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money they had; Jake could have easily made do with the one saddle, but Tor pointed out that

every horse they had, barring poor Cotton and maybe Jacob's, would be a working animal. Saddles

all round would make the most sense, because no matter how often Jake had one horse out, some-

one would be on the other. Just because River was aging didn't mean that he was being retired just

then.

When they arrived at Steve Adleman's place, the three of them piled out of the truck and stopped in

the drive long enough to pet the dogs who came to greet them, and then Adleman himself came out

of the stable, calling out a cheerful, "Howdy."

Jake and Tor exchanged good mornings with him, turning down the offer of a cup of coffee when

Jacob almost whimpered at the implied delay. It made Jake roll his eyes and Tor grin, but they both

relented and let him loose, watching with shaking heads as he went into the stable, leaving them in

his wake.

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He went right to the stall he wanted, the same horse waiting there as the first time they'd been

around. "Hey," Jacob said softly, letting the horse push at his hand. "Remember me?"

"Looks like he made his choice," Adleman said dryly.

Tor nodded as Jake wandered through the barn, close enough to listen and take part in the conver-

sation. "He's talked about only him," Tor said. "Don't think we could change his mind if we tried."

"So don't try," Adleman said with a laugh. "Think it's the other that'll need talking around, anyway."

Jake rolled his eyes. "Don't fret, I'll get it sorted," he said, looking back at them.

They both grinned at him and then Adleman went to where Jacob was loving on the six-year-old

gelding. "Want to take him around the ring?" he asked, pointing to the saddle over a stall wall.

Jacob nodded almost frantically and Jake watched as Tor helped him saddle up the horse, everyone

smiling. In a few moments, Jacob was leading his horse out of the barn and Tor was talking price

with Adleman as they followed him out.

Jake spent about twenty minutes looking at the horses in the stable, his choice already narrowed

down to two before they'd even arrived. One was a four-year-old mare with white markings, the

other a gelding who was a bit bigger, though not as big as River. They were both a rich brown

color, darker than the one Jacob had picked, but while they were perfectly fine horses from good

blood, Jake couldn't make up his mind. Finally, he decided it didn't really matter and went out to

watch Jacob ride, putting off the choice for a while longer.

He found Tor by himself, leaning on the fence and watching Jacob ride in the large, fenced-off

ring. "Where's Adleman?" he asked, leaning on the fence close enough to brush shoulders with Tor.

"Went in the house to find the horse's file. Be back soon." Tor leaned a bit and nudged him. "You pick?"

"Nah, not yet," Jake said, his eyes on Jacob. "I will."

Tor nodded and they stood there for a few minutes, just watching. Jacob was riding at an easy

walk, his face split by a huge grin. He stepped up the pace a bit as he came around the near corner

and more or less pranced past them, showing off and grinning even more, making them both laugh

back at him.

"Kid needs a proper cowboy hat," Tor said as Jacob slowed again as he cross to the far end of the ring. "But he looks damn good in the saddle. Took to it easy, didn't he?"

Jake nodded, eyes on Jacob. "He did," he said softly. "Took to it all pretty smooth." He swallowed and sighed. "Wish his mother could see this. He looks so fucking happy."

Tor's arm slid around his shoulders for a moment. "She'd be proud of him," he agreed. "I think 155

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she'd be pretty pleased with you, too."

Jake shrugged. "It's hard," he said softly. "Being happy for something that came out of hell. I miss her. He does, too. He hardly talks about her anymore, you know? But he still feels it."

"Of course he does," Tor said. "You both will--we all will--for a long time. But you're both doing it, don't lose that. You're doing better than surviving. Look at him, Jake. He's happy. He's healthy.

He's a good kid."

Jake nodded and sighed. "I know. And he's our family and I would only trade that to get 'Lissa

back."

Behind him, he could hear footsteps, so he cleared his throat and turned his head, nodding as

Adleman came up to them. "Looks like we're buying a horse," he said with a smile and a nod at Jacob, who was passing them by again.

