Missing Royal (4 page)

“Where’s the one place you’ve always been attracted to but never gone?” Valentino’s question makes me think hard.

“Every day we go riding, and where’s the first place you ride?” he adds, hinting.

“The gate?” I never really understood why I always choose to ride there. I thought I just liked the forest. The serenity of it all. Then again, I’ve always wanted to be on the other side of the gate. Always.

So it wasn’t just the mystery—it was
my world
calling me home. “So you’re saying that gate leads to another world? The one where you and I belong?” I ask, just for clarification.

He nods. I look back at my parents. “Is this for real? Are you all being serious right now?” I want to believe that this is a joke, that Mom and Dad know I’m absolutely madly in love with Valentino and brought him in on it.

“I assure you, it isn’t.” Such sadness in Valentino’s eyes as he says it.

“Then answer me one more question. Who am I?”

I see the panic in Valentino’s eyes before he looks at my parents. They both keep silent, leaving it all on him to tell me the truth. But he squares his shoulders, drops my hand, and turns to face me.

“You are Shanice Calaria, princess of Umare, daughter of Roan and Ivy.”

I want to laugh. I also want to cry some more. Did he really just say what I think he just said?

“My name is Shanice Tetreault. And princess? Did you just say I’m a princess?”

“To be specific, you are the only princess we can locate. And your world needs you to help find the other missing royals.”

I ignore his last statement, bubbling with more questions. “Who are you?”

“Princess, can we please save this for the road? We really must be going.”

“What? Now? Are you serious? I just found out, like, two seconds ago. I haven’t even processed it yet, and you want me to just up and leave?”

“I’m sorry. We have to. We must be to Avonathia before nightfall.”

He closes his eyes and breathes in. “The other world. Now I’ll leave you to your breakfast. Once you’re finished, you’ll want to go home, take a shower, and say your good-byes.” My heart sinks as he stands and walks away.

I want this all to be a joke. I
need
this all to be a joke. I wipe away my tears just as my parents wipe away theirs and we all dig in to our food. I won’t allow this to ruin my last meal with my parents. I will enjoy every minute of this.

Once it’s over, it’s over. That’s it. No more do-overs. No making up for lost time. One meal, one last good-bye. I don’t dare ask but I have a feeling that once I leave, I won’t be able to come back.

The ride home is silent, tense, almost awkward. I don’t know what to say, and clearly, neither do they. I’m afraid to speak, fearful of the tears that will pour and become unstoppable.

Even wondering if I had been adopted, I never cared to search for my birth parents. They did not raise me, they did not claim me. But now—now I don’t know what to think. A princess? My parents are royal. My father is a king and my mother a queen.

As we pull into the driveway I grab my jewelry box, holding it a little more tenderly now, understanding the true significance.

“This … ” I have to take a breath. “You picked this because it was fit for a queen. That wasn’t just a metaphor, was it?” I bite my lower lip, unable to control my emotions.

“No.” mom says.

“We wanted to send you home with a little something from us. Something to remind you of home. This,
our
home. We vowed to take care of you, Shanice. We promised to let you go just the same. It isn’t easy for us but at least we know we did all we could for you.” Dad finishes.

The pain that wells inside me is too much to bear. I can’t take this good-bye.

“What if I don’t want to go? What if I’m not ready? This right here—this is the life I want.” I open my arms toward them. They both pull me into their grasps.

“Oh, Shanice, I wish it were up to any of us. But we all know you’re not really happy here. Your life is empty of so many things you desperately need. Your life is much greater than this. You’re royal, whereas we are just two people. In your world, we would be commoners. And just as much as we want to keep you as our own forever, think of how your parents, your
true
parents, want you there.” She’s stronger than I could’ve ever imagined.

“Mom, I don’t need friends. Not more than I already have. And no one is worth more than another. Not even royalty. And I’m not ready to be royal. It may have been a wish upon the stars as a young girl but now? Now I want no part in it. And my parents gave me up long ago. That was their choice, and as such, my staying would only be the consequence of that.” I need to make her see my view on this.

