Gwen had been thinking of nothing else for the past week. “I want to be happy. I want a man to stand by me. Someone I can share my life with. I want to love him and have him love me.” She glanced down at the notebook on her desk, where she’d written those same words in a variety of ways. “I think I want him. I know I do. I’m just…”
“Afraid. Join the club.” Mia snorted. “Being a couple is hard. You know that. Being a happy couple takes work. The question you have to ask yourself is if you think Conlan is worth it.”
“He is.” She kept coming back to that conclusion.
“Then what the hell are you waiting for? If the man can overlook you being a bitch last week, grab him.”
Gwen scowled at her. “
Bitch
is a little harsh.”
“Is it? You’re threatening to take over his job. I don’t think he was harsh enough.”
“Hey. You’re my cousin. You’re supposed to be on my side.”
“I am.” Mia smiled. “And I think he’s perfect for you. Don’t screw it up.” She dragged Gwen from her desk and prodded her toward the door. “Go fix up your hair and put on some makeup. Then go get your man.”
Pumped up and knowing she had to take the chance, because if she didn’t, she’d always regret it, Gwen went willingly. Now to convince Conlan to give her another shot and pray he was more forgiving than she could have been.
Chapter Ten
Conlan sighed and stared at his current work in progress. He still had plenty of time to finish and send it off to his agent, but his heart just wasn’t in it today. Fuck it all, he missed Gwen.
He knew he’d done nothing wrong, had nothing to apologize for. The days had given him time to reevaluate his life and in particular his career. Having Gwen on board at the paper would relieve him, giving him more time to focus on his novel writing—what he’d been striving for.
It was a scary, daunting, yet exciting prospect to make that leap to full-time independent writer, part-time journalist. He had his dream job, his dream life, and hopefully, his dream girl.
Why the hell hasn’t she called me?
He checked his phone again, seeing no texts or incoming calls from Gwen. What if she decided she couldn’t risk a relationship with him? He knew well how hard it had been to recover from Ally’s betrayal. Though Gwen had said she was over her ex, hearing that he’d become engaged had to sting.
But he had to know. Could she be there for him for the long haul? Could she overcome her fears to want him more than she wanted to live a “safe” life? Heartache was a guarantee at some point when one took a chance on love. He wanted her in his life enough to risk it. Would she?
His stomach rumbled, but he had no interest in food. Lisa had told him last night over dinner he looked terrible. What a great sister, so honest.
He shook his head. “Women suck.” He needed to work that into an advice spot at some point in the near future. The “gentler sex” had men jumping all over themselves to please. And for what? A few meaningful orgasms? Some tender emotions, the ability to stroke her dark hair, stare into her big blue eyes, and know there was nowhere else you wanted to be?
“
Shit
.” He rubbed his tired eyes. So damn exhausting to constantly pine for Gwen.
The doorbell rang, and his heart raced. Probably Lisa, he told himself. Yet as he neared his door, he knew it wasn’t. He could sense Gwen standing just outside.
After calming himself as best he could and putting on his game face, he opened the door.
Gwen stood before him, wearing jeans and a sweater. And her damn glasses. God, he wanted to hug her and kiss her and never stop. He cleared his throat. “Gwen.”
She gave him a shy smile. So unlike his virtual Amazon. “Conlan.” When he just stood there soaking her in, she asked, “Can I come in? I think we should talk.”
He drew on what passed for his backbone and straightened up. “Sure. Come on in.”
She passed him, so close he caught the light, floral scent of her. Memories of inhaling her smell while he made love to her turned him hard in a heartbeat.
Once again trying to calm himself, he followed her inside and sat on the couch next to her. Close, but not close enough to touch. “Yes?”
Gwen blew out a shaky breath. The knowledge she was nervous settled him in a way he couldn’t have expected. He found himself wanting to gentle her, to protect and soothe her.
Because she’s mine.
“I appreciate that you gave me space to think things over.” At his nod, she continued. ““I just… It all hit me at once. I was scared. You and I, we’re so close, and it’s been so fast.”
“I know.”
“Then there was my job that’s changing. I run a successful blog that pays. Amazing in itself. Now we’re talking a TV spot and a newspaper column… I’m sorry for that.”
