My Boyfriends' Dogs (9 page)

Mom brought out sandwiches. Then we went right back to work and sanded or stained all afternoon. Finally she called it quits. “Step away from your brushes. I've had it for today. I can't believe what a terrific job you guys did.”

Amber stretched. “I think I'll call Mom to come get me. I'm pretty beat.”

“I'll take you home, honey. It's the least I can do.” Mom turned to Went. “Went, you were a huge help. I really appreciate it.”

“Always a pleasure to help out another Beach Boys fan.” He glanced around the garage. “Where's Adam? I better get Dad's car back before he has a fit.”

I was lodged behind the dresser with the little dog sleeping peacefully on my lap. “Adam's here, Went. Are you sure you have to go? We could order pizza.”

“Tempting. But I told the guys I'd hang tonight.” He called our dog. “Adam!”

Adam didn't budge.

“Why don't I keep Adam overnight? You won't be home anyway.”

“Fine with me.” Went walked over and kissed me goodbye on the forehead. I got to my feet and carried Adam toward the house. “Bye, Went,” I called again.

“Bye, Bailey,” he called back. He was still talking to Mom.

I couldn't help watching the two of them together. If you hadn't known better, you could have thought
they
were boyfriend and girlfriend.

I set Adam down by his water dish and let him drink. Then I hurried back to the garage, in case Went was still there. I got there just in time to see Went whisper something to Mom. And as he did, his hand slipped around her back for a little hug.

I was sure there was nothing to it. This was my mother we were talking about. But I stayed where I was, out of sight, until Went got into his car.

Mom turned, looking dazed or puzzled, and walked back to Amber. “Amber, am I crazy, or did that boy just hit on me?”

Amber's answer came like a flash. “You're not crazy. He's hit on me, too.”

“Amber! Went hit on you?” Mom sounded shocked.

Adam scratched at my leg. I picked him up and retreated farther, one foot in the kitchen, one in the garage.

“More than once,” Amber admitted. “Almost as soon as he showed up, after Bailey was already into him. A couple of times since then, too.”

I couldn't see Mom's expression, but I could imagine it. “Did you tell her?”

“Are you kidding?” Amber said. “She's crazy about him, Big D. I couldn't do it.”

I buried my face in Adam's furry neck. Tears pressed behind my eyeballs, but I wouldn't let them out. I didn't want to know that part of Went. That wasn't
my
Went.

I breathed in Adam's earthy scent. Then I made a noisy entrance to join Mom and Amber in the garage. It took all I had to pretend I hadn't heard a word.

 

I pretended a lot after that. I pretended not to hear the rumors about Carly and Went, and Meagan and Went, and Went and Whoever at Dave's parties. I pretended not to mind if Went didn't ask me out on the weekend. I pretended it didn't matter that he'd started leaving Adam at my house night and day. I was glad to have Adam around. But it meant Went and I spent less time together.

Still, the time I did spend with my boyfriend was sweeter than ever. He couldn't have been more caring or more loving when we were alone together. Some nights we sat outside or in the empty amphitheater at Millet Park and watched the stars. I lived for those moments, when he'd hold me and tell me how beautiful I was, when he'd kiss me and make me feel things I'd never felt before.

Each minute with Went was a new experience, even our make-out times—which I would never call them because it meant too much to me, and to him, too, I was sure. One night he'd kiss my ear and breathe softly into it, and I could have melted into the soft spring grass. The next time he'd kiss my neck and send off tiny explosions through my nervous system. I was falling deeper and deeper in love. And I was willing to do whatever it took to stay there.

A few weeks before school let out for summer, Went got himself a car. It wasn't much to look at, but it was his. He picked me up for school every morning. I missed our walks, but riding to school with Went and walking in with him had to make it clear to people like Carly and Meagan that Went Smith was taken—by me.

