Nobody's Dream (82 page)

Luke’s voice sounded hoarse when he broke the silence. “She’s free now.”

Cassie turned to him and saw tears in his eyes as he stared at the painting. He buried his face in the horse’s neck and stroked her back. O’Keeffe didn’t shy away from him.

Trust. O’Keeffe trusted him, too.

Cassie turned back to the painting and this time saw blackbirds soaring high in the sky.

Free.

The word echoed through Cassie’s mind, but did not come from O’Keeffe. She had been slowly coming to the realization that she could trust Luke even more than she had so far. No man had ever made her feel so free.

Trust him.

Tears blurred her vision. One hand on the horse’s back, she reached around to Luke and stroked the soft hairs on his forearm. A tingle of awareness moved through her fingers, up her arm, and into her heart.

Then deeper. Lower.

She pulled away as if burned.

Trust him.

His patience and gentle touch had led O’Keeffe to feel free again. But would Luke be as successful with her? They were married, but he would never force her to do anything. She had protested having sex for so long, he might even be afraid to broach the subject for fear of yet another rejection. However, the feelings he stirred in her when he held her reawakened places deep inside her.

No, Luke woke those places—for the first time ever.

“I am not sure if I am ready to make love.” She said aloud before she realized she’d spoken.

Luke walked around O’Keeffe and cupped Cassie’s chin, a furrow between his eyebrows. “I know, Sweet Pea. Remember what we said in Peru? Baby steps.” He searched her face. “What’s going on?”

“I want…”

She had never been able to express her wishes with a man, not since she had asked Pedro to dance with her in the cantina. The longing for Luke’s touch nearly overcame her fear.

Nearly.

She took a step back. “Never mind.”

He reached out to stroke her arm, halting her retreat. “Be honest with me. Tell me what you want?”

His gentle hand made nonthreatening motions up and down her arm, strokes much like the ones he used to calm O’Keeffe’s fear of the blanket or saddle.

Trust him.

“Will you…”

How can I ask him this?

“Go on. You can ask me anything you want, Sweet Pea.”

Trust him.

“Will you…dance with me?”

*     *     *

Of all the questions he expected to hear, this wasn’t even in the running. Not after what happened the last time she asked a man to dance with her.

I’m one lucky man.

Hell, if the lady wanted to dance, he was all in. Luke grinned.

“Love to, darlin’. Any particular dance you have in mind?” He could handle a Texas two-step, but would prefer something a little more intimate.

“The tango.”

Aw, have mercy, baby girl.

All he knew about the tango were images of a hot Latin lover and a woman with a long-stemmed rose clenched between her teeth. He’d never taken dance lessons and didn’t have the foggiest idea how to dance a tango.

Talk about a quarterback sack.

Not that he didn’t plan to gain back the lost yards. She hadn’t asked him to compete for MVP in the Super Bowl, after all, just to hold her and dance. “You’ll have to teach me. Not much call for the tango in the road houses I hung out in during college.”

She seemed hesitant for a moment, then nodded. “Let me clean up this stuff, take care of the alpacas, and we can get started.”

The determined expression on her face—as if she were about to face a four-man firing squad—didn’t give him a lot of hope she would be able to relax in his arms, but if dancing the tango could help her overcome one of her internal hurdles, then he’d dance the damned tango. He watched as she packed up the art supplies in her canvas bag.

Luke folded up the easel. “I’ll bring this in and rub O’Keeffe down.”

She nodded and practically ran toward the barn. He’d better not leave her alone too long or she would let the fear take over again. Too bad they couldn’t start his lesson in the corral, but he needed to take care of something first.

“Thank you, girl,” he said as he took a cloth from his pocket and wiped the remaining sweat from O’Keeffe’s neck. “I’ll give you a proper brushing down tonight, but whatever you did or said to help Cassie, I’m forever in your debt.”

O’Keeffe laid a sloppy lick on his cheek, and Luke laughed.

“Don’t you get too fresh with me, girl. I’m a one-woman man—and I’m taken.”

