Misconception (Finnegan Brothers Book 1) (3 page)

I looked down at my hands, taking sudden interest in the hot pink nail polish that was peeling off of my left hand. “It's just that I've been thinking, you know I'm going have to go wherever there is a job for me right?” I looked up at her for a brief moment to match her eyes with mine to see if she knew where I was going with this. “Dad has a lot of connections up in the Boston area. If there's a job there for me...”

“Then you would take it. I know how these things work. I also know that a lot of your friends still live up there and you miss them. I'm not the only one who misses Fayette. I also know how this economy is, and I have a job here, so your sister and I will be staying here. But wherever you go is up to you sweetheart. I'm not going to stop you from living your dreams. That's not what parents do.”

As much as she was saying exactly what I wanted to hear, it still hurt. I couldn't imagine myself leaving her and Kenz behind, but at the same time my degree in business management would only get me so far in an area where I didn't know many people. My dad had the networking abilities of a champion, and I knew that in this economy I needed to use those connections. It helped that his law office managed many of the cases for local big business. He may even have a few connections in New York City.

“I still have a year to work on it.” I had taken time off after the divorce and was finishing my degree a year late, but I was determined to find a job as soon as I graduated.

She smiled sweetly, “Yes but you're about to go for an entire summer up with your dad and it would certainly help if you were kind to him and talked to him about some potential job opportunities. I get it honey, really I do. Besides, Kenz will be leaving for school in the Fall, so she’s got big things going on too. Then it will just be me.” She placed her frail hand on my own and sighed. “But I’m okay with that. I have Kelly, too.” I noticed how the colors of our skin looked so different. I had spent my weekends during the spring at the beach while she locked herself in an office trying to build up a name for herself in the company. She was just a different person than she had been when she was with my dad,—maybe a better person, who knows? She could certainly stand on her own two feet now, even if it was difficult. While I gazed at her sweet smile and her faded brown eyes, she squeezed my hand and infused some of her confidence in me. She may not have been particularly happy with her own life but she would do anything to make sure the two of us had everything we ever needed. That's just what moms do.

I heard my sister yell something from the stairs with her suitcase thumping behind her and my mom gave my hand another quick squeeze before going out to the living room to assist her. Our living room was at the front of the house so the door to the outside world waited for me only one room way. I took a deep breath before grabbing an apple and a bottled water from the refrigerator and stuffing them in my purse. I never went anywhere without a snack. My mom and Kelly helped us load our things into our car and then my mom got into the driver’s seat. Typically Kenz or I would have fought her for the position, but I think we both understood that it was something that she had to do as our mom. We waved goodbye to Kelly as we drove away and headed to the airport, not sure of what to expect from our month long trip to our old home.

4

The Fayette County airport was small. So when we arrived it didn't surprise me at all that they didn't even take the plane to the gate. Kenz and I just walked off the plane out onto the tarmac and waited for our luggage. After about half an hour standing around in the very hot sun we walked through the gate to see my father standing looking more casual than I'd ever seen him before. And by casual, I mean khakis and a golf shirt, because that's really going crazy for my dad. He's a businessman, a lawyer, and a pretty big one at that. It wasn't hard to keep all the terms the divorce hush-hush, because he did it as a profession. Charity stood next to him practically bouncing up and down with excitement over our arrival. Her paid for boobs hardly moved during all her bouncing, and it was nauseating. If she didn't look so fake, or act so obnoxious, perhaps I would've believed it a little bit more. But her overly bubbly personality just made me want to gag. I couldn’t believe this woman was going to become part of
my
family.

“Hi Dad,” I said as I wrapped my arms around him in a light hug. “Charity, nice to see you.”

She put her arms around me before I had the chance to pull away, “Oh I am just so excited you're here!”

She had a sweet southern drawl that felt unnatural.

Mackenzie stood behind me but barely nodded at either of them. I thought she and Dad were back on speaking terms, but sometimes I couldn't keep up with their lack of relationship. But Dad deserved that; he had done it to us, and it was no one’s fault but his own.

“We're really excited to have you girls here for the wedding. Thanks for coming.” I could tell he was being sincere and genuine, but it didn't make it any easier. Wedding. It felt like poison every time he said it. When we had talked on the phone over the past couple months to make arrangements, every time he said it I could tell it hurt him. Even if he loved Charity, which I assumed he did, it didn't mean that it didn't hurt him that this was his second marriage. That his marriage with my mother had failed, epically.

“I'm really excited to be here to Dad, and I promise we'll be on our best behavior.” Everybody looked at Mackenzie, but she didn't respond until I jabbed her in the stomach with my elbow.

“Ow! Was that for?”

I looked over my shoulder and mumbled to her, “You know what that was for. Play nice.”

I turned back around and smiled at both of them just as I had seen my mother do thousands of times when we lived in Fayette. Passive aggressive was our thing, and we could do it with style.

“Well let me grab your bags,” my father said, and hurriedly picked up our two suitcases while I grabbed my carry-on. “I'm really glad you shipped a lot of the stuff, I can't imagine how much you would've had in baggage fees if you didn't.”

I smiled at him, but it was awkward, and he knew it as well as I did. I don't think anybody couldn’t feel the palpable tension that was going on in our new little unit. Before my dad dropped a bomb on me in the car, you could cut the tension with a knife. And then the shit storm hit.

“So Charity and I have some exciting news, and I think you girls are really going to like it.”

Finally Mackenzie sounded interested in the conversation, “Oh? And what's that?”

She turned to me and mouthed the word ‘baby’, but I just rolled my eyes at her.

He looked at both of us in the rearview mirror, “Charity and I have gotten a place of our own. We just signed the papers on the old house.”