"Good thing," Adleman said. "Think I'd have that boy here every day after school if you weren't."

They filled out the sale form as Jacob rode once more around the ring and finally dismounted

alongside them, grinning. "He's mine?" he asked, one hand patting the horse on the neck.

"Oh, yeah," Tor said with a grin. "You can relax now."

Jacob beamed and turned to the horse. "Hear that, Cobi? You're moving to our place."

Tor and Jake exchanged a look. "Cobi?" Jake asked carefully.

Jacob flashed him a grin before turning back to the horse. "Uh-huh. For Cobi Jones."

Tor cleared his throat. "Who is…?"

"Soccer player. Jeeze, you don't know who Cobi Jones is?"

Tor snorted at him. "I do now. All right, Cobi it is, and he's coming home, so you might want to

take him to his stall and get his tack off."

Jacob nodded and petted the horse again, then started to lead him away. "Which one are you buy
-

ing, Uncle Jake?" he asked, making an obvious effort to get out of his own preoccupation.

Jake shifted his weight uncomfortably. "I'll get that settled, don't worry."

Jacob and Tor both rolled their eyes, but Adleman grinned at him. "I've got one more you might

want to see," he said, eyes crinkling. "Just got here last weekend, thought you might be interested."

Jake tilted his head. "Didn't see one in the barn that wasn't there last time," he said, wondering why Adleman was being coy.

In response, Adleman merely pointed behind them, across the lane between the ring and another,

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smaller corral. Jake turned and Tor huffed a laugh, muttering something to Adleman that might

have been "sold".

Jake looked at the lone horse standing near the fence and started walking slowly toward her, moved

like he was tied to a lead himself. "How old is she?" he heard himself ask, though his thoughts were all on how much she looked like River. Maybe a hand or two shorter, but big and strong, and damn,

the markings were even close to being the same.

"Three. Barely broke, lots of spirit, but healthy and good natured. She likes people, likes being ridden; just got a lot of energy."

Jake nodded and climbed the fence, standing still as the filly eyed him and stepped forward. "Hey, darlin'," he crooned as the horse came near. "What's your name?"

Adleman cleared his throat. "I didn't name her, so you can't blame me, all right?"

Jake glanced back at him. "Okay," he said slowly. "That sounds… frightening." He turned back to the horse and reached out to her, patting her nose gently and letting her snuffle the cuff of his shirt.

"Well, you gotta know that the guy who named her never met River."

Tor snorted and Jake looked back again to see him reading a second file. "Tell me," he demanded, moving around the filly carefully, soothing her with his hands.

Tor grinned at him. "Well, you'll be interested to know that she's a great niece of River's. She's got good blood."

Jake nodded, wishing she was saddled and making do with giving her a pretty careful once over.

"Name?" he asked again, admiring the sleekness of her coat.

"Creek."

Jake glared at Tor. "Are you shitting me?"

Tor shook his head, looking like he wanted to laugh his ass off. "Nope. Her name is Creek."

"That's gonna change," Jake muttered to himself.

"Told you," Tor said, sounding satisfied. "Now, let's talk price and leave the man with his horse."

"Hey, I didn't say I was going to buy her," Jake said, though he had to admit that even he wasn't convinced by his tone of voice. "I haven't even ridden her yet."

"Saddle in the barn, knock yourself out," Tor said, closing the file. "Me and Jacob will let you know when it's time to load her up."

Jake glared at him, but he didn't say much else. He forced himself to wait until Tor and Adleman

had turned to walk away before he took hold of Creek's halter and started guiding her to the barn.

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He was going to ride his new horse and then he was going to tell Tor to shut up. After the horses

were loaded. And probably unloaded.

He wondered idly if Jacob would help him pick a new name, but then he thought of Cobi and

winced. Maybe not.

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Chapter Thirty Eight

He really should have noticed that things were going too well.