I know she doesn’t want me to go, so why should she force me to leave?

“My dear, dear, child. You are wise. It is true—royalty is not worth more. But you are living a life filled with nothing when you could be living a life with everything. And you know well that your parents did not willingly let you go. They asked for our help in order to protect you. Now your world is what needs protecting, and it has called upon you for help. As much as it hurts, as much as it will always affect you, you must be brave. You must live up to your full potential. While you’re here, friendless and fighting for this life, you have no idea what you’re missing in the life you should be living.”

I dry my tears on my sleeve. I soak in every word as I fill my lungs with the cool air of January. “You’re right. But it doesn’t mean that I won’t miss what I have here. And I’m not ready to leave yet.”

“Come on. You should take a shower, and then I’ll help you pack your things.” She leads me inside the house. I allow it. As suggested, I take a shower.

I let the water roll over me, warming me, helping me relax. But every time I think of what is to come once I leave the safety of this shower, more tears begin to spill.

And I don’t stop them. I let them all free. Everything hurts. My chest aches. I can’t say I don’t look forward to seeing beyond the gate and even perhaps spending more time with Valentino but I don’t want those things to come at the cost of leaving behind the only life I’ve ever known.

“Shanice.” Knocking at the door pulls me from my pity fest. “It’s time, honey.” I nod, aware she can’t see me. I wrap a towel around me as I step out of the shower. Slowly I brush the tangles from my hair and braid it back once again. I dress and leave the bathroom, knowing it’s the last time I’ll ever use it.

I go to my room and begin digging through my belongings. I start with my closet, flinging all my clothes on the bed. All my shoes are pushed into the middle of the room. I dump every drawer out and rummage through every paper and book.

I grab my journal, only a single entry inside it. I set it on the floor away from everything else. With it, I put the embroidered napkin and the jewelry box with my birthday present. I throw my favorite riding boots beside those. I go back to my closet and riffle through all my camping gear, grabbing the first aid kit and a lighter which I slip into my pocket.

“You can’t take much. Once there, you will wear the clothes they give you, you will be trained to live as they do, taught to act as they do, and they will not want anything from this life lingering to keep you stuck in the past.” Valentino stands in my doorway, still looking sad.

“Some things I’m not leaving without. If they have a fit about it, too bad for them.” I don’t mean to take out my frustration on him. I just want to make it clear I’m not leaving everything behind. Not everything.

I grab the family photo from my desk, still in its wood frame. They want me to forget but they better realize that I will never allow that to happen. I can’t and I won’t. These two people have taken care of me since day one, and I won’t allow this new life to destroy all my good memories.

“Can I ask you a question?” I turn back to Valentino. I am so afraid to ask this but if I don’t know, I may never get another chance.

“Of course.” He takes a step closer.

“In the past, you have gone to ask me things and then changed your mind. Were any of those times due to the fact that I am a princess?”

“Sometimes. More because we can’t date—not in the traditional sense, anyway—and my task is to be your friend. If I mess with the plans awaiting you, they could have me killed.” I didn’t know it possible but he seems to grow sadder.

“So you’re saying that if things weren’t like this, you would’ve asked me out?” My heart skips a beat, and I know it’s silly but I’ve been in love with him for a long time. And once we return home, I don’t know that I’ll see him again. I hope so but I just don’t know what to expect.

“Only every day.” He smirks. I hold back for two seconds before I make the craziest move of my life. I kiss him. Eyes closed, hands in his hair, my lips to his. And he doesn’t push me away. He kisses me back.

But the growl from behind Valentino has us two steps away from each other like it never happened. I look up to find the man I’ve always called Dad watching Valentino like a hawk. I may be leaving but I’m still his little girl, I suppose.

“May I have a minute with my daughter?”

Valentino nods and steps into the hall. Dad closes my bedroom door and sits on my chair. “Whatever happens, know that we will always care about you. We will always love you. And if you ever find your way here again, know our door is open to you.”

My lip quivers. I can’t speak. I can’t keep from crying.

