Misguided Truths: Part Two (Misjudged #4) (3 page)

I press my mouth against hers, and cup her breasts in my hands when I feel her gripping her fingers through my hair.

When an unexplainable burning sensation starts to run through my veins, I pull away, and see her running her hands down to my waist before pressing herself against me. Molding her body even closer, my eyes widen when she pulls me back down to kiss her again.
Damn I want her.
“We should …” No. It’s not gonna happen. I wouldn’t be able to stop now even if I wanted to. Instead of trying to talk myself out of this, I grab her by the waist, and then move my hands around to her ass. She’s feeling a little hot? Well, I think I need to show her exactly what she’s doing to me right now.

She glides one of her hands over my chest, and I look down when I feel her running her fingers over the waistband of my pants. I inhale a sharp breath when her fingers skim across my dick on the outside of my pants, and this action only makes my whole body tense up again. She wants …?
Shit. I didn’t bring any fucking condoms.
Before this gets outta hand, I really need to stop this, “Please, we should …” It’s still no use, how am I supposed to stop this when she’s rubbing her hand over me like that? It’s pretty simple. I can’t.

Fuck it.

Grasping her by the hips, I’ve decided to finally give in at trying to play the gentleman. I pull her back with me until we’re on the grass, with her now laying directly on top of me. Flipping her over until I’m hovering above her, I gaze back into her eyes, and then slowly lean down to kiss her again. Everything about her is addictive. Her lips, the way she moans.

My heart is hammering so fucking hard in my chest that I’m damn sure she’ll be able to feel it against hers, especially with the way our bodies are rocking against each other’s.
I want to touch her. I want to hear her. I need to feel her.

I place my hand lightly on her thigh, and go to move her dress to the
side before bringing my hand a little higher. As soon as I reach her panties, I stop, “I need your permission, because right now, I’m dying to feel how wet you are for me.”
Damn, I need to feel this.
When she opens up her dress, I swear all of my unspoken prayers have just been answered, and it takes all of my willpower to not look up at the sky right now, and whisper a silent prayer in gratitude.
Thank you for wearing a dress with a high split up the side!

I run my fingers slowly over her panties, and lean closer until my lips are skimming over hers, gently rubbing my thumb against her. Keeping my eyes on hers the whole time, I see hers flicker closed. When I slide m
y fingers underneath the fabric, I try my hardest not to groan or grab for my pants when I feel her lifting herself up against my hand.
Oh, she feels good,
“Shit, you’re so fucking wet, baby.” I say against her mouth, and when I slide a finger inside her, I watch as her eyes completely close.

Studying her as I slide my finger slowly in and out, I notice her cheeks beginning to redden under the moonlight, but when she reaches for my pants again, I pull away. She looks at me with a questioning expression filling her features, but I shake my head. Bowtie? Yep. Camera? Yep. Condoms?
Fuck my life.
But, when I see her eyes close again and her lips pulling up into a smile, I don’t think that I actually regret forgetting them for a single second. You wanna know why? Because never in my life have I ever wanted to watch someone like this before. I don’t need her to touch me because I’ve realized that I’m already feeling satisfied just from being able to watch her writhing in pleasure beneath me.

When I slip in another finger, I feel her tighten around them
, and know that it’s not gonna be long before I hear her moans again, “You’re close.” I say softly into her ear, and it’s now I feel and see her whole body beginning to tremble.

“Ah!”
That’s it, beautiful. Feel it.
Not once taking my eyes away from her face, I press my fingers deeper inside and rub my thumb against her more firmly this time, a smile forming over my mouth when I hear her moan again. “Fuck!”

When her body finally stops its trembling, I watch her chest rise and fall before moving over to lay beside her, “Are you okay?” I ask while reaching over to pull her dress back to how it was before.

“Yes, I um …” She tries to answer, but her breathing hasn’t fully calmed yet.

“I’m sorry. I got carried away.
” I tell her, and rake a hand through my hair when it becomes clear that she’s starting to regret what just happened.

“I don’t think you’re the only one,” she turns and smiles. Her smile is warm
, and it’s making me feel a little more at ease. “You didn’t want me to …?”

