Memory's Edge: Part One (7 page)

Chapter Twelve

Rescue Me

Gretchen
could see Carl watching her from his living room window. His six-foot-plus build
made it so he had to stoop to see out, but his eyes followed her steadily as
she helped John out of the car and handed him his crutches. She had relished
her argument-free time with Carl Saturday night, but was hardly surprised by
his reaction. There was little doubt in her mind he knew exactly what was
happening, even though she hadn’t dared mention her plans to him.

Ignoring
Carl as best she could, Gretchen helped John hobble toward the house. It had
taken most of the afternoon to get him checked out of the hospital. And they,
of course, couldn’t leave until the nurses had the chance to say their goodbyes
and make sure they had Gretchen’s cell number so they could check in on him. It
was dark outside before they escaped.

John was
exhausted by the time they made it to the door. The short trip had him left him
winded and shaky. They barely made it into the living room without him
collapsing, and Gretchen struggled to settle him on the couch. Leaning back
with a sigh when he was finally seated comfortably, he said, “I didn’t expect
that to be so hard.”

“It’s the
first time you’ve walked more than a few steps mostly on your own in over a
week, and you still have a lot of injuries. Don’t expect so much of yourself,”
Gretchen said.

“Easier
said than done,” John complained.

Handing him
a couple of throw pillows for his foot, she made sure he was comfortable before
standing back up. “I’m going to get the rest of the stuff from the car. Stay
put and rest.”

John nodded
and let his eyes close. Gretchen slipped away quietly, leaving the front door
open a little, so she could get back in easily. She barely made it a few steps
down the drive before she was ambushed.

“Gretchen,
what do you think you’re doing?” he said, grabbing her arm and halting her.

“I’m getting
a few things from my car, if you don’t mind.” Pulling her arm free, Gretchen
stalked to the trunk, letting the lid flip open in Carl’s face.

“That’s not
what I mean and you know it.” He came around and faced her. Gretchen busied
herself getting bags out of the car. She didn’t respond to his badgering. Carl
was a good man and her best friend, but she did not have to explain her
decisions to him.

Gretchen
turned away, but Carl reached for her, pleading this time. She hesitated before
facing him. His big brown eyes were stern, but shining with concern as well.
Gretchen had lost track of how many times she’d turned down more than burgers
and watching a game. That didn’t stop him from thinking he had to protect her
from whatever he saw as a threat.

“Gretchen,
this is not a good idea,” Carl growled. He was pulling out all the stops.
Usually his easy going, big-brother routine was make her give in to whatever
silly demand he was making. Bypassing that, he’d gone straight for knight in
shining armor putting his foot down from the dragon only
he
thought was
about to roast her to death.

Just
because she refused to move beyond friends with Carl didn’t mean she wasn't
attracted to him. Working the oilfield gave him a strong, muscular build to go
with his already rough, but handsome appearance. No one could look at him and
say he wasn’t stunning, including Gretchen. Looks had nothing to do with why
they were only friends.

Her
friendship with Carl was too important to her to risk. As much as she wanted to
give in at times, there were no guarantees it would last. If a relationship
between them ever ended badly, not only would her heart be irreparably broken,
they would still have to be neighbors. Short of one of them moving away, which
neither of them would want to do.

Looking up
at Carl’s fear and frustration, she did her best to resist caving. It wasn’t
coming over last minute for a hockey game or impromptu barbecue with friends
and coworkers. John was worth standing up to him.

“I know
you’re worried, but everything is fine. John is a very nice person, but he has
nowhere else to go. I wouldn’t have taken him in if I thought I was putting
myself in danger.” Gretchen kept her voice calm and confident as she spoke, but
that had no effect on Carl at all.

“Nice
person? You have no idea who this guy is,” he hissed. “He could murder you in
your sleep if he wanted to!”

“Don’t you
think that’s a little overdramatic?”

Carl’s face
hardened. “No. I don’t.”

Did he have
to be so difficult?

“The police
checked his fingerprints. The shrink at the hospital gave him a full
psychological evaluation. He’s fine,” Gretchen said.

“That’s not
enough,” Carl argued.

“Yes, it
is.”

Huffing in
irritation, Carl looked up at the clouds, his ultimate expression of
frustration. He was not going to give up. If Gretchen didn’t do something to
appease him, she had no doubt he would be trying to watch her night and day for
the chance to protect her from John. It was time for Gretchen to pull out all
the stops on him.

Resting her
hand on his forearm immediately drew his gaze to Gretchen’s. An expectant look
pushed Gretchen to speak. “Your number is the first one in my favorites on my
cell phone. If I need help, I know you’ll be there.” She was using his feelings
for her against him, but Gretchen knew it was the only way to make him back
down. “John needs some help right now, and I’m in the position to give it. I
need you to trust me on this.”

Carl opened
his mouth to object and Gretchen was quick to continue. “If I feel in danger in
any way, I promise I will let you rescue me and put me in your debt forever.”

