Authors: Julie Blair
“Will this make you orgasm?” Carly’s eyes were on hers again, her breath hot on Jamie’s cheek.
“Yes. Soon.”
“I want you to.” Carly’s eyes turned fiery as her strokes became more confident.
“Suck my breasts.” Jamie’s breathing was ragged as her center heated up, ready to explode. Her nipple hardened the instant Carly’s lips wrapped around it.
“I’m close. Don’t stop.” Jamie rocked against Carly’s fingers and then convulsed on them as the full force of her orgasm ripped through her. “I’m coming. Don’t stop…so good.” Jamie opened her eyes. Carly’s lips were parted, her eyes focused on her hand between Jamie’s legs, hair curtained around flushed cheeks. Jamie’s heart skipped a beat. She was beautiful.
“Can you go inside me? I want to come again and I need you inside me,” Jamie said, still panting from the first orgasm. She guided Carly to her opening and pressed down, drawing her inside. “Just like that. Now rub your thumb over my clit as you stroke inside me.” Jamie spread her legs and rocked on Carly’s fingers. “Yes…perfect.” Jamie closed her eyes and arched her back, pressing her head into the pillow as she came, squeezing Carly’s fingers. Finally unable to take any more, she gripped Carly’s forearm to stop her as she floated on the release.
“Can I stay inside you?” Carly laid her cheek on Jamie’s breast.
“For as long as you want. That was unbelievable.” She meant it. Everything about Carly was a surprise. Jamie lifted Carly’s chin with her finger and kissed her, intending to keep it sweet and soft. When Carly slid her tongue inside her mouth, she let Carly take the kiss where she needed it to go.
*
Carly woke slowly, aware of an arm draped over her belly. Keeping her eyes closed, she breathed in these last precious moments of the best night of her life. Tears stung her eyes. How could she leave this woman, this bed, where so many questions had been answered? She traced her fingers over the back of the hand that not long ago had been buried deep inside her. Stroking over the muscled arm and up to the cheek that was turned toward her, she memorized the features of Jamie’s face—the short nose, the full lips she’d kissed endlessly last night, the perfectly arched brows. She tucked curls behind Jamie’s ear and let her hand rest in the softness for as long as she dared before sliding carefully from the bed. Jamie stirred and reached out toward Carly, but she didn’t waken.
Carly brushed her teeth and washed her face but didn’t dare take a shower for fear of waking Jamie. Pulling her hair into its customary ponytail, she checked her reflection in the mirror. No one would know by looking at her that she’d spent the night making wild love with another woman. She could walk out of this room and back into her life without a trace.
But she knew, as surely as she knew she was pregnant, that this night and this woman had forever marked her in the worst possible place—in her heart. She covered her mouth and choked back a sob. If things were different she’d fall back onto the rumpled sheets and wake Jamie with soft kisses across her back. They’d make love again and order room service and lounge around until they had to leave for the airport. They’d get seats next to each other and whisper secrets to occupy the time as the plane carried them back to the out-and-proud West Coast, where Carly would choose a different life.
She picked up the jeans from the floor and slipped two twenties from Jamie’s pocket. She wrote a note on hotel stationery and set it on the nightstand. Staring at the tanned back with the broad shoulders and narrow waist, she moved her eyes down to the firm ass and muscular legs she’d run her hands over a few hours ago as Jamie straddled her face. Her cheeks warmed when she saw the marks her fingernails had left. Closing her eyes, she made sure she had this moment and this woman’s body indelibly etched in her mind.
The flight home was a five-hour battle with tears and nausea. She smelled Jamie on her skin, and her eyes burned with images of their lovemaking. Songs from the concert floated through her mind, adding a soundtrack to her heartbreak. As she walked off the plane the exhaustion of the last twenty-four hours hit, and she fell into Mike’s arms. They would be married soon and it was too late for any other choice. On the drive to their apartment it was easy to hide her real sorrow in the story about what had happened with her parents. She’d forget their cruelty, but she’d always remember Jamie’s kindness.
*
Jamie sighed and stretched. Soreness brought memories of last night. And Carly. She rolled over, reaching for the warm, soft body. She was alone in the bed. The room was too quiet, and she knew before she pushed the bathroom door open. Towels lay where they’d tossed them last night, but the navy slacks and white T-shirt were gone. She trudged back to sit on the edge of the bed they’d demolished last night, pillows lying askew, sheets hanging to the floor. Holding her head in her hands she tried to calm her racing thoughts. She stood up. If she hurried she could catch Carly at the airport. She sat back down hard. If Carly had left, it had been on purpose.