When her eyes land lower, I think I know what she’s referring to, “I wanted to feel and hear you,” I say, and smile while my eyes roam over her again. “I didn’t need you to give me anything in return.”
You gave me enough just then, believe me.

Lying on my back, I reach over and take a hold of her hand, stroking hers lightly with mine while staring up into the sky. I don’t talk, and she doesn’t seem too eager to start a conversation either, so we just stay like this for a while. It’s nice. Well, it was nice right up until some voices from behind
us just disturbed the silence. As I sit up, I notice her glance to her watch, “What time is it?”

“It’s just before midnight.”

Jumping onto my feet, I offer out my hand, and help her back onto hers. She doesn’t look at me again until I start chuckling when I see her hair. Although she still looks as good as she did earlier in the evening, it wouldn’t be such a great idea for her to be walking back with grass in her hair, “You um, there’s a little grass in your hair.” I reach over, move it away, and then bring my hands down to the straps of her dress. Moving them until they’re back in place, I swallow, and then take a step away from her. 

Running
both of my hands through my hair this time, I take a deep breath, and know that it’s probably gonna be a good idea for us to start heading back, “I’m sorry, but I’ve gotta be somewhere.” What I just said isn’t exactly true, but I think this is the part where we’d arrange to meet again, or swap numbers, or something. I don’t even know her name, but y’know what? That’s most probably a good thing. I reach up and stroke her face with the back of my hand. “Can I walk you back?”

“Sure.” S
he smiles as she answers, nods, and then reaches up to my eye mask. I stop her before she manages to grab a hold of it, and then lift her hand a little higher before placing a kiss on the back. I keep a hold of her hand the whole time as I lead her back toward the campus grounds.

I know I should say something, say anything to break this awkward silence, but I have no idea what to say to her.

As we make our way back up along the pathway, I notice there’s a few students hanging around one of the entrances outside the tent. The music seems to have finally stopped, so I’m guessing the ball has already finished for the night.

Slowing when we reach one of the buildings by the fountain, I turn around to face her
, and place a kiss on her forehead while stroking my fingers lightly over her arms, “Thanks for the dance.” I smile, keeping my eyes solely on her while taking a few steps back, only turning away when I hear a couple of voices approaching me from behind.

Once I make it onto the sidewalk and around the corner, I rest my head against the cold brick wall and remove the mask. I take a deep breath and smile over what’s just happened and the feelings I just felt, but when I reopen them, it hits me. Hard. Like someone just delivered a k
nockout blow to my lower abdomen and chest simultaneously.

A different sensation is starting to course through my entire body, and it’s making me feel paralyzed. I slide down the wall until I’
m sitting on the pavement, trying to understand what the fuck just happened, and what this new feeling is. A few seconds ago I was fine, but now my gut is starting to twist, my chest is aching, and images of Holly are beginning to flash through my mind.

Tonight was supposed to be one dance. Just one fucking dance
, and I wasn’t supposed to feel anything. I wasn’t. But, I did. I did, and it felt good. Really good to actually feel something. To feel normal again. I tried to stop. But, I couldn’t. The overwhelming rush I felt when I was with her …
kissing her
. It was addictive. I felt like I could be myself again. A carefree guy, having fun with someone. I felt like I did before. It was the same feeling I had when I was with …
when I was with Holly.

This doesn’t make any sense. I mean, last week I didn’t feel the things that
I’m feeling right this second.

Maybe I should explain
something here. There was a girl, and she’d been trying to seduce me all the way through my shift at the bar last Saturday. When I came out from the back room just before we closed the place for the night, she was there, waiting for me. I kept playing what happened that night over and over in my mind for at least a couple of days afterwards while I tried to understand what it meant.

We …
yes
. We had sex. Meaningless sex in the room out back. But, that’s all it was. It didn’t mean a damn thing, and at the time, it was a distraction. It made me unable to think. It gave me distance from who I am and everything I’ve been feeling inside for the past eighteen months.

