He also felt no embarrassment in telling her that his mother died in a mysterious accident while visiting his father's family in Alabama. He openly told her that although it was never proved, most people believed that his paternal grandmother had pushed her down a flight of stairs because she couldn't believe that her handsome, educated black son had married such a homely piece of poor white trash.
Later, Butterbean remarked that Ellen had beautiful skin, and she briefly thought that he was giving her an actual compliment. Then he followed it up by stating that he normally did not date black women, but he made an exception in her case due to her light complexion. If things worked out the way he hoped they would, he told her he was sure they wouldn't end up with any tar babies for children.
The date went steadily downhill from that point as she struggled to keep from barfing while watching his atrocious table manners. Butterbean chewed his food with his mouth gaping wide open. The few times that he did close his mouth he smacked his big pink lips so loud the patrons at the next table could overhear the sound. As if he was down home on a farm in Kentucky, he took his bread and sopped up the sauce from his plate, then shoved it toward Ellen to take a bite. Declining, she glanced over at Jenise and Reggie to give them the signal that she was ready to leave, but they were too engrossed in each other to notice.
When it seemed to Ellen that things could not get any worse he decided to explain to her why he did not believe in God. Ellen was flabbergasted as the Web site they'd met on was supposed to be for Christian singles. Butterbean explained that he was not a Christian and he wholeheartedly did not believe that God existed. He felt the notion of someone being able to have three parts, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost, was absolutely ridiculous.
Although something inside her told her that she'd live to regret it, Ellen could not help asking why, if he felt that way, he joined a dating site for Christians. His answer was just the catalyst she needed to get up from the table and walk out on him. Grinning from ear to ear, he calmly stated that regardless of their religious fantasies, Christian girls were always the freakiest in bed. Ellen was surprised that she didn't leave skid marks on the floor as she rushed over to her sister's table and begged them to take her home.
Still laughing as she pulled into the parking lot of Cedric's catering, Ellen could not help but thank God that she had dodged that bullet and subsequently found Semaj, who was the love of her life.
“He's put on weight,” Jenise said. “Now the name Butterbean fits him perfectly.” Glad to see her sister finally smiling she reached for the car door.
They got out of the car and went inside. As soon as the clerk asked where Semaj was, Jenise noticed the cloud wash over her sister's face again.
“Um, he couldn't make it, but I brought my sister along to help me choose the menu.”
Noticing the look on her face the clerk did his best to reassure her. “That's fine. We've done tastings with all of the bridesmaids and both mothers. Wedding planning is usually a female thing. Don't let it bother you, honey.”
Ellen appreciated his encouragement, but it wasn't the fact that Semaj was missing the tasting that bothered her most. It was the fact that within a few shorts weeks she'd begun to wonder if the man she was about to marry was who she'd always thought he was.
It began with his mood changing drastically after his four-day disappearance. Then just when she thought things were back on track, they began to spiral out of control again. She'd noticed that he was always on edge and constantly taking phone calls that he didn't want her to overhear. A few of the times she'd noticed that the person on the caller ID was Semaj's cousin, Rip, and that worried her. Even though he claimed to be on the right side of the law since his shooting and subsequent hospital stay, Ellen remembered the Rip that used to rule the projects she grew up in with an iron fist and 9 mm gun. By that time, her parents had moved their family away from the projects and into a nice house in the suburbs, but Ellen had many friends and relatives who still resided there. They gave her information on the downward spiral the neighborhood was taking due to drugs, and she also knew who was responsible. Rip. Although he'd never gotten his own hands dirty, she knew he'd given the order that resulted in the shooting, stabbing, or beating of many of the residents of Sand Poole Manor.
For years, she'd blamed him solely for the demise of her cousin, Gigi. Of course, the police said that Gigi had died from a heart attack in an abandoned apartment that had become a crack house, but Ellen was well aware that it was prolonged use of cocaine that damaged her twenty-three-year-old heart. Even before her death, it pained Ellen and Jenise as they watched the little girl they used to play dolls with grow into a crack zombie, selling her body for one more hit. If it had not been for Rip and others like him, who sold their people's souls for a few dollars, Ellen was sure her cousin would still be alive.
When Semaj had told her during their first month of dating that he wanted her to meet his cousin and best friend, Marion, she had no idea that it was the notorious Rip from Sand Poole Manor. He was almost unrecognizable after the weight loss, but he confirmed during their first meeting that he indeed was the legend. Since that time, Rip had always treated her with respect, and she'd almost begun to actually look at him as a different person. That was, until Semaj began acting erratically every time his phone rang and Rip was on the other end. It also wasn't lost on her that when he'd disappeared and gone home to Andrus, S.C., Rip was the only person who seemed to know about it. In the past, their closeness had not bothered Ellen, but every time she prayed, the Spirit warned her that this was totally different. She knew what Rip was capable of, and it terrified her to think that Semaj now seemed to be his right-hand man.
