No Love Allowed (Dodge Cove Trilogy #1) (23 page)

“Is that a yes?”

“That is most definitely a yes.”

As much as he wanted to dance in place, he collected himself and entwined her arm with his again. He led her across the threshold beneath the Vincent van Gogh banners and guided her into the
marble lobby. Taking her hand, he veered left toward the first exhibit hall. Her eyes widened when she saw the paintings. She let go of him for a moment and danced toward one showcasing children
playing.

“Would you believe this is only the second time I’ve been here?” she asked as she moved to another canvas, this one featuring a mother holding her child.

“Why?” He had to force himself to speak. Her presence awakened emotions in him he had never felt before. Elation at seeing her healthy again. A protectiveness begging him to keep her
safe at all costs. Fear she might reject him that night. And the strength to stay until the end, regardless of the outcome.

When she smiled so openly at him, he thought his chest would explode. “Doesn’t matter. I’m just happy to be back.”

He dared to hope. “Because you’re with me?”

“That. And because van Gogh is here.”

He stamped down the rising jealousy for two reasons. One, he was getting worked up over a dead guy. And two, she had loved van Gogh long before she met him. So he reached out for her hand. Didi
could hardly contain her glee as she entwined her fingers with his. He kissed the back of her hand as they continued their trek deeper into the empty museum.

“Do we have this place all to ourselves?” she asked when they entered the second exhibit space, which featured a collection of still lifes by various masters.

“Until midnight,” he said with a tinge of self-accomplishment.

“How did you—” She stopped herself. “Of course. You’re Caleb Parker.”

“No bills were exchanged during the planning of this date.” When she merely looked at him curiously, he rolled his eyes and sighed. “I volunteered here a couple of summers
back. I know the security guard.”

“Did Nathan help?”

He shook his head adamantly. “If it were up to my cousin, party-planner extraordinaire, the floor would be littered with rose petals and a four-piece orchestra would be playing. This is
all me.”

She laughed. He had sorely missed that sound too. “You never cease to amaze me.”

Her wonder went straight to his heart, spreading much-needed warmth. “We haven’t even really started yet.” He led her into the room he had a feeling she had been eagerly
waiting to see, based on how much she bounced on the balls of her feet.

“Caleb!” She squealed, letting him go once more in order to run toward the first painting she saw. The artist’s self-portrait. “Did you know he used a mirror while
painting this? So when you’re looking at the right side of his face, it’s actually his left.”

“Because the mirror reflects the opposite image.” He stood at her side, soaking up as much of her happiness as he could.

“Exactly,” she said, turning to him. Then her eyes widened, clearly seeing what was just beyond his shoulder at the center of the room. “Dinner?”

He turned around to face the simple table for two with two candlesticks and two silver domes covering their food. Giddy anticipation at what he had prepared grew as he pulled her seat back for
her. Once she was seated, he lifted the silver dome to reveal a Big Mac, still in its box, and a bucket of fries, ketchup packets on the side. Didi covered her mouth with both hands, looking up at
him with complete adoration on her beautiful face.

“You remembered,” she whispered.

He took one of her hands and placed a chaste kiss against her palm before he pulled a cooler out from underneath the table. He produced a liter of soda and presented it to her the way a
sommelier at a restaurant would a wine bottle.

“I believe this is the vintage you asked for,” he said in a formal tone.

Didi gave the plastic bottle a quick glance and nodded. She waved at the wineglass beside her plate. “You may pour.”

A soft
hiss
followed the twisting of the cap. “Would you like ice with that?”

“Please.”

He produced an ice bucket from the cooler and used the tongs to add two cubes to her drink. He did the same for his glass but opted for a bottle of sparkling water instead.

“What else do you have in that magic cooler of tricks?” She leaned toward the rectangular box on the floor.

“One last thing.” He exchanged the ice bucket for a hot fudge sundae, which he placed next to Didi’s fries. “I know you love mixing the salty and sweet flavors while you
eat.”

Her beautiful eyes that would forever remind him of golden fireworks in a sky of velvet brown misted over. “Oh, Caleb, this is perfect.”

