Missing (The Brannock Siblings Book 3) (11 page)

I smiled to myself. This whole not cooking well thing wasn't
as bad as I thought. It was fun to tease her, but she still tried, and that's
all anyone could ask for. Right? Plus, I could cook for the both of us.

That thought made my stomach roll, but not with nausea or anxiety.
All the women I had been with in the past were nothing now. They weren't even a
memory. I hadn't seen a future with one woman in all of my 30 years. Until now.

I
wanted
it. With her.

 

Chapter 5

Aiden

After that Sunday night of pizza, the best brownies she had
ever tasted, and a couple hours of her favorite show sitting next to Fergus
Brannock, Aiden thought the whole thing had been a dream. She had never had so
much fun just staying in and gorging herself on junk food. Gus kept up a steady
stream of commentary on the show and Aiden found herself falling over with
laughter at some of the things he said.

There was nothing funny about the show. In fact, it was a
very serious competition for those involved. Some didn't make it far, but they
had spent every day of their lives over the last year or so before the
competition training and focusing on the end goal of finishing the obstacles
with a decent time. It hurt sometimes to watch because the strength needed for
some of the challenges was ridiculous. She knew without a doubt she couldn't
force herself to get to that level of physical condition and accomplish
something like American Ninja Warrior. Hence, the pizza and brownies - and beer
thanks to Gus running to his place before the show started. He had adamantly
told her that she didn't need to train like that to look like she was in shape
and instead of taking it as a compliment, she ignored him. He was already
proving to be quite the charmer and she couldn't handle it.

No matter how serious she got, however, Gus easily pushed
the mood where it needed to be between the two of them. It was exactly what the
last few months had been like whenever they had spoken over the phone. Never in
a million years did she think it could be even better, especially after their
recent discovery about each other. But it
was
better.

Gus was better than Dreamy could have ever been and it
scared the hell out of her. Friends she could do, but she was finding that it
might not be enough.

It was baffling to realize that after all they had shared,
they still didn't know a damn thing about each other. All the details that
hadn't seemed so important at the time were now the reasons why she found it so
hard to move forward. His job being the biggest obstacle.

Over the next week, she only saw Gus once or twice during
the day and it was usually a quick "Hey, how's your day going?" and
that was it. Work kept him busy and she stayed occupied trying not to paint the
things he inspired in her. Those blue and grey eyes were all she saw when she
stared at a blank canvas, his smile was all she could think about when she went
to bed, when she woke up. To think that just over a week ago, she was plotting
ways to take out her revenge on him, only to now find herself plotting ways to
just see him.

It was turning into a mess of a problem and it didn't help
that Lily was constantly asking about him and begging her to delete her profile
from the dating site and just go for it with Gus.

When Aiden walked away at the restaurant that night, she
thought that would be it. It was over. No more late night talks with a man she
was dying to meet in person, no more hostile witty banter with her handsome
detective neighbor. She had been sure that the course of her life would have
shifted. Instead, she found that there was a reason they stayed clueless until
that perfect moment.

There was a reason she had hated him so much in those months
after she moved in. The line between love and hate couldn't
be
any
thinner. She couldn't say that she loved him, but there was no way in hell she
could say that she hated him anymore.

It was Sunday night once more and she'd had no luck finding
a studio. Her apartment was practically overflowing with paintings that she
could never put on sale because they were too personal. She sold four more
pieces at a local auction during the week and made enough to maybe look for a
nicer studio than she had originally planned.

She was going over the ads in the paper when a thud on her
door gave her a welcomed interruption. She glanced at the clock and realized
that she only had twenty minutes to start her pizza and brownies before her
show started.

She hurried to the door and peeked through the peep hole.
Her gasp was loud enough to be heard through the door. How did she know this?
Because Gus' smile widened as she stared at him through the tiny distorted
window.

Willing her blush away, she slowly opened the door, looking
up at him through her lashes. He shifted on his feet, eggs and a bottle of oil
in his hands and an anxious expression, as if he wasn't sure he was welcome.

Smart man, because
she
wasn't even sure about it. She
may have made certain discoveries about her feelings for him, but that didn't
mean she was willing to address those discoveries out loud or by any kind of
action on her part.

Instead of smiling back like she wanted to and welcoming him
inside to obviously share another night of their show, she decided to take the
sassy route he appreciated so much.

"Can I help you, Fergus?"

His smile went crooked, like a smirk, but sweeter. "Red.
Good to see you."

Knowing his reasoning for calling her Red, the smile she had
been fighting broke through. She drew in a breath and blew it out on a
"Sorry."

He shrugged and lifted his hands. "Brought the
ingredients just in case. I also have a pizza in my freezer and a six pack if
you need it. Saw the shelf full of brownie mixes in your pantry last week so I
figured you didn't need any back up."

God, help me.

If he got any cuter, she wouldn't need brownies to soothe
her sweet tooth. She stepped back and gestured for him to enter. "Let's
get started then."

 

***

Gus had not only become a friend over the next couple weeks,
but an ever present part of her life. They didn't see eye to eye on a lot of
things and ended up arguing more than not, but it always resulted in one or
both of them laughing until they couldn't breathe. Something she had only ever
had with her sister when they were teenagers. Surprising? Yes, but that's the
kind of relationship her and Lily cherished and she prayed nothing ever happened
to change that.

With Gus, it was better, sweeter, and starting to tug on her
heart a whole lot harder.

He had been working more often and had even gone through a
few cases, which he grudgingly kept to himself, so Aiden didn't see him as
often as she would have liked. It helped that he made up for it by coming over
every Sunday night and stopping by to say hi whenever he was home.