“Thank you, Dad.” I wrap my arms around him and lean my head on his shoulder. This may be my last chance to call him that. To ever call
anyone
that, if I think about it. How do I address my royal parents? Father? Mother? Your Majesty? I try not to worry about it for now.

“Shanice? Be safe. Take care of yourself. Your mother and I made sure you knew everything you would need to know where you’re going. None of it was silly or something you won’t use. We wanted to know you were as prepared as possible before leaving. I hope we succeeded in that.”

“You did. And I will never stop thinking of you and Mom. You will always be Mom and Dad to me.” I kiss his cheek.

“As you will always be our daughter.” He kisses the top of my head.

“Is this it?” I look up at him, my lip quivering.

“It is. The time has come.” I wrap my arms around him.

“Where’s mom?” I whisper – not ready.

“Your mother can’t take the good-byes. This is a moment she’s dreaded for seventeen years. Letting you go is the hardest thing either of us have had to endure. Just promise me that you’ll never lose the little bit of us you have.” I nod and let him go. I scoop up the few things I’ve gathered and dump them in my backpack. The boots, I slip on my feet. I won’t be taking my tennis shoes.

I only wish I had more warning so I could have said a proper good-bye, maybe more time to save up the items I would want most, things I know won’t be there, the place they keep calling my home.

We walk to the stables. A walk I’ve made a thousand times, most of them with Valentino at my side. Always offering to walk me home, always making sure I’m safe. Feelings of unease and fear overcome me.

I don’t know what I’m walking into. Part of me still wants to believe this is some kind of sick joke. The other part of me knows it isn’t, and there isn’t a thing I can do to change it.

My company isn’t any help. He just walks beside me, silent and moody. He hasn’t said a thing since I kissed him. Since
we
kissed. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not. I just hope it didn’t ruin everything—I can’t lose the only friend I’ve ever had. He can’t leave me once we get there. I don’t know what I would ever do to forgive myself if that’s the case.

Once we arrive at the stables, my panic rises. This is it. Down to ten minutes before we reach that gate. We enter the stable doors and Valentino immediately begins saddling Knight.

“Are we taking the horses?” I look toward Star, hoping she’s coming with me.

“There’s a reason why it took so long for her to like you,” Valentino says in reply. I take that as a yes. Apparently she isn’t from here to begin with. I suppose it makes sense. Send me a friend, send me a horse, and now all I need is the medieval gown, the tiara, and a sword to strap around my waist—as I see Valentino doing.

I almost laugh. He seriously does have a sword. And two rolls of fabric. From all the camping I’ve done in the past, I’m assuming those are bedrolls. “Here. Strap this to the back of your saddle.” He tosses the second one to me. A very small bedroll of one blanket.

I have a feeling this trip isn’t going to be one of comfort. I throw Star’s saddle over my shoulder and put it on her back, careful to do up all the straps properly before tying my bedroll to the saddle.

“This is yours. Your true moth-”

“My true mother? Is the one I’m leaving behind. So if you mean the other one, I suggest you call her by name or call her my birth mother.” I don’t mean to lash out. But the mother I’m leaving behind is the mother who raised me – not the mother I’m going back to.

Valentino blinks and lets me get it out before finishing what he was saying. “Sent it so you could return in proper clothing.” I turn around to look at the gown hanging from Valentino’s fingers. It’s stunning, and the green fabric matches the necklace and earrings my parents gave me.

I take the dress. “Am I supposed to wear this while riding a horse?” I ask in disbelief.

“Not right now. You can wear your regular clothes until we get to the closest towns and villages. After that you’ll need to change.”

I nod, not really taking in what he’s saying. I don’t think I can handle anymore shockers. I am about to wad the dress up but Valentino takes it from me and carefully folds it into a case that he straps to his own saddle.

“Come on. Grab your backpack and let’s go. We need to make camp before it gets dark but we need to ride for a couple of hours at least if we hope to make it home before the ball.”

“What ball? And how long of a ride is it once we’re past the gate?” I can hear the panic in my own voice.