“It wasn’t—”
She cut him off. “Not my fault, I know. I didn’t ask for a byline. And if you want me to say no, I will. But I think this could benefit both of us.”
“Me more than you,” he admitted. “I’ve been wanting to focus more on my books. With you writing with me for the paper, I think it’ll be easier to get work done. And I do value you, Gwen.”
Her eyes misted. “I know. I’m sorry for freaking out on you.”
“And that was a freak-out.” He smiled. “You’re entitled.”
“I missed you.”
Before he could say the same, she threw herself into his arms and hugged him tight. The feel of her put him to rights all over. Everything was better with Gwen by his side. He buried his nose in her hair and blinked rapidly to conceal his embarrassing tears.
He kissed her head, then pulled back to see her watery eyes behind her glasses. “You know I love those frames, right?”
She laughed. “That’s why I wore them. Will you give me a second chance? Forgive me for the
Insider?
And promise we’ll do the TV spot together? Just you and me?”
“Gwen, relax. There’s nothing to forgive. I missed the hell out of you too.”
“
Good
. I thought maybe I’d really messed things up between us.”
“Not at all. I’m glad we had our first rough patch. The first of many, I’m sure.”
She smiled.
“And about the paper, I think it’s going to work out great. Look, I’m still writing my books. Truth be told, I view that as my primary gig; the column runs second. The
Insider
has plenty of reach for us both. We each do our own thing, but it’s tied together. It’s still soon, so consider this a trial run, but, baby, we have chemistry. People can see it.”
“Even though we haven’t taped our spot together yet?”
“Well, I kind of told the program manager that we’re an item, and he loves how feisty—read,
hot
—you are. So you keep wearing those cleavage-baring dresses and acting all hoity-toity. I’ll come in as the calm, dashing dude.”
“Please.”
“And we’ll make magic.”
She stared at him, and he was aware of life pushing them closer together. The sex kept getting better. And he couldn’t wait to make up with her. She knew just how to touch him, and she lavished him with attention and affection without smothering. He couldn’t have asked for a better partner. And she’d told him she loved his family, who loved her in return. His father approved wholeheartedly, and Lisa she already knew and liked.
“Gwen?” His smile faded as he saw her sobering expression. “You okay?”
“I told you I found out my ex got engaged.”
Conlan took her hands in his and squeezed. “You okay?”
Her grin widened. “I’m great. I don’t care.”
“Good.” He let out a breath. “And so you know, I had a phone call from Ally yesterday. I meant to tell you and honestly forgot. She calls me every now and then, and I just ignore her.”
“Oh.”
He watched her carefully, hoping she wouldn’t be threatened by a woman he considered an annoyance. Best to know if Gwen would be one of those insanely jealous women from the get-go. “It’s no biggie. She wants me to put her in touch with my editor in New York. Can you believe that? Seems she wrote a book of her own.”
“What did you tell her?” A slight pause. “Do you still have feelings for her?”
“Hell, no. I don’t talk to her. I can’t stand her and want nothing to do with her.”
Thank God
. “Like you,” he continued, “I honestly don’t much care about her beyond being mildly annoyed. I have no interest in getting back together with her. Ever. My heart belongs to someone else.”
When he smiled, she teared up. “Oh man. You’re going to make me say it.”
“Excuse me? Say what?”
She huffed. “I love you. Okay? I have for a while. But that doesn’t mean we’re moving in together or getting married tomorrow.”
“Fine. How about next year? If I can stand you, and you can stand that my heart belongs to the weather girl who couldn’t keep her eyes off me at the studio, I’ll—”
She pounded his chest. “You ass.”
He broke into laughter and swept her into his arms. “You know you’re the only girl for me. Like I said, I’ve got nothing but time. I’ll prove it to you.”
She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. “It’s a good thing you’re amazing in bed. Someday, those looks of yours will fade.”
“Yeah? Well, your breasts will sag.”
“Still be a handful.”
“And a mouthful,” he said with a wicked look in his eyes. “Want to spend the night here?”
“Yes. Here we don’t have to be so quiet.”
“Well, if quiet is your thing, there’s a way to keep my mouth and yours busy.”
As one, they said, “Sixty-nine.”