He never pushed for more than just hanging out together.
Sure, there were some tense moments when she was sure he wanted to kiss her,
but he never did. The problem wasn't that he
didn't
kiss her, it was the
amount of disappointment she felt every time he stepped away. She couldn't
explain it, didn't want to even try, but it was there. Always there.

Lily was no help either; always asking about him, always
asking how she felt. Her case was getting weaker by the day and Lily no longer
acknowledged her argument that she couldn't be with a man who had a dangerous
job. No matter how many ways Aiden tried to push it, she always lost to Lily.

She attempted to start conversations with a couple of men on
the dating site, but none of them seemed normal. Their first question was a
request for her picture. Why she didn't feel comfortable with that, she had no
idea. Knowing it was possible to start up a friendship without pictures, her
standards were set high and it was going to be a battle to change it.

She was starting to think the whole situation was a losing
battle anyway because a piece of her heart tore off each time she was with Gus
and she wasn't getting them back. He remembered every detail she ever told him
over the phone, every movie she liked or song she couldn't get out of her head
whenever she heard it. He started digging further, too. Almost as if it was his
life's mission to find out everything about her.

And she couldn't help but do the same.

It was a Saturday morning when she was leaving her apartment
to inquire about some space for a studio. It was the only place that hadn't
already been taken by the time she called. Probably because it wasn't in the
best part of town, but it would have to do for now. The rent was cheap and she
was desperate to clear out her apartment. Her already small space felt tinier
and tinier surrounded by all the canvases and supplies. Gus never said anything
about the mess, he just browsed through her paintings and complimented her
often on them.

She knew she was good, but hearing you were good from that
one person whose opinion you never thought mattered, but ended up mattering
more than anyone else's; it's momentous. Like the feeling you get the moment
you walk into a room full of people and the man who holds your heart finally
looks up and sees you.
Really
sees you. You become the only two people
in the room because everything and everyone else disappears.

That's what it felt like every time Gus found her, every
time he smiled at her.

She shook his image from her mind and headed for the stairs
until she saw Gus coming up the last flight to their floor. He looked worn out
and stressed, and for the first time in a long time, she didn't think about
herself or her issues or her family.

He was all she could see.

"Hey, you okay?"

He lifted his head, not noticing she was there until that
moment, and his expression warmed, his eyes brightening slightly and the slump
of his shoulders disappearing. She didn't want to read too much into it, but
she felt a sputter in her chest whenever he looked at her like that. Whenever
seeing her so obviously made his day a little bit better.

"Yeah, Aid. I'm good. Just tired."

Lie. He was a horrible liar. Just as bad as she was.
"You want to talk about it?"

He met her at the top of the stairs and stood in her space,
filling her senses with him. She didn't make any effort to get some distance.
She didn't want it.

"You look like you're heading out."

She shrugged and looked down at her feet, kicking at an
imaginary spot on the floor. "And
you
look like you could use a
listening ear."
What am I doing? I shouldn't be doing this.

"I don't want to interrupt your day."

Not knowing why it was so easy, but the decision to forget
about the dump she was about to go see was made in the next second and she
didn't feel even a moment of regret.

"I don't have anything going on. At least, not
anymore."

He reached out and lifted her chin with his finger when her
stare still didn't leave the floor. His tired eyes gazed down at her and she
felt the connection between them brighten. That familiar hum that covered her
body whenever he touched her. Those eyes darkened as they locked on hers.

Oh, yes. He felt it, too.

"I know you found a place, babe. Lily told me yesterday
when she came to get Aidy."

He had called her 'babe' several times before, but each and
every
time it made her feel like she was about to melt to the floor in a giant
puddle. He couldn't know how the endearment affected her. If he did, it could
only be assumed that he loved to torture her and she would continue to let him.
She drew in a deep, cleansing breath before she finally spoke. "I suddenly
don't even want to see the place. It's in a shitty part of town anyway so I'm
better off without it."

He studied her face for several seconds then dropped his
fingers away from her chin and clasped her hand in his. "I've been wanting
to talk to you about that for a while now. Come on."

She followed him inside his apartment and dropped her purse
on the counter when he released her hand. Every time she saw the bare walls and
sparse furnishings, she felt a brief moment of bewilderment. His personality
wasn't nearly as empty as this place.

When he shrugged off his jacket and tugged his tie loose,
she watched him closely. He always looked so comfortable in his own skin, and
every effortless movement made her mouth go dry. His shoulder holster was
strapped on and his badge was clipped to his belt. Never before had she thought
that a cop could look so sexy, but he did. He looked like a man with a purpose
in this life.

"I have a place that I use as storage," he stated
and gestured for her to sit with him at the table. "I recently cleaned it
out and there is plenty of room for you to set something up, lots of space to
store your paintings, too."

"I'm sorry?"

"I think it would be more useful as a studio for you
than storage for me. It's right across the street."

"Gus, I couldn't take-"

"It's just a suggestion, Aiden. I didn't think it would
take you so long to find a place and I would rather you not end up going
somewhere that you aren't safe."

She hated accepting help for
anything
. Especially
when it came to her painting. She had purchased everything on her own, found it
on her own; did everything she could
on her own
. But he was right and
she hated to admit it. His concern for her safety wasn't really a surprise, but
it grated on her already frazzled state for unknown reasons. He wasn't supposed
to care so much.

"I'll think about it."

He nodded and grasped her hand once more. "You're a
good friend, Aiden. I was an ass and I want to make it up to you."

"Gus-"

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