Ming Tea Murder (27 page)

Clods of earth flew at Theodosia and Duke as both sets of horses dug their pounding hooves deep and hard into the turf.

“You're finished, Capers!” Theodosia shouted after him. “Give it up!”

As if in answer, Capers yanked his reins wildly, causing his team of horses to spin right, turning so sharply that his wagon almost tipped over.

“He's going back onto Murray Boulevard,” Theodosia yelled.

“Giddyup!” cried a voice from behind her.

Theodosia spun around in surprise and saw Aunt Acid lying in the far back corner of the hay wagon. She was giggling like mad and hanging on for dear life.

“We've got a passenger,” Theodosia told Duke.

But Duke's face was set in a grim line. “Tell her to hang on tight.”

“You hear that?” Theodosia asked Aunt Acid. “You've got to hang on.”

“Giddyup!” the old lady cried again.

“What's that up ahead?” asked Duke. They were running full tilt now and starting to close on Capers's wagon.

“Holy guacamole,” said Theodosia. “It's the WCTV van. I think they're conducting some sort of interview.”

The two wagons flew directly toward a shiny white TV van with a satellite dish on top, toward the bright glow of lights where Stephanie Hayward was conducting what was probably a slice-of-life Halloween interview. She was leaning down, talking to a group of costumed trick-or-treaters. Doing what the station would call a human-interest story.

Stephanie, her cameraman, and the kids saw the first wagon coming and jumped out of the way, just in the nick of time. Then Theodosia's wagon bore down upon them.

“Stephanie!” Theodosia yelled as they spun past. The cameraman, a seasoned correspondent who knew his trade, immediately swung his camera toward them and managed a fairly decent tracking shot as they raced by.

“Yeehaw,” cried Duke. “Now we're on TV.”

“Dear lord,” Theodosia muttered as the hay wagons rocked and creaked and plunged through the dark night.

Of course Tidwell picked that exact moment to call her back!

Bracing herself, hanging on tight, Theodosia grabbed her phone, and said, “What took you so long?”

“It depends on what you want,” Tidwell grumped.

“Backup!” Theodosia shouted. She was hanging on for dear life as the wagon careened onto Ashley Street.

“What are you talking about?” said Tidwell. Then, sounding suspicious, he barked, “Where are you?”

“If you turn on WCTV right now,” Theodosia told him, “I think our hay-wagon chase is being broadcast live!”

“Hay wagons?” screeched Tidwell. “Live?”

“From the Haunted Hayride,” cried Theodosia. “Just please hurry up and get over here with as many squad cars as you can spare. Try to set up some sort of barricade across Montagu. Or maybe Calhoun Street! I mean, you're going to have to stop a whole lot of horsepower!”

“Miss Browning!” came his shout, but she was already hanging up on him.

• • •

“Your man's turning
again,” shouted Duke.

“Dear lord,” said Theodosia. Was Capers going to head back into the Historic District? What new havoc would this cause?

But just as Capers rounded a corner, his right front wagon wheel caught the corner of a wrought-iron fence. There was an agonizing screech of metal, a sudden shuddering of the entire wagon, and then the vehicle began to tip.

“Noooo!” Capers screamed.

His cry sent shivers down Theodosia's spine.

Duke pulled back on the reins to slow their wagon as they both watched in horror. Slowly, inexorably, Capers's runaway wagon tipped up onto two wheels. It seemed to teeter for a moment, as if undecided. Then a sudden jerk from his team of horses sounded its death knell. The wagon rolled over onto its side with a thunderous crash. Hay bales tumbled, wood shattered, and Percy Capers was pitched headlong onto the cobblestone street!

His wagon dragged and screeched for another twenty feet. Then the horses, who'd clearly had enough, came to a stop.

Theodosia jumped out while Duke stayed behind to secure his team. She ran to Capers, slewed to a stop, and gazed down at him.

Capers hadn't fared well. He'd fallen hard and landed badly on his side. And from the way he was crying and whimpering, he had probably broken a couple of bones.

Capers tried to roll over, then caught sight of Theodosia. “Help me,” he cried in a dry, papery voice. “I'm hurt.” His eyes traveled upward, finally meeting her stony gaze. “You've got to help me,” he pleaded.

Theodosia knelt down next to him and thrust her cell phone in his face. “You help me, I'll help you,” she said in a flat voice. “A little quid pro quo. I think that's reasonable, don't you?”