“Ellen, who is this beautiful model you've brought with you today?” Cedric asked. He walked into the lobby area to greet them.
“This is my sister and matron of honor, Jenise Murphy.” She turned to her sister. “Jenise, this is the best chef in all of Atlanta, and my classmate from North Carolina A&T, Cedric Grier.”
Jenise extended her hand to Cedric and warmly shook it. “It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Grier,” she said.
“Call me Cedric, everyone does. Follow me, ladies.”
He took them into a room that looked like a private dining room. The round table was set with a white tablecloth and an emerald green lace overlay. In the center of the table was an eighteen inch tall vase filled with green apples, water, and a floating candle on top. The place setting was white plate with gold trim that Ellen and Semaj had chosen as their china setting. Around the table were two chairs with a white covering and an emerald green sash tied around the back. Ellen's mouth fell open, and she gasped with delight when she saw it.
“This is stunning!” Jenise said.
“I know that you only hired me to do the food, Ellen, but this is my vision for your reception décor. What do you think?”
Slowly, Ellen walked over to the table and traced her fingers along the silk tablecloth. Tears welled up in her eyes, and she turned to look at Cedric. “I think it's the most exquisite thing I've ever seen.”
Cedric beamed with pride. “Thank you. Now just let me get another chair and an additional plate. Is Semaj on his way?”
Once again Ellen's face fell as she remembered her fiancé and the way he'd been acting for the past couple of weeks. She looked at her sister, and then at Cedric. “Semaj is . . . I mean, he has been . . . I'm sorry you've gone to so much trouble. Everything is beautiful, and I'm sure the food tastes absolutely wonderful.”
The tears that had welled up in her eyes earlier began to fall down her cheeks. Cedric thought they were tears of joy, but Jenise knew better. She rushed over and put her arms around her sister. “Sissy, are you okay?”
“Take me home, Jenise,” she sobbed. “The wedding is off,” she said.
Chapter Ten
Reggie sat in the radio station lobby twiddling his thumbs impatiently as he waited for the receptionist to take him to the back for his appointment. He'd received a phone call from the DJ after he'd watched one of Reggie's videos on YouTube. He sent him a message asking him to stop by with a demo for him to listen to and to discuss the possibility of having Reggie's songs played on the radio. It was a small local radio station, but Reggie realized that Atlanta was a huge town that was home to hundreds of celebrities and even on a small station he could be heard by the right person.
He waited for more than an hour for the receptionist to return. He was beginning to feel discouraged when to his surprise and delight, the owner, Curtis Jansen, who was also the Sunday morning DJ, walked out the door with his hand extended.
“Reggie, it's a pleasure to meet the man behind the music. Your video was great, and I absolutely love the demo that you brought in. Come into my office and let's talk business,” he said.
The meeting went fabulously. Curtis told Reggie that he wanted to hear more of his music and he intended to feature him on the following Sunday's morning show. He also told him that he had recently purchased a small studio and was interested in starting his own record label. If he was willing, he wanted Reggie to be his first artist. Curtis believed that with Reggie's talent and the exposure he could give him on the radio station they were both sure to make a lot of money. Although they didn't sign anything, Reggie happily agreed, and Curtis advised that he'd be hearing from his attorney soon to finalize the agreement. An hour later, an elated Reggie rushed into their apartment filled with excitement.
“Jenise, Jenise!” he screamed.
He went into the bedroom, the bathroom, and the kitchen, but he still couldn't find her anywhere. “That heffa ain't never here when I need her,” he said to himself. He opened the refrigerator, pulled out a beer, twisted off the cap, turned it up, and reached in for another one to take with him to the living room. He got comfortable on the couch watching basketball and drinking beer while he waited for Jenise to return home.
The sound of Jenise opening the front door awoke him from his drunken stupor. He sat up and turned his wrist to check his watch. “Where you been, girl?” he demanded. “It's almost midnight.”
“Shhh, Aaliyah's sleeping,” she answered softly. Jenise was carrying her daughter in her arms. She walked past Reggie and took Aaliyah to her bedroom, then laid her down.
Reggie sat on the couch angrily awaiting her return. As soon as she entered the living room he began his tirade. “I asked you where you have been. Don't make me ask again,” he sneered.
