Mia's Heart (The Paradise Diaries) (12 page)

“Of
course.  Why do you ask?”

“Gavin
told me about you and Reece’s history.  So I just wondered,” I
shrug.  I’m trying to act nonchalant.  I hope it’s coming across that
way.  In an effort to enhance the act, I make a point of examining the
portraits of Giliberti ancestors as we walk past them.  Their eyes seem to
stare into my back.  It’s sort of creepy.

“Why
are you so interested?” Quinn raises an eyebrow.

So,
I fail. 

Epically. 

Apparently
I wasn’t so nonchalant.

“I
don’t know,” I shrug again. “Just curious.  I guess I find everything
interesting nowadays.  Everything seems new.”

Quinn
smiles, a real and sincere smile. It’s salt of the earth.  Whatever that
means. 

“I
guess that’s one benefit to amnesia,” he tells me, as he lightly guides my
elbow around the landing.  “You get to start over.  If you want,” he
adds.

I
look at him.  “Should I?  Start over, I mean.  Was the old me
something I should re-do?”

He
stops. 

And
cocks his head.

And
he is oh-so-sexy.

“No,”
he says firmly. “Old Mia was someone who hated the pressure of worrying about
what everyone thought.  So you hid who you really were.  Maybe the
new you won’t be so concerned with it.”

I
stare at him.

“I
thought you didn’t know me that well,” I point out uncertainly.  He
shrugs.

“It
wasn’t difficult to see,” he answers as we resume the climb on the
stairs.  “Just worry about being who you really are.  If you never
remember who you were, that’s fine.  You’re still you regardless.”

“That’s
very profound,” I murmur. 

And
it is.  I’ve been so preoccupied with trying to remember who I was, that I
forgot that I’m still me either way.  I’m just a me without
memories.  Interesting. It’s so simple that it’s genius.

We
stop in front of my bedroom.

There
is an awkward pause.  But maybe it’s only awkward to me.  Quinn
always seems casual.  Always relaxed. 

He
smiles at me now. 

“I’m
glad you’re here,” he tells me.  “I was getting lonely here all by
myself.”

“Well,
Dante and Reece will be here tomorrow. So, you’ll have even more people to keep
you company,” I remind him.

“True,”
he acknowledges.  “But I’m most happy about you.”

I
startle and stare into his chocolate brown eyes.  “Really?” I
whisper. 

He
nods.  “Really.”

“You
don’t hide what you’re feeling much, do you?” I observe.  Quinn’s eyes
sparkle in response. 

“I
don’t see the point in it,” he admits.  “I don’t like games.  I don’t
like playing them because I hate to lose.”

“So
you’re a sore loser , then?” I ask with a laugh. 

But
he’s shaking his head.  “Nope.  I’m not a sore loser.  Because I
never lose in the first place.”

He
dips his head like an old-fashioned cowboy, like something that belongs in a
razor commercial or a cologne ad.  And then he continues down the hall to
his bedroom and I fight the urge to chase after him.

But
I don’t and so I’m left standing in shock in the hallway alone. 

He
doesn’t lose.

What
is he trying to win?

I
have a feeling that I am going to be the one who loses—hours of sleep
tonight—trying to ponder that question. 

Chapter Eleven

“Mia!”

There
is a squeal, unearthly loud and shrieky, before something lands on my
bed.  I open my eyes but squeeze them instantly closed again.  The
sun is too, too bright.  And the voice is too, too loud. 

And
too, too unfamiliar.

But
the unfamiliar thing is bouncing.

And
ramming its bony elbow into my side.  

So
I open my eyes again and find the girl from my phone. 

“Reece?”

The
blonde girl squeals again and hugs me.  “You remember me!!”

She’s
exuberant and I don’t want to tell her that I don’t.  But I kind of have
to.  She’d figure it out eventually anyway.  So I shake my
head. 

“No.
I’m sorry.  I don’t remember yet.  But your pictures are in my
phone.”