It didn’t make any sense to me at first, but I thought that I finally understood. I couldn’t kiss her. I didn’t want to kiss her becaus
e the last person I kissed was Holly. And, where Holly and I were never intimate in that respect, I didn’t feel like this afterward. I felt nothing, and it felt good. But, tonight? I felt something. Something entirely different.

Shaking my head, I know
I shouldn’t be doing shit like this. Not anymore. I’m not that same guy I was. I wasn’t supposed to feel anything when I was with her tonight. I wasn’t.

I st
are at the mask that I’m clutching in my right hand for a couple of seconds, and then toss it to the ground before standing back up and heading down the sidewalk.

Guilt. That’s what this feeling is. I made a promise. I promised Holly that I’d always be loyal. Always be faithful. There’s only one place where I should
’ve been tonight. I need to be with her. I need to tell her that I’m sorry, and whatever that was back there, I need her to know that it won’t ever happen again. It can’t happen again because the new pain that’s running through my chest is the worst feeling I’ve experienced in a very long time, and I never wanna have to feel it again.

Rachael’s just called to see how my time at the ball was last night. Needless to say, I’ve been avoiding giving her any details
, and thankfully I’ve managed to steer our conversation toward more important matters in hand. We’ve been talking about one of the guys I met while I was on the inside. He was released just before I was, and though I kept myself to myself for the most part, he was one of the very few people who I actually had more than one conversation with during the whole time I was there.

I called him earlier this week, and he told me to hang tight while he looked into a few things for me. But, as of yet, I haven’t heard anything back. Sometime last week I told Rach that I’ll never stop, never give up until I find out exactly what happened that night. And, well, she offered to help. I mean, I knew she’d be on board because the people responsible not only took my girlfriend away from me; they took her little sister away from her, too.

“Yeah, everything else is cool,” I speak into my cell while jogging through to the kitchen to grab myself a soda. “So, what about you? Have you made any plans for the weekend?”

“Nothing for the weekend, but I thought that I might stop
by on Monday after your afternoon class. I managed to get a hold of someone who might be able to help us, and they said they’ll try and look into a couple of things, so I’ll be in the city.”

“Well, that sounds promising,” I slow my pace as I walk through to the living area
, and grab my jacket from off of the back of one of the dining chairs. “My last class ends at four on Monday.”

“Okay, well I’ll call you when I’m leaving. I love you.”

It always makes me smile whenever she says this. I know what I lost the day Holly died, but it was at that very time I was somehow fortunate enough to gain a sister, “I love you, too. Bye.” I end the call, and slip my arms into my leather jacket.

“Good morning to you, too!”

When I hear someone chuckling over by the couch, I glance to my right, and walk over when I see one of my roommates, James, peeking over the back. “Sorry, man. I didn’t see you there.”

“No worries. So, are you settling in okay?”

Nodding, I take a step back when I see the time, “Yeah. So far so good, I guess.” I tell him, and I can already see that he’s about to start firing a million questions my way. “Listen, I don’t wanna sound rude, but I’ve really gotta head to work, so …” I point over to the door, and smile before heading out of the building.

I stuff my hands in my pants pockets while slowly making my way down the steps, and then head toward the main gates. Because I’ve been watching the ground instead of what’s going on around me, I end up slamming into som
eone when I reach the sidewalk, “Sorry, totally my fault.” I mutter, and go to carry on walking, but the person I just knocked into grabs a hold of my shoulder.

Is he really
gonna start something with me because I accidently walked into him? Seriously? I turn around and narrow my eyes, ready for him to start something. I don’t fight, but I worked out enough in jail to be able to take a good care of myself.

“Brandon?” A beaming wide smil
e spreads over his entire face, and I’d know that smile anywhere.

“W
ell, if it isn’t Rye McGregor.”

***

I sent a quick message over to Rach when I first arrived in work at one o’clock, telling her who I happened to bump into on my way over here. I know that she’s been constantly worrying about me being out here on my own, especially because I don’t know a lot of people, so I told her that there's no need for her to worry about me anymore.

Rye was the last person I’d been expecting to see here in Seattle. But, listen to this. Not only is Rye living in the city, Neil’s here, too. In fact, they’re both studying music at the same college, and it’s highly likely that we’ll be in the same class come Monday morning.
Cool, huh?

