Authors: Jerrie Alexander
“A large percentage of females who commit suicide leave a note,” Dalton continued. “They either apologize or try to put the blame on someone else, like a cheating husband. ‘You broke my heart, and I can’t go on,’ that sort of accusation. They usually dress for death, and they’re normally sitting in the living room with the TV on. Before you jump to conclusions, remember I said some women, not all.”
“My mother was very fastidious. She would’ve put on her best Sunday dress, plumped up the pillows on her bed, and then lay down.” Unsure she could bear to listen much longer, Chris rubbed the back of her neck. “Why didn’t I notice that she hadn’t dressed?”
“For the same reason the police didn’t,” Marcus said. “They weren’t looking for a homicide.”
Nate stood and started pacing. “We have a bunch of nothing.”
Marcus held back a frustrated growl.
“Does anyone know a hypnotist?” Chris asked.
All heads turned her direction, Marcus’s included. “What questions do you want answered?”
The room was dead quiet for a second.
“I’ve toyed with the idea since I blanked out Chelsea’s killer’s face. To be honest, I’ve been a coward, afraid to let someone take control of my thoughts. There’s so much of my childhood that I don’t remember. If there’s something buried besides the description of the killer, I want to know.”
“Couldn’t hurt, as long as we use someone we trust,” Dalton said, breaking the silence. “I’ll check with the agency office here in Dallas. See who they recommend.”
Marcus gripped Chris’s shoulder. “It’s strictly up to you.”
“Can we do it today while we’re waiting for my adoption records?”
Dalton stood. “I’ll make the call.”
Kay patted the chair next to her. Marcus smiled as Nate followed her unspoken request. She was the only person in the world who could exercise that kind of control over him. A sharp pain hit Marcus’s chest. Jealousy? Not of their happiness. Envy? Hell, yeah.
“Dalton will find someone you can trust,” Kay said.
Chris nodded. Her braid had slipped over her shoulder, and she absentmindedly shoved it back. “If there’s something I’ve repressed, I want it out in the open.”
Dalton returned with his cell phone still at his ear. “You said today?”
Chris nodded.
“Yeah,” he said to the person on the phone. “Great. Marcus Ricci will be with her.”
“Thank you,” Chris said.
Dalton waved off the gratitude with a dip of his chin. “We got lucky. Gayle Stern has agreed to see Chris over lunch. I’ve heard of her. She’s a well-respected psychologist.” Dalton handed Marcus a piece of paper. “Her office address. She’s expecting you within the hour.”
“I’m ready,” Chris said
“Better leave the dog,” Nate said.
Marcus shook his head. “I don’t like it. Last time I left him, I came back and Holly was speaking Spanish to him.”
“We’ll make sure that doesn’t happen again,” Nate said, turning to his wife. “Are you going to tell them the news before they leave?”
Kay’s smile could’ve lit up a football stadium. “Jake will be here in a few days. He’s going to live with us for a while.”
“You’ll take good care of him.” Marcus remained unsure how he felt about the situation. Which Jake was coming home? The man who’d busted his ass to become a helicopter pilot so he could fly wounded soldiers to safety? Or the one who’d helped kidnap teenage girls and had supervised their sales?
On his last mission, all the passengers on his flight had died, which no doubt weighed heavy on Jake’s shoulders. Even though the surgery had solved his medical problems, he’d struggled to forgive himself. Would he ever fully come back?
A cold nose pushed its way under Marcus’s hand, and he glanced down at Diablo. Trusting brown eyes stared up at him. The dog had been given a second chance at life, so why couldn’t Jake get one, too?
Marcus understood guilt. He’d be there to help his friend.
“If you two are going to make it to Dr. Stern’s office, you’d better go,” Nate said. “Diablo will be fine until you get back.”
“We left this number with the attorney. If he gets his hands on Chris’s adoption paperwork and can’t reach us—”
Nate nodded. “Kay or I will go after them.”
Marcus knelt down and scratched Diablo’s ears. An odd feeling rolled around in his belly. He didn’t feel right leaving him today.
Chris was waiting, so he patted Diablo on the back. “Stay with Kay,” he said. “Be a good boy.”
Chapter 21
Being hypnotized was a little scary, but Chris wanted any buried secrets to surface. This perpetual fear was eating away at the lining of her stomach and had to stop. Yet, the closer they got to the doctor’s office, the more hesitant she became. The idea of handing over control made her feel extremely vulnerable.
Marcus must’ve sensed her tension, because he reached across the car and rested his hand on her knee. “You comfortable with Dr. Stern getting inside your head?”
She attempted a laugh, but it sounded more like she’d choked. “I will be if you stay in the room with me.”
“If you want me there, that’s where I’ll be.”
“I don’t have anything to hide, especially from you.” Trying to lighten the mood, she added, “You already know your way around my body, I might as well let you prowl around inside my head.”
“Every time I touch you, it’s a new and wonderful exploration.” He glanced at her. His eyes sparkled with humor.
“What a nice thing to say.” Heat sizzled between them, crawling up her arm and circling downward.
This was a different Marcus. A more relaxed and at ease Marcus. Had they passed a juncture in their relationship that she’d missed? Dare she hope he’d moved past his wife’s death?
“I like watching you squirm.” He released her hand and placed his on the steering wheel. “Thank you for trusting me with whatever secrets might be revealed in your session.”
She did trust him, not only with her body but also with her mind. Could she extend that trust to her heart? “Have you straightened everything out with your insurance company?”
“I called yesterday morning while you were still asleep. They’re sending a check for the car, which of course they totaled, and they’ll pay for the damage to the house, minus the deductible. No doubt, I can kiss those policies goodbye.”
“You can replace the car, but inside your house...well, those were personal belongings. Those things were important.”
