More sobbing, from which he gathered that even their father hadn’t been able to persuade Jamie to come back to her.
‘I have to go to work now but I’ll be round at about six.’
She was still sobbing when he hung up.
He was dreading the visit all day. OK, she was his sister and blood was thicker than water, but they’d never been close and he’d always resented the way their father had favoured her.
When Rachel opened the door of the flat, he was shocked at how dreadful she looked.
She turned and trailed inside, leaving him to close the door.
He was even more shocked when he saw the state of the place. He turned to Rachel, who was sitting on the sofa snivelling into her handkerchief. It never did any good to be kind to her when she got into a state like this, so he said sharply, ‘Stop crying this minute!’
She hiccuped to a halt, staring at him resentfully.
‘I’m not sitting down in this mess. Come on. We’re going to clear the place up.’
‘My life is ruined and you talk about tidying the flat!’
He yanked her to her feet. ‘This place is a health hazard and I’m not going out for takeaway until it’s safe to bring food back.’
He chivvied her into helping him tidy up and she trailed to and fro, following his orders, but not thinking of anything for herself. They had to take two big bags of rubbish out to the bins, and when he saw the pile of dirty washing, he gave her another blast and forced her to put the washing machine on.
‘What’s so hard about pressing a few buttons to get the wash cycle going?’ he demanded. ‘I don’t even have a washing machine. I have to use the one belonging to the block of flats. My place is a near slum, but it’s in a better state than yours.’
‘Why are you living there, then?’
He lost patience totally. ‘Because it’s all I can afford, you fool!’
‘If you’re going to shout at me, you can go away again.’
‘I’m your brother. I’m not going away. But I will shout at you if you act stupid. Grow up! You can’t expect everyone else to look after you.’ Honesty made him add, ‘I was going down the same path myself, but when Mum chucked me out, I had to face a few unpleasant truths. I’m working two jobs now to pay off my credit cards.’
‘Two jobs?’
‘Yes. I thought I’d told you: I’m working as a kitchen hand in the evening at the weekends. And
do not
give me that scornful look. It’s fun, even if it is rough on the hands, and I get a pile of leftover food as well as my wages.’ He didn’t tell her about the toys. Well, there was nothing to tell yet. ‘Now, get your jacket. We’re going out for some food.’
‘I can’t go out looking like this!’
‘I’ll give you ten minutes to tidy yourself up. Don’t tell me you can’t hide most of that, because you’re good with make-up.’
He was still having to order her around, though. How did you persuade someone to think and act for themselves? Maybe it was too late. Maybe she’d literally been spoiled rotten. He didn’t like to think of that, though. She was his sister, after all.
Rachel insisted on turning her back to the other diners, so they sat in a corner of an Indian restaurant. At first she toyed with her food then started to eat ravenously.
‘You’ve not asked about Mum,’ he said as they waited for their gulab jamun, his favourite dessert.
‘After what she did at my wedding—’
‘She had concussion.’
‘Oh, don’t you start.’
‘She really did have concussion, Rach,’ he said quietly. ‘I’m not lying to you. And even if she hadn’t had the accident, you and Dad treated her shamefully and I let you. I still feel guilty about that.’ He saw that mulish look on her face. ‘Rachel, if you don’t believe me about Mum’s accident, I’m leaving now and never coming back to see you.’
‘But Dad said—’
‘He’d say anything to paint things his way, you know he would. Where is he now? Is
he
looking after you, inviting you to stay with him? No, he isn’t. I bet he’s blaming not being able to have you on Tasha, too.’
She was silent, then, ‘Mum really did have concussion?’
‘Yes. I swear she did. Quite badly too, because they kept her in hospital overnight.’
‘Oh.’ More silence as she used her fork to rearrange the grains of rice left on her plate. ‘Is she . . . all right now?’
‘Yes. She’s got a job and—’ He remembered in time not to tell her the details.
‘Mum’s got a job? What as? A housekeeper?’
‘Is that the only way you see her?’
‘Well – yes. She’s always stayed home, hasn’t she?’