The
pretty blonde girl- Reece—is dismayed, but she quickly tries to hide it.
 She’s like a cheerful ray of sunshine and the clouds are covering up her
smile.  I feel guilty about that.

“I’m
really sorry,” I tell her again. 

“It’s
okay,” she assures me. “You’ll remember soon. I’m just so happy to see you!”

“I’m
sure I would be happy to see you, too, if I could remember,” I tell her
regretfully.  I know it’s true.  When I couldn’t sleep last night, I
went through my old text messages.  I found about a million from me to
Reece, demanding that she return to Caberra.  Our text conversations had
me laughing.  She’s pretty funny. I can see why I liked her.

She’s
shaking her head now.  “Why are you still in bed?  It’s 9:00 a.m.”

And
she’s looking at me almost accusingly.  I narrow my eyes.

“If
you try and tell me that I’m normally a morning person, I’m going to know that
you’re on drugs.  There’s no way that’s true.”

Reece
laughs.  “Heck, no.  I won’t even try it.  I’m actually surprised
that you haven’t thrown a pillow at my head yet.”

“Don’t
think I haven’t thought about it,” I tell her.  “But since we’re just
meeting- for the second time- I’m trying to be on my best behavior.”

She
laughs again.  “You’re the same Mia, even if you don’t remember,” she
tells me.  “You’ve always had spunk.  And you’ve still got it. 
That’s important, I think.”

“It
is?” I stare at her.  “I don’t think my mother thinks so.”

Reece
smiles. “You and your mom… you’ve been at each other’s throats since the day I
met you.  I doubt that’s ever going to change.”

“We
have?” I ask with interest.   “She’s trying hard to make me believe
that I’ve always been perfect… perfect manners, perfect behavior, perfect at
everything.  It didn’t really seem in-line with what I feel.”

Reece
laughs now, a tinkling sound in the sunshine of my bedroom.  In fact, she
laughs until she is gasping for air.  I find myself glaring at her.

“I
don’t think it was
that
funny,” I tell her wryly. 

“Oh,
but it is,” she gasps.  “If you could only remember.  You would just
die about that.”

“I
must have been a monster,” I mutter as I swing my legs out of bed.  Reece
looks at me and sobers up.

“No,
of course you weren’t,” she tells me quickly.  “You were just
feisty.  And you didn’t take crap from anyone. And you definitely didn’t
try to be perfect for your mother.  She has her own ideas about how the
perfect family should be that you’ve never agreed with.  You’ve never
wanted to pretend to be someone that you’re not.  I’ve always loved that
about you.”

I
sigh. 

“It’s
so good to hear you say that,” I admit to her.  “Gavin tells me that I
should just fall into rank and do what I’m told because it’s easier that
way.  And he should know- he’s in the same position as me.  But it
doesn’t feel right.  I don’t want to try and change who I am just to fit
an image.  But apparently, that’s sort of exactly what I was doing
before.  It seems that I was deliberately going out of my way to be the
opposite of what my parents wanted me to be.  I don’t really want to do
that either.  I just want to figure out who I really am and be that.”

Reece
is looking at me sympathetically and I don’t like that.

“Don’t
feel sorry for me,” I tell her.  “Please. I seriously hate that.”

She
tightens up her expression and leans over to give me a hug. 

“In
that case,” she answers.  “I’m glad to see you. Get your butt out of
bed.  We’ve got things to do and people to scare.”

I
laugh and she smirks. 

“That’s
something you would have said once upon a time,” she tells me.  I
grin. 

“Well,
then, let’s go scare some people.”

I
get dressed and Reece and I go downstairs for breakfast.  When we walk
into the kitchen, Dante and Quinn are lounging at the table with freshly
squeezed orange juice. 

Together. 

Which
seems odd to me. 

Quinn
grins lazily at me and I fight the urge to dive into his lap and rub up against
him like a cat.  That might not go over so well, so I restrain
myself. 