“What?” Capers gasped.

“Did you kill Edgar Webster?” she asked.

“Help me,” said Capers. His voice was a wet sigh. “Call for an ambulance.”

“I'm going to, I really am,” said Theodosia. “But you have to give me something in return.”

Capers gritted his teeth. “Okay, yes.”

“Webster,” she repeated.

“It was an accident, I swear.”

“An ice pick in the ear was an accident?” Theodosia shook her head. “Now, about the money . . .”

“Please,” groaned Capers. “I'm hurt bad.”

Duke came over and stood next to Theodosia. “Jeez,” he said. “The guy's in kind of a bad way. We should get him to a hospital.”

“Almost done here,” said Theodosia. She leaned closer to Capers and practically whispered in his ear. “You were the intermediary, weren't you? You handled the purchase of the tea house?”

“Yessss.” His voice was a low hiss.

“And you dipped your beak into a pile of money. To the tune of one-point-one million dollars, am I right?”

Capers writhed on the ground, practically gnashing his teeth. “All right, yes!”

“But Edgar Webster caught you with your hand in the cookie jar,” said Theodosia.

“Jeez,” said Duke. He hooked his thumbs in his belt. “He really stole the money?”

Theodosia gave a thin smile. “Webster caught you stealing the money, didn't he, Percy? And that's why you killed him.”

Capers groaned.

“Was that a yes?” said Theodosia.

“Yes,” said Capers.

“Good.” Theodosia stood up and clicked off the recorder on her phone. Five seconds later it rang. It was Tidwell again, talking a mile a minute, rocketing questions at her.

Theodosia listened for a few moments, and then said, “It's over. Percy Capers's wagon overturned and he was pitched out into the street.”

That put an end to Tidwell's rant. “Is he hurt?”

“I imagine he could use an ambulance,” said Theodosia. “And an armed guard. The man's dangerous, after all. He killed Edgar Webster.”

“Capers did?” Tidwell started squawking like an angry crow. “Capers
told
you that?”

Theodosia glanced around. Duke had gone back to tend to the horses. “Full confession,” she said. “Caught on tape.”

“What else?” said Tidwell. “What else is Capers saying?”

Capers twisted abruptly. Quick as a snapping turtle, one hand shot out and closed hard around Theodosia's ankle. With an iron grasp and a sharp yank, he wrenched her leg out from under her.

Theodosia crashed to the pavement with a bone-jarring thump.

“Gotcha!” Capers hissed malevolently. “Now give me that phone!”

That was when Aunt Acid stepped in, cool as you please, and hit him in the face with a shot of her pepper spray. “Take that!” she cried. “Don't you dare mess with my favorite tea lady!”

“Owwwww!” were Capers's final words.

The ambulance showed
up some two minutes later. Tidwell rolled to the scene in his Crown Victoria five minutes after that. He stomped around, grumbling like an angry bear and looking generally unhappy.

But Tidwell was smart enough to listen patiently as Theodosia and Harlan Duke filled him in as best they could. Tidwell asked a few questions, then got Elliot Kern on the phone and related the complete Percy Capers story to the museum director. Elliot must have thanked Tidwell profusely or said something highly complimentary, because he suddenly became a little more human.

Theodosia, meanwhile, had called Max. “It's all over,” she told him with a long sigh.

“Not quite,” said Max. “Drayton's just finishing up with the last tour.”

Theodosia had to chuckle. He didn't know. Of course, he didn't know. “I didn't mean the tour,” said Theodosia. “I meant the whole murder-mystery thing.”

“What!” Max screeched.

“Tell you what,” said Theodosia. “I'll explain everything to you real soon. If you and Drayton walk over to Church Street, we'll swing by and pick you up.”

“Pick us up?” said Max, sounding confused. “Pick us up in what?”

“In a hay wagon,” said Theodosia.

• • •

Theodosia was as
good as her word. Ten minutes later, she and Harlan Duke
clip-clopp
ed down Church Street to where Max and Drayton were waiting for them. Somewhere along the line they'd picked up a frantic Delaine, who was now sitting in the back of the wagon, cradling her feisty little aunt.

“You expect me to ride in that?” said Drayton when he saw the wagon.

“Hop aboard,” said Duke, “for the tea shop express.”

Drayton clambered on board, looking a little nervous. “We're really going to the tea shop?”

