Melt Into You (27 page)

She looked at the empty room, her empty bed, and then went into the bathroom for a glass of water. She tilted one of the pills onto her palm and swallowed it.

Time to get on the train back to numb. Living life in 3-D hurt too much.

TWENTY-SIX

Jace sat at a table in the back of the bar, trying to drown
his thoughts in beer and rock music. He’d planned to go home and do the same in a more comfortable chair. But when he’d walked into the loft, Andre had been packing boxes.

Fucking packing!

Jace had asked what the hell was going on, but Andre had simply shrugged. “Going to stay with my brother for a while. I’ll get the rest of my stuff when I find a new place.”

The few remaining bricks in Jace’s already cracked foundation had seemed to crumble into dust beneath him. Andre was leaving? The two of them hadn’t talked much in the days following Andre’s confession. Jace had been knocked on his ass by the one-two punch of losing Evan and finding out how Andre felt and hadn’t even known where to start. But the last thing he wanted was for Andre to bail. “You don’t have to fucking move out.”

Andre had looked up, his expression flat. “Yeah, man. I do.”

And what had Jace done? Had he insisted Andre sit down and talk with him? Had he told him that the reason he’d been quiet was because he had no fucking idea what to do with the stir of feelings Andre’s admission has caused inside him?

No. He’d turned on his heel and walked out. Like a fucking coward.

And now Jace had lost not one, but both the people who actually meant something to him.

He swigged another gulp of beer and leaned his head against the booth, the pulsing beat of the music like a hammer against his throbbing skull. He should’ve never let himself care. He’d promised himself he wouldn’t open up to anyone again, but maybe he had a deeper masochistic streak than he thought. Because it seemed his whole life he’d done nothing but fuck himself over and let down the people he loved.

“Adding alcoholism to your long list of vices?” a familiar female voice asked.

Jace’s head snapped upward just as Diana slid into the other side of the booth, her cherry-red lips curled into a sneer.

He had no idea why she was there or how she’d tracked him down, but he didn’t care. Now was not the time to have a discussion with her—not when he had more anger and alcohol coursing through him than good sense. “Go away, Di. I’m not in the mood to deal with you.”

“I don’t give a shit what you’re in the mood for,” she said, her expression pinched. “You’re trying to leave me destitute, and I’m not about to sit back and let you.”

“Oh, give me a fucking break. Destitute?” He looked at her diamond earrings and the Rolex circling her wrist. “You haven’t worked in the last five years, and you’re living with a guy who drags in twice what I was making when we were married. I don’t think you’ll be standing in the soup line any time soon.”

“Greg’s money is not mine. He doesn’t believe in marriage, so our accounts are separate. And after all the hell you put me through in our marriage, you owe me this. I was there when you built that store. It’s half mine.”

Jace closed his eyes, counted to five.
I will not yell at a woman in public. I will not grab her by her shoulders and shake her.
“Leave, Diana. I don’t owe you a damn thing. We’ll deal with this through the courts.”

She pulled a manila folder from her purse and set it on the table between them. “You’re not the only one who can hire a private investigator, asshole.”

He glanced down at the folder as she peeled back the cover. On top was the photo of him and Evan on the balcony—the one that had been released to the press.

Red leaked into his vision, blinding him with the flood of rage. He gripped the edge of the table, breathing through all the things he wanted to scream.

“You conniving bitch,” he said, his voice low and dangerous.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Does this make you mad?” she asked coyly. “Now that my ex-husband is trying to take my money, I had to go find funds somewhere else. And his slutty new girlfriend was quite convenient for giving the PI fodder.”

Jace slammed his fist on the table, the noise blending into the loud music. “You call her that one more time and I swear to God . . .”

Diana flipped the photo to the side, cutting off Jace’s threat and revealing another picture beneath. He and Evan at Christmas back when she was still living with his family.

Shit. Diana knew.

Another flip. A black-and-white photo of a teenage Evan standing by a window. Jace frowned. He didn’t recognize the location, but Evan looked the same as when she’d run away, her hair just a little longer. His gaze tracked down the picture and froze. Evan’s waistline was rounded, peeking out of the bottom of her T-shirt.

He went cold all over.

Diana smiled. “Guess my PI is better than yours. Did you know your little girlfriend was investigated for a pornography ring? They have a whole file on her. Apparently, she learned her photography skills in a not-so-traditional way.” She tapped the picture. “And, huh, wonder where that baby ended up?”