“What? You sold our house?” I was floored. This hadn’t even been debated with us! That was our childhood home. A lot of great memories were there.

This time Charity piped in, at the wrong moment. “Well really … I mean, you girls haven't visited in quite a long time. I just kind of felt like it probably wasn't even home to you anymore, and that's the only reason that David was keeping it anyway.”

David. I hated how she said his name. “Well David didn't have any right to sell our house without discussing it with us first.”

I looked over at Mackenzie who was leaning against the window looking out like she was in another world. “Kenz did you hear that? They sold our house!”

She looked back at me without any emotion, hollow almost. She just shrugged her shoulders, “Dad mentioned something about it on the phone a couple months ago. I didn't think he was serious.”

I looked back at the front seat where my father was sitting silently, “So what, you told her but not me? Is that because you knew I would have a real reaction? You're still such a God damn coward.”

“I will not have you speaking to me like that, Lena. I thought you and I were over our issues.”

I rolled my eyes and shook my head, “We will never be completely over our issues.” So much for me accepting who he was. I guess I was wrong, we’re still a freaking mess of a family.

The rest of the ride was silent. I'd only been back in Fayette for half an hour, and already I was making plans for an escape.

5

“A rancher? You have got to be kidding me.”

I stood with my bag in my hand probably looking like a lost runaway staring at the beautiful newly built ranch. A one level home? That was not my father’s type. He picked our all brick colonial when I was a kid. It was so important to him to have all the bedrooms on one floor, the second floor. So why the hell now why was he in a ranch?

I looked over at Mackenzie who was a mirror image of myself, only slightly shorter and skinnier. She just shook her head and walked up to the wraparound porch. “At least we each have our own rooms,” she called to me. Silver lining, way to go kid.

“True.” If there was one thing I wasn't going to manage, it would be a month sleeping in the same room with my younger sister. I had enough on my plate was— I didn’t think I could handle all her drama in addition to it.

I sat down on the white bedspread covering the oversized Queen bed in my new “room.” I looked around at the furnishings, everything was white. I slightly felt like I was in a hospital, or magazine. Either way it wasn't very comfortable. I didn't even bother to unpack my suitcase, thinking I might as well just live out of it for the next month. My boxes had been hidden under the bed with the rest of the clothes that I had packed and the bridesmaid’s dress I was supposed to wear. It was also Lilac, just like Kenz’s rehearsal dress. Charity really liked Lilac I guess.

I stared down at my phone. I had already received two text messages from friends of mine from high school who still lived in the area. They wanted me to go to some bar that must’ve been new because I didn't recognize the name from my high school days. They said it had a younger crowd and that it was right on the beach so they did bonfires at night. Bonfires, just like I did with Blake during the summer before my freshman year in college. I chewed my lip as I thought for a moment about the Finnegan brothers. There was such a space between us, and I didn’t know how I would react to seeing them again, if either of them were even in the area. Many of my high school and early college friends had moved away for their careers or new families.

All that I could recall was the last conversation I ever had with Blake. And how the words tore through me like a blade. But I couldn’t tell him the truth. It hurt me too much, and it would've killed him. I’d broken the Finnegan Brothers. I wouldn't let them get under my skin again.

I texted Zoe back and told her that I'd be ready at about nine o'clock to be picked up. Not having a car for the summer was going to be a huge pain in the ass. She told me about how she was excited to see me and how we hadn’t gotten together in about a year. I thought about the last time I saw Zoe, waving a tearful goodbye to her at the airport as she left for the military. I was really glad to hear that she was home and safe. We only corresponded through e-mail while she was in Iraq, so it would feel really awesome to see her again, to be able to touch her and know she was real.

She had made plans with a couple of our other girlfriends from high school, and I was hoping that they wouldn't bring up the dramatic change in me. I used to be a double for Mackenzie: stunning blonde hair, beautiful pouty red lips, and an attitude to boot. But after the divorce announcement and that night, my confidence had severely wavered. I had dyed my hair dark brown, gotten a couple tattoos as I healed, and I'd taken that year off of school which haunted me. The old Lena would have never done those things, I just hoped that they could accept who I was now, more than who I was then.

I locked myself up in my new bedroom for most of the day reading a book or two that I had packed and shipped. Then I played Candy Crush on my phone and did my best to hide until Charity came knocking on my door around dinner time.

“Can I come in?”

I was about to say yes when she already opened the door. “Oh! I hope that was okay. When you didn't respond I just figured you weren’t in here. I was just bringing you some new sheets and towels. And dinner is ready whenever you want to eat. Don’t feel pressured to sit with David and I.”

I sat up on the bed. “Oh, thanks.”

“No problem, sugar.” She looked around the room with stars in her eyes, “Don't you just love how the interior designer did this room? I really thought it would just inspire you while you were here.”

Oh shit. Were we going to talk about my music? The one thing that hadn't healed in the four years since the divorce.

I had been a pianist, classically trained and all that. Sometimes I sang, but mostly I played while others had the spotlight. It was my original college major. I got a partial ride to a fancy university for music but after the divorce I lost all desire to play or sing. I lost the scholarship and went with business classes instead. We even sold my piano. Ten years of lessons down the drain.

She sat down on the edge of my bed, barely ruffling the comforter with her dainty frame. “I just think that it is so great that you sing. You should come to church sometime and sing in the choir. I just know that they would love that.”

Church? I don't go to church. “I don’t sing. I used to sing, and really I only did that while playing the piano.”

She sat up straighter, seeming to prepare for a fight. I decided to diffuse the situation instead of making it worse. “And you know, my relationship with Jesus hasn't been that great in the past four years. I think I’m better off just singing by myself and in the shower. But thanks for the offer.”