‘Rotten sort of life she led, too, picking up after you and me, waiting on Dad hand and foot. Then he dumps her for a more up-to-date model.’
‘You never used to take Mum’s side.’
‘I’ve had time to think. I can’t afford a television yet and you can only read so much, then you start thinking.’ And feeling ashamed of yourself.
When they came out of the restaurant, he dragged Rachel into a late-night mini-mart and made her buy some fresh food, then walked her back to the flat.
‘Don’t go,’ she said as she led the way inside. ‘Stay here tonight. I don’t like being alone. I’ve got some wine.’
‘You’ve had enough wine. And I have to go to work tomorrow, which means getting a good night’s sleep and ironing my shirt.’ He moved to the door, then turned and said firmly, ‘I should think pride alone would make you start to get your act together. Or do you consider yourself so useless at the age of twenty-three that you can’t even manage a little washing and cooking? Do you really need looking after like a helpless baby?’
She scowled at him. ‘I hate housework.’
‘Don’t we all?’ A thought occurred to him. ‘Have you been to work since Jamie left?’
‘No. My life’s fallen apart. I can’t cope with working.’
‘How are you going to live, then?’
‘Daddy said he’d help.’
‘He might for a week or two, then what?’
She shrugged.
He suddenly lost patience. ‘You’re a waste of space, Rach.’
She sagged against the door frame, clutching his arm. ‘You will come back to see me, won’t you?’
‘I’ll come to see you at the weekend, but I’m only staying if this place is clean and tidy, and you’re back at work.’
He heard her start sobbing again as he walked away, but hardened his heart. Life was a matter of sink or swim. Once you grew up, you had to learn to swim on your own.
He’d try to help Rach, but he wasn’t going to do everything for her. He was having enough trouble managing his own affairs.
On Wednesday morning Molly found an email from Stuart Benton waiting for her.
Hope things are going well. If you still want to sell your house, I’d love to come and discuss it with you.
Stuart
She read it through again. Sell the house! He must want to live near his mother now that Jane was on her own. She emailed back straight away to say she’d be happy to see him any time and gave him directions, but warned him that she was working most of the weekend.
When she went up to the sales office, Euan was waiting to go out to a series of meetings in London.
‘You look pleased about something, Molly.’
‘I think I’ve just found a buyer for my house.’
‘That’s good news.’
‘Yes. But at the same time it’s so final. I grew up in that house, moved back there after my parents died.’
‘And when it goes, you’ll be rootless.’
She nodded. He seemed to understand such things without her having to spell every detail out for him.
‘You don’t have to sell.’
‘I do. The old Molly lived there. The new one isn’t going back.’
‘But it still hurts?’
When she nodded, he came across to give her a hug.
‘Is it still all right for me to move the rest of my things in this evening? I’ll not be back till nearly eight because I have to go up to London again.’
‘Of course it is, you fool. I’ll have something ready for you to eat.’
‘Just something simple. I’ll be having a big lunch, if I know my friend Don.’
‘I could go across and move the food from the kitchen to the caravan, if you like.’
‘Is there no end to the ways you support me? You don’t have to.’
She looked at him very seriously. ‘I think I was born to be a general factotum.’
He frowned. ‘Not the best term to describe you these days. I think “executive assistant” suits what you do better, because you go way beyond what an average employee would be able to handle.’
She tried it out. ‘Executive assistant. Sounds good. You’re on.’
‘I have to get going now or I’ll be late.’
She was left on her own, so phoned Avril to arrange cover for the lunch break, then sat thinking about her old house. She’d been ready to sell once and Craig had put paid to that. Would he do something to prevent Stuart buying? She’d better warn Stuart. But surely a man like him would be capable of handling Craig?
The next evening Brian rang up and after checking she was all right, said abruptly, ‘I thought you ought to know, Mum. Jamie and Rachel have split up.’
‘
What?
’ She couldn’t even think for a moment, it was such a shock.
‘Yeah, surprised me, too, after all the fuss she made about the wedding.
He
left her, says she’s a slob. And she is. I went round to see her and the place was toxic.’
‘What does your father say about that?’