“Not yet.” He raised a finger. Then he sauntered over to the corner of the room and plugged his cell phone into the speaker jack. After he pressed Play on the list he had put
together during the plane ride back, the melodic strains of the Script’s “For the First Time” filled the four walls of the exhibit.

“I love this song.”

When he returned to her side, he stroked his knuckles down her cheek. “This night is for you.”

Awe and wonder flitted across her face. Then, as if she remembered something, hurt settled on her features. His heart broke. “But I thought you left.”

“To be perfectly honest, I did.” He paused, gathering his courage, then tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. He had to keep touching her, to let himself know she was real, that
this wasn’t just a dream. “I made it all the way to London, checked into the hotel, and caught myself staring up at Big Ben many days later thinking,
This is my life.
I ran
away when what I should have been doing was banging on your door every day with the purpose of convincing you of how right we are together.”

“But you know that I’m—”

“Didi, being bipolar is a part of who you are,” he said, cutting her off. “But it’s not all of who you are. Let me in. Show me all of you.”

“Loving me will never be easy.”

“Bring it. I’m not afraid anymore.” He shook his head to emphasize his words. “I blamed love for the pain I suffered after my mother’s death. I blamed love when you
asked me to go. All that grief had nothing to do with love. Just because my mother died doesn’t mean I love her any less. And just because you asked me to leave doesn’t mean my feelings
for you have changed. I never would have shown up at your house that day if I thought you having bipolar disorder changed anything.” He grinned. “The decision was easy to make after I
realized I wasn’t willing to lose you. So I got on the next plane back here and organized all this.”

“You did all this . . .” She looked around in utter amazement, then returned her gaze to his face. “For me?”

“It was either this or a prom. But this ultimately won out. I wanted something that’s just you and me.”

“A real date.”

His nodded once, allowing the hope he had been suppressing to blossom. “I should have known from the moment I met you that there would be no going back. That I will never be the same. I
know now that I’ll never recover from loving you, Diana Alexander.”

Didi’s eyes misted over as she covered her mouth with both her hands again. It was as if she was suppressing all the emotion that wanted to burst out of her. He pulled her hands away from
her face so he could lace his fingers through hers. Then, with a slight tilt of his chin, he indicated the open space near their table where benches usually sat. He’d had them removed for the
night.

He let go of one hand and executed a bow. “Will you give me the pleasure of this dance?”

At that exact moment, a slowed-down version of Maroon 5’s “Love Somebody” came from the speakers. He helped Didi stand and led her to their little dance floor as he had done at
the Summer Swing. Without any further prompting from him, she wrapped her arms around his shoulders while he hugged her at the waist. They swayed to the soulful tones of Adam Levine’s voice
as he sang about wanting to love somebody.

“So if Europe is canceled . . .” She paused, uncertainty clear in her words.

He shrugged. “Well, since Dodge Cove is where you are . . . Loyola actually has several programs I can explore.”

“But what about your gap year?”

“I thought that was what I wanted. But I’d rather be with you.” He smiled. “We can always travel Europe together. Later, though. I start classes next week.”

“I don’t know what to say. . . .” She looked up at him with a mix of awe and pride in her expression. Her liking the idea gave him the reassurance he needed that he was doing
the right thing. He wanted her to see that his decision, although largely influenced by her, wasn’t solely made just for her. He had done this for himself too.

“You don’t have to say anything.” He planted a kiss on her forehead. “Just know that I love you and will always be there for you regardless of how you feel right now.
I’m willing to wait, Didi.”

“Didn’t I warn you or what?” she asked, grinning.

“What?”

“That you would fall in love with me.”

He smirked. “Yeah. Yeah. You were right.”

“Good to know.” She didn’t even pause when she said, “Because I love you too.”

Just like everything about her, the confession had come out of the blue. To say he wasn’t expecting her to return his feelings with unwavering confidence was an understatement. Even so,
never had three words in the English language meant so much. The music, the paintings, the dinner all ceased to exist. All that mattered was Didi and the way she looked up at him like he was her
entire reason for being.

“I went after you that day,” she hurriedly added. “But when I got to the airport, your flight had already left.”

