up at her, his beautiful blue-green eyes so full of love, she couldn’t help falling into his arms.
To her surprise, he helped her down without so much as a grunt. Hannah was not a small girl, but he surely made her feel like one. He laid out a blanket from his saddle and they both sat, side by side, watching the water. Hannah hadn’t felt this relaxed for a month. She’d never expected to feel that way with a man, even her dream man. Of course, her dream man was now her husband and only he would fill her nighttime thoughts.
“I come out here by myself a lot. Winston and me, we don’t always like everybody’s noise.” Matt pulled up a blade of grass and twirled it in his fingers. “I kept this spot a secret until now.”
Hannah lay back and put her hands under her head. “Thank you for showing me. I like it. A lot.”
He tickled her nose with the grass. “I like you a lot, too.”
She took his hand and tugged until he lay on his side, looking down at her. “I was worried about us.”
His smile disappeared. “Life ain’t been easy if you’re a Graham. I keep hoping each bad thing will be the last.”
“You haven’t given up on finding Benjy or who killed your parents, and I don’t think you should.” She reached up and touched his cheek. “But I think you need to start the rest of your life.”
“I am. I got the land grant, didn’t I?” He scowled. “And I married you. What else can I do?”
“You think about them every day. You even dream about them.”
His face registered surprise. “I do?”
“Yes, you call for them in your sleep. You even cry sometimes.” She turned to face him. “I don’t think you’ve said good-bye to your parents yet.”
“I don’t know what that means.” He got to his feet and walked a few feet off. His expression was wary and she knew he was pulling away from her. This was the moment that decided how close they would be, how successful their marriage would be.
Hannah rose and walked toward him. “They wouldn’t want you to put your own life aside to fuss about them each and every day. Your parents are proud of you, and you have to be the one to let them go.”
He stared at her, his eyes wide. She didn’t think he would respond and her heart began to sink.
“I can’t.” His voice was barely above a whisper.
She took his hands. “You can and I can help you. Where are they buried?”
His face paled a little. “By that big tree near the corner of the house. Liv thought they’d like to be in the shade but close enough to keep an eye on us.”
“Let’s go then.” She picked up the blanket.
“Go where?”
“To the graves. You need to say good-bye and that’s the best place to do it.” Hannah remembered very clearly standing at her mother’s grave with its crude cross and crying her eyes out. It was a chance for her to say good-bye, one forced on her by Granny. Now it was her turn to do the same for the man she loved.
“I don’t want to.”
“Too bad. You’re going anyway.” She took Buttermilk’s reins and tried to get back in the saddle, unsuccessfully, until Matt’s big hands pushed her rear end up. Looking down at his handsome face, she gave him a sad smile. “Let’s ride, cowboy. We need to bring this one home.”
“I wanted to make love to you here.”
“And you will. But today we need to put the ghosts to rest and get the grieving done.” Hannah was taking her Granny’s advice and holding on with both hands. Matt was hers; now she needed to keep him.
He didn’t say a word but he stood there for a few minutes, staring into the water. She held her breath while her heart did a funny pittypat, until he hopped on Winston and kneed the horse into action. The ride home was somber but Hannah was determined to make this step.
When they got to the tree, she wasn’t surprised to see two bunches of wildflowers on the simple graves. The brothers and sisters obviously took care of them, kept them well swept and let their parents know they loved them and missed them.
Hannah dismounted with less grace than Matt, but on her own this time. She knelt down between the graves. “Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Graham. You don’t know me but I’m Matt’s wife. I’m sorry I didn’t know you, but I feel like I do through your children. Thank you for raising such a bunch of amazing folks. I promise to always love Matt and give him my heart and soul. You can tell God I said thank you for bringing him to me.”
She rose and glanced up at Matt, who still sat in the saddle. “You’re going to have to get down here to make it work.”
“I can’t.” His jaw was tight enough to make his skin twitch.
“You can and you will.” She held up her arms. “I’ll catch you. Trust me.”
The corner of his mouth went up a smidge. “You’re a stubborn woman, Hannah Graham.”
“I’m trying.” She waited, hoping against hope he would do what he needed to.