While restocking the small refrigerator behin
d the bar, I feel a hand rest on my right shoulder and when I look up, I see Mark standing over me, waving five twenty dollar bills in my face, “Bravo, Mr. Disappearing Act. A very good performance!”

I swallow, hard, and look around to make sure no one else is close enough to hear him. The last thing I want or need is for him to start shooting his mouth off about last night, especially in front of Layla. Layla will tell Rach and, well, I really don’t need that to happen. It’s bad enough that I didn’t manage to catch any sleep again last night as it is.

“Here,” I look down to his hand when he offers my winnings over to me. “And I thought it was the sitter who’s supposed to get paid!”

Standing up, I shake my head
, and push his hand away from me, “No. Keep it.” I insist, and go to walk around him. It doesn’t feel right accepting the cash. Especially after what happened when I went outside. She wasn’t just some chick, and she definitely didn’t deserve to have a wager put above her head.
Man, she really needed to be just some other chick.

“No. No. I always pay my debts. Besides, I tried that line you used on some unsuspecting redhead, and let’s just
say, she was putty in my hands,
and my bed
.” He winks, his smile wide. That’s information I definitely didn’t need to hear.

“Well, I’m happy I could help,
” I throw over my shoulder, and bend to grab another crate of beer from off of the floor. “Instead of paying up, you could do me one small favor, though.”

He walks over and cocks hi
s head to the side, studying me, “Shoot.”

“Don’t mention last night to anyone. As far as you’re concerned, I stayed with you all night and then headed home. Not a word to Layla, and definitely no mention of this to Rach.”

“Oh, and then it all makes sense. You got lucky, and now you don’t want your girlfriend hearing about your dirty little antics. You can trust me, bro. What happened at the ball will stay at the ball.” He winks again, and pats my shoulder when he goes to walk out the front.

Yeah, if only things were really that fucking simple.

“Brandon, now that it’s getting quieter out here could you go ahead and start organizing the back room?” Layla calls over from the end of the bar.

“Sure,
” I place the crate back down by the side of the bar, and then head straight over to Neil and Rye. When I told Rye earlier where I'm working now, he said that he’d make sure he and Neil stopped by tonight. They’ve already been here for a couple of hours, and because this place hasn’t been overly busy tonight, we had a little time to catch up. “Hey, I gotta go and do a few things out back. Give me a shout when you’re heading out, alright?”

“Will do, bro,”
Rye nods, and I pat them both on the back once before making my way toward the hallway.

Once I’ve hauled the boxes of liquor around the back room
, and filled out a new drinks order, I wipe my brow with the sleeve of my shirt and rest my hands on my waist, “Okay, I think that’s everything.”

“Okay, great!” I see Layla
smiling as she checks through the order I just filled out. “Listen, it’s getting quieter out there by the second, and I’ve already told Seth that he can finish up early. You go ahead and knock off, too.” She walks out from the room, and heads into her office before I even have a chance to protest.

I notice there’s only around fifteen people in the whole place when I walk back into the main bar area, and see the guys sitting on a table over in t
he corner of the room, just up by the pool table.

“Are you done for the night, too, bro?” Neil calls over to me from where he’s sitting with Rye and a few other people, one of them being Seth. Though I’ve been working here a lot over the past couple of weeks, tonight has been the first shift we’ve actually worked together
because he headed home for the holidays.

“Yeah, it’s pretty dead,” I say as I near the table. “You guys want another drink before I knock off?” I glance around the table, but not one of them seems
to acknowledge what I’ve just asked, and then I notice Rye swinging his bottle of beer out in front of him before he speaks, “Alex, Alyssa. This is Brandon.”

I look across the table and see a blo
nde offering her hand out to me, “It’s nice to meet you,” she smiles, and I take her hand. “Seth just told me you’re the new guy in town.”

“Kinda,” I let go of her hand and grab a seat, pulling it closer to the table before offering my hand out to the brunette. “It’s nice to meet you …” Why didn’t I finish my sentence just now? Well, that could have something to do with the girl
who’s sitting directly ahead of me.

