Miss Jane's Undoing (3 page)

With his hat tossed to the ground and a broken branch in his hand, Tommy felt relaxed and completely at ease.  But with this sense of indolence came a return of those feelings he had been trying to hold back.  Here, in their special place, where they were shielded from prying eyes, it felt as though they were in a different world; it was a world where the usual rules didn’t apply.  Slowly, he traced the line of Jane’s foot with the branch in his hand.  She wriggled, and laughed at the sensation.  However, when the branch made its way further up, passing her knee and stroking the inside of a thigh, she started to tremble.

“Do you want me to stop?” asked Tommy, replacing the branch with his hand and stroking the inside of her thigh intently, without looking at her face.  He imagined what it would be like to remove all her clothes here, in this place, and see her resting completely nude against the grass, her hair spread out around her.  Would she tremble at his caresses, inviting them or would she shy away, finding them repulsive?  Everything depended upon her answer and Tommy looked up at her face, waiting.

Jane said nothing, just looked at him in a breathless manner which he found very arousing.  Her legs parted a little and she blushed, but she didn’t push him away.  He took this as a yes and, taking some water from the stream, he left a trail along her legs, working his way upwards.  He went no further than her trembling thighs, despite her body’s blatant invitation.  Jane’s back was arched in an effort to thrust her most vulnerable spot into his hand, but Tommy stopped his assault on her nether regions altogether and pulled her gown back down so that it reached her knees.

She lay parallel to the stream and Tommy stretched out next to her, running his wet hands along the sides of her face and her neck.  He knew that it was instinct that guided her to arch her body again and push her breasts against the lace that covered them, lifting her hips in order to get closer to him.  Tommy put his arms around her and pressed his body against hers.  Then, he started pulling the pins out of her hair.  His Jane was so sweet, so unresisting.   With her hair streaming down behind her, partly coming to the front and teasing her breasts, she looked wild and untamable.

Tentatively, at first, she returned his caresses, winding her arms and legs around his, ignoring the way her gown became crushed in the process.  Tommy removed the bit of lace covering her breasts and teased them with his fingers.  His thumbs began to stroke her nipples again, as they had the other day, and she moaned, a sound that excited him more than her willing surrender.  This time, he went even further, pushing her gown off her shoulders, exposing her to his gaze.  Jane turned her face away, blushing, and Tommy stopped touching her for a moment.  He knew that she was innocent, that he was probably the first man to see her unclothed in this manner, but he wanted to know to what extent she was willing to go for their mutual pleasure.

“Would you take off everything if I asked you to?” he asked, one finger idly stroking the underside of a breast.

Mutely, Jane nodded.

“Do it then,” he said, clearly daring her.

Trembling, Jane sat up on the grass, at first covering her breasts with one hand.  Taking a deep breath, she stopped trying to hide her semi-clad form.  Tommy watched as she lifted her dress over her head, followed it with her petticoat and finally, her chemise.  With her hair loose, she sat back down on the grass, avoided his gaze and covered herself with her hands as best she could.  He knew what it must have cost her to cast aside her feminine modesty in favor of her deeper instincts which urged her to succumb to his gentle seduction.

Tommy gently moved her hands away from her breasts and her nether regions and turned her face to look at his.  “There’s still time to stop, if you want,” he offered.

Jane shook her head.  “I don’t care about the consequences,” she said.  “I want to do this.”

Tommy removed his jacket and waistcoat, leaving him in his shirt sleeves.  Then he bent down and finally kissed Jane on her mouth, as he had wanted to do for several years.  Her naked body twined around him as she returned the kiss and Tommy felt his self-control snap.  There was no going back now.  His hands roamed furiously all over her body, cupping her breasts and her buttocks, massaging them, kissing them until Jane was wild with passion.  Then, he reached between her legs to feel the wetness and Jane panted as he amused himself by stroking her there.  He brought her to the point of orgasm, then withdrew, leaving her to cool off.  Taking some water from the stream, he covered her naked body with it, firmly running his hands around her breasts, causing them to pucker up with the sudden change in temperature.  He followed this with water on her belly and even between her legs.  Then, he placed his dripping fingers on her lips and she laughed, licking the water off them.

