Night Sky (16 page)

Like Mom probably feels right now. “Sky’s
amazing, Mom.”

“You’re falling for her fast, aren’t you?”
Her eyes look clear again and a smile is starting to crease the
edges of her mouth.

“Yeah.” It sorta takes my
breath away.
Sky takes my breath
away.

“Are you swimming this afternoon?”

“Always.”

“Well, I’ll let you know how it goes.” She
rubs her hand on my knee a few times, before leaving my room.

I’m about to ask her if she can find out why
Dad hasn’t called me back, but at this point, it’s probably not a
good idea. They have enough to hash over without bringing me into
the mix.

***

I don’t know how long I’ve been swimming,
but my legs are burning, my arms are burning, and I’m about to call
it quits. I slow down and let myself sink to the bottom. That’s
when I notice slim bronze calves under the water.

It’s Sky, resting her feet in the pool.

Part of me wants to rush
up to her, but I sit and stare at her legs instead. Mom’s right.
I’m falling fast. It’s a completely different feeling than how I
fell for Sarah. And I really need to stop thinking about Sky and
Sarah in the same thought. It’s just that they’re the only two
girls I’ve ever loved.
Do I love Sky? I
need air.

“Hey.” She smiles when our eyes meet.

“Hey.” Yep, I’m in
love
with
Sky
.
I wade over
to her. My face is about level with her stomach. I rest an arm on
either side of her legs. Tiny shorts, today…

“You’re all wet.” Her smile is wide as she
puts a warm hand on both sides of my face.

“The pool does that.” I smirk.

“Funny.”

“Wanna join me?” I grab her waist like I’m
going to pull her in.

“Not today.” Her voice is relaxed so I
loosen my grip.

“I missed you this morning.”

“Well, it was barely morning when I left.”
She giggles in her soft voice.

“I looked forward to waking up next to
you.”

“Well, if you’d woken up
in the
morning
,
and not the
afternoon
, you could have.” She rubs her hands across the top of my
head.

“Maybe we could try it again sometime.” I
don’t breathe as I wait for her to answer.

“I’d love that. I slept better last night
than I have in a long time.” Her face comes down until it’s resting
on my head. Her hair falls around me nearly touching the water.

“Good.” I squeeze her waist again. “Maybe
next time I could help you in the shower.”

She pulls away shaking her head, but she’s
smiling. “Then it wouldn’t be spontaneous.”

“I don’t think I’d care if it was
spontaneous or not.” I let myself grin as wide as I want.

“You’re shameless, Jay.” She bends forward
to kiss the top of my head.

I hear the door of the house open and close.
I look around Sky to see Mom through the glass. She pauses when she
sees us, then heads for her room.

“Your Mom needs you.” She leans down and
kisses me.

I part my lips for more, but she’s already
backed away. “Can I see you tomorrow?” I ask.

“I’m…” She frowns. “I’m busy tomorrow.”

“All day?”
Do I seem desperate?

“Not all day, but I’m not sure for how long
and…” She’s mumbling—something she never does. She looks away, and
I suddenly feel shut out of whatever’s going on tomorrow.

“Hey, is everything okay?”
I touch her cheek lightly to get her to look at me. It takes a
second before she lets her eyes reach mine.
It’s so unlike her.

“It’s stuff that’s going on at home…a clan
meeting. I can’t be there in person so they’re going to patch me in
via speakerphone. It’s just hard being so far away from
everything.” She stands up, letting out a long breath.

I feel like I’m not
helping her as much as I should. “Sky, I…”
Wait a minute.
“Does this have
something to do with your brother?” I’ve been meaning to ask her
about him since our trip to Red Rock.

“Kind of…it’s just clan
stuff. I’m part of the group, so I should be involved.” It seems
like she’s trying too hard…but why?
“My
brother is supposed to be involved, but he doesn’t always show
up.”

I’m not sure what to
say.
How do I call her on it?
Because I don’t think she’s telling the
truth.