Jacob was doing well in school again, hadn't gotten into any more trouble, and was spending more

time than ever on the phone with Lillian. It made Jake glad that neither of them were old enough to

drive yet, and he pretended not to notice that the dip in Jacob's laundry coincided with extra pur-

chases of tissues with the groceries.

The new horses were settling in well, and Jake made sure that he spent as much time as he could

with Creek, getting her into shape for work. River was still his mount of choice, of course, but Jake

had to admit that Creek was a fine addition to the ranch, even if Tor did join forces with Jacob to

keep Creek's name. When a name plaque appeared on her stall door he finally gave in and let her

keep it, despite his feeling that horses named River and Creek was kind of silly.

It had been a good season, all told. The crops had worked out just about to expectation, the auctions

had done a little better, and even with the added expense of two horses plus everything that went

with them, they were doing all right.

That didn't mean he couldn't check the books again to make sure, though, and that was right about

the time that it was brought to Jake's attention that all wasn't exactly as bright in his life as he'd

thought.

It started with Tor's sigh as Jake got the ledger off the shelf. "What are you doing?" Tor asked. "It's Friday night."

Jake shrugged one shoulder. "Still gotta get up at six. Just another night, isn't it?" They'd go to bed at the usual time, get up at the usual time; Jake didn't really see how Friday could be any different

from Tuesday, really. Even the shows on TV were better on Tuesday. "Where's Jacob?" he asked, crossing to the desk in the corner.

"Kitchen. I think he's on the phone again."

Jake rolled his eyes and flipped the ledger open, then dug in the drawer for the check register. He'd

balance things out, maybe make some popcorn later and see if Tor could be put in a better mood by

some couch time.

"You're seriously going to do that?" Tor asked sharply.

Jake glanced over at him and nodded, a little confused. "Just going to make sure that things are

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right," he said in what he intended to be a soothing voice.

"Don't fucking patronize me," Tor said, standing up. "Of course they're right, you did them three days ago. And four days before that. What the hell do you think is going to happen every seventy-two hours, Jake?"

Jake stared at him and carefully closed the check register. "What?"

"Yeah, 'what'?" Tor glanced back to the kitchen and lowered his voice. "I'm sick of this, Taggart.

Just stop trying to control every single thing all the damn time, all right?"

Jake opened his mouth but couldn't find anything to say that made sense. So he said what he

thought, instead. "What the fuck?"

Tor glared at him. "You're doing it again. Only way fucking worse, and you don't see it at all.

You've gone beyond your whole Bossman routine here, cowboy. It ain't just me you’re trying to fix

all the time anymore, it's everything."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Jake said, standing up as well because sitting down with Tor fucking towering over him wasn't exactly the way things should be. Not when Tor was pissed,

anyway.

"I'm talking about the books, damn it. I'm talking about you fixing everything with Jacob, even his own battles--the ones you said you didn't want to fight for him. I'm talking about you taking over

every single thing you can in everyone's life and working yourself to fucking death on me."

Tor had made it back up to yelling and Jake could hear the silence in the kitchen like it was a

weighted blanket, stifling and smothering. He hissed a quick "Shut up," at Tor and watched the door, waiting for Jacob to appear.

"I will not shut up," Tor yelled. "We're having this out and we're doing it now, goddamn it."

"The hell we are," Jake said bluntly. There was no way in hell he'd have Jacob listen to this. No way at all Jacob would have memories of them fighting, not like Jake had of his parents screaming

and cursing at each other. He headed for the door himself, and kept on walking. Right past Jacob,

sitting silent at the table with the phone to his ear, and through the kitchen into the yard.

He could hear Tor coming after him, the screen door swinging shut with the same bang it always

made, only this time it seemed louder, sharper. Not willing to have Tor yell for him to stop, Jake

did it himself, turning and waiting as Tor came to him with heavy, quick steps. "Don't you ever yell at me when Jacob can hear."

"Don't you ever tell me to shut up," Tor snapped back, his eyes flashing.

Jake nodded stiffly, waiting for the next round of Tor's aggression. When it didn't come and the

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