Thirty minutes later, after checking on the horses, he entered the cool house. The sun had been beating down on him all morning, but he hadn’t noticed how hot his body was until he walked inside. The bedroom door was closed. Damn. Had she gone to ground already?

Should he push her limits a little? Maybe, if she couldn’t get past this hurdle, she’d never tackle the rest of the ones still ahead.

First, though, he walked into the kitchen, filled two glasses with ice, and poured them both a tall sweet tea. The creaking of the bedroom door made him turn toward the kitchen doorway and seconds later there stood a new Cassie. The transformation surprised him. She’d pulled her hair back in a sleek ponytail and wore a colorful, long-sleeved top and calf-length pants—both skin-tight. He rarely saw her in form-fitting clothing. This outfit highlighted her slim waist and curvy hips. And those shoes. Sexy, black, with at least a three-inch heel. Much higher than the flats she usually wore.

Luke whistled. “Hot damn, darlin’! Gorgeous!”

She cast her gaze to the floor. “Please say nothing more. I am nervous already.” She took several deep breaths before squaring her shoulders and meeting his gaze. Again he saw the mix of fear and determination on her face.

“Trust me, Cassie.”

“I do.”

No, you don’t
.

Not completely, anyway. Despite the headway they’d made in Peru, he knew she wasn’t ready for him to make love with her. But something had happened out there with O’Keeffe to help her remove a few more of the bricks from her fortress walls. He’d continue to go easy with her. He had the rest of his life to earn her trust.

Jesus, don’t let me screw this up
.

She started to move the coffee table out of the way, and he joined her to help. Soon they had cleared a dance floor of sorts.

She approached him slowly, the natural sway of her hips nearly causing him to lose his cool. “The tango has only a few basic steps to learn.”

Breathe, man.

“Sweet Pea, you just show me what to do.”

“I found a YouTube video we can watch first. You are visual, as am I, and I think this will help you understand what I am trying to convey before we begin.” She picked up her smartphone from the mantle, and they watched a couple do the tango in slow motion. She pointed to the screen and paused the video. “We will begin with this embrace. See it?”

He wrapped his arm around her. “Uh-huh.” So soft. The rest of the video passed by in a blur. All he could focus on was having her in his arms, her body pressed against his.

“Okay, do you understand the general concept?”

“Think so.”

She laid the phone on the mantle again and wiped her palms on her pants before holding up her hands. He mirrored her arm movements, and she walked into his embrace as the couple in the video had done.

Don’t you dare get a hard-on, Denton.

How he was supposed to avoid one stumped him, though. He forced his brain to ignore the sweet scent of her hair.

“Place your right hand behind my back.”

He did so, resting his pinky finger at the top of the waistband of her pants. She stiffened.

“No, no, no!” She put some distance between them. He thought she’d retreat, but apparently this “no” didn’t mean they were finished. “Your hand must be in the center of my back. Just below the shoulder blades.” Her accent had grown stronger. “If your hand is on my hips, I won’t have the freedom to move as I need to do.”

He wanted nothing more than to watch and feel her move, so he raised his hand to where he guessed was about right.

“Shouldn’t we turn on some music?”

“Not yet. I need to walk you through the basic positions and steps first.” Her breathing grew more ragged. Couldn’t be their exertions because they hadn’t really started. Maybe she was as turned on as he was. He grinned as she took his left hand in her right one. Luke wasn’t sure whose palms were sweatier.

“Now, we hold our elbows out and open. If we were on a dance floor, this would keep others from intruding into our space.”

“Can’t have that.”
Nope
. He didn’t want any interference right now. When her breathing became labored and she seemed to be fighting to keep her composure, he prompted, “What next, darlin’?”

“Um, I place my hand across your shoulders.” She reached up with her free hand. “You are taller than…” She broke off, and he wondered who else she’d danced the tango with then didn’t want to think about that anymore. This was between them.

“The man ultimately leads the lady in the dance, but let me show you the three options you have for where your legs can go.”