Jamie wasn’t sure at what point she’d started to think of Carly as more than a one-night stand. Her eyes filled with tears, a rare occurrence. Reaching for the light switch, she saw the note on the bedside table, and read it without picking it up.
“I’ll never forget you. Love, Carly.”
Jamie showered quickly, desperate to get out of this room that smelled of sex, of Carly. She tucked the note carefully between two T-shirts in her backpack. Leaving her duffel with the bellhop, she walked out into the warm, humid air and wandered until it was time to leave for the airport. Feelings she’d never experienced bubbled up as she replayed the hours with Carly.
Jamie stopped at a pay phone on her way to the boarding gate. She needed to hear a friendly voice before she got on that flight. She stared at every girl that looked even remotely like Carly, but each time the hopeful beat of her heart skidded to a disappointing halt. “Hey, Penni.”
“I thought you were getting back yesterday.”
“Cancelled flight. I wish you’d come with me.” Jamie stared at the faint outline of the purple stamp on the back of her hand. She hadn’t tried to scrub it off.
“Me, too. I’m sure you had more fun than I did setting up my classroom. You sound tired. Bag too many babes?”
“Not exactly. I sort of got my heart broken.” The explosion of laughter wasn’t unexpected. The silence afterward was.
“Wow, you’ve never said that before. How ’bout if I come over for dinner tomorrow. We can gorge on Chinese takeout and Ben and Jerry’s, and you can tell me about it.”
“That would help a lot.” Jamie watched a couple waiting by the boarding counter, their heads together in whispered conversation. That might have been she and Carly.
“That’s what best friends are for.”
“Will you still be my best friend after I tell you I saw Melissa Etheridge in concert last night?” Jamie burst out laughing at the shriek that made her jerk the phone away from her ear.
“You bitch.”
“I assume you mean that in the nicest way.” God, best friends meant everything.
Jamie slept on the flight home, her head on a scrunched-up sweatshirt against the cold window. She retrieved her truck from long-term parking and pulled into the first McDonald’s she saw. She needed comfort food and this would have to do. An hour later she trudged up the steps to her apartment in San Jose and tossed her bags on the couch. Unpacking and laundry would have to wait until tomorrow. Picking up the phone, she took a deep breath and punched in the number.
“I just got home, Dad.” Jamie cradled her forehead in her hand and yawned.
“I would have insisted they get me a flight on another airline. Patients depend on us, Jamie. We can’t let our problems interfere with their care.”
“I’m sorry. I did my best.”
“You need to be in early tomorrow. Mary rescheduled some of your patients starting at eight o’clock, and I left files on your desk for you to look over.”
“All right. I love you.”
Jamie ironed a shirt and pants to wear tomorrow, almost too tired to stand. She collapsed on her bed, wondering where Carly was in this sprawling metropolis and whose bed she was in. Her eyes filled with tears, the lost opportunity pulling at other lost opportunities. Carly had touched her heart in a way it had never been touched before. Was this what her mom meant when she described what being in love felt like? “Your heart beats differently around them, like you’ve found a rhythm you didn’t know you needed.” She wanted more than one night and for the first time in her life felt the pain of a lover’s rejection. She fell into an exhausted sleep and woke in the dark, reaching for the soft body in her dream.
September 2011
Jamie walked up Ocean Street toward the Pine Inn, balancing two cups of coffee and a bag of goodies from the bakery that had been there since her childhood. Best bear claws in the world. She’d been lucky to get a room on short notice at the romantic inn, and over Labor Day weekend no less. They hadn’t been away for a weekend in too long, and Jamie felt guilty that she’d been neglecting Sheryl.
Anger bit at her when she thought about the reason. The discovery that her long-time office manager had been embezzling from her was still raw. She breathed in the cool, foggy sea air that she loved, and her good mood drifted back. “Nice morning for a run,” she said to a man about her age, his face flushed and his T-shirt sweaty. She should have brought her running shoes.