His
righteous frustration faded into a slight smile. No doubt the idea of Gretchen
owing him was very appealing. Amusement faded quickly as he seemed to remember
his earlier concern. “Are you sure about this? It really seems like a bad idea
to me.” His hand slipped around her shoulders and pulled her against his chest.
“You know how much I worry about you,” he said.

“I know,
and I really do appreciate it.” Gretchen honestly meant that. Having Carl next
door always made her feel better. He even played a part in her deciding to let
John move in. Not that she would admit that.

After just
slightly too long, Carl finally released her and stepped back. “I want your promise
that you’ll call me if anything upsets you or makes you feel worried at all.”

His look of
stoic seriousness made her smile. “I promise.”

Carl
actually seemed to relax a little at that.

“I think
you’re really just jealous,” Gretchen said teasingly.

Grinning
from ear to ear, Carl folded his arms across his chest. “Of course I am.”

Rolling her
eyes, Gretchen said, “You’re unbelievable.”

“Unbelievably
handsome, and strong, and—”

“Humble?”
she mocked. He just smiled. “Now, would you please let me get my groceries into
the house before my ice cream melts?”

“Butter
Pecan?” he asked.

“You bet.”

“Are you
sure you don’t need any help with your bags?” Carl asked, eyeing Gretchen’s
front door.

“No,” she
said quickly. The last thing she needed was Carl in the same room as John.

“All right,
then. Call if you need anything.”

“I will,”
Gretchen said, shaking her head.

Watching
Carl walk back to his house, Gretchen realized just how much his presence
reassured her. Both Carl and John were right about her being scared to open her
home to John. She really didn’t know what she was getting herself into.
Gretchen only hoped she wouldn’t need to call in her white knight to rescue her
from her decision.

Carl would
most definitely never let her live it down.  

Chapter Thirteen

Gone

Her gentle
hands woke John in the pink light of dawn. Opening his eyes, he immediately
searched for her face. Gretchen’s soft smile wasn’t hard to find. She was
kneeling next to his bed, watching him anxiously. As John’s mind came back to
life, so did the pain. His throat constricted as it tried to keep a wave of
pain-induced bile from coming up.

“Are you
okay, John?” Gretchen asked. She brought her hand up to his forehead to feel
for the symptoms of fever they had been warned about. Her hand came away
slowly.

“I’m fine,”
John said.

Shaking her
head, Gretchen studied him for a brief second. “I’m going to have to call in
sick. I can’t leave you here like this.”

“Gretchen, I’m
fine, really. I just need my pain meds,” he said. “Could you grab them off the
nightstand for me?”

Her careful
fingers measured out two pills and handed them to him with a glass of water.
She watched as he downed the pills. In an effort to show Gretchen he was fine,
John pushed himself up in bed and leaned against the headboard. That in itself
was a bit of a trick with only one hand able to support his weight, but he did
it with a determined grimace. John had been going for a smile, but it turned
out he was shooting a little high with that one.

“See,” John
said, “I’m fine.”

Raising an
eyebrow at him, Gretchen said, “You’re not fine. I better stay.”

“No. Go to
work. I can handle lying in bed all day just fine. I don’t want to interrupt
your life any more than I already have,” he said. John said it, but at the same
time he dreaded seeing her walk out the door.

“You’re not
interrupting anything. It’s not that big of a deal to call in sick. My boss
will understand,” she argued.

Her boss
would probably give her the day off, but she would also wonder how many more
days Gretchen was going to need to take care of some homeless guy she found in
the middle of the road. It was her first year teaching. Taking tons of sick
time was not going to win her any brownie points with the school district.

“Can you
hand me my crutches?” John asked.

She seemed
to think about her decision before she finally standing and collecting them.
Holding the crutches out for John, she waited. Clearly, she was testing him. If
he couldn’t get up to the crutches, John knew she was going to call in sick.
Very slowly, he slid his casted leg across the mattress and lowered it to the
floor by miniscule increments. As careful as he was, the slight touch of his
foot on the carpet sent pain racing up his leg. John was sure he could feel
exactly where all three breaks were in his leg.

The next
step of the test was pulling himself up to the crutches and actually using
them, which was tricky with one arm in a cast. Luckily, the break in his arm was
the least serious of his broken bones and he could hook his thumb on the crutch
to steady it and swing it forward.

John held
his breath as he reached for the crutches and pulled himself up from the bed.
Instead of moving slowly, he thought it would be better to go for it in a rush.
All he accomplished was making himself lightheaded, which also seemed to
intensify the throbbing in his leg. Gretchen’s strong grip on him kept him from
plopping back down on the bed.

“See, no
problem,” he said with a smile.

Gretchen
didn’t smile back. Her lips parted and John knew she was about to announce she
would stay home, so he swung his crutches and trundled past her. The swinging
motion hurt like hell, but he kept going until he reached the kitchen.