She spent several tries without success to move his legs in the right direction before grabbing him by the hips in frustration. “No, sway. More like this.” She maneuvered him so that his hips did as she wanted before she released him with an expression of horror on her face.

When she pulled away, he let her go.

*     *     *

What was I thinking?

Cassie drew in a few labored breaths as she tried to regain her composure. Why did she propose the tango? The dance was too suggestive. Should she continue?

Trust him.

I am trying! But this is too hard!

“If you want to take a break, we can try again later. Sorry I’m two left feet here, but I’ve never tried to dance anything this precise before.”

The disappointment on his face charmed her even more. He did want to learn. She would not stop now.

“No, let us continue.” She walked into his embrace again, and they adjusted their bodies. He was so much taller than her ballroom dancing classmate at Columbia. She described what she wanted him to do with his leg, moving it to the outside of hers as he guided her in the dance.

“That was perfect, Luke!”

“Thanks, darlin’. I have a patient teacher.”

Luke was the patient one. She continued to start and stop, fighting down the panic that arose at certain movements. The tango hadn’t been a part of what led to the attack, and yet she’d not allowed herself to express her love of dance since that night, not even to dance with her husband at their own wedding celebration.

I want my freedom back.

Time passed as they continued to move through the dance steps. Luke was a fast learner, and soon they were moving around the space between the sofa and mantel with ease. “Now let’s take it from the beginning with you leading me.”

He executed the first step perfectly. “Excellent! Let your leg guide mine, like so.”

As he gained confidence in his steps, she embellished her movements with a few
ocho
moves, carving the figure eight in a teasing manner before him on the floor. Undeterred, he responded perfectly to her steps. When Luke’s leg stepped out, blocking her as she had taught him to do, she instinctively slid hers slowly over his thigh as she enticed him with a dip of her upper body.

Free your spirit.

He blocked her leg again and she smiled, pulling away to trace another figure eight on the floor with the toe of her shoe.

“Damn, that’s hot.”

Cassie froze. Before she could escape his arms, Luke pulled her closer and forced her to gaze into his eyes. The pounding in her chest nearly drowned out his words.

“I’m not gonna hurt you, Sweet Pea. You’re safe. We’re just dancing.”

Trust him.

“I know.” Her voice came out in a whisper.

“You’re doing great, baby girl. Don’t stop now. I’m just getting the hang of it.” She did not wish to disappoint him. “Your passion for dance and movement is obvious.”

“It has been so long since I have expressed myself this way. I believed for so long that my dancing led to…” Why had she brought up that night?

Because she had been triggered yet again. Why could she not keep the past in the past?

A sadness came over his face, and he pulled her close against his chest. “Stop worrying about it, darlin’. We took care of all three of them, remember? You’re safe here with me in our home.”

“I know. What I do not know is why thoughts of that night in the cantina keep interrupting my thoughts.”

“Sweet Pea, those bad memories will fade over time. Try to rid yourself of any guilt over that shit popping into your head, though. That night was a watershed moment in your life. Those thoughts are going to come up, especially now that you’re introducing activities into your life you had walled off after the rape—like dancing. By feeling guilt about it, you’re just giving them power over you again.”

She relaxed. Perhaps he was right. “How did you become so smart?”

She thought he might be flippant because of his modesty, but he surprised her. “I read a lot of how-to books on grieving and letting go of the hurts from the past. That piece of advice stuck in my head while I was trying to find a way to do the same over my own watershed moment.” He rubbed her cheek with his thumb. “I can tell you it takes a while to recognize that guilt in your thoughts, but I’ll try and help point it out if I know what you’re thinking. Just know this.
Any
time you want to dance, you just cut loose. I’m ready whenever you want—or here to encourage you to dance alone or with the animals if you’d like.”

She smiled as another weight was taken off her shoulders. “I do sometimes dance with O’Keeffe and the alpacas.”

“I’d like to see that sometime.”

“O’Keeffe really gets into it. Her head and tail move along with me as she lets the music sink into her bones, too. Now shall we continue with this dance, cowboy?”