Night Terrors (Sarah Beauhall Book 4) (26 page)

I didn’t want to die, damn it. Tears, hot and bitter, burned my eyes, and my throat clenched. I needed to find Katie. I needed to get home to Jai Li.

The adrenaline was ebbing out of my system and my limbs were starting to shake. A despair began to creep into the sides of my psyche. Hope fading to a distant memory.

“What happens to us if we die here?” I asked, my voice steady but my heart thudded against my chest.

“Dead is dead,” Gletts said, standing.

We didn’t say anything for a moment, listening to the whispering tide of eaters as they flowed over the lip of the valley and made their way toward us.

As I stood there, angry and impotent, the great statue turned its rocky head toward me and opened its mouth.

“Sarah?” it boomed.

I nearly fell from my perch as my name echoed off the buildings and hills surrounding the town.

The book above me, the one held by the statue began to glow green and purple.

“What have you done?” the voice said. It was Julie.

Gletts looked up for a moment, gaped at the book which was growing brighter. “Is that your book?” he asked. “The one you carried the last time we talked? The one you used in your dreams?”

I paused. “In my dreams? You mean this isn’t my dream?”

Gletts laughed, a sad and mournful sound. “No, Sarah. This is something beyond dreaming. This place is beyond the Sideways, beyond the land of dreams. This is one of the old worlds. Hel, I’d have to guess. The land of the dead.”

Something moved in the shadows, something malevolent and hungry.

I dropped from the statue and landed on my feet, knees bent. I swung around, bashing the shield at a four-legged bug the size of a Volkswagen. It staggered sideways like a crab as I smashed in its long snout. The vanguard of our final death had arrived. At the last minute, a long proboscis roped out of the great beast and scored the side of my ribs. I screamed as it burned like fire.

Gletts leapt forward slashing down with his short sword, severing the wounded beasts head. I staggered back, gasping for breath. That really hurt.

“Julie,” I shouted. “Can you hear me?”

“Sarah?” Julie called again, the great statue bending down.

“I need the book,” I shouted, pulling Gram free and swinging her around in a wide arc, sending several other bugs scattering back.

“Take it,” she said, smashing the great sword into a scorpion the size of a terrier.

I held the shield out to Gletts. “Take this, and grab a hold of me.”

He tucked the rusty blade under his arm, hefted the shield, and grabbed my elbow. I reached up with my free hand and grasped the proffered book.

Light exploded outward—a great wave of green that scoured the shadows from the village around us, vaporizing the eaters that poured into the square. A heartbeat later a purple pulse followed the green, a deep thrumming chord that rang through the valley. Finally, a red wave followed, emerging from both the book and Gram, a dual blast of cleansing fire that caused the very essence of the world around us to ablate away in fine particles of reality.

And suddenly we were in a place of nothing, a void of shape and form.

There was nothing but Gletts and me. The village, the statue, the Bowler Hat Man, all gone.

“Are you okay?” I asked Gletts.

He grunted, dropping the shield and falling to his knees.

“Where is this place?” I asked.

“Nowhere,” he gasped. “A place beyond the places. I’ve been here once before, but I can’t stay here. We can’t stay here long and survive.”

“Can we find another place, a place to rest?”

He shook his head. “Yes, give me a moment.”

I bent down and touched the side of his face. When he glanced up, I kissed him on the forehead. “Thanks for saving me back there.”

He blushed and took my hand. I held the book and the sword. Saddlebags puddled at my feet. Gletts had the shield.

There was a moment of tension, then my ears popped and we were in a meadow with a crescent moon setting in the far horizon and trees to our right. I glanced around, looking for enemies, but nothing moved.

Gletts collapsed.

I knelt down, rolled him over onto his back and brushed the long hair from his face. He was breathing, but in short choppy gasps.

“We need to get you home,” I said.

He opened one eye and let a ghost of a smile grace his lips. “Kiss me again,” he whispered. “And I’ll go home.”

I thought of Gunnr, the absolutely breathtaking Valkyrie who demanded a kiss in payment. That had turned out okay. What did I have to lose? I bent down, pressed my lips to his, and he exhaled.

For a moment I thought we were back in the void, but when my eyes cleared, I was sitting in my apartment, staring at a wide-eyed Julie.