“You’re important. Stop worrying about things in the past. When this is over, and I’m sure you’re safe, we’re going to talk about what’s essential and what’s not. I promise. Normally, I’m not one to postpone things, but in this case, I think we should catch our killer first.”
Slam. The door had closed on the subject. Chris didn’t want to wait, she wanted to tell him she cared, but she could also see his point. People were dead and dying. If she and Marcus were going to have a future, the killer had to be stopped.
One thread still held him to the past. For Marcus to move forward, he’d have to completely release his dead wife.
She pulled down the visor, flipped open the small mirror, and stared at the mess in the mirror. Her actions had a double purpose. One, she wanted to change the subject, and two, she had to try to look presentable. Sheesh. Her braid was a mess. This morning she’d applied a dusting of makeup and had dressed in slacks and a blouse. Still, she felt underdressed to enter a psychologist’s office. One she’d never met.
Her mother’s words came back to Chris. Mother had always preached that first impressions were how people remember you. Chris’s heart folded. All this time, she’d believed her mother had committed the ultimate act of selfishness and had taken her own life. No way would she have done that.
Chris fished her bag from the back seat and unbraided her hair. With a brush, rubber band and a clip, she swept it back and rolled it into an acceptable knot. A swipe of lipstick would have to do, as would her clothes.
“The doc’s office is in the Palmer Building. Should be the next exit.” He turned on his blinker, changed lanes, and then glanced her way. “You look great.”
“Thanks.”
The Palmer Building stood forty floors high and was one of the city’s hallmark buildings. She’d been inside many times. When Marcus parked, she got out and walked ahead of him.
“I like what they’ve done with the landscaping,” she said, keeping the topic generic.
“You’ve been here before?”
“My father’s attorney is, or was, on the twenty-seventh floor. A sweet older man. He held my hand through three funeral arrangements, court appearances to file documents, and the transfer of ownership on everything my mother and father owned. He planned to retire soon after the estate was settled. His son was a partner.”
The glass exterior of the building presented a cold and distant feel. She’d never been comfortable there. Maybe it was because none of her trips had been for pleasure and nothing to do with the man she’d visited. Nothing had changed in that regard. They stopped by the wall of names and suite numbers, verified where they were going, and then headed for the bank of elevators.
“Do you want to stop by on our way out? We’ll make time if you’d like to check on him.”
“No, I’m sure everything is different now.”
The doors swooshed closed behind them. Marcus stood directly behind her. He slid his hands around her waist and rested his head on top of hers.
“I meant what I said about talking soon. I didn’t mean to come across as harsh earlier. Right now, your life is more important than anything else is. I can’t ask you to make any decisions until this case is closed.”
“You’re right about one thing. My life is plenty screwed up.” The ache in her chest eased a little. “When it comes to relationships, I’ve never been lucky.”
“That’s hard to believe. I’ll bet you had boys lined up outside your door.”
“Nobody worth remembering.” It was time for her to shut up. Before she blurted out what was really on her mind. The time had come too reel in her emotions because she was teetering on the edge of falling in love with him.
Marcus followed her down the hall and into the doctor’s office. A young woman behind an oversize desk had a sandwich and chips spread across her blotter. They’d interrupted.
“I apologize if we ruined your lunch,” Chris said.
“Think nothing of it.” The woman dropped her napkin over her food. “You’re Ms. Holland?”
“Yes.”
“The doctor is expecting you.” The woman stood.
“Don’t you have some paperwork for me to fill out?”
“Only the doctor handles her patients’ information.” She turned to Marcus. “Would you like a cup of coffee while you wait?”
“He’s coming with me,” Chris said firmly. She wasn’t budging on that point.
“Not a problem. If you’ll follow me.”
Chris’s hands were suddenly clammy. The second they’d stepped into the quiet office, her adrenaline had spiked, and she wanted to run.
The warmth radiating from Marcus as his hand rested on her back helped calm her. He’d keep her safe while she was virtually unconscious. She wiped her hands on her slacks right before being shown into the doctor’s private area.
Dr. Stern stood. She smiled, adding another layer of wrinkles, but at the same time, warming an otherwise formidable face. Her cream-colored linen suit looked to have been tailored to fit her robust figure. The jacket she wore complemented her peach blouse.
Chris’s knees stiffened. Marcus stepped forward and shook the doctor’s hand. “Thank you for seeing us so quickly.” He handed her a folder. “Special Agent Murphy thought you might want to look this over.”
“Thank you. Your office emailed me the file. It won’t hurt me to skip a meal. I try to accommodate the FBI when I can.” Dr. Stern came out from behind her desk, shook Chris’s hand, and then waved her toward a chair. “Come sit down.”
“Thank you.” She mustered a weak smile.
Dr. Stern leaned against her desk. “I’ve never lost a patient. Based on your expression, you might be the first.”
The doctor’s demeanor and gentle voice went a long way toward easing Chris’s tension. The joke was appreciated. Still, she took the chair closest to Marcus.
“I understand there are a couple of areas you’d like to explore. Your early childhood and your sister’s murder.”
“You got all that from an email and committed it to memory? I’m impressed,” Chris said. “And jealous.”
“Don’t be. I have total recall. Most of the time it’s a blessing.” Dr. Stern walked back behind her desk and sat. “Let’s make sure you understand what’s going to happen. There are lots of myths and misunderstandings about being hypnotized.”
Chris listened intently. “Will I remember what was said?”
“Absolutely. You won’t be unconscious. In fact, you’ll be aware of everything. Understand that I can’t make you do anything against your will or force you to tell me anything you wish to keep a secret. Clinical hypnosis is an altered state of awareness, a highly relaxed state. Your mind will be able to concentrate and will be highly focused. Most of my patients remember everything that’s said, but there are no guarantees.”