“Tidwell's going to meet us there,” said Theodosia.

“We're having tea?” asked Aunt Acid. “Oh, joy.”

• • •

And they really
did have tea. Drayton bustled about preparing pots of chamomile and black plum. Haley, in her apartment upstairs, heard the commotion and came shuffling down to help. She laid out cups, saucers, and plates, and then warmed up a batch of cherry scones.

By the time Detective Tidwell had arrived, the whole sorry story had been spilled, mopped up, and retold.

“I can't believe I'm in the clear,” said Max.

“You were always in the clear,” said Tidwell. He was seated at the head of the table in one of their ample captain's chairs. “Thanks to Miss Browning here.”

“Did you get in touch with Charlotte?” Theodosia asked him.

Tidwell nodded. “Yes. And I managed to speak with Roger Greaves, too. Needless to say, he was very much relieved that his business partner's killer has finally been apprehended.”

“We have to contact Cecily Conrad, too,” said Theodosia. “I think she was fairly convinced it was someone from the museum who killed Webster and then came after her. She just wasn't sure who.”

“Percy Capers,” Drayton spat out. “He probably figured Cecily knew something. That's why he went after her.”

“Probably,” said Theodosia. “And Capers was trying to scare everybody else off, too. Tossing that flaming bottle through Charlotte's window, roughing up Bill Glass.”

“Throw up a big smokescreen,” said Max. “Go big or go home.”

“Or go to jail,” said Tidwell.

Theodosia passed a scone to Tidwell, and said, “When you question Capers, I hope you squeeze him like a Florida orange. In fact, when you question him, I wouldn't mind being there.”

“Really, Miss Browning,” said Tidwell. He was pretending to be perturbed but not doing a very good job of it. He beetled his brow and forced a stern look on his face. “Haven't you meddled enough? And then to engineer that wild hay-wagon chase through the Historic District? My goodness. What do you have to say for yourself?”

Theodosia lifted her teacup and smiled serenely. “Film at eleven?”

The Indigo Tea Shop

Sausage and Gnocchi Soup

½ lb. sweet Italian sausage (ground, not links)

2 cups water

1 package vacuum-packed gnocchi (Bellino or Vigo)

2 cups beef broth

1 can (14 oz.) Italian-style stewed tomatoes (chopped, not drained)

½ cup Parmesan cheese (fresh grated)

COOK
sausage in large saucepan until browned. Add water, gnocchi, beef broth, and tomatoes. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat and allow to simmer for 5 to 6 minutes, or until gnocchi float to the top. Ladle soup into bowls and top with grated Parmesan. Yields 4 servings.

Prosciutto and Fig Tea Sandwiches

6 slices white sandwich bread

Butter

Fig jam

Prosciutto, 6 thin slices

1 pear, peeled and sliced thin

SPREAD
3 slices of bread with butter and 3 slices with fig jam. Layer prosciutto and pear slices on the buttered bread, then top with the fig jam slices. Slice off crusts and cut into triangles. Yields 12 small sandwiches.

Green Tea Donuts

1¼ cup flour

¾ cup sugar

½ tsp. baking soda

½ tsp. salt

½ tsp. matcha green tea powder

2⁄3 cup oil

½ cup buttermilk

1 egg

½ tsp. white vinegar

½ tsp. vanilla extract

PREHEAT
oven to 350 degrees. Combine flour, sugar, baking soda, salt, and green tea powder in a bowl. In another bowl, combine oil, buttermilk, egg, vinegar, and vanilla. Pour the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients and stir until just combined. Fill a greased donut pan about two-thirds full and bake for 12 to 14 minutes. Add your own frosting or glaze. Yields 12 donuts.

Cream Cheese and Strawberry Tea Sandwiches

1 loaf date nut bread

Cream cheese, softened

Strawberries, hulled and sliced

SLICE
date nut bread and spread each piece with cream cheese. Arrange sliced strawberries on top and serve open-faced.

Church Street Peanut Butter Cookies

1 cup butter (2 sticks), softened

1 cup peanut butter

1 cup sugar

1 cup brown sugar, packed

2 eggs

2 cups flour

1 tsp. baking soda

½ tsp. vanilla extract

PREHEAT
oven to 325 degrees. Combine butter, peanut butter, both sugars, and eggs. Mix in flour, baking soda, and vanilla. Drop by the teaspoonful onto a greased baking sheet, leaving at least 1 inch between cookies. Bake for 10 to 12 minutes, or until cookies are set. Yields 4 dozen cookies.