Jace barely heard what Diana was saying. The sounds and lights of the bar swirled around him in a haze as things crashed together in his mind. “Why are you doing this?”

She leaned forward on the table, hawk-eyeing him. “The website gave me fifty thousand for that first picture. Imagine what they would give me for these.”

No. No way would he let Evan be exposed like that. She’d lose everything.

He pressed his fingers against his temples. “Tell me what you want.”

She leaned back, the face he once thought of as pretty looking like a twisted nightmare. “Five hundred thousand dollars. You give me that, I give you all the information I have. And I’ll relieve you of alimony.”

He stared at her in disbelief. “
Half a million
? You’re out of your damn mind, woman. I don’t have that kind of money lying around.”

“But your daddy does.”

His stomach turned, the implication of her words crawling through him like a deadly virus.

She didn’t just want money.

She wanted to destroy him. To make him grovel before his father and lose the business he worked so hard to build.

To win.

And with Evan’s reputation on the line, he was going to let her.

TWENTY-SEVEN

Andre crossed his arms and sighed heavily as he leaned
back against the bar. “How much has he had?”

Eddie, the bartender, checked the tab. “Enough. His ex stopped by, and he switched from beer to whiskey after she left. I was going to call a cab, but figured I’d try you first.”

Andre nodded, watching Jace from across the busy dance floor. Jace lifted his glass and swigged from it, his throat working as he downed it. Andre shook his head. Whiskey. Not a good sign. Jace wasn’t a big drinker, so anything besides beer meant he was chasing demons.

Andre swiped a hand across his face. He’d hoped to not have to talk to Jace for a while. To give them both some space. Telling him how he felt had been a world-class mistake, and seeing Jace completely shut down around him afterward had damn near killed him. In one swing, Andre had knocked out his chance for more with Jace and irrevocably wounded a longtime friendship. Wham. Done.

But when Eddie had called him, Andre couldn’t bring himself to turn his back and send Jace home in a cab. So here he was. Like some asshole who didn’t know when to quit.

Andre pushed his way through the throng on the dance floor and slid into the booth. Jace lifted his gaze from his empty glass and winced when he saw it was Andre.

Perfect. He was cringe-worthy now.

Andre cleared his throat. “Look, I get that I’m not who you want to talk to right now, so you don’t have to say anything. But it’s time to get out of here. Eddie’s cutting you off and sending you home.”

“She had a kid,” Jace said, his words slurring together.

Andre frowned. Great. Drunk
and
babbling nonsense. Fun times. “Who? Diana?”

Jace shook his head, a slow move that seemed to take all his effort. “No. She had a kid.
My
kid.”

Andre blew out a breath. “Come on, man. Let’s get out of here. I think the whiskey’s talking.”

Jace shoved the empty glass out of the way. “I’ve fucked up everything. I always do.”

Oh, Lord. This was going nowhere good, fast. Andre climbed out of the booth and hooked an arm under Jace’s. “Enough. Let’s go, amigo. Whatever’s going on, we’ll figure it out in the morning.”

Luckily, Jace didn’t resist. Andre led him to his car, helped him in, and locked the seatbelt around him. Jace didn’t say a word. Just kept a pensive look on his face—like he was trying to do trigonometry equations without a calculator. Andre had no idea what had passed between Jace and Diana, but apparently it had been more than an alimony discussion.

Andre wanted to ask. Wanted to help Jace with whatever was giving him that look. But the gap between them had yawned wide over the past few days. And Andre doubted there would ever be a bridge back to the comfortable relationship they’d had. So he stayed silent and counted the blocks between stoplights.

Twenty minutes later, Andre had Jace back at their loft.
No, Jace’s loft,
Andre reminded himself. This wasn’t going to be his home anymore.

Jace had sobered a bit on the ride home and was able to keep steady on his feet for the most part, but Andre helped him to his room anyway. He told himself it was because he didn’t want Jace falling and cracking his head open. That is wasn’t because he simply enjoyed having his arm around him. God, he was fucking pathetic.

He helped Jace to the edge of the bed and then crouched down to pull off Jace’s shoes.

“Why are you moving out?” Jace asked, his words less slurred but still rolling lazily off his tongue.

Andre looked up to meet Jace’s intent stare. The green of his eyes swirled with so many things, Andre didn’t even attempt to try to pick an emotion.
Drunk. That was the emotion,
he reminded himself. “You know why.”

