Read Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend Online
Authors: Matthew Green
I turn and walk along the edge of the room, feeling the wall to find my way, until I make it to the staircase. I climb the stairs slowly, holding the railing as I do, and then I pass through the door at the top of the stairs into the hallway between the kitchen and the living room. Mrs Patterson is standing in the kitchen. There are Campbell’s soup cans and boxes of Kraft macaroni and cheese on the kitchen table. Mrs Patterson is packing the cans and boxes into a large cardboard box.
Those are two of Max’s favorite foods.
Four other cardboard boxes are stacked on the table. The lids are closed so I cannot see what is inside them. For a second I think these boxes are important, but then I know that they are not. I am looking for clues to save Max, except there are no clues. Max is locked in a secret room in the basement and no one knows that he is here. This is not a mystery. It is just bad.
Mrs Patterson finishes packing the rest of the soup and macaroni and cheese into the box and closes the lid. She adds it to the pile of boxes on the other side of the table. She moves to the sink to wash her hands. She hums as she washes.
When she is done, she walks past me and heads upstairs. I follow. There is nothing else for me to do. I cannot leave the house. Even though the secret room could not hold me, I am trapped inside this house. I do not know where I am or where anything else is. There are no gas stations or police stations or hospitals to visit. Max is here. I cannot leave without Max. I promised him that I would never leave, though I’m starting to think that if I am going to save him, I will have to.
There are cardboard boxes on the floor in Mrs Patterson’s bedroom that were not here earlier today. Mrs Patterson opens her dresser and begins moving clothing from the dresser into the cardboard boxes. She is not moving all the clothes. She is picking and choosing. Now I think that the cardboard boxes might be a clue after all. Packing food into a box isn’t normal, but it is not as strange as packing clothing into a cardboard box.
After she has filled five boxes with clothing and shoes and a bathrobe, she brings the boxes downstairs and adds them to the pile on the table. Then she goes back upstairs and brushes her teeth. She is getting ready for bed, I think, so I leave. She is the bad guy, but I still don’t think it is right to watch her floss between her teeth and wash her face.
I go to the spare room and sit down in a chair to think. I need a plan.
I wish Graham was here.
I hear Max’s voice. He is calling my name. I stand up and run into the hallway. I am confused. His voice is not coming from the basement. It is coming from Mrs Patterson’s bedroom. I turn and run down the hall. I pass through the bedroom door into her room. The sun is peeking through Mrs Patterson’s bedroom window. I look right at it and am blinded for a second. I close my eyes and see orange spots float past my eyes. I can still hear Max calling my name. The sound is coming from this room, but it sounds far away, too, like he is under a blanket or locked in a closet. I open my eyes and see Mrs Patterson. She is sitting up in bed, looking at her telephone. Except it isn’t a telephone. It is bigger than a telephone and chunkier. It has a screen that Mrs Patterson is staring at. Max’s voice is coming from the not-a-phone.
I walk to the other side of the bed and sit down beside Mrs Patterson. I look over her shoulder to see the not-a-phone. Max is on the screen. It is black and white and gray, but I can still see Max. He is sitting up in his bed, too, and he is screaming my name.
He sounds so afraid.
Mrs Patterson and I stand up at the same time, she on one side of the bed and me on the other. She slides on a pair of slippers and leaves the room.
I follow.
She goes straight to the basement. I am right behind her. I can hear Max screaming on the not-a-phone but I can’t hear him screaming through the wall. It’s strange. He’s right behind that wall but I can’t hear a peep, even though I know he is screaming.
Mrs Patterson opens the secret door and steps inside. His screams fill the room.
I stand behind Mrs Patterson. I don’t want Max to see me and say my name. He is screaming my name, but that’s okay. I don’t want Max to see me and say, ‘Budo! You’re back! Where were you? Why were you with Mrs Patterson?’
If he does, then Mrs Patterson will know that I was outside of the secret room, spying on her.
I know this would not happen, because Mrs Patterson does not believe that I am real, but I forget this in the first few seconds that I am back inside the room. It’s easy to forget that people don’t believe you exist.