Matt finally dismounted and took her hand. She didn’t comment on the fact it was shaking or that his palm was clammy. She just walked him over to the graves and knelt next to him.
It took another few minutes and quite a few deep breaths before Matt started talking.
“Ma, Pa, I feel kind of silly doing this. I know you didn’t want to leave us, but the man responsible is in the law’s hands now. I won’t give up on finding Benjy though. I promise.” He let out another loud breath. “I miss you and I hope you can be proud of what I’ve done, what I’ll do, and I sure hope you like Hannah. We’ll name your grandchildren after both of you.” Matt’s voice cracked and she tightened her grip on his hand.
His breathing became ragged and she just held on, waiting. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw tears sliding down his cheeks, so she turned and pulled him into her arms. The dam within him must have finally burst as Matt buried his face in her neck. Safe in her embrace, Matt wept and finally grieved for those he’d lost.
It was after midnight when Hannah went in search of her husband. Once he had let his feelings out, he’d returned to the graves twice already, telling his parents this and that. It was good for him, but he needed rest. And she needed him.
Hannah spotted a light in the barn and walked over. When she walked through the open door, she found Matt hanging up some tack on the nails on the wall. His expression was full of guilt.
“Is it late?”
“Very.” She leaned against the door. “You missed supper.”
“I needed to work.” He pushed back his hat and squeezed his nose. “I didn’t mean to be so late though.”
“It’s all right. You must be hungry.” She wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed her forehead against his chest. “You certainly smell like you’ve been working.”
He chuckled and pulled her close. “I can always count on you to tell me I smell.”
“I’m sorry.” Her voice was muffled against his shirt.
“I know somewhere I can get clean and we can, ah, get close.”
She looked up at him with a grin, her heart already starting to pick up. “The pond?”
“The pond.”
“It’s awful dark out. Won’t it be dangerous?” The last thing they needed was another injury. Both of them were still recovering from the last ones.
“We’ll ride Winston at a nice slow walk. The moon is bright and I know the way like the back of my hand.” He kissed her hard. “Trust me.”
“I do.” She reached out and cupped his cock.
He groaned and hardened within seconds. “I can’t ride with that thing in my trousers.”
“Then it should ride in my trousers.” Hannah couldn’t believe she’d said that, but now that she had, she laughed at her own bawdiness.
“I don’t know if I can make it to the pond either.” Matt took the lantern and turned the wick down until it was just a glimmer of light. “I have a blanket and a clean stall.”
“I’d go anywhere with you, Matt.” Hannah meant every word. She had started out a lonely woman and was now a woman loved by her husband, with a family she could love in return.
He took her hand and led her to the back of the barn, to the stall with all the hay bales stacked in it. Hannah watched as he shut the door behind them and hung the lantern on the hook. Matt’s eyes glowed in the meager light.
“Now what?”
“Now we get naughty.” He reached for her buttons at the same time she reached for his. The rest of their clothes disappeared quickly. Soon they were both naked and their discarded clothing made a nice blanket on the hay.
She sat down on the pile closest to her and found Matt’s cock directly in front of her. Without thinking about what she was doing, Hannah took him in her mouth. He was hot, hard, and salty in her mouth.
“Oh God.” His breathing became irregular. “What are you doing?”
“Making you feel good.” She licked at him as she would a sweet treat, finding her own body warming up quickly by giving him pleasure.
“You’ve got quite a tongue.”
She would have thanked him but her tongue was busy sliding up and down his staff. Hannah had no idea what she was doing but it had felt good when he had licked her so she was just following her instincts. His cock pulsed in her hand, the base of it so thick she couldn’t wrap her fingers completely around it.
A rush of power went through her as she made a grown man tremble at her touch. She tasted him with each pass of her mouth. He tasted of man, of love, and of passion. Hannah could definitely get used to pleasuring him with her mouth. The throbbing began low and deep inside her, as she felt his excitement build. His thighs grew taut and he thrust into her mouth.
“You need to stop, Hannah.” He tugged gently on her hair. “I don’t want to finish before you even start.”
She wanted to continue licking him, but she was also anxious to be joined with him. This would be their first time since he’d told her he loved her. Their joining would be a consummation of that love.