“The ball for your birthday. And it’s at least a couple of days’ ride. We will have to rough it for a few days at least. This is why we must reach a good spot to make camp before dark tonight. Come on.” He rides Knight out of the stables, and I follow after.

We don’t race like usual. No games or laughing. Just silence as we ride through the trees and toward the gate, the one place I’ve always wanted to go. The one place I wish I was never going. The one place I can’t avoid.

We arrive at the gate far too soon. I begin shaking. My hands tremble as I fidget with the reins. My entire body is tense. I’m not sure what terrifies me the most about this whole scenario but one thing I know for sure—this is real. It isn’t a joke set up by my parents. This isn’t just a dream that’s about to end.

Everything I know is behind me. And all that lies ahead is a life I’m not ready for. People wait for me because they love me, they claim me as their own but I do not know them. It’s like my whole life is spent walking along a cliff. One more surprise, one last push, and I’ll go over.

I don’t know who I am anymore. I don’t know much of anything. I’m walking into the unknown with someone I thought I knew but don’t really know at all. Each haunting thought fills me as we approach the gate. I desperately long to turn around and run now while I still can.

“My dear Shanice, please be comforted and know that you are being watched over. No harm will befall you at this time. Feel peace, my daughter.”
The haunting voice of my mother, the one who beckons me, overcomes my senses. And where it terrified me before, now her voice is soft and comforting.

I feel the peace she sends and as scared as I am, as much as I don’t want to go, I make it to the gate and continue riding as it opens with one loud squeal. Valentino allows me to enter first. Perhaps he can tell how much I feel like running right now and knows I won’t make it through on my own.

But I nudge Star forward, sobbing uncontrollably. Five steps in and I pull on the reins. I turn around in the saddle and watch the gate close. More racking sobs overtake me as my past is sealed behind me by a hauntingly beautiful gate.

I hear the crunching of twigs as Valentino approaches me. I don’t bother looking up or even around me. I don’t want to be here. “Hey.” He puts his hand on my leg to get my attention. His voice is soft, welcoming. “Come here.” I look down at him. He drops Knight’s reins and grabs my waist.

I throw my leg over Star, and he takes me by the waist and lowers me to the ground. He wraps his arms around me and holds me to his chest, allowing me to cry on him. I hadn’t realized how cold I felt until I’m in the shelter of his arms.

He plays with the end of my braid, whispers into my hair, tells me it will be all right. “You’re home now. And no matter what, you’ll always have me.” I relax into him, letting my arms loop around his waist.

We stand there for ten minutes before my tears have run dry. I straighten, despite not wanting to move away from him at all, and wipe away the last few tears. “Thank you.” It’s all I can say. He nods, taking a step closer, and intertwines my fingers with his.

“Look around you. It may not be feel like home right now but your mother was right. There is so much more for you here.” I turn to look toward our path. Trees surround us but he must’ve planned exactly where to stop because directly ahead, there is one perfect shot of the setting sun, illuminating the speck of a castle we’re headed toward.

And it is beautiful. The view is stunning, and though the weather is cool, I do feel comfortable. Perhaps one day I will call this place my home but right now, that word is reserved for a place I won’t ever see again.

“We need to get going.” He tugs on my hand. I turn back to him but don’t follow. He doesn’t let go but comes back to me.

“Thank you for everything.” I stand on my tiptoes and place a gentle kiss on his cheek. As I stand back, he almost looks like he wishes to return that kiss. But his sense of duty must get the better of him as he pulls me toward Star.

I mount on my own and wait for him to do the same before he leads me back onto the path and under the darkness of the forest. Very little light can get through the foliage. It’s kinda terrifying but I’ve always trusted Valentino, and I can’t let that change now.

“Who are you?” I realize that in all the rush to leave, he never did answer me.

“Valentino Audric.” By the distinct way he avoids answering my real question, I have a feeling there is more to it. I push Star to catch up with him so we’re riding side by side.

“I know that. So who are you here?” I won’t stop asking until he begins answering. They sent him to be my friend, someone I could be friends with in both worlds. Who would fit that profile in a world like this?