Blueberry Sour Cream Muffins

2 eggs

1 cup sugar

½ cup vegetable oil

½ tsp. vanilla extract

2 cups flour

½ tsp. salt

½ tsp. baking soda

1 cup sour cream

1 cup blueberries

PREHEAT
oven to 400 degrees. In large bowl beat eggs, gradually adding sugar. Continue beating and pour in oil and vanilla. In a separate bowl, stir together flour, salt, and baking soda. Stir dry ingredients into egg mixture, gradually incorporating sour cream. Gently fold in blueberries. Scoop batter into a greased muffin tin. Bake for 20 minutes. Yields 12 muffins.

Chicken and Green Goddess Tea Sandwiches

6 slices whole wheat bread

Green goddess dressing

Chicken, cooked and sliced

Avocado, pealed and sliced thin

Salt and pepper

SPREAD
each slice of bread with a thin layer of green goddess dressing. Arrange chicken slices on 3 pieces of bread. Top the chicken with avocado slices, then salt and pepper to taste. Top sandwiches with the remaining 3 slices of bread. Trim off crusts and cut into triangles. Yields 12 tea sandwiches.

Haley's Honey Scones

2 cups flour

1 Tbsp. baking powder

¼ tsp. salt

5 Tbsp. butter, cold and diced

¼ cup sour cream

4 Tbsp. honey

1 cup cream, plus 3 Tbsp.

Sugar

PREHEAT
oven to 350 degrees. Mix together flour, baking powder, and salt. Cut butter into mixture until crumbly, then stir in sour cream. In a small bowl, mix together honey and 1 cup of cream. Add cream mixture to flour mixture, stirring until a soft dough forms. Place dough on a lightly floured work surface and roll out to about ¾ inch thickness. Using a circular cutter, cut out scones. Places scones on a baking sheet that has been lined with parchment paper. Use a pastry brush to coat the tops of scones with the extra 3 Tbsp. of cream. Sprinkle with sugar and bake for 15 to 18 minutes or until golden brown. Serve with Devonshire cream or whipped cream. Yields about 16 scones.

English Tea Bread

1½ cups dates, chopped and pitted

1½ cups sugar

1 tsp. salt

2 Tbsp. butter

1½ cups boiling water

1 egg, lightly beaten

2¾ cups flour

1 tsp. baking soda

1 tsp. cream of tartar

1½ tsp. vanilla extract

1 cup walnuts, chopped

PREHEAT
oven to 350 degrees. Place dates, sugar, salt, and butter into a bowl. Pour in the boiling water and stir. Set aside to cool. Once cool, mix in the egg. Stir flour, baking soda, and cream of tartar in a large bowl. Add the date mixture to the flour mixture and stir to combine. Mix in the vanilla extract and walnuts. Pour batter into a greased 9” x 5” loaf pan. Bake for 1 hour and 15 minutes. Cool in pan before turning out onto a rack to cool completely. Slice and spread with cream cheese or wrap in foil and store in refrigerator.

Chutney Crescents

½ cup butter (1 stick)

1 small package cream cheese (3 oz.)

1 cup flour, sifted

½ cup chutney (prepared)

1⁄3 cup sugar

1 tsp. ground cinnamon

PREHEAT
oven to 375 degrees. Cream butter and cream cheese together. Beat in flour until dough forms a smooth ball. Wrap in aluminum foil and chill overnight. Remove dough from refrigerator 30 minutes before using. Roll dough out to 1⁄8-inch thickness and cut with round 3-inch cookie cutter. Place a small spoonful of chutney in the center of each round. Fold over and gently press together. Bake on an ungreased baking sheet for about 15 minutes. When cooled, roll in mixture of sugar and ground cinnamon.

Cherry Banana Bread

1 cup sugar

½ cup butter (1 stick)

2 eggs

3 bananas, mashed

2 cups flour

1 tsp. baking powder

1 jar maraschino cherries (10 oz.), chopped with juice

PREHEAT
oven to 350 degrees. Cream together sugar and butter. Beat in eggs and bananas. Blend in flour and baking powder. Stir in cherries and juice. Pour batter into 3 small, greased loaf pans and bake for about 45 minutes. Yields 3 small loaves.