No. No. No. This cannot be happening.

Okay, think. Shit, do something. Do anything.

One thing's for sure, I need to quit staring into those big, chocolate brown eyes of hers, but shit. She’s hot. No, not hot. She’s stunning. Yep, you’ve guessed it. The girl from last night is staring right back at me.

Breathe, dude. Breathe. You’re gonna freak her out.

Freak her out? I’m freaking myself out.

Okay, this really isn’t healthy. I shouldn’t be having conversations with myself about this.

I need to look away before she recognizes me.

Break the gaze. Break the gaze now.

My palms are beginning to sweat
, and my heart rate picks up its speed. I clench my jaw tight so I can at least try and focus on anything else but …
those lips
, “Likewise … Alexis or Alex is fine.” She shakes my hand for a brief second before I pull it back away. I’m not appreciating in the slightest the way it just felt to be touching her again.

Alexis.

My eyes dart around the rest of the group to make sure they didn’t catch onto anything, and thankfully, it doesn’t look like they were paying any attention. When I take a seat opposite to her, I swallow, hard.
I was not supposed to see her again.

“We were thinking of hitting a club,” Neil suggests. A club sounds good. In fact, it sounds like a fucking great idea. I need to get completely and utterly intoxicated. Yeah, it
most definitely sounds like a plan.

“Are you gonna try and get in?” My head snaps over to the other side of the table when I hear the blonde speak. Alyssa? I think that’s her name, and notice that she’s aiming her question over at Alexis. Try and get in? Why would she need to try? “Maybe you’ll bum
p into ‘Mr. Operation Orgasm!’” My eyes widen.

W
hat the fuck did she just say? Who in the hell is Mr. Operation Orgasm?

My fists are clenched under the table
, and my jaw’s starting to twitch.
Shit.
Why is this even concerning me? It shouldn’t be. It really shouldn’t.

I keep my eyes on her, but when I see her looking right a
t me, I tear my gaze away again, “I don’t think so.” I hear her answer her friend, but I keep my eyes focused on the candle in the center of the table.

“She’s only eighte
en. She’s the baby of the group.” I realize the blonde’s speaking to me, and hearing what she said just makes this situation a whole lot worse. I feel my eyebrows starting to furrow and my face fall. I don’t look at her. I can’t.

“Right, eighteen huh?” The baby of the group? If the guys find out about what happened between the two of us last night, then they’re not gonna be fucking happy. Especially when they come to realize that I don’t have any intention in perusing her. The youngest of the group is always protected.
Always
. It was the same back in high school. “You seem older …” Okay, well I guess that was better than saying nothing at all.

“You want me to call you a taxi back? Or, I don’t need to go with
them. We can head back together.” I hear Neil offer, and I’m hoping he calls her a cab, or goes home with her. I don't want her to come along with us. That would just be awkward, if it can actually get any more awkward, that is.

“No, I can walk. It’s only a couple
of blocks away. You go have fun.” I glance over and see her smiling at Neil, and then notice him place his cell back down on the table. He would let her? To hell she’ll walk home alone. Is she crazy and seriously that naïve? Okay, alright. So, I let her go outside with me last night, but that was different. I know me, and I know I wouldn’t have hurt her.

“Holy fucking shit!” I almost spill my beer when Rye jumps up from his seat, knocking the chair he was sitting on to the ground with his excitement. Twisting in my seat, I see exactly why he reacted in that way. “Did you see what she just did?” He hasn’t changed, not one bit, and I smirk when I remember the things he used to do in high school. “Oh, man, she’s coming over! Damn, she’s one fine piece of …”

“Well, hi again,”
Oh shit.
“I can’t stop thinking about last week, and I swear I can still taste you.” I wince when I recognize the bra. Yeah. Let’s just say, I wasn’t exactly in the best of places last weekend. I catch the look washing across Alexis’ face when I glance over this chicks shoulder, and I’m not particularly sure why, but it bothers me. Her eyes have widened, and her lips have slightly parted. “You want me to do it again?”