Notorious (20 page)

“Mutual blackmail,” he said, his mouth twisting. “It’s not pretty, is it? Well, I have had enough of it, Susanna. It ends now.”

Susanna’s stomach dropped. She stared at him, disbelieving. “But Lady Emma—” she began.

She saw Dev smile. “I have been trying to see Emma for the past three days to tell her that I have reapplied for my Navy commission,” he said. “I’ve written to her.” He met her eyes. “I told her about us, Susanna. I told her I had been unfaithful. I fully expect her to break the engagement. So…” His smile deepened. “I fear you have no grounds left for blackmail.”

Susanna could feel everything slipping away. The fear grabbed her by the throat. “I don’t understand,” she said. “You have huge debts… And there is your sister to consider—”

Dev gave her a contemptuous look. “You did not have the slightest concern for Chessie before so do not pretend to any now.”

Susanna stared at him. There was something about his stillness and his quiet determination that told her that argument was useless. Dev had made his decision and he would not waver. There had always been a core of steel in him, she thought. It was not always apparent behind that careless exterior and the fortune hunter’s casual charm, but it was there. She had underestimated him and now she had no leverage, nothing. Dev would go to Fitz and tell him the truth and she would not be paid and she would not be able to provide for Rose and Rory and the whole terrible cycle of debt and despair would start all over
again. She felt so terrified that for a moment she could not breathe.

“Joanna and Alex will take care of Chessie,” Dev said. “Alex is not a rich man but he has always done his best for us. He will make sure Chessie is safe if I cannot.” For a moment Susanna could hear the self-loathing in his tone and knew how deeply Dev felt he had failed. “Meanwhile,” he added, “I shall do my best to regain some honor.”

His words were very final and she knew he meant them. The terror blocked Susanna’s throat and deprived her of words and she looked at him in silent horror and Dev looked steadily back at her and she knew she had lost.

“Devlin,” she said, and heard the despair in her own voice. “Please—”

Dev raised his glass of brandy. “Are you going to beg me not to give you away?” he asked. “That would be piquant, but I will save you the humiliation by telling you now that it would do no good. For too long I have done the expedient thing. I was in danger of losing my principles.”

Susanna closed her eyes, thinking of the twins, of the entire desperate fight for survival. Dev had no idea, she thought, what it was like to be alone and destitute. His childhood