“I told you earlier that I was going shopping with Ellen.”
“You've been gone all day and half the night. Do you think I'm stupid or something? The mall closed a long time ago. Anyway, if you went shopping where are your bags?”
As he continued chastising her like a little girl, his voice got louder and louder and the accusations flew right and left. Even though she had a reasonable explanation for every second of the time that she was gone, she'd learned a long time ago that there was no use in trying to explain that to Reggie. It seemed to her that hearing the truth only made him angrier, and she'd come to the realization that he didn't want the truth; he wanted to be right. If she explained her whereabouts, it would only prove his anger wrong, and the last thing Reggie wanted to be was wrong. Instead of further agitating him with a reasonable explanation, she decided to sit quietly and allow him to continue his rant in the hopes that he'd get tired of hearing himself yell and finally shut up.
Things had not always been so bad between them. Jenise began reminiscing about the good times with Reggie soon after learning her sister was engaged. While Ellen seemed to struggle with finding the right one before meeting Semaj, Jenise met Reggie her freshman year in high school and they'd been together ever since. Their initial meeting happened when they both auditioned for the high school Glee club.
Jenise's earliest memory of singing had been when she was five years old. Her mother often told the story to anyone who would listen. Deloris had been in the kitchen one Saturday evening preparing her Sunday dinner because she wholeheartedly believed in keeping the Sabbath day holy. Each Saturday evening she'd serve her family hot dogs, hamburgers, or some other meal that was easy to prepare; then she'd cook her Sunday dinner and place it in the refrigerator overnight. After the family attended church service on Sunday morning, she'd warm up the dinner in the oven, thereby not committing a sin by working on a Sunday.
That particular evening, Deloris was busy flouring chicken pieces for frying. Malcolm had taken Ellen across town to her weekly piano lesson, and Deloris and Jenise were alone in the apartment when she heard a small, yet strong voice wafting from the bedroom. She wiped her hands on her apron and went down the hallway to the girl's room. Inside, she saw Jenise had lined her collection of Barbie dolls and Teddy bears up as if they were a church choir, and she was their director. Without making a sound, Deloris listened quietly as her five-year-old daughter sang her favorite hymn.
“When I've gone the last mile of the way, I shall rest at the close of the day; And I know there are joys that await me, When I've gone the last mile of the way.”
Fighting back tears, Deloris could hardly believe how melodious the tones were. It astounded her that she knew all of the words, but it impressed her even more that Jenise hit each and every note with almost perfect pitch.
The next Saturday morning Jenise became the newest member of The Sunbeam Children's choir at their church. By the time she was ten years old, she was the featured soloist. Everywhere the choir sang people were in awe of the little girl with the big anointed voice. Jenise loved to sing. It made her feel appreciated, and it was the only time that people didn't point out how dark skinned she was. If she had her way, Jenise would have sung every word that she spoke because it was the only time that she believed that it made people look past her chocolate skin and actually see how beautiful she was inside.
By the time she was a freshman in high school, Jenise was a confident and strong soprano when she stepped in front of the judges and auditioned to join the Glee club. She'd stood in churches all over the state of Georgia and brought tears to the eyes of an entire congregation, so there was no doubt in her mind that she possessed the skills to be a member. All of her singing up until that point had been within the confines of her church at her parents' insistence, but she was ready to learn how to sing other songs beside hymns and spirituals. She knew that she possessed a God-given talent, but she also believed that by being a member of the Glee club she would receive the proper training that she believed that she needed in order to nurture that gift.
After her successful audition, Jenise decided to hang around and listen to some of the others who were also auditioning. Several girls squeaked out weak renditions of the latest pop songs. Jenise noticed that most of the guys still sang in a high register as their voices had not begun to change. Reggie Murphy was the last to step out on the stage. Jenise was not initially impressed. She felt that he was fairly cute, but way too skinny. However, when he opened his mouth to sing, she was not only overwhelmed with his lush bravado and perfect pitch, she was mesmerized by him.
The two of them began dating, and they often sang duets together at talent shows, showcases, and churches throughout their home state of Georgia, and they'd even traveled as far away as Virginia and Ohio. They had magic when they sang secular duets, but the anointing that poured down when they sang gospel was indescribable. Jenise loved the passion and power that Reggie had when he sang, and it wasn't long before both of them felt that same passion toward each other.