Jace put a hand on Andre’s shoulder, leaning in with some pressure. Despite the fact that he knew Jace was acting out of his head, the effect of having Jace over him in that position had Andre’s cock stirring to awareness. Freaking perfect.

Silence stretched and Jace’s eyes narrowed as he evaluated Andre. Andre shifted his position a bit, but Jace’s gaze flicked downward, no doubt catching sight of exactly what Andre was trying to hide.

Jace’s brow wrinkled. A beat passed and then awareness dawned. “You’re a switch?”

Fucking hell. Apparently Jace’s instincts didn’t dull with alcohol. “You’re drunk.”

“Possibly. So if you answer me, I probably won’t remember.” He smiled in that disarming way that came so easily to him.

Andre rocked back on his heels, meeting Jace’s stare. “Yes, I’m a switch. With guys. Happy? Now do you need help getting undressed or are you going to sleep in your clothes?”

“I can do it.” Jace peeled off his T-shirt, revealing a view that Andre had seen countless times, but that had never failed to stir something in him. Andre swallowed hard, and Jace stood and unfastened his jeans, surprisingly steady on his feet. “I’m not as wasted as you think I am.”

Andre’s muscles were coiling tighter by the minute, and the air in the loft seemed too thick. If Jace stripped completely, there’d be no way for Andre to tame his hard-on. He needed to get out of here before he made an awkward situation worse. “Good, then I’ll leave you to it. My brother is expecting me back.”

Andre shoved his hands in his pockets and headed toward the door.
Get out, get out, get
out.

“I don’t want you to go, you know,” Jace said, halting Andre in his tracks. “Or move out.”

Andre shook his head, keeping his back to Jace. “It’s for the best. I don’t want to lose our friendship. And if I stay here, that’s what’s going to happen.”

The sound of clothes shifting filled his ears, but Andre didn’t dare turn around. He didn’t need to see if Jace was getting naked. He took another step toward the door, but before he could reach it, breath hit the nape of Andre’s neck. “Yeah, that’s probably exactly what would happen.”

Andre’s blood seemed to still. He turned around to find Jace within inches of him. “What are you doing?”

*  *  *

That was a good fucking question. But with everything
that had happened tonight, Jace was acting on pure instinct. He knew he’d had too much to drink, but the fresh air and the car ride over had cleared his head enough for him to realize that regardless of everything else, he wanted Andre to stay.

No. He wanted Andre period.

And he had no idea what to do with that urge except to give himself over to it. Jace lowered his head and cupped Andre’s neck, meeting the naked emotion in Andre’s eyes. Fear. Sadness. Want for something Andre had already given up on.

Then Jace kissed him.

A cautious kiss, a soft melding of lips that quietly shattered every unspoken boundary between them. Andre’s spine stiffened against Jace’s fingers, the shock evident, but after only a blink of hesitation, Andre sank into it, parting his lips and deepening their connection.

Instead of awkward—the way Jace would’ve expected kissing another man would be—everything about being there with Andre felt comfortable, a natural extension of what was already between them. Sure they’d been sexual together, but this was different. Intimate.

Andre pulled away and stepped back, his jaw clenching. “Don’t. Not like this.”

“You know why I started drinking tonight, Dre?” Jace said, deciding to lay it all on the line. Now or never. He had nothing fucking else to lose tonight. “Because you were moving and I didn’t have the balls to tell you I wanted you to stay. That it confuses the ever-loving shit out of me, but somewhere along the way things have shifted between us.” He stepped closer. “I can’t imagine my life without Evan. But when I saw you packing your bags, I realized even if I had her, something would be missing.
You
would be missing. I need you both.”

Andre closed his eyes and took a breath, as if shoring up his defenses. And for a moment, Jace feared Andre was going to walk out anyway. Just like Evan. But Andre’s shoulders relaxed. “I swear on everything that is holy in this world, if you wake up tomorrow morning and blame all of this on being wasted, I will fucking beat you with my billy club.”

Jace grinned. Tomorrow he would deal with the shit that had descended over his life. Deal with the crushing news he’d discovered. But tonight . . . Tonight he needed to lose himself in something good. “You know, it’s a rare day when I can say I’ve never done this before.”