Suddenly, the reprieve was over and Tommy started sucking on her breasts in earnest.   Cradling her bottom with one hand, he guided the fingers of the other inside her, which caused her to cry out.  A few firm strokes and she came all over him, throwing her head back and moaning.  And her virginity was still intact.

****

Jane played the scene near the stream over in her head several times that night.  At times, she  blushed at her actions but, by and large, she was astonished at how wonderful it felt to be made love to.  Jane had thought about marital relations, of course, but her mother imparted very little wisdom to her when it came to that sort of thing.  It seemed as though most women thought it was just a chore that they had to submit to for their husbands’ sakes.  It had never occurred to Jane that lovemaking could actually be something pleasurable for
her
.  Unless, of course, she was kidnapped by a swashbuckling pirate!  But, rationally speaking, she knew that those fantasies from romance novels were just fantasies.  In reality, a swashbuckling pirate would probably be smelly, with coarse hands—nothing like well-groomed Tommy.  And yet, if he was a gentleman, wasn’t his behavior extraordinary?  Jane knew that some of her friends let their admirers kiss them and take a few more liberties, but no one admitted to going as far as she had.

Jane wondered if Tommy was experienced when it came to making love.  He seemed to  be a man of the world.  Maybe he’d had a mistress at Oxford.  Jane had heard of women of that sort—“bits of muslin” as they were called, a vulgar expression that never passed her own lips.  She hadn’t thought too much about that kind of woman but now, she wondered if she was walking a path that would lead her to that eventuality.  Although sought out by men who wanted to fulfill their sexual desires, such women were on the fringes of society, never admitted to the houses of the truly respectable.  It was a frightening thought to have come so close to losing her virginity, all for a brief moment of passion.  But that moment had surely been ecstatic and, when she looked back at it, Jane didn’t see how she could have restrained herself in Tommy’s arms.

For a few days, Jane avoided going on her usual walk.  It wasn’t that she didn’t want to meet Tommy but that she needed to sort out her own feelings.  Three years before, she could have confidently said that Tommy wasn’t the kind of man to interest her.  But now, she wasn’t so sure.  Like those romantic heroines she’d read about, she felt that she was being swept away on a tide of emotion that she couldn’t control.  She wanted to pause for a second, and figure things out, but could find no way to slow down, except to retreat altogether.  And this was what she  would do.

It was possible, she thought, that all her ruminating about the subject was for naught.  She didn’t know if Tommy still had feelings for her or if he was merely amusing himself.  What could she do to bring him to the point?  She remembered the pleasure he had taken in looking at her naked by the stream and wondered if she could convince him to fall in love with her again by invoking his desire.  She would have to be unashamed of her nudity and she’d have to resist the feminine modesty instilled in her from childhood.  However, the habit of not putting herself forward was deeply ingrained and it required a great deal of resolution for her to throw it off.  Plus, she knew that she was taking a risk because if her plan didn’t succeed, then she would have lost her virginity as well as any chance of being respectably married.  Was it worth it?

****

After the day at the stream, Tommy’s thoughts ran in a different direction.  He suffered from pangs of remorse, at once again taking advantage of Jane’s inexperience.  Despite his cool exterior and the restraint he showed, he was not unaffected by her willing submission to his desires.  While growing up, he’d fallen in love with her beauty and her strength of character, but now, he saw a new side to her he’d never suspected.  She was sensual and responsive, albeit in an innocent way.  Unlike the other women he’d been with, her pleasure in lovemaking was spontaneous, not rehearsed.  Tommy had slept with some women who thought to please him excessively by loud moaning and enthusiastic participation in the act of love, but Jane’s instinctive caresses and mild trembling with passion aroused him a great deal more.  The fact that she had trusted him enough to let things go as far as they did, spoke volumes, but Tommy knew he needed to bring up his feelings for her again before he took things any further.  Jane deserved the dignity of an engagement and marriage.  A smile crossed his lips at the thought of referring to her as Mrs. Bailey.