Dante
turns and his entire face lights up when he sees me.

“Mia!”
he says happily. 

He
gets to his feet and I look him over.  Yes, he’s exactly as I thought he
would be…like a fashion model.  He’s wearing khaki slacks and a button-up
shirt with rolled up sleeves.  The very picture of casual elegance. 
But he’s sexy as hell with that dimple in his chin and his sparkling
eyes.  I smile and he hugs me.

“It’s
good to see you,” he tells me quietly.  “I’ve been so worried about you
ever since I heard.”

“It’s
good to see you too,” I tell him.  “I don’t remember you right now, but
I’m hoping that I will soon.”

“You
will,” he tells me confidently.  “I have faith in that. Everything will be
fine.”

Dante
has an air of calm around him that is contagious.  I feel comforted by his
presence, like all will be well because he says it will be.  I like
that. 

He
pushes out the chair next to him for me and Reece sits next to Quinn.  I
can tell that there is no animosity there at all, they’re as comfortable as old
friends can be.  And Dante is perfectly secure with their
relationship.  As he should be. It’s apparent to anyone in a five mile
radius that Reece is completely in love with him.  Any thoughts she ever
had about Quinn are long gone.

“How
long are you home for?” I ask as I nibble on a fresh croissant.  Dante
shrugs elegantly. 

“We
don’t really know yet,” he answers.  “As soon as we heard about the quake,
we knew that we needed to come and help with the cleanup, especially when we
heard about you.  We talked my dad into it and here we are.  But I
don’t know how long he’ll let us stay.”

“How
can you miss school in America?” I ask curiously.  Dante shrugs again.

“If
we’re here too long, we’ll just finish out the year here. I’m not that worried
about it.”

I
know that Old Mia would be very happy to hear this.  And I’m sure that New
Mia will be too. Eventually. 
Soon.

Stupid
vague words.

“Reece
and I have to go see my father this morning,” Dante tells us.  “But this
afternoon, we’ve volunteered to help with a clean-up effort in town. 
Would you like to join us?”

“Of
course,” I say. Quinn is nodding too. 

“I’d
be happy to,” Quinn says.  He meets my gaze and my face immediately gets
hot.  I don’t know why.  I’m weird, I guess.  That’s a good
reason.  And also, I think he wants to come because I’ll be there. 
That’s a good reason, too.

OhMyWord.

That
thought makes me flustered.

I’m
suddenly finding it hard to breathe.  I try to breathe out of my nose like
a normal person, not out of my mouth like a weird mouth-breather.  But
panting makes that difficult.

“So,
want to meet here around 2:00?” Dante asks as he stands up.  “We can ride
together.”

“Sure,”
I tell him.  He bends down and squeezes my shoulder. 

“It
really is good to see you, Mi,” he tells me quietly and then gives me a peck on
the cheek.  I smile at him. 

“It’s
good to see you too,” I answer. And I mean it.  Even if I don’t remember,
it is still good to see them.  He and Reece are so friendly.  And
their blue eyes sparkle all of the time.  What’s not to like? 
They’re like friendly, witty Barbie and Ken dolls.  They’re a gorgeous
matching set.

They
leave and Quinn and I are left alone at the table.

“So,
what are your plans for the day?” Quinn asks.  “Until 2:00, I mean?”

I
shrug.  “I’m not sure yet.  I’m thinking about seeing if Gavin wants
to go diving.  I’ve got to see if I still know how to swim somehow. 
I’ve got a deal to uphold.”

Quinn
grins.  “You sure do.  And you don’t strike me as someone who would
renege.”

I’m
already shaking my head.  “Never.”

He
laughs and clears his plate, putting it in the sink.  I like the fact that
he does that.  It’s a thoughtful thing, even though it’s small.  My
gaze flickers to his butt, which is framed perfectly in worn Levi’s.  I
seriously doubt there is a pair of jeans in the world that doesn’t agree with
that butt.  And then he turns and catches me checking his agreeable butt
out.