“Valentino, son of Palamides,” He looks me in the eye before turning back to the road. “King Palamides.” I’m at a loss for words. He looks like the perfect Prince Charming to me.

“I don’t understand. If they needed me to come find the other royals, where do you fit in? Why do they need me at all? Shouldn’t you be able to find them?” I realize how rudely those words could be taken but I don’t know of any other way to ask.

“It isn’t just about finding the others, Shanice. Not for you. And you aren’t the only one going to find them. We’re going together.” It doesn’t really answer my question but it’s a start.

“Why else am I here?”

“Because this is your home.”

I want to argue that point but for now, I let it go. “So why treat me as if I am above you? We are equals, yet you call me Princess, and you said we couldn’t date—we can’t be more than friends. Why not?”

“Because that’s how things work. You are betrothed, I am betrothed, and like it or not, our world is not the same as the one you grew up in. It’s going to be hard and it won’t always be fun but you’re going to have to adjust to this world and all its rules.” He says we’re both betrothed as if it pains him.

Makes me wonder if he knows who he’s betrothed to. Makes me wonder who
I’m
betrothed to. Whoever he is, I hope he’s okay with me breaking it off. I will marry for love—
that
I know for sure.

“Do you know her?” Can’t hurt to ask.

“No. As I said, we’re the only two left. Aside from my father and your parents. There are others but they all died or went missing when Mendina attacked their kingdoms. It will be our job, our task, to find them all. And if we can’t find them, we have to find out what happened to them. That isn’t even the hard part of our task.”

“Oh? What is?”

“Convincing them to help us destroy Mendina once and for all.” His voice is darker as he says those words. He is bitter and angry at her.

“Who is Mendina?”

“Trust me—you don’t want to get into that conversation right now. For now, I think we’d better make camp. It’s too dark to continue traveling tonight.” I follow after him as he turns off the path and into the trees.

He leads me to a small clearing, perfect for a campfire and some sleeping bags—or blankets, in this case. I wish I had thought to bring a tent. I jump off Star and follow Valentino’s example, tying the reins to a tree post, removing the saddle, gathering sticks for a fire.

I wait until Valentino has walked far enough away that he won’t notice and then I build up the sticks and pull out my lighter to start the fire. I didn’t come completely unprepared. I just know Valentino will disapprove of my bringing the lighter from home.

As soon as the fire is going, I put the lighter in my pocket and continue building a rock walk around the fire to keep it contained. It’s Camping 101, except you usually have the rocks in place before the fire is lit. I just couldn’t risk Valentino coming back and seeing me using the lighter.

I begin brushing the ground with my foot, making sure there are no rocks or anything worse where I have to sleep. The few things I do find are brushed away easily. Without waiting for Valentino to return, I lie down on the one blanket given to me.

Though the trees provide a protective cover from the wind, chills still get through and bring out the goose bumps on my skin. The air is growing colder, and I have a feeling it’s going to be a long night. I curl up into a ball, hoping that will somehow warm me up.

“It helps if you put the blanket on top of you.” Valentino chuckles. If he wasn’t so adorable doing it, I might’ve been mad at him. I sit up and realize he has wood in one arm and a bucket of water in the other.

“How far did you go to get the water?” I hadn’t realized he was gone so long.

“It’s ten minutes that way. Just a little stream. Good for water to drink but not enough for a bath.” I hadn’t thought of that.

I lie back down and watch him work, putting the wood in a nice neat pile beside the fire so he can feed it in as needed. The bucket of water is set on top of the fire to warm it. I assume that means he’s making supper for us.

I don’t know that I can stomach food. Everything that happened today comes crashing back down on me and I feel despair, like before. I wonder what my parents are doing right now. Sitting at home reading? Crying? Maybe it was all a lie and they’re glad I’m gone.

I wonder what they told the school and all those who knew me. I didn’t call them my friends but still, people will ask questions if for nothing more than to spread gossip. I wonder what the teachers will think. I think of all the people I so desperately wanted to be friends with. Will they even notice I’m gone?