Moment of Weakness - The Esquire Girls Series - Hailey (Book 1) (4 page)

Chapter 8

“Hey Cowgirl.” I look up from my smartphone and come face to face with the cute security guard just outside the doors of the office building as I’m climbing the few stairs leading to the building. His jacket is zipped all the way up and he’s got his messenger bag slung across his body. It looks like his shift just ended.

“Hi,” I say in a small voice before bringing my attention back to my phone. I feel a tingle in the pit of my stomach and I have to remind myself that, although this guy may be cute, he’s not what I’m looking for.

He pulls the door open for me. “After you, m’lady,” he says gallantly as he follows me inside.

“Thanks.”  I try to speed up but he’s hot on my heels as I unbutton my jacket and stuff my scarf into my handbag.

“Wait up!”

I pull in a deep breath as I turn to face him. “Yes?”

“I never got your name.” He gives me that charming, boyish smile of his.

For a brief second, I consider lying or giving him an excuse to get him off my back. Finally, I say, “Hailey.”

“
Hailey
.” I like the way my name sounds coming out of his mouth. “I’m Jackson,” he says, stretching his massive hand out to me.

I try to suppress a smile but I can’t. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Jackson.”

He reaches for my hand. I’m forced to slow down. He brings the back of my fingers to his lips for a soft kiss. “The pleasure is all mine, Hailey,” he says with his unrelenting smile.

He’s cheesy as hell. So, why am I grinning so hard?

I gently pull my hand from his grasp and recommence my trek towards the elevators.

Jackson is hot on my heels. “So, what else are you gonna tell me about yourself,
Hailey
?”

I glance at my watch.

7:26 p.m.

“Well, for starters, I work at the law firm on the 7
th
floor…and I’m
late
.” This morning, Matt emailed to ask me to come by the office after class today. He’s expecting the client, Charles DuBois, around 7:30 – a bit late for a client meeting, but when you’re Charles DuBois, you say ‘jump’ and your lawyer says ‘how high?’.

My answer doesn’t deter Jackson. “How ‘bout you tell me what time you finish tonight and I’ll pick you up to go get a drink?”

I lift an eyebrow at him. “Your shift is over. You’re going home.”

He shrugs. “True. But it’s not like I have plans tonight. I don’t mind coming back here to meet up with you.”

I hit the elevator call button before I turn back to face him. “Look, Jackson – you’re a really nice guy, but I’m not interested,” I say as diplomatically as I can.

His expression deflates for just a second and then that big ole smile comes right back. “All I asked you to do was to have a drink with me. I didn’t propose marriage. C’mon! I’m new in town and I don’t know anybody. Show me a good time, Cowgirl!”

His offer seems innocent enough but the last thing I want is to get caught up with a guy like him. If I wanted a cowboy, I would have stayed in Texas.

The elevator door slides open and I step on. “Good night, Jackson.”

He sticks his hand out to hold the door open. “We can just be friends, y’know. Even if I’m not your type – we can be friends.” With that, he lets the door slide shut.

I feel a pang of guilt wrench my chest. After all, this guy
did
save my butt when I got mugged. It probably wouldn’t hurt to have a drink with him.

I quickly shake the thought from my head. I can’t focus on that right now. I’m here to see Matt. I take a quick glance at my reflection in the mirrored panel of the elevator. I run my hands through my hair and blot the sheen from my nose. I feel like I’m on the verge of making a deeper connection with him.

Maybe after the Charles DuBois meeting tonight, something might happen between me and Matt.

Who knows?

Chapter 9

When I get to the 7
th
floor, it was already 7:33. Being a few minutes late shouldn’t be a big deal, but I know that Matt will be pissed. He enjoys being tough on me.

I think it’s an aphrodisiac for him.

Instead of knocking, I slowly crack open the door to conference room three, hoping naively to enter unnoticed and cause the least amount of disturbance to the meeting that I expect is already under way.

But I’m hardly prepared for what I see splayed across the conference room table when I tiptoe in.

My voice gets trapped in my throat. I pull in a loud, air-sucking gasp.

I just stand there with my hand on the doorknob. I can’t think. I can’t move. And I sure as hell can’t pick my jaw up from the floor.

Matt’s custom-tailored suit jacket has been discarded in a heap on the floor. His premium silk tie is in a ball in the corner of the room. His designer trousers are down around his ankles. His perfectly-sculpted ass thrusts hard and fast into the woman on the table, her tiny feet digging into his back.

She glances past his shoulder and sees me. Her face registers with panic.

It’s Anna-Maria. His secretary. On the table. Completely naked.

“Stop. Stop. Matt, stop,” she hisses frantically as she pushes him with all her strength.

He seems dazed and unable to comprehend her sudden change in mood.

Seemingly incapable of constructing a coherent sentence, she points at me as she jumps off the table and scrambles around for clothes to cover her painfully perfect body.

Matt turns and he finally sees me.

The look on his face is one of mild surprise.

Not shame. Not guilt.

The bastard doesn’t even have the decency.

He bends and pulls up his pants at a leisurely pace.

“The client cancelled the meeting,” he says nonchalantly tossing a quick, disinterested glance at Anna-Maria who is scrambling around the room, picking up her clothes. “I sent you an email.”

“Oh.” That’s the only word that comes out of my mouth. I’m still frozen in place. My arms, my legs – they refuse to move. I feel a hot burning in the center of my chest.