When I first step inside, I am afraid. Afraid of being caught by Mrs Patterson. Mrs Patterson is a bad person and I do not want her to be mad at me, even if she does not believe in me.
‘Max, it’s all right,’ Mrs Patterson says, moving toward his bed but stopping a few steps short of it, which is smart. Getting too close to Max when he is upset is the thing that most people want to do but should never do. Mrs Patterson is one smart cookie.
She really is the devil in the pale moonlight.
‘Budo!’ Max screams again.
It sounds one hundred times worse in real life. It is the worst thing I have ever heard. I feel like the worst friend in the world. As I step out from behind Mrs Patterson, I wonder how I am ever going to leave Max alone today.
‘I’m here, Max,’ I say.
‘I’m sure he’ll be back,’ Mrs Patterson says, speaking immediately after me and making me think for a second that she can hear me.
‘Budo!’ Max screams again, but this time it’s a happy scream. He sees me.
‘Good morning, Max,’ I say. ‘I’m sorry. I got stuck outside the room.’
‘Stuck?’ Max asks.
‘What’s stuck?’ Mrs Patterson asks.
‘Budo was stuck,’ Max says. ‘Right?’ He is looking at me when he asks this.
‘Yes,’ I say. ‘I can tell you about it when we are alone.’
One of the things that I have learned is that it is too confusing for Max to talk to me and human persons at the same time, so I try to avoid it whenever I can.
‘I’m sure that Budo can get himself unstuck,’ Mrs Patterson says. ‘Nothing to fear.’
‘He’s already unstuck,’ Max says.
‘Oh, good,’ Mrs Patterson says. She sounds like she just took a deep breath after being stuck underwater for a long time. ‘I’m so glad he’s back.’
‘Okay,’ Max says. It sounds like a strange answer, but Max never knows what to say when people tell him how they feel. Most of the time he doesn’t say anything. He just waits for the person to say something different. But
okay
is his safe answer.
‘Can you get yourself dressed?’ Mrs Patterson asks. ‘I haven’t even started your breakfast yet.’
‘Yes,’ Max says.
‘Okay,’ Mrs Patterson says.
She stands by the door again, waiting. I am not sure if she is waiting for Max to say something or trying to think of something else to say. She looks sad either way. Max does not even notice her. He already has an X-wing fighter in his hands. He is pressing the button that makes the wings spread.
Mrs Patterson sighs and then leaves.
When the door clicks shut, Max looks up from his toy. ‘Where were you?’ he asks.
I know that he is angry because he is looking at me when he asks this question, even though there is a
Star Wars
toy in his hand.
‘I left the room last night but I couldn’t get back in.’
‘Why not?’ Max says. His eyes have returned to the spaceship.
‘It’s a door on this side but it’s a wall on the other side,’ I say.
Max says nothing. This means he either understands what I said or stopped caring about my answer. Usually I can tell which, but this time I can’t.
He puts the X-wing fighter down on his pillow and steps out of bed. He walks over to the bathroom and opens the door. He turns and looks at me again.
‘Promise you’ll never leave me alone again,’ he says.
I promise even though I know I will be leaving him shortly.
I think about not telling Max that I am leaving. I think that it will be easier for him if I just sneak out. Then I realize that sneaking out would be easier for me. Not Max.
But I’m worried that Max might get so angry at me that he’ll start unbelieving in me.
I wish I knew what to do.
I thought that Max would be trapped here for ever, and that I would have time to figure things out. Make a plan. But now I’m worried that Max might not be trapped here for ever, and that I am running out of time to help him before the time has even started.
Secretly I was hoping that Max would fall in love with this place and maybe we could stay here for ever. I know that it would be bad not to help Max, but I know that it would be bad to stop existing, too. Lions eat giraffes so they can survive even though the giraffes didn’t do anything to the lions, and nobody thinks that the lions are wrong. Because existing is so important. It’s the most important thing. So I know I should help Max and I want to help Max and I want to make the right decision, but I want to exist, too.
That’s a lot of stuff to think about, and now I am worried that I will not have any more time to think.