‘Dad spoke to Rachel, then went round to see Jamie, but said there was no moving him. He rang to ask me to keep an eye on my sister, but he’d no need to. I’d already gone round to see her. She is in a mess. If I ever think of getting married, I’ll definitely live with the girl first to make sure we’re compatible.’
She’d never heard him mention marriage before, except as a joke. ‘Are you thinking of getting married?’
‘No. But I’ve met a rather nice girl and she’s agreed to come out with me, so I’m thinking of going steady. I won’t be able to wine and dine her in style, though.’
‘What does that matter?’
He laughed. ‘It doesn’t to her, and as for me, I’m quite a reformed character these days, Mum.’
‘I know. I’m really proud of you.’
When she put the phone down, she was smiling.
Euan came back a little earlier than she’d expected and she had to tell him about her son’s phone call.
‘He’s got two jobs now to pay off his debts. I can’t imagine Brian working as a kitchen hand.’
‘Good for him. What was the bad news?’
‘You read me so easily. Rachel and Jamie have split up.’
‘After only two months? That’s quick.’
‘Mmm. I’m not going to ring her, though. It’s up to her to contact me. She didn’t even give me a chance to explain at the wedding.’ Her voice wobbled on the last phrase but she blinked away the tears.
His phone rang just then, his older son. Euan was on the line with him for fifteen minutes, smiling and nodding. She couldn’t help overhearing and envied him that ease of communication.
When he put the phone down, he said thoughtfully, ‘I need to tell the boys I’m with you. I think it’ll be better to do that by email. I’m sure they’ll be all right about it once they’ve met you. We’ve talked about the possibility of me finding someone else, and they’re all right with the idea in theory, but they were fond of their mother, so it’s best to tread gently.’
‘I like the way you all loved her so much. I hope someone remembers me as kindly.’
He gave her hand a quick squeeze. ‘They will.’
‘I need to tell Brian about us as well. I was too shocked by the news about Rachel to do it today. And you’re right. Email will be better, so that I can think carefully about exactly what I want to say.’
‘It’s complicated, isn’t it, going into a second relationship?’
‘Is this a relationship?’
He didn’t hesitate. ‘It’s the beginning of one and I hope it goes further.’
‘Living with you isn’t complicated, Euan. I’m surprised at how easy you are to be with, even in such cramped conditions.’ She didn’t say the obvious, that Craig had never been easy. She was trying not to mention him at all.
‘If we can manage to rub along together in our present circumstances, I reckon we can manage anywhere.’
His eyes held a promise, but he didn’t speak that promise aloud, and she didn’t want him to – yet.
A little later, she sighed and said, ‘I can’t help worrying about Rachel. I don’t know whether she’ll be able to cope on her own. But if I pick up the pieces yet again, she’ll never learn, will she? I used to threaten all sorts of things, but in the end I gave in and cleared her room up every now and then, because it was a health hazard. And she refused point blank to learn to cook. You should have seen the messes she brought home from school. She spoiled them deliberately. Her father laughed but I hated the waste.’
After a minute or two she said, ‘Let’s talk about something cheerful now.’
‘I second that. How about a glass of wine?’
‘Excellent idea.’
Fifteen
On Thursday night Jane was woken suddenly. She lay for a moment or two, wondering what had disturbed her, then heard footsteps on the gravel outside and sat up abruptly, her heart pounding.
The security light hadn’t come on, but whoever it was wouldn’t have got so close without waking her. She slept very lightly these days.
She was shocked when a voice yelled, ‘Stupid old bitch!’ and a rock was hurled through the window. Stuart had been nagging her to have double glazing fitted, saying it was safer as well as warmer, but she preferred the old glass, with its imperfections that turned some parts of her garden into wavery images. Besides, she liked the look of old-fashioned sash windows and she didn’t want to live in a hothouse during winter.
Sitting upright in bed, with her heart pounding and fragments of glass everywhere, she reached automatically for the alarm buzzer and pressed it. There was the sound of another window smashing elsewhere in the house and she whimpered, afraid to stir from her bed. What if they got inside before Stuart arrived? What if they attacked her? Hooligans did attack old people for no reason.