“Your mom needs you, Jay. Call me later if
you want, but don’t leave your mom until you know that she’s okay.”
She stands up with the soft, liquid movement that’s just part of
Sky.

Maybe she’ll tell me tomorrow. Maybe it’s
just stuff that’s important to her as a clan member, but might not
make sense to me.

Mom walks back through the living room into
the kitchen. She’s changed into her workout pants and a t-shirt.
Not a good sign for whatever passed between her and Dad.

The problem with helping Mom is that it
makes me angry with Dad. It’s really hard to help someone when
you’re mad at the person who is the cause of that pain. Especially
when that person has hurt you, too.

Sky disappears out the
gate.
Thanks Dad for ruining a perfectly
good afternoon.
I know I need to help Mom,
but I’m just tired. I take longer in the shower than I need to and
when the hot water starts to run out, I know I’ve run out of
excuses.

Mom is sitting on the couch. The TV is on,
but I don’t think she’s actually watching it. Her face is flat and
her eyes are vacant.

“Didn’t go well?” I ask, sitting next to
her.

“It’s just so…” She looks empty, resigned.
“It’s just that I never thought this would be something your dad
and I would ever have to deal with.”

Me neither.
“Did he say anything about coming home?”
Why am I so hopeful?
Right now, I can’t stand the guy.

Mom wipes away her tears
and takes a breath. I’m a jerk for even asking.
“No, he just wants to see you. I told him you have a swim
meet this week. I’m gonna skip it so he can go to this
one.”

“That’s ridiculous! I don’t want…” But I
can’t finish the sentence. I want them both to be there, but why
torture Mom with this? And it sucks too because she’s here doing
the daily stuff, but Dad is the one who gets to come to the meet.
This will be the second meet Mom’s missed ever. The only other one
she didn’t attend was when she had pneumonia and couldn’t get out
of bed. But I guess at least Dad wants to come. That’s something,
right?

“I don’t want to be around your dad right
now. Will it be okay if I’m not there?” Her large brown eyes meet
mine.

“It’s okay, Mom.
Whatever’s easiest for you.”
It sucks
seeing Mom such a mess.

“I’m sorry about all of this.” She blinks a
few times and has to wipe more tears from her eyes.

“You shouldn’t be. Dad
should be sorry about all of this. He still hasn’t even returned my
call.” I need a punching bag. Seeing Mom cry like this hits a nerve
inside of me that makes me want to act out my frustration.
He loves her! How could he do this to
her?

“I’m sure you have plans with Sky. Why don’t
you…?”

“Why don’t we watch a movie, Mom, or go for
a swim or something?” It suddenly feels like I’ll let Sky down if I
don’t take care of Mom. And I’d be a real jerk if I just walked out
leaving her crying and everything.

Mom offers a faint smile while leaning her
head on my shoulder. “Thank you, Jameson.”

“No problem.” But really it’s sort of crazy
that I’m suddenly in the position where I’m the one who has to take
care of my mom.

***

It’s Sunday afternoon. I still haven’t heard
from Sky. I didn’t expect to, since her conference call with the
clan is today, but it still sucks. We had this amazing night in the
pool and she slept over. But it’s like I haven’t had the chance to
hang out with her since.

The backyard gate opens
and Sarah walks through.
Not Sky.
I’m lying on the far side of the pool. Her light
brown hair spins around as she turns to close the gate. She hasn’t
noticed me yet. Sarah, so familiar, yet such a stranger…who now
resides in a weird place in my heart. I know I still haven’t
thought about her the way I should—the way that would make sure I’m
past her…over her.
Her petite frame walks
in short athletic steps, and she bites her lower lip nervously
before raising her hand to knock on my door.

“I’m out here.” I sit up.

“Oh!” She spins around. “Hey, Jamesy.”

“What’s up?” Sarah hasn’t just stopped by
since…well it’s been a long time.

“Checkin’ on ya, that’s all.” Her smile is
bright. Her dimples show even from here.

“I’m alright.”