I thought tonight would be
our
night. I thought it would be the night that Matt and I take our fling to the next level.

I was wrong.

Anna-Maria can’t bring her eyes to mine as she slips by me and shrivels out of the room.

The hypocrite.

It hasn’t even been a week yet since she tried to shame me for allowing Matt to seduce me. Now, I find her naked and panting underneath him.

I bring my attention back to Matt. He’s now at the bar in the corner of the room pouring himself a drink. He takes one big gulp, finishing off the contents of his glass. He looks over at me. “Anyway, I won’t be needing your services tonight.” His words cut me deep. I feel so cheap. I’m not sure that he realizes how I’m interpreting what he just said to me. He tosses a handful of peanuts into his mouth before he begins slowly buttoning his shirt. “You can go.”

I don’t say a word.

I can’t.

I back out of the room and get myself to the elevator as quickly as my body will take me.

Chapter 10

“I wanna come hooommmeeee,” I wail into the phone as I sit in my bed, clutching my duvet to my chest.

“Shhhh shhh shhh,” my best friend, Kimberly, says in her most soothing voice. “Calm down, Hailey Bear. Calm down. It’ll be okay.”

I blot my eyes with a handful of tissues. “No, it won’t,” I cry helplessly. “I gave my – my body to him. I let him see my – my body – And he doesn’t give a damn about me.” I can barely string a sentence together between my sniffles. “And now – I have to see him at work everyday – knowing that I gave him my body and he doesn’t want me – I want to come
home
.”

“Hailey – listen to me. You made a mistake. That’s all it was. That guy is a jerk. It’s his loss. You’re a fantastic, beautiful girl.” Kimberly is trying her best to console me but I feel so broken right now that I can’t even process what she’s saying.

“Do you think it’s because I’m fat, Kimmy? Is that why he doesn’t like me?”

I hear her sigh into the phone. We’ve had this particular conversation a million times.

Is it because I’m fat? Is that why Ricky Freeman didn’t ask me to the prom?

Is it because I’m fat? I that why that guy in my Contract Law class never asked me out?

Is it because I’m fat?

“No, Hailey. It’s not because you’re fat. You’re not fat. It’s because he’s a loser. There’s nothing you can do about that, except maybe take his name to the lord in prayer.”

I know she didn’t say it to be funny, but that comment gets me to laugh. She chuckles a bit too although she was dead serious about me getting down on my knees and praying that god save Matt’s dark, ugly soul from eternal damnation.

My sobbing calms a bit. “I feel like my heart is broken into a million tiny little pieces,” I say weakly.

“You’re stronger than you realize, Hailey Bear. Remember that. Always remember that.”

Chapter 11

I’ve decided that I won’t be having sex with Matt anymore.

Obviously.

But it’s still hard to stop thinking about him. And it’s impossible to not feel hurt.

That’s why I decided to work today, on Thanksgiving Day. I need to keep busy in order to keep myself from obsessing over how stupid I was to give my body to a man who doesn’t respect me. I spend the day at my cubicle reviewing recent tech startup jurisprudence in an attempt to distract myself.

By 9:45, I’m exhausted and starving. I slip into my coat and grab my purse. It’s time to go home.

When I step off the elevator in the lobby, Jackson is alone at the security desk. My heels click loudly as I make my way to the front door.

Jackson looks up from the book that he’s reading. A wide smile spreads across his face. “Hey Cowgirl!” he says with his usual charm.

“Hey Tough Guy,” I say, slowing my pace just a bit.

“How come you’re working on Thanksgiving?” He puts down his book and rounds the security desk. His green eyes sparkle at me.

“Lots of work to do,” I say simply. I don’t tell him the truth, which is that I needed a distraction today. Being alone in my apartment would only remind me of how unhappy I am. “Why are
you
working on Thanksgiving?”

“Well, someone’s gotta do the dangerous work of guarding this ol’ building tonight.” He flexes his arms, the light polyester of his shirt tightening around his very ripped biceps.

That gets me to smile. “If you say so, Tough Guy.” I resume my stroll towards the front door.

The smile drops off of his face. “Okay, seriously? Everybody else wanted the night off to be with family. I don’t have family out here to celebrate with so I decided to pick up the extra shift.”

I feel a small twinge in my chest because I can relate to what he’s saying. As much as I love New York, it sucks being so far away from home on a holiday like this.

“I’m missing out on my aunt’s Turkey this year,” he says with a sad smile.

“I’m missing my mom’s sweet potato pie,” I confess softly.

He gives me a light pat on the shoulder. “How about you and me order some dinner right now?” he says, his face brightening up. He rounds his desk and sinks into his chair. He shuffles through a drawer and pulls out a handful of takeout menus.

I hesitate, searching my mind for the most convenient excuse. I’m not sure that spending time alone with such an attractive man is exactly a smart plan for me right now. I feel vulnerable. I don’t want to do anything stupid out of desperation. “You’re working, Jackson. It’s not very professional of you to be having Thanksgiving dinner with me while you’re on the clock.”

“Hailey, not one soul has walked through the doors of this building in the past two hours. Having dinner with you won’t be a problem.”

I fumble again, searching for a better cop-out.

“Look Cowgirl, I can tell that you don’t have any plans for tonight. So please don’t try to make up an excuse.” He cocks an eyebrow and pats the seat of the empty chair next to him.

I push a sigh past my lips. “Okay. Let’s order dinner.”