My Soul Laid Bare: Book 4 (The Soul Keeper Series) (3 page)

Sam spent the week trying to make his
“drunken stupor” up to me. He apologized profusely multiple times and promised he would never drink another drop in his life time. I told him that I just needed time to get over it. I would be okay. All week I made excuses to avoid his touch, his kiss. Elijah stayed visible which made things much easier to cope with.

“
Brennen, look at me.” He gently tips my chin up with his fingers. “There is no rush to get over being brutally attacked. You should think about telling Sam the truth or at least some version of it.” His eyes swim with nothing but love for me. I know he's right. I was hoping to spare Sam from ever knowing the truth. I remember how scared he was the first time he found out he attacked me.

Elijah told him the truth to try and help get Sam and I back together. His plan backfired, and after that, Sam was afraid to go near me. He started dating Payton just to make me think he was over me. Of course when they wiped his memories, the truth about his mark went with it, and that reason is why I am so afraid to tell him the truth again.

I break away from Elijah's hold and grab a few things for the shower. He disappears into the red sky world when he hears our lock being released. Lexi's back. She looks rejuvenated with fresh pink cheeks. Her skin is practically glowing.  Her hair is let down in generous waves of blond that almost rivals my own in length.

She meets me at our bedroom door for a quick hug before she tosses her bag on her bed.
“I am so glad to be back here. I never thought I'd live to see the day that I look forward to school starting back up.”

“
Funny, I thought the same thing when I got home.”

“
So how was your Christmas with Sam?”

“
You wouldn't believe me if I told you.”

“
Oh? Now you have to tell me.” She perches herself on the arm of the sofa eagerly awaiting the story.

“
Christmas with Sam turned into Christmas with Sam and old friends of mine Elena, Inara, Will, and Jesson and then my ‘Cousin Elijah’ came a knocking.” I make air quotes around Cousin Elijah.

“
Are you shitting me? Elijah showed up?”

“
I shit you not.”

“
Wow, so what happened?”

“
We all sang Christmas carols by the fire and drank eggnog. It was all very Norman Rockwell.”

Her brows dip down low in disbelief.
“So Sam never caught on, and what about Elijah?”

“
Let's just say, you thought your trig class was complicated? My love life couldn't be sorted out by Einstein himself.” I give a wink to Elijah in the red sky world as he narrows his eyes in my direction.

“
Speaking of love life… I can't wait to see Asher. He's been on my mind since the day I left.” Lexi swoons over a cell phone picture of him as she dramatically plops her body down on the red shag rug. She smiles and kisses his glass lips.

“
Uh oh, someone's venturing into love territory. Watch out Lex. You’re on the road to complicated.”

“
I know. Isn't love wonderful, like brain scrambling, heart palpitating, and shave your legs twice in one day kind of crazy?”

“
Yes, it sure is.” I leave her gushing on the floor and return to my task of readying myself for Sam's date.

When I emerge from the bathroom, a cloud of steam follows me out. Lexi is still on the floor, rolled over on her stomach with her feet drumming out a beat as she’s texting Asher most likely.

“Oh by the way, now that our roommates are gone, I was going to move into the other bedroom. I prefer not to have a window full of light searing my retinas every morning,” she mentions while still lost in her phone.

“
That's good because I prefer to have a butter free room. Everybody wins.” She cracks up laughing at our inside joke. A while back I asked her what sex was like. She compared it to butter, “
You drop it on a heated pan and watch as it slowly melts, consuming the pan with every bit of its yumminess. But once you've gone butter, you can never go back to plain old oil, you'll crave its delicacy, its sensuality. You'll imagine what the next dish will be like even after the first bite
.”

“
Girl let me just tell you Asher is the best butter I’ve ever had. He can seep into my arteries any day.”

I huff a laugh and shake my head at her.

“I know this probably goes without saying, but Sam's coming over to pick me up. So don't mention anything about my ‘cousin’ Elijah, please.”

“
Fine, but that's one cousin I wouldn't stop kissing.” I watch Elijah's eyes round out at her comment. I lick my lips at the mere thought of his lips. He's looking positively edible with his face half shaded with stubble and a crisp blue button down with sleeves rolled at the elbow.

“
Yes, no kissing cousin jokes. We're still keeping an open relationship, but he doesn't want to know when or with whom I'm going out with.”

Elijah rolls his head around on his neck as if he knew all along I was single and ready to mingle. I can't hide anything from this man, this gloriously sexy man leaning against the window casing peering at me as if I'm all he would want for dinner.

Heaven help me! We all get to go on a date together. How is that gonna work? 
I think as Elijah watches me looking nothing but possessive and a tad bit amused by my predicament.

Sam arrives, and I climb into his extra-large truck. He must have some serious mileage on this thing by now, what with driving it all the way to Texas and now here. He's bound to add more now that we're less than two hours away from each other.

“What's good around here?” he asks as I warm my hands over the air vent. He takes them instead and holds them together in front of his lips blowing a lungful of heated air over the tips. The quick swiping motion makes me jump, and I try to take a deep breath and calm down. His brows dip a little, but he doesn't say anything. God! I'm an idiot for agreeing to go out with him so soon.

“
Um, there's a great pizza place everyone raves about, Pinocchio’s ––Noch's.”

People, lots of people...
This is irrational I keep telling my brain, but the fear has taken over. Sam is an angel, and he wouldn't ever hurt me. But my eyes focus in on his hard knuckles wrapped around the steering wheel. His bicep flexes as he turns the wheel only reinforcing my fear. Sam is perceivably strong. His athletic build inflicted so much pain that night. Thank God I passed out when I did. I wonder how much damage he actually ended up doing. When I woke up in Amorous, I had no pain at all. They healed me with their ability to do so and even his scraped knuckles were smooth after.