She walks around the edge of the pool. It
feels wrong, or weird that we’re alone together. She’s with
someone, and I’m with someone. I thought that me dating Sky, not
that she has Eric, would make our friendship easier. But it hasn’t,
not really. I’m not even sure what to say to her.

“Thanks for going on the double date on
Friday.” She sits on the low chair next to me resting her elbows on
her knees.

Oh, right.
I almost forgot. It feels a million miles away
after how I spent the rest of that night. “Yeah.” My eyes drift
over Sarah. She’s in a tank and shorts. On her, it’s cute. On
Sky…well, cute isn’t the word I’d use to describe anything about
Sky.

“Sky’s really nice. She followed me to the
restroom.”

Oh, right.
Sky wanted me to talk to Sarah about Eric’s
roaming hands. “Are you happy with Eric?”

“Yeah.” Her smile is a little too wide, and
her answer is a little too quick.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.” There’s an edge to her
voice that makes me think she’s hiding something, but I don’t know
how to call her on it.

We’re silent, and I let
myself relax into my chair.
Well, Sky, I
did my part.

“So you and Sky are close.” Her eyes are
intent.

“Yes.” But I don’t want to tell her how
close we are. It’s like a betrayal of trust or something. Telling
one girl you like another girl—it feels like something that just
isn’t done.

“That’s it? That’s all you’re going to say?”
She kicks my calf with her foot. She’s trying to tease, but her
body looks—too straight, too tense—for teasing.

“She’s the most
straight-up, honest person I know.”
And
that’s the simple truth.
What’s funny is
that I always used to think that mystery was erotic, but it isn’t.
Mystery is terrifying. Honesty is erotic. Sky is…

“And that’s good?” She’s chewing on her
lower lip again.

“Scary as hell at first.” I laugh. “But
yeah, it’s nice. We always know where we stand. I can tell her what
I’m thinking, even if she doesn’t want to hear it, and she does the
same.”

“Maybe I should try that.” Sarah’s head
tilts off to the side.

“Everyone should.” If my parents would,
maybe they’d be able to get their crap together. Though, I don’t
know everything that’s passed between them.

Sarah’s phone beeps in her pocket. “Gotta
run.”

“You shouldn’t have to
jump every time he calls, or texts, or whatever.”
Is this what Sky meant about Eric?

“And what do you do when Sky calls?” she
asks, getting to her feet.

She has me there.
“Point taken.”

“Thanks for worrying about me,” she says,
walking away. “It’s sweet.”

Sweet…sweet?
I don’t know what to do with that word. Is it a
friend word? I’m not sure. Why did I listen to Sky and talk to
Sarah? I want things to be smoothed out, normal, good…not
sweet
.

With Sarah gone, I sit up
and check my phone to make sure I haven’t missed any messages or
texts from Sky. I haven’t.
Man, that
sucks.
I stand up and dive to bottom of
the pool
—
where
none of this will matter for a while.

SEVENTEEN

It’s eleven o’clock on Sunday night.

I should be sleeping, but Sky still hasn’t
called. I’m afraid to call her. Even though we have this honesty
thing, I still feel like there’s a lot about her I don’t know. It
might be the simple fact that she grew up in a different world than
I did. I’m not sure.

I hear a soft knock on my glass door and I
leap out of bed. When I slide the door open, I see Sky’s standing
in the darkness. I’ve never seen her look so small.

“I’m sorry, you were probably sleeping and…”
I hear her sniff once and not even thinking about it, I pull her
into my arms pressing her to my chest.

“I was lying here waiting
for you to call.”
I’m so glad it’s the
truth.

“Can I come in?”

I stand back and close the door behind her.
Her eyes are red and swollen.

“What
happened
to you?” I ask. My hand
reaches out to touch the edge of her face. Knowing that Sky was
crying scares me. She’s always so strong. All I want to do is pull
her to me and hold her there. I don’t know what else to
do.

“It’s just that I was hours on the phone in
a meeting where I really should have been present. There’s so much
fighting going on right now. It’s just too expensive to go all that
way when I was just there over break.” She sounds low, defeated.
And I understand absolutely nothing about what’s going on.