Sometimes at night we took long drives and parked on country roads. We'd sit together, close on his not-bucket seats, and kiss. Or we'd climb up on the hood of his car and lean back against the windshield. Those were the times when things got tense. We didn't come out and talk about “it,” but I knew Went wanted to steal second base, race past third, and slide home. And he knew I didn't. Or wouldn't. Eventually, he'd get frustrated, and so would I, and he'd drive me home in silence.

Things were getting pretty frustrating at school, too, especially in the cafeteria.

“Bailey, can't you tell your boyfriend to tell Carly to eat somewhere else?” Amber complained. “I'm so tired of having the whole Dave Crew, plus Carly, invade lunch.” She grinned at Darius, who was sitting next to me. “No offense, Darius.”

Darius laughed. “None taken.” When Darius laughed, I could still see through the shaved head and arm tatts to the kid who'd sat by me in Sunday school. “Don't let it get to you, Bailey.”

I wasn't sure what he meant by “it,” but watching Carly with Went, I had a good idea. “They're doing it, aren't they, Darius?” I whispered.

He shrugged. “It doesn't mean anything to either of them.”

“How could sex not mean anything?” I whispered back. I could see Amber straining to hear us.

“See?” Darius said. “That's why he has sex with Carly and not you. It would mean too much to you.”

“That doesn't make any sense!” I said it too loud. Amber's eyes got huge, and Dave looked over at us. But Went was too busy talking with Carly to notice.

“Makes perfect sense,” Darius said, like we were talking about math problems. “Look, a guy's got needs, right?” This time he lowered his voice and leaned down so we were eye level. “And you're a virgin, right?”

I felt my face heat to blood red. “Darius!”

“I'm just saying. Carly supplies
that
need. You supply the rest. No big deal, girl.”

But it
was
a big deal. It was a huge deal. I guess I knew in my heart that Carly and Went were . . . I couldn't even say it to myself. Suddenly dizzy, I got up from the table.

“Bailey? Are you okay?” Amber's voice mixed with the buzzing in my head.

“I have to get out of here.” I ran out of the cafeteria, leaving my lunch, leaving Went there . . . with Carly. I couldn't live like that. I couldn't share my boyfriend. And now that I knew—really knew—what was happening, what was I going to do about it?

 

When Mom got home from work, she found Adam and me curled into a fetal position on my bed. She sat on the bed with me. “What's the matter, honey?”

I shook my head. I wanted to tell her. I wanted to talk to her. She was my best friend, even more than Amber was.

“You can talk to me, you know?” she said. “Something tells me this has to do with Went.”

Tears flooded my cheeks. Poor Adam was wet from the spillage.

“Did he do something to you?” she demanded.

“No!” I sat up. “He
didn't
do something to me. That's just the point.”

She got up and paced the room, then came back to the bed and tugged me to my feet. “Come on, Bailey. I always think better when I'm saling.”

“You want to go to a garage sale? Now?” It wasn't even a weekend.

In minutes we were trolling the streets of Millet in search of garage sales. Neither of us said anything about Went for at least fifteen minutes.

“There's one!” Mom slammed on the brakes like we were on a safari and had spotted our first tiger. She wheeled into a driveway with a GARAGE SALE sign stuck in the lawn. Nothing was set up outside. The sign looked old, and the garage door was shut.

“Mom, they're not even open.”

“They will be.” She shut off the engine and got out.

“I'll wait here.”

“Coward,” she muttered. Mom ran up to the front door and rang the bell.

After a minute the door opened, and a woman appeared. Mom pointed to the sign. The woman shook her head. Mom begged. Finally the woman disappeared inside the house. Mom gave me a thumbs-up sign, and the garage door opened.

In a few minutes she walked out with a giant, gaudy picture frame and a bright yellow wicker shelf that would have been perfect in a hut in the South Pacific.

She waited until we were in the van and cruising again before she started prying. “Okay, Bailey. So what's up with Went? Is he pressuring you to have sex? Is that it?”

“No. He's never asked me that.”

“And he knows you're a . . . that you haven't . . .” She glanced at me and didn't even seem to notice the GIANT GARAGE SALE! sign on the lawn we were passing.

“The whole world knows I'm a virgin, okay?”

“Don't say it like it's a disease. It's a gift.” Her voice softened. “And you only get to give it once.”

“I know. But I love him, Mom. I've never felt like this.”

Her fingers tightened on the wheel. “You may love lots of guys before you find
the
guy, Bailey. Are you going to have sex with all of them?”

“Some people do,” I muttered, thinking of Carly.

“You're not one of them,” she said simply.

“Well, maybe I wish I were.”

Her head snapped around. “Bailey Daley, you don't mean that! Do you want to go around leaving pieces of yourself with every guy you think you're in love with? Is that what you want? Because that's what happens.” She made a sharp U-turn and headed back toward home.

“Maybe I don't know what I want.”

“Well, I know what you want!” She was getting crazy. This wasn't “Big D.” She was screaming at me like regular moms—and I didn't like it one bit.

“You
don't
know what I want!” I shouted back. “How could you?”

“I know that you want to be happily married. I know—”

“I'm not talking about marriage! I'm sixteen. I'm talking about keeping the only boyfriend I've ever had. I'm talking about doing what everybody else is already doing.”

“Bailey!” Mom screamed. “Do you hear yourself?” She almost missed our street and had to turn so sharply the tires screeched.

“Yeah. I hear myself. And it's a good thing because nobody else in this van does.”

She pulled into the driveway and slammed the brakes. “Bailey, don't you dare have sex with that boy! Wait until—”

But I didn't let her finish. “
You
didn't wait, but you want me to?”

“Bailey!”

“Well, it's true. So what gives you the right to tell
me
to wait?” I stumbled out of the van before she had the engine off. I should have known better than to think she'd understand. She wasn't my sister or my friend. She was just my mother.

 

The next few days, Mom and I were painfully polite. I apologized for the crack about her not waiting to have sex. She'd always been straight with me about “having to get married,” but she'd never let me feel like I'd been an accident or a regret. She'd convinced me that I was God's gift to her, no matter what the route.

But even my apology and her acceptance couldn't wipe out the tension between us. Something had changed. Maybe it had changed the day Went walked into my life, the instant I'd stepped over that invisible line and convinced him to run away from Carly with me.

And now, I couldn't help but think that there was another invisible line I had to cross to keep Went away from Carly.

Sunday night with only a week of school left, Went and I sat on the hood of his car, a thick blanket beneath us and a blanket of stars above us. His arms locked around me, we melted into each other, into our own world. I leaned back against his chest and listened to his heart beat. “Went?”

He pressed his cheek to mine and stroked my hair. “Hmmm?”

“Could we do something this weekend? ” The last two Saturdays I hadn't even seen him. He'd hung out with Dave's crew . . . and Carly, although he never mentioned her when he gave his brief reports on his weekend activities.

“Why? Did Big Barry get a new movie in?” he teased.

“We could go into Larkfield,” I suggested, snuggling even closer. The night had grown crisp, but I felt warm in his arms. I could have stayed like this forever.

“Sure. We could take in a Larkfield flick Friday night.”

My chest tightened.
Friday
night. “If we went on Saturday afternoon, we'd get a discount. Then maybe we could go to the zoo. We should celebrate the end of school.”

“I told Dave I'd go with the guys to Cairo Saturday.”

Everybody knew there was nothing in podunk Cairo except free-flowing, no-ID-checking beer. Most of the rumors I'd heard about Went and Carly involved that slimy excuse of a town. I turned and faced Went. His green eyes glowed in the moonlight, and I almost couldn't stand how handsome he looked. “Went, don't go there.”

“It's no big deal, Bailey. We can still do Larkfield on Friday. We could leave right after school lets out and—”

“Carly will be there, right? In Cairo. That's where you and Carly meet, isn't it?” I sounded so calm, even to myself. But inside stars and planets were exploding.