“Hey, boss.” I croaked and fell sideways, dropping Gram and the book at the same time. The saddlebags slid from my shoulders, hit the floor and gold coins spilled across the floor. A beaded veil lay half in and half out of the leather bag.

Huh
, I thought as Julie’s voice echoed somewhere in the background.
Didn’t expect to bring that home with me
.

Then the world faded, and I had no memories for a very long time.

Forty

I woke up twice in the next thirty hours. Both times I had to pee. Mary made me drink a godawful amount of Pedialyte to keep my electrolytes up. I’d been gone several days and I was famished when I finally got up. I ate triple helpings and then slept for another seven hours. After that, I seemed to be over the worst of it.

I spent the next two days caving at Circle Q just trying to get my shit together. Mary had wanted to take me to the hospital, but when I protested, Julie just told her to let it go. I didn’t talk much during those two days, just sat with them, being a family. Jai Li drew a dozen pictures of me in that time, each one lighter and happier. It was like each drew some of the dark from me, lightening my spirit.

I didn’t know how I felt about things. The Bowler Hat Man was out there still. I don’t think I killed him. Hell, for that matter, I don’t think I killed the eaters. I wasn’t sure they existed like that. I think they manifested themselves from the pain and misery of our lives and dispelling them, perhaps, lightened the load on the rest of us. It was the theory I was running with, in any case.

The gold coins and the veil I stashed in the dresser drawer where I was keeping Nidhogg’s ring. I knew they would matter one day, I just didn’t have a clue when. Jai Li loved playing with the coins, though. Thought they were pretty.

We talked about what happened to me, just us adults. I even called Qindra to check in, make sure nothing I did had caused too much damage. She was surprised how little affect she’d seen.

At Julie’s request I went to work on Monday, falling back into my apprentice role, letting the sheer joy of work fill my mind. I loved the strain of my muscles, the feel of the hammer in my hands, the way the horses smelled. It filled me up, pushed aside the melancholy and the pain. Especially the horses. It was as if they sensed my need and filled it with a nudge of their head, or a gentle bump with their hindquarters. Whoever thought horses were dumb beasts had no idea what the hell they were talking about. They’re intelligent animals, beyond a doubt. As we drove away from the second farm, I was feeling near enough to my old self to start asking Julie questions again.

By the time I climbed into the truck after the fourth farm, I was exhausted and smelled like horse and sweat. It was wonderful. On the way home, Julie pulled into the County Line, turned the truck off and looked over at me, her arms across the steering wheel, and her cowboy hat cocked back.

“I think you need a drink,” she said.

I shrugged. “Whatever you say, boss.”

“Good enough,” she said, reaching over and swatting my thigh. “Let’s get you liquored up.”

I followed her into the bar, passing the farm trucks and the bikes. This was one of those places where bikers, truckers, and farmers mingled with a sort of détente that I’d grown to like. There were occasionally fights, but really, everyone was tired from a hard day’s work and just wanted to unwind a little.

After the first beer, I felt my shoulders start to relax. I leaned back, letting the ambiance of the place wash over me and pushed my hair out of my face.

“You gonna do something about that hair?” Julie asked me.

I shrugged. I’d really lost the ability to care about that.

“I’m worried about you,” she said, draining off the last of her beer. She waved the waitress over, ordered a couple more beers and some hot wings, then settled back, setting her hat on the table next to her and running her hands through her amber hair. It was thick and long, growing longer than I was used to her wearing it.

“What about your knitting?” she asked, pushing her glass back and forth between her hands, letting it slide on the condensation on the table. “You were going to learn to knit socks, right?”

I shrugged again.

She reached over and took my hand. “Listen, Sarah.”

I looked up at her, the act of focusing on her took more energy than I wanted to expend.

“You’re depressed and you’re not dealing with it.”

I pulled my hand back, scrubbed my face, and folded them on the table in front of me. “Depressed?”

“Yes, depressed. I haven’t seen you this bad, ever. Hell, when you and Katie were having all those problems a year or so ago, you were more you then, than you are now. It’s like you’ve given up. It’s like you’ve let them win.”