Max finished breakfast and he is playing with the PlayStation. He is driving a car around a racetrack. I watch him play because Max likes it when I watch him play his video games. He doesn’t talk to me or ask me any questions. He just needs me to watch.
The door swings open. Mrs Patterson steps inside the room. She is wearing her school clothes and perfume. I can smell her before I can see her.
Not all imaginary friends can smell, but I can.
She smells like old flowers. She is wearing gray pants and a pink shirt and a jacket. She has a
Transformers
lunch-box in her hand.
‘Max,’ she says. ‘I have to go to work.’
She speaks like she is dipping her voice into water to see how cold it is. She is slow and careful.
Max doesn’t answer. It is hard for his mom and dad to get him to answer when he is playing a video game, so I am not sure if he is ignoring Mrs Patterson on purpose.
‘I have your lunch packed in your lunchbox,’ she says. ‘Soup in your thermos and yogurt and an orange. I know it mustn’t be fun eating the same thing every day, but I can’t give you anything that you might choke on when I’m not here.’
She waits for Max to say something but he just keeps steering his electronic car around the TV track.
‘But don’t worry,’ she says. ‘Pretty soon we’ll be together all day. Okay?’
Max is still silent. Still staring at the screen.
‘I’ll miss you today, Max,’ Mrs Patterson says, and it sounds like she is reaching to him with her voice now, like I sometimes do. She is throwing him a rope but I already know that he will not reach for it. He is playing video games. Nothing else matters.
‘I miss you every day, Max,’ she says. ‘And I want you to know that everything that I am doing is for you. Pretty soon things will be much better. Okay?’
Now I want Max to answer. I want him to ask Mrs Patterson what she is talking about. How are things going to change? When are they going to change? What is she planning?
Instead he stares at the screen as his car moves around a track.
‘Goodbye, Max. I’ll see you soon.’
She wants to say I love you. I know it. I can see those three words hanging on her lips. And I believe that she loves Max. Loves him a lot. I feel bad for Mrs Patterson again. She has stolen Max, and even though she says that it is for his own good, I know that she wants to have a little boy again. And the little boy she stole talks only a little bit more than her dead little boy.
Mrs Patterson leaves the room and closes the door behind her. As the door clicks shut, Max looks up. He stares at the door for a moment, and then his eyes return to his game.
I wait by the door, watching Max play his game. I count to one hundred. I open my mouth to speak and then I count to one hundred again.
When I am done counting the second hundred, I finally speak.
‘I am leaving, too, Max,’ I say.
‘What?’ Max says. He looks up from his game.
This is not easy because I have to tell Max something important and make him understand, but I also have no time. I was afraid that if I left the room before Mrs Patterson was walking out the door, she might hear Max scream in her not-a-phone and come back to the room. Maybe stay home from work. I need her to be walking into the garage right now but I have no way of knowing if she is. I am just guessing. But I counted to one hundred twice, so she has had plenty of time to get to the car. Probably too much time. I might already be too late.
‘I am leaving, Max,’ I say. ‘But only for the day. I am going to school with Mrs Patterson so I can check on Mrs Gosk and see if your mom and dad are okay. Then I’ll be back with her after school.’
‘I want to go, too,’ Max says.
I didn’t expect this. I don’t know what to say. I stand with my mouth open until the words come back to me.
‘I know,’ I say. ‘But I can’t get you out of the room. You can’t pass through the door like I can.’
‘I want to go, too!’ Max shouts. ‘I want to see Mrs Gosk and Mommy and Daddy! I want to see Mommy and Daddy!’
Max never calls his mom and dad
Mommy
and
Daddy
. When I hear him say these words I think that I will never be able to leave this room. I will never be able to leave Max again because doing so would be too sad and too mean.
‘I’ll find a way to get you out of this room,’ I say to Max.
I say it to make him happy, but as the words come out of my mouth I realize that I did not need any time to decide what to do. I am not a lion and Max is not a giraffe. I am Budo and Max is my friend and there was only one right thing to do all along. It doesn’t mean that I have to stop existing, but it means that I have to stop thinking only about me existing.
That means I have to leave now.
‘Max, I am going. But I’ll be back. And I’ll make sure you see your mom and dad soon. I promise.’