Andre’s gaze skated down the length of Jace, making Jace acutely aware of exactly how much things had changed between them. The look was assessing, appreciative, ravenous. How long had Andre been hiding such blatant desire?

All the blood in Jace’s body charged southward. Clearly, his cock didn’t care that the person standing before him was male instead of female.

Andre moved closer. “How ’bout tonight I just show you how good of a switch I am?”

Jace lifted a brow.

“I won’t let you rush into this. Things are crazy in your life right now. When you fuck me for the first time, I want you to be damn sure you’re ready for that, and that it’s not because you’re looking for some escape.”

“Dre—”

“That’s my limit for tonight,” he said, his tone leaving no room for argument. “I want you. Fuck, do I want you. But that’s not on the table yet.”

Jace nodded, knowing Andre was right. It wasn’t fair to cross that big of a boundary when his brain had been blended tonight. “So what do you propose we do, sub?”

Andre’s eyes flared with heat and anticipation at the term. “Let me make you feel good.”

Blood pounded through Jace’s veins, pulsing at his temples and moving lower. They were really going to take this leap. No going back. Jace wet his lips, letting his dominant instincts fill the spaces nerves were trying to edge into. He may have never done this before, but he knew how to be in charge. “Are you going to make me take off these jeans myself?”

Andre glanced down the stretch of Jace’s torso to the open button at his waistband, then back up to his face. “You really want this?”

“Questioning me already, sub?” Jace hooked his thumbs in his pockets. “Find out if I want this.”

Andre, never one to back away from a challenge, moved closer and slipped his fingers in Jace’s waistband, finding the zipper and pulling it down. His hand closed around Jace’s already hard cock, the thin cotton of his boxers the only barrier.

Jace’s body tightened beneath the firm grip. Andre had touched him this way before, but somehow the change in dynamic, the intensity vibrating between them, made it feel like it was the first time. He’d always kept Andre at a distance even in the bedroom. Part of that had been because he’d wanted to keep their friendship boundaries in place, but the other part was that he’d always thought Andre to be one hundred percent dominant. Being in the submissive role was never a comfortable place for Jace so starting up something with another dom would’ve been an exercise in frustration.

Andre stroked Jace’s length, and Jace laid a hand on his shoulder to steady himself. “Why didn’t you tell me you were a switch?”

“Because it was easier with you thinking I was only a dominant. I didn’t want there to be any weirdness.”

“Take off your shirt,” Jace ordered.

Andre complied without hesitation, tossing his shirt to the floor. Jace gave him a long hard look and flicked his nipple ring—hard—eliciting a sharp hiss from him. “I should’ve fucking suspected. You’ve got masochist written all over you.”

Andre’s smile was wry, but his pupils had dilated from the spark of pain. “Got a problem with that?”

“No. Kind of makes me want to tie you up and see if you can take it as well as you give it.” The words tumbled out before Jace had a chance to consider them. And the surprise on Andre’s face mirrored the astonishment Jace felt at his own statement. But as he looked at Andre—the quickened breath, the smooth hard muscle, the erection pushing at the fly of his jeans—Jace realized the thought of dominating and fucking Andre no longer felt bizarre at all. It felt . . . enticing and edgy in the best possible way. And he felt honest disappointment that he couldn’t indulge in all of that completely tonight.

He pinned Andre with a stare. “On your knees.”

Andre went to the floor immediately and in perfect form—not one leg at a time but instead he rocked down straight from a stand to a kneel. Someone had trained him well. Jace grabbed Andre’s hair, tilting his face toward him. “It’s not safe for me to beat you tonight. I’m not drunk, but I’m not totally straight either.”

Andre burst out laughing. “You’re definitely right on that last part.”

Jace pushed his tongue into the side of his mouth, fighting not to join in the laughter. “Be careful, smartass, or I may change my mind.”

Andre pressed his lips together, his brown eyes crinkling at the corners. “Sorry, I appreciate your concern for my welfare, s— Wait, what should I call you?”

Because
sir
was hers. They both knew it. Jace doubted either of them would ever be able to have another sub use that term again.

“Call me J.” Jace stepped back and crossed his arms. “Unzip your pants and show me how bad you’re aching to please me.”

Andre smoothly unbuttoned his pants and opened his fly, then took his thick cock in his hand. The tip was already shiny with desire. Jace walked over to his bedside table and grabbed a bottle of lube. He tossed it to Andre, who caught it with ease in his free hand.