Minecraft: Diary of a Minecraft Zombie Book 5: School Daze (An Unofficial Minecraft Book) (4 page)

Sunday

I met up with Steve and I told him my idea.

“You know, you can do a presentation about where Zombies come from,” Steve said.

“Where do they come from?”  I asked.  “I’ve been trying to get my Mom to tell me but every time I bring it up, she keeps changing the subject.”

“I’ve heard stories,” Steve said.  “Most of the stuff I know came from movies.”

“Well, if there is one thing I know about movies, Is that they’re really accurate,” I said.

So me and Steve spent the whole night putting my presentation together.

I even got the other guys to agree to help act out the different parts in it.

Man, we added so much crazy stuff into the presentation that it’ll probably get me banned from school.

Hey, a kid’s gotta’ do what he’s gotta’ do to…Especially when summer vacation is on the line.

Monday

Well, today we’re having our end of year assembly.

We’re going to be showing our presentations to the whole 7th grade class, including all the teachers, the Principal and the parents.

My presentation is ready.  And the guys are ready. 

I think this presentation is going to go down in history as the most infamous presentation ever given at a Mob middle school.

I actually think that it could get me arrested.

But hey, as long as I don’t have to go to camp, that’s all that matters.

Here goes nuthin’...

Monday Night Special Entry

I think it worked!

When it was my turn to do my presentation, I could tell that people were looking forward to something like all the other kids did.

So I knew my presentation would have a good amount of shock value.

Before I started my presentation, they turned off all the lights, except for a spotlight on the stage.

I walked out onto the stage and I started telling the tale of the “Untold Story of the History of Zombies.”

And it went like this:

Where do Zombies come from?

Not many people know.

But after some extensive investigative Zombie journalism, we’ve discovered the truth.

It all began when the human government decided that they wanted to create stronger soldiers.

They had lost too many battles, and now they wanted to win every war that they fought.

So they approached some soldiers in their army to join a special secret project. 

The only requirement was that the soldiers they chose had no living relatives…

…So that no one could claim their bodies in case something went wrong.

So, they exposed these soldiers to an experimental virus to enhance their abilities and make them into super soldiers.

The experiment seemed to be working.

But then, something terrible happened...

The soldiers went crazy, and they were horribly disfigured.

Ultimately, the experiment claimed their lives.

But, when the soldiers were being prepared for burial, they suddenly came to life.

They were not only walking, but they had enhanced strength, enhanced sense of smell and enhanced hearing.

They attacked the soldiers in charge of burying them.  And the recently bitten soldiers also transformed into the living dead.

Before long, the entire army base was contaminated with the virus.

Once everyone in the base was exposed, the virus mutated and the soldiers began having an overwhelming craving for something warm and mushy.

They longed for brains!

Soon, the army of the living dead found their way to the next unsuspecting town in search of brains.

They attacked that town, biting anything that moved both human and animal.

Soon that town was overrun.

The virus spread from town to town, and city to city until the entire world was contaminated.

It was the first Zombie Apocalypse.

After hundreds of years had passed, the Zombies started to evolve and began developing intelligent thoughts.

They began forming villages, and then towns and then entire cities of Zombies were created.

The Zombies made great advances in health and science, and became highly advanced technologically.

But, eventually the Zombies’ appetite for brains and warm flesh gave way to an even greater craving...

The craving for...CAKE!

Their overwhelming desire for cake resulted into an explosive rise in the baking industry.

Cake shops began springing up on every corner of every Zombie city street.

They just couldn’t get enough!

The human race began growing again, too.

Human villages of farmers and miners began springing up.

And because the Zombies were a peaceful race, they coexisted with the humans by staying away from them.

But soon, the Zombie’s resources began to become scarce; especially the cake.

So Zombies began scaring villagers in order to get the supplies they needed; especially the highly valued resource of cake.

Now Zombies send their kids to Scare School to train their children from a very young age.

They train them on how to effectively scare humans in order to get their needed supplies; especially cake.

And so it has been until today.

Thank you.

The entire audience was dead quiet.

Everyone just sat there with a stunned look on their face.

They started walking out of the auditorium in silence, with their heads hanging low.

Mom and Dad were really quiet on the way home, too.

So I know I finally did it.

I’m going to flunk my history class, for sure.

Who knows, I might even get kicked out of school.

But, all I know is that I can say goodbye to camp.

It’s going to be the best summer ever!

Tuesday

I think I’m cursed.

No matter what I try, I can’t get out of going to camp!