“You came after me?” he croaked out, his throat tightening.

“Yes.” She glided her hands to his lapels and closed her fingers around them. “I thought I was too late. That if I’d only realized you were telling the truth about your
feelings for me sooner—”

He cut off the rest of her words with his lips. He didn’t need to hear the rest. What truly counted had already been said. It took her a second to respond, but when she did she bared all
her feelings in the kiss. Her wonderment. Her longing. Her love for him. And he returned each and every one with the same passion, crushing her against him until they were both breathless.

Even though he was unwilling to break the kiss, he had to get the words out or his chest would burst. “You’re the first girl I’ve ever fallen in love with.”

She tangled her fingers in his hair. “You’re the first boy I’ve ever allowed myself to love.”

He kissed her again. How could he not after those words?

They resumed swaying as Adam Levine asked someone to stay with him tonight. Maybe there was something to Maroon 5 after all, he caught himself thinking while holding on to the woman he
loved.

As the last lines of the song flowed between them, Caleb whispered into her ear, “Can you see the future now, D?”

She held his face in both her hands and searched. Arms around her waist, he stayed still, waiting patiently. When she found what she was looking for, her beautiful eyes brimmed—made
brighter by the faint light illuminating the paintings. At the first fall, he cupped her chin and brushed the tear away with the pad of his thumb.

She leaned her cheek against his touch and said with a smile, “Yes.”

I ALWAYS BEGIN
this section by acknowledging family. Without the love and support of my mother, I wouldn’t have had the
courage to embark on this amazing journey. She has been there through the darkest of times and cheered me on. She is the pillar of strength and courage I strive to be every day. Our nightly walks
together are saving graces.

This book came to be during one of the most exhilarating, yet equally painful moments of my life. I would like to thank the Swoon Reads community and all the readers for leaving encouraging
comments and expressions of love for Caleb and Didi. Having your support means so much to me. What I know for sure is without your help this story wouldn’t have been chosen as part of the
third list.

Speaking of lists, I would like to thank everyone seated around the table during that editorial meeting that changed my life forever. Thank you, Jean Feiwel, for that call. The fourth of
November will now always hold a great significance in my life. That was the day I met two extraordinary people along with you.

Thank you, Holly West, for everything. I count the days until I can meet you in person and give you a hug. I’ve grown as a writer because of your awesomeness. Your ninja cutting skills are
legendary, unearthing the story beneath the rubble. Thank you for answering all my e-mails. You don’t know how much that means to me. Here’s to more amazing editorial letters in the
future.

This acknowledgments section wouldn’t be complete if I didn’t take the time to pay homage to the great Lauren Scobell. Caleb Parker wouldn’t have been drawn like one of the
French girls if it wasn’t for you. I can hear those giggles all the way from Swoon HQ. Thank you for putting up with a deluge of private Twitter messages and e-mails. Brainstorming has become
so much more fun because I know you’re there. Eternal gratitude. I owe you a hug as well.

Thank you to Liz Dresner for those amazeballs cover concepts. Like I mentioned in my blog post, I couldn’t have come up with any of them, and yet it seemed like you were reading my mind
anyway. You, my friend, I must meet in person.

The editing of this novel couldn’t have gone as smoothly as it did without the help of the entire staff of Starbucks in both Paseo de Santa Rosa and Nuvali. You wonderful people kept me
caffeinated and motivated. Your smiles and encouragements mean a lot, especially when I have camped out for days on end at one of your tables or comfy chairs. The white chocolate mocha latte or the
mocha latte with soy and mint syrup (sounds disgusting but is actually really good) could not have tasted any sweeter without your expert barista hands. Thank you for giving this lowly author a
writing refuge.

To all the incredible book bloggers, thank you for your friendship. Kai, the fact that you share my love for BL blows my mind. You are a wonderful person. Precious, you have been there from the
very beginning. I am in your debt in more ways than one. Fay, you have to keep writing, girl. That dream is within reach. Camelle, stay strong; I am completely in awe of you. Jas, I know you will
forever love Luka, but it makes me happy that you made room for Caleb, too. Louisse, you will always be the best super ninja penguin of them all.