I laughed dryly. “Them, who, Julie? The dragons? The ghosts? The crazy homeless guys or the giants?” I leaned over, cupping my hands over the top of my tall beer glass and resting my chin on my hands. “Point to something I can take care of and get Katie back, and I’ll be all over it.”

I slumped back and let all the breath I had out in one long sigh.

The waitress showed up with our beers and the hot wings. I took a half-hearted sip of the beer and pushed it away.

“You can’t fix everything,” Julie said, taking a wing from the platter and ripping off a hunk of meat with her teeth.

I watched her chew for a moment, but couldn’t get those eaters out of my head. Those crawling, biting things that consumed everything in their path.

I slid out of the booth, standing. “Can we go?”

Julie looked at me and took another bite of her wing. “Nope,” she said and went back to chewing.

I turned and went to the bathroom. There were two women in there touching up their makeup, so I shuffled around until they cleared the sink. Then I stepped forward and splashed water over my face. I had straw in my hair and it needed to be brushed out. I hardly recognized myself. My hair was longer than I remembered it being since high school. My eyes were sunken and bruised. It looked like I spent all day crying.

I felt flabby and weak. I needed to do something. When was the last time I’d gone for a run? When was the last time I felt badass? I remember thinking I looked badass, before the book had taken me into hell. That had been fun.

I picked the hay from my hair, scrubbed the dirt from my hands and dried off. I thought of Gletts and how we’d battled side by side. He’d been looking for me, looking for Katie. And he’d nearly died for it. Had he gone home? Hell, I had no real idea what was going on in anyone’s life. Time to fish or cut bait.

I smiled at my reflection in the mirror, feeling the rush of endorphins that it caused and pulled my shoulders back, standing tall. I walked back into the bar, slid into our booth and took a long drink of my beer. Julie just watched me as she wiped her mouth with a napkin. I grabbed a thick chicken wing and ripped into it, letting the sour tang of the sauce and the heat of the spices flare up in my mouth, burning into my sinuses and filling my head with a wonderful pain that I’d forgotten could exist.

“I need a plan,” I said, talking around a mouthful of chicken. “I’m out of ideas and I need some help.”

Julie nodded, nursing her beer and listening.

I polished off the last of the wings, knowing I’d likely regret them again later, but cherishing the way I was feeling something real.

“I’m calling Skella,” I said. “Maybe her grandmother will be able to help me figure all this shit out.”

Julie continued to stare at me, smiling and nodding.

“Maybe I’ll see Rolph, too. See what he knows about all this.”

“Qindra, too?” Julie asked. “She does know a lot of things outside of our regular channels.”

I wiped my hands on a napkin and took a deep drink of beer, polishing off the tall glass. A burp the size of Texas ripped out of me, and the guys at the table in front of us applauded.

“Yeah, Qindra, too,” I agreed. “Hell, I’ll ask Nidhogg. And if they don’t know anything, I’ll drive down to Portland and get in Sawyer’s space. Maybe they know something I’m missing.”

Julie finished off her beer, dropped a couple of twenties on the table, and stood up. “Let’s get that wing sauce off our hands,” she said, grabbing me by the elbow. “Don’t want to get that in your eyes.”

I let her lead me back to the bathroom where we washed up.

“Make sure you eat dinner tonight,” Julie told me as we got into the truck. Jai Li is helping Edith cook.

“Oh, my,” I said, thinking about Jai Li in the kitchen. I laughed, the first happy thought I’d had in days. “Is that why we got wings, just in case?”

She shrugged and started the truck. “We’ll see, won’t we?”

It was pleasant riding home then, listening to Julie’s country twang as she sang along to some old Patsy Cline. Music wasn’t half-bad.

We rolled into Circle Q, unloaded our gear, and headed into the house.

Mary shooed us down the hallway, keeping us out of the kitchen. On my way by, I saw Jai Li standing on a stool, stirring something in Edith’s large stockpot. It smelled tomatoey. Girl loved tomato soup.

Julie grabbed a shower in the master bedroom while I grabbed one in the hall bath. I looked at myself in the mirror, waiting for her to shut the water off. Two running at once made for a weak shower, and I wanted it full blast and as hot as I could make it.

While I watched my face, turning this way and that, studying the way my cheekbones looked in the light, I made up my mind.