I know someone, somewhere, talked to a witch who put a curse on me.

I bet it was big mouth Jeff...

Or maybe it was Mike Magma.  He probably has a witch for a ghoulfriend and she put a big hex on me.

Whatever it is, nothing I try seems to work.

I thought for sure that my presentation would get everyone at school so mad that they would definitely flunk me out of school.

How did I know there would be reporters at the school yesterday?

And how did I know that someone would record it and put it on the Mob-net?

But there I am, on the front page of today’s paper.

“Possible Zombie Missing Link Discovered by Genius Middle School Zombie Kid”

And the recording went viral, so everyone in the Overworld is talking about it.

The Principal even talked about making me the 7th grade valedictorian.

And, my parents were so proud, that they promised they would pay for me to go to camp every year for the rest of my school life.

I don’t get it. 

I mean, I just don’t get it...

Wednesday

Today all of the guys were talking about their summer plans again.

Creepy started telling me about how excited he was that I get to go to camp for a whole three weeks.

“They’re going to have a lot of team building games, and cool sports stuff,” He said.  “We can even bunk together.  I hope you don’t mind, but I hiss sometimes when I sleep.”

I don’t know how I felt about the last thing Creepy said.

I started feeling a little sad because I was going to miss most of my friends this summer.

Sally had already left last week on her summer vacation.

Her parents planned to take her on a world tour of all the Biomes.

Man, it sure must be cool having parents that are rich, I thought.

I told Sally how depressed I was about going to camp.

“Don’t worry about it, Zombie.  You might just have a great time.  When I went to camp, I thought I would hate it too.  But I ended up making some of the best friends I’ve ever had,” She said.

“What about the killer counselors and the rotten flesh eating nurses?”  I said.

“That’s just your imagination talking,” She said.  “Besides, the only thing that could kill you at camp is the cafeteria food. Just make sure you pack lots of snacks.”

I wasn’t sure if she was joking when she said that last part or if she was serious.

I guess it will be fun writing letters to my friends over the summer.  And I can always call them.

My Mom said that if I fill my summer with a lot to do, summer vacation will go by real quick, and I’ll see my friends at school in no time.

So, I’d better get used to making a lot of lanyards and macaroni pictures.

Thursday

We got our report cards today.

I never thought I would be sad about getting straight A’s in all my classes, though.

Which is really weird because I’ve never gotten an A in any class. C’s and D’s are more my style.

I did get a B once.  But I think it was because the gym teacher felt sorry for me.

I’m the Zombie that teachers always write on his report card, “He’s got so much potential.”

I figured that as long as the teachers know, why waste time trying to prove it?

Anyway, it feels really weird not having to hide my report card from my parents for a change.

No trying to erase my grade, or intercepting the teacher’s zmail, or answering the phone using my Mom’s voice.

I can actually just come home and hand my report card to my Mom and Dad.

Still feels really weird, though…

Today we had the 7th grade Mob award ceremony, too.

That’s when all the 7th grade Mob kids get an award for not flunking out of Scare school, but making it to 8th grade.

For some reason, they made us wear these really funny caps and gowns.

Slimey had a hard time finding a cap and gown his size.   So he used a piano cover instead.

Creepy had a hard time putting his on.  I think it’s because he doesn’t have any arms.  

You know, that’s probably why he walks around naked all the time.

Skelee looked real good in his cap and gown.  He said he didn’t even have to buy one.  His uncle’s had his old one lying around in the closet.

Though we still don’t know what the sickle is for.

But we all got cool awards.

Slimey got the “Most Well-Rounded Student” award.

Creepy got the “Most Sensitive Student” award.  I think that meant that he was sent home the most this school year.

Skelee got the “Most Transparent Student” award.

And I got the “Most Shocking Turnaround of Any Student, Ever” award. 

Didn’t really understand what that meant, but it was cool.

Friday

Today is our last day of school.

They decided to have a carnival for us, which I thought was really cool.

There’s going to be rides, mob game booths, rotten candy, zombie clowns (which are really creepy by the way), a Scary-Go-Round and a Ferris wheel.

Me and Skelee really like the Scary-Go-Round.

Slimey likes the rotten candy.

Creepy says he likes the Ferris wheel.  He says he just loves the thrill of being up so high. 

Sometimes I really don’t understand what Creepy says sometimes…Everybody knows he’s afraid of heights.

But, even though I have to go to camp in a few weeks, I’m looking forward to having fun these last few days of freedom with my friends.