She grinned. “That I can do. But don’t even think of trying to weasel out of explaining that lame attempt to goad me on TV. What was that all about?”
He argued his points, and they took their passion into his bedroom, where they did their best work.
Afterward, he cuddled with her in bed. “God, Gwen. It keeps getting better.”
“I know.” She sighed. “Conlan?”
“Yeah?”
“I trust you. I mean, I really trust you. I wasn’t upset about Ally at all. A little nervous that you might still care for her, but I know you’d never cheat.”
“Never.” He hugged her until she squeaked. “Sorry. I’m just so damn happy with life. With you.”
“Me too. Happy with me, I mean.”
He tickled her, and then their touching grew more intense, and the laughter faded into moans and groans for more.
Epilogue
A year later
Dear Lovelorn,
I hear you on women being a plague on mankind. You say your wife doesn’t appreciate you. Working two jobs to make ends meet is enough of a hassle, am I right? But maybe instead of spending so much time playing Xbox on your downtime, you could try to help out around the house. Consider it foreplay. Besides, if she’s no longer busy cleaning, she could be doing other things for you. Just sayin’…
Con
Dear Lovelorn,
I’m so sorry your husband is such a moron. You’d think after telling him a dozen times—at least—that you’re more in the mood if you’re not tired from cleaning up after his ass all day, that he’d get the hint. Try leaving the house a mess, throwing on some lingerie, and tempting him from his joystick. If he can’t take the hint, let him play with himself while you go out for margaritas with the girls. Just sayin’…
Gwen
Conlan read his response, then read Gwen’s and decided to rewrite his. “Yours is better.”
“As always.” She sat in his lap and put her hands around his waist. “Truth will tell, Mr. Dawson.”
“Yes, it will, Mrs. Dawson.” He kissed his wife of ten days and sighed into her mouth. Her clever hands had found their way under his pants again, and as usual, he was stiff as a board.
“So about that bet we placed.”
He groaned. “Yeah?”
“You know, the one where you think Mia’s baby will be a boy, and I think it’s a girl?”
“Oh yeah.” He spread his legs wider and let her work him. God, he loved this woman more every day. But thank the stars she’d finally moved into his place. Handjobs were so much more fun when they didn’t have to worry about getting interrupted.
“So I say we split the difference, because she just found out she’s having twins.”
“Great.” He was primed to come. “A little more, and I’m there.”
“You’re so easy.”
“Only for you.” Before he could come, she pulled away. “Gwen,
nooo
. Don’t turn into a cock-tease just because we’re married.”
“Please. I was teasing you before we were engaged.”
“That’s true.” He sucked in a breath, then let it out on a groan. “Anything you want if you finish me.” A game they played, one where she always won. She was right; he was easy.
“Good. You have to promise to stop bugging Lisa about dating. Gavin’s still so little that he takes a lot of attention. Lisa will date when she wants to.” Aaron had moved to Portland before Gavin’s birth, and the family—Gwen included—spent as much time as they could helping Lisa and the baby. To Conlan’s relief, Lisa flourished as a single mother. And Aaron’s agreement to financially support the child while remaining distant seemed the right answer for everyone. Especially Lisa, who seemed done with him. Finally.
“Fine. Fine. Now finish me.” He wrapped her hand around him and arched into her. “No more talk about family.”
“One more thing.”
“Hell. Then I’m getting a blowjob out of the deal.”
Gwen loved sucking him off, and the woman had mad skills.
“Okay. My next sticking point, get Trent to move his ass. Mia doesn’t want to take over the bookkeeping for his second shop with the babies on the way. I know he loves her, but get him to hire someone else. He listens to you.”
“I’ll talk to the guy. He trusts her, and he wants her involved in the business. But he’s got some weird agenda about the shop that makes little sense to me.”
“Sounds good.”
His blood hummed. When she would have gotten on her knees, he stopped her. “Gwen…”
“Oh man,” she whined, though the sparkle in her eyes gave her away. “Do I have to?”
“Yes.”
She gave a fake pout, then flounced away. She returned moments later. Her breasts strained at the neckline of his favorite dress. And she wore her glasses. God, he
loved
those frames.
“No bra?” he taunted.