Pretending
Gretchen wasn’t watching him like a hawk, John searched her cupboards for
something to eat. Not finding a whole lot, he finally gave her a chance to
speak.

“Do you
have anything for breakfast?” he asked.

Now there
was the hint of a smile on her lips. “Cinnamon-raisin toast?” she asked.

“Sure.
Where is it?” John hadn’t seen any bread during his quick look through the
cupboards but, with how haphazardly everything was thrown into them, he easily
could have missed it. Going back to the Lazy-Susan cupboard, he pushed it in
and watched the boxes and cans spin past him. The sound of the fridge door
being pulled open caught his attention.

Gretchen
held up a bag of bread with a smug smile.

“You keep
it in the fridge?” he asked.

“It stays
fresh longer that way,” she said. “Sit down and I’ll make you some.”

Well, at
least
she
knew where things were in the kitchen.

“Don’t you
need to be getting to work?” John asked. He was not going to let her distract
him with food. Keeping her there over a simple breakfast sounded much better
than having to face the anxiety of being alone. She had to work, though. Even
if he had to shove her out the door himself, she was going to take her books
and go teach a horde of teenagers about the periodic table, or whatever it was
they needed to know. Being alone was something he had to face. It might as well
be right away.

“I’ve got a
few minutes,” Gretchen said.

That hardly
sounded like anything concrete. Dropping two slices of cinnamon swirled bread
into the toaster, Gretchen turned around to face John. “Do you want butter or
cream cheese on your toast?” she asked.

“What do
you like?” he asked in return. Was she stalling for time?

“I like
butter, but a lot of people like cream cheese, too.”

“How about
one of each then?”

Gretchen
nodded and started for the fridge again, but John was closer and beat her to
it. Pulling the door open, he had to search through random takeout boxes and
Tupperware containers before he found them. As organized as the rest of the
house was, the cupboards and fridge were a disheveled mess. Eventually, he got
both the butter and the cream cheese onto the kitchen counter, then hunted
around in the drawers until he found a butter knife.

When the toast
popped up, John reached over to snatch it out before Gretchen could. He had
them buttered and cream cheesed in record time and took a big bite out of the
one with the butter. Savoring the flavors of each one as he leaned against the
counter, John stored them away for when he could get to his notebook.

Watching
John eat, and watching the clock on the stove with equal interest, Gretchen’s
indecision had her tapping the countertop in anxiety. The clock read
seven-fifteen. John knew she had to be at work by seven-thirty. The school was
only a few minutes away, but he wondered if he had already made her late for
work.

Licking the
last of the cream cheese off his fingers, John grabbed his crutches again and
faced Gretchen. “I’ll be fine, Gretchen. Would you please just go to work?”

“I don’t
know,” she said. “What if you need something? What if you’re in pain or you
need help? I don’t like leaving you here alone.”

“I have
your number at work, plus Lynn’s, plus Maria’s, plus Dr. Sanchez’s, plus all my
med’s. I’m going to sit down on the couch, watch some TV, and probably take a
couple really long naps.” Hobbling over to her, John put his hand on Gretchen’s
shoulder and pushed her toward the front door. “And you are going to work,
right now.”

“John, I
can stay,” she said. “You’re not ready to be left alone.”

Was she
thinking about the last time she had left him alone? Or was she really just
afraid of leaving a stranger in her house? It was probably a little of both for
her, as it was for John. What would John discover about himself when completely
alone?

“No,
Gretchen. I’ll be fine. I need to do this. I have to do it eventually, so you
might as well let me take a stab at it today,” John said. She still didn’t look
convinced. “Please, go to work. You’ve done so much for me already. Will you
please let me do this for you?”

“Are you
sure?” she asked.

Repeating
her own words from the hospital, John said, “I wouldn’t have asked if I
wasn’t.”

Gretchen
smirked at him, but took a hesitant step toward the door as well. Frowning
slightly, she waited a few seconds before taking another step. Then another. It
was slow progress, but she made it to the door eventually.

“Call me if
you need anything, okay?”

“I
promise.”

Then
Gretchen yanked the door open and dashed across the lawn to her car without
looking back. John thought she even had her eyes closed as she backed out of
the driveway. Not the safest thing to do, but it kept her from changing her
mind and running back to the house. Turning out onto the main road, her car
disappeared from view.

John should
have felt some accomplishment, but a strange ticking noise interrupted his
thoughts. Looking down, he saw his hand shaking, tapping against his crutch. It
was as if the panic started in his fingertips and he could visibly see it
travelling up his arms. Fascinated and terrified at the same time, John just
watched as the tremor moved rapidly up to his chest, grabbing his heart and
lungs.

It suddenly
hit him that Gretchen was gone.

He was
alone again.

Even though
he was the one who told her to go, and should have been fine, he wasn’t. The
empty void which had claimed John before was swallowing him again. Suddenly,
holding onto his crutches was too difficult to manage. They clattered to
ground, and he slid down after them.