On her eighteenth birthday, Jenise discovered that she was pregnant. She'd suspected it for several weeks, but honestly believed that if she ignored it, that maybe it would not be true. She confided in her older sister, and Ellen accompanied her to a doctor who advised that she was already three months along. Crying in the car as they drove home, Jenise worried about how in the world she would be able to break the news to her parents. In less than a week she would be graduating from high school, and she'd already received an acceptance letter and a full scholarship from Spelman College's music department. Being devout Christians, she knew that her parents would be sorely disappointed.
Malcolm Winston's demeanor after hearing the news surprised everyone. Ellen suggested that Jenise tell both of her parents following dinner that evening, and she held her sister's hand while she spoke for moral support. They watched their father as Jenise shared her news, prepared to hear him yell, scream, or even cry, but no emotion showed on his face at all. Instead, he calmly walked into the kitchen, picked up the phone that was hanging on the wall, and called Reggie's father.
“May I speak with Reverend Clarence Murphy,” he said.
The two men spoke for less than ten minutes. As a result of their intense conversation, Jenise graduated high school, announced her engagement, had a bridal shower, and became Reggie's wife, all within the same month. Although Reggie fought it, his father demanded that he give up his plans to attend Julliard in the fall and do the right thing by Jenise. In exchange, he cosigned for the two of them to move into a nice two-bedroom apartment, bought them new furniture, and hired Reggie as his church's musical director. It didn't pay much, but it allowed him the free time that he needed to work on his other music projects. Jenise was disappointed that she would not be attending Spelman, but she reasoned that she had the rest of her life to go back to school. She'd begun to feel happy and excited as she anticipated becoming a mother.
For about three months the newlyweds led what Jenise believed was a happy life. Jenise took a job working in a call center for the local telephone company, and although money was tight she was happy and in love . . . until the night Reggie came home angry, drank six beers in less than a half hour, and she discovered the abusive man that she'd married. Throughout their courtship he'd never been mean, or sullen, and never violent, and even with the burning sensation that ran across her cheek when he slapped her, Jenise could not believe that he'd actually hit her.
Jenise blamed herself. She knew that Reggie liked to eat dinner before 7:00
P.M.
, and she was late cooking for him that night because she'd gone to the grocery store after work. He was absolutely right, she reasoned. If she managed her time better, it never would've happened, and if she made her husband happy, it would never happen again.
But it did happen again, later that same week. This time, Reggie was in a rage, and he didn't even need alcohol to fuel it further.
“I am sick of those idiots at my father's church,” he screamed as he stomped into the apartment and slammed the door.
“What happened?” Jenise asked. She was flabbergasted at how angry he seemed to be when he returned from choir rehearsal. Singing God's praises always made her feel happy and alive, and at one point in their lives she knew it did the same thing for him. But lately, it had seemed to have the opposite effect.
“We spent three hours rehearsing the same song, and they still couldn't get it right. I played their parts over and over and over again. The tenors couldn't remember it to save their lives. The altos were flat, and you know the sopranos can't carry a tune without you there to help them.”
By that time, Jenise was almost six months pregnant and after working all day she just couldn't find the energy to go to choir rehearsal. If she'd known how disastrous that one decision would turn out to be, she would have been the first person to arrive.
“I'm sorry, baby. I'll be there next week. I promise,” she said.
“Lorrelle tried to sing your solo, and it sounded horrible. I'm sick of dealing with that prima donna. Every note out of her mouth is flatter than ten dimes.”
At that point in her marriage Jenise had not learned the art of allowing Reggie to vent without her speaking. In her mind, she believed that if she apologized enough and made enough excuses for the other singers, he would calm down and listen, but she was wrong. While she was trying her best to explain that Lorrelle was recovering from a severe sinus infection that had adversely affected her voice, Reggie looked at her with a fire and rage in his eyes that she'd never seen before in her life. It was as if the fires of Hades had risen up in him and Satan now possessed his entire being. He drew his fist back and punched her with all of his might. Jenise had been standing in front of the couch, but the force of the blow threw her forward into the coffee table. As her stomach smashed against the wood, it shattered into a bunch of pieces and she fell facedown on the floor. Lying in a pool of her own blood she felt a tightening pain in her abdomen and she knew that something was terribly wrong. She waited for Reggie to ask her if she was all right and help her up. However, he merely turned his back to her, walked into their bedroom, and slammed the door.
Crawling across the floor, she managed to reach the phone and dialed 911. When the paramedics rang the doorbell, Reggie finally came out of the bedroom and peered through the peephole.
“Thank God, you finally got here. My wife tripped on the rug and fell onto the coffee table. Please help her,” he lied as he let them in.
Jenise knew that she should protest and tell them the truth, but at that moment, her only thought was for the safety of her unborn child. Correcting the paramedics could wait she thought as they turned her over.