Sheryl was propped against the headboard, her shoulder-length hair neatly arranged, wearing the new chocolate-brown silk pajamas Jamie had bought her yesterday. They matched Sheryl’s eyes perfectly, and Jamie had visions of slowly addressing each of those buttons, then sliding her hands inside to caress Sheryl’s breasts. It had been weeks since they’d made love, and Sheryl had been too tired last night. Jamie needed that connection. She needed them to be all right. She stared at the computer on Sheryl’s lap. Work.
“Presents.” Sitting down next to Sheryl, Jamie opened the bag and waited for her to dip her nose into it and inhale, a gesture Jamie had always loved.
Sheryl frowned at something on the computer screen. “I don’t want—”
“They’re fat-free blueberry muffins. And skim milk in your coffee. Come on.” Jamie rattled the bag. “You don’t have to diet every minute. You look great. Those jeans you had on yesterday made me want to peel them off you.”
Sheryl kept typing. “With single-minded determination you can accomplish anything. Now, if I can get that promotion everything will be perfect.”
“How ’bout if I feed you?” Jamie waited for Sheryl to open her mouth for the bite, a long-time game they’d played since Jamie had teased her about how they’d eat cake at their wedding. It hadn’t happened and the disappointment was still there.
Sheryl pulled off a tiny piece of the muffin, sniffed it, and popped it in her mouth. “Not bad.”
“I love Carmel.” Jamie took a big bite of the bear claw. “Mmm.”
“How can you eat all that sugar and fat?”
Jamie smiled at Sheryl’s pinched expression and tucked strands of her blond hair behind her ear. The new highlights were pretty. “They were my mom’s favorite. We’d walk down and get them every morning and—”
“I know. Every time we come here you talk about the summer vacations here with your mom when you were a kid.” Sheryl frowned. “We couldn’t afford to go anywhere but to see our grandparents in Atlanta for vacation.”
“But you’ve had some nice vacations with me, haven’t you?” Jamie chased the bear claw with a long sip of coffee.
“You’ve always taken good care of me.” Sheryl kissed her on the cheek. “And yes, I love the Lexus. It makes me feel important.” She kissed Jamie’s cheek again.
“I wanted you to have something nice for your birthday.” Jamie took Sheryl’s hand. “Nothing’s going to change, I promise. I’ll get this business problem worked out. I’ve been going through patient files every spare minute and finally got a break. I’ve found some files where the EOBs—”
“I have no idea what that means. You just need to fix it so it doesn’t become a scandal and get in the newspapers or something.”
“I can’t imagine it would.”
“I can’t take the chance. You saw what happened last year when that problem with those girls turned into such a big deal. I should have had that promotion.” Sheryl’s voice took on the venomous tone it always did when she discussed that subject. “I don’t want to be a principal forever. I want to get to the district level, and I’m perfect for that new curriculum-development position.” Sheryl’s eyes sparkled as if she were looking at a diamond bracelet. Maybe that’s what Jamie would buy her for their anniversary.
“I still wish there’d been another way to handle it.” Jamie felt uncomfortable. She trusted Sheryl’s judgment but didn’t like the hard line she’d taken with the two high-school seniors. Sheryl had always been conservative about public displays of affection and Jamie respected her feelings, but being out and proud still mattered to her.
“School districts are a lot more conservative and political than you think. It’s not just about how hard you work. It’s about making allies out of the right people. You have your dream, Jamie. I want mine.”
Jamie wasn’t sure it was exactly her dream, but maybe she was just feeling old and tired. “I want you to be happy. You know I’ll support you any way I can.”
Sheryl patted her hand, nails perfectly manicured. The red polish looked sexy. “Get your business problem fixed. That’s all I need from you.”
“That’s all?” Jamie moved her hand up Sheryl’s leg. “Let’s spend the morning in bed and then go for a walk on the beach.”
“I’d rather go shopping in town this morning, then drive up to Pacific Grove and look around the shops there before dinner. I can’t believe you got reservations at Pebble Beach.” Sheryl’s smile made all the last-minute work to plan this trip worth it.
“Maybe a walk on the beach tomorrow? Or a drive along Seventeen Mile Drive…take a picnic?” Jamie rested her cheek against Sheryl’s shoulder as she typed. “You work too much, babe.”
“And you don’t? I like that we’re a career-minded couple.”
“Tomorrow maybe we could be less career-minded.” Jamie kissed along Sheryl’s throat.