However, when Jane kept her distance from him for the next few days, Tommy grew unsure and agitated.  He knew that she had enjoyed herself by the stream but realized that she was no doubt regretting her actions, as improper. 
He
knew that his intentions towards her were completely honorable; he would have married her in a heartbeat if he thought that she would agree.  But did
she
know that?  Did she doubt him?  She had known him all her life.  She couldn’t possibly imagine that he was toying with her emotions.  Women, however, were irrational creatures and Tommy even knew that some of them delighted in men who treated them badly.  This was something that had been forcefully brought home to him at Oxford where the most popular young men, with the greatest number of conquests, were the ones who appeared not to care.  Tommy felt that it was beneath him to be anything other than honest; Jane would know how he felt at their next meeting, as soon as he could find the right moment to declare himself.  He threw off his diffidence and decided to do what was necessary to make her his.

****

When Tommy met Jane a few days later on the avenue, he found her in a state of anxiety which expressed itself in a manic way; she laughed and smiled and chatted away as though nothing was the matter, barely giving Tommy a chance to get a word in edgewise.  Having decided to declare himself once more, he was anxious himself, clearing his throat over and over and adjusting his cravat.  These small motions made him feel more settled, helping him build up his courage to speak his mind.  Just when he was about to proclaim his love for her again, Jane took the conversation in a different direction.

“Thank goodness it is not so warm anymore,” she said.  Then, as though struck by the memory of their last warm day together, she blushed.

“Yes, a few more of those days might have proven to be our undoing,” replied Tommy, distracted by the loveliness of her blush, especially as it spread down towards her breasts, disappearing in the lace that only partially covered her creamy skin.

  “It was quite wonderful to go to our stream again,” she declared.  I don’t know why I hadn’t been there in so long.  It is such a delightful spot.”

Tommy didn’t immediately rise to the bait.  “It’s not surprising,” he said, “that you didn’t go there after I left for Oxford.  It is hardly the kind of thing a grown young woman does, given her plentiful social appointments.  I’m sure you had far more important things to do, like attending dinner parties and balls.”

“However, the simple pleasures of nature are not above me,” said Jane.  “If Miss Fanny Price, one of my favorite romantic heroines, takes much pleasure in the beauties of nature, then surely I should follow her example.”  So saying, she turned away and started making her way towards the stream.  Tommy hesitated for a second and then followed her.  Laughing, she ran through the trees, at times even disappearing from his sight altogether.  She made it very difficult for him to restrain himself.  It had taken everything he had not to make love to her as completely as he had wanted to the last time.  The sight of her naked body trembling as he ran his wet hands over her made him want to dispense with his clothing in a trice and enter her immediately.  It was an instinctive desire that made him want to stake his claim, and mark this woman as being his.

Having lost sight of her, Tommy came to the stream to find that she was nowhere in sight.  He looked around and saw her dress lying on the grass, along with her shoes and bonnet.  And then, he saw her emerging from the stream, wearing nothing but a chemise that clung to her wet body, showing more than it covered.  Tommy was instantly hard.  However, he was determined to talk to her about his feelings before he indulged in any more lovemaking.  It wasn’t right to continue to keep her in suspense about his intentions, unless she had already assumed that he still loved her and intended to marry her.  He didn’t know what was going on in her head and so, he just waited there until she came out of the water and stood, dripping, in front of him.  Only then did he reach out and touch her smooth shoulder, glistening in the dappled sunlight.  Jane shivered a little as he drew her closer and, with no regard for his immaculate clothing, kissed her slowly, lingeringly, using his tongue to wipe away the drops of moisture that clung to her skin.