I sit as close to the door as I can muster, and Elijah shifts uncomfortably in the back seat. Only I can see him. I know he wants to hold me right now, to make me feel safe. Sam turns the station on the stereo and turns to look at me while we're stopped at a light.

“Why are you way over there?” Usually I'm nestled under his arm right in the middle seat.

“
I thought you may be too hot with the heater and your coat on.”

“
You are always allowed to make me hotter,” he says flashing his milk white teeth as he smiles. “Now get over here. I've missed you.”

I scoot in, but my body remains rigid. His arm drapes over the seat rest, and his fingers run small circles on my shoulder. Luckily we pull into the pizza place a moment later. He slides out and offers me a hand since his truck sits three feet off the ground. A gust of frigid air quickly chills my bones as Sam ushers me inside. Scents of oregano and garlic linger in the air.

The place is packed as usual. It’s the most popular place to dine since it's only a couple of blocks from campus. There's only one table left, and we grab a seat just before another couple does. The brunette glares into me as I hang my purse on the back of the chair. They end up splitting a table with another couple. 

“
So they stuck me with this guy who is a total player. He's had about five girls in and out of our room just this afternoon. He made out with four of them, and the fifth willingly handed over her econ notes with the premise of him “stopping by” her place later. Anyway, I think I know why his last roommate must have bailed. Our room smells like sex and feet, not a good combination.”

Seeing Sam so relaxed and carefree eases my nerves a little, combined with being in a chatter filled cafe. I'm starting to feel more at ease. Elijah sits leaning against the counter to offer us a modicum of privacy although he can still probably hear everything.

“So you'll have an endless parade of beautiful women passing through your room? Is that what you're saying?” I immediately regret my words, knowing it's a sore spot for us.

He starts to explain, but the waitress comes by and takes our order. I think I recognize her from my econ class. I should get a job here. It might help take my mind off of all this dating nonsense and complicated love life. He continues where he left off.

“You know you're the only one I'm interested in having paraded in front of me.” He gives a flirty smile, “minus the trench coat.” He motions at my buttoned up neckline topped by a plum plaid scarf.

I manage a small smile and shake my head. I notice he's already got the attention of several girls in the place, and I wonder about the possibility of Sam taking another girl out on a date. He pulls off his coat and hangs it over the chair. The wall of people has it overly warm in here, so I do the same.

His hand reaches for mine from across the table, and I let him take it. “Hey, is everything okay? You've been acting distant lately. I hope you're not wishing I’d stayed at Baylor.” Sam sees right through me, and he's hit the nail on the head. Maybe Elijah's right. I should tell him some version of the truth.

“
Maybe we could go somewhere later and talk where it's quiet.”

I watch the smile fade from his face like I just confirmed every worst thought in his head. I brush my thumb over his hand which has lost its grip over mine. There is no shortage of girls in this time zone that would gladly take up where I left off. Sam is a great guy, and I am no good for him. I won't give him any false hope that things will magically get better now that he's here. We sit in silence for a while until our pizza comes, and then it's just polite small talk while avoiding any topic that remotely resembles love.

After the awkward dinner, we hit an out of the way coffee place that seems like it would afford us some place to talk. I've been running different scenarios in my head since we left Noch's. Sam sets our cups down and readies himself for the blow.

I blink into the other realm and gaze into Elijah's midnight eyes pleading with him for the right thing to say.
“You'll do fine. You always know the right words.”
Um, yeah sure things always work out great for me. Don’t they?
He takes up my hand and I can still feel his warmth in my realm.

“
Are you ready to tell me what’s been eating you up?” Sam asks.

“
No, not exactly, I’m afraid you’ll think I’m crazy.”

The tension in his body relaxes a bit.

“Have you ever blacked out, and woke up with a chunk of your life missing?” I ask and take a long slow sip of my salted caramel mocha, reveling in its complexity. He absorbs my words, and I watch as they sink in. He tells me about his past experience in Texas when he was in high school. He woke up with bloodied knuckles and police at his door. They arrested him for beating up a freshman and tying him up in the woods all night. He recalls a few more times as well.

“
Sam, I need to tell you something, and I know it’s going to upset you.”

“
What is it baby?” His brows peak with worry.

“
I lied to you.” My words hit him in the gut. The corners of his mouth turn in as he dips his chin down. “On New Year’s Eve, you did the same thing to me. You tied me up and attacked me.”

“
No!” He stands up and backs away from me. “No, I'd never hurt you. Bren, I love you.”

“
I thought you were going to kill me, but Elijah stopped you just in time.”

“
No, he said I got drunk. You didn't have a mark on you. I swear I’d never...” He sinks back down to the chair and scrapes his fingers through his hair so forcefully I think he may remove parts of his own scalp in the process.

I keep my words calm so the staff doesn't round the corner to check on us.
“Do you remember drinking anything other than the glass of champagne?”

“
Please, no. Tell me I didn't hurt you baby.” His plea is heartbreaking, and a lump forms in my throat.

“
You punched me in the stomach really hard and left bruises.” I know it wasn't him. It was Malphas. I wish I could tell him this. “But I know that it wasn't you doing it. It was almost like you were someone else.”

“
That kid, he said the same words. He said he swore it looked like I wasn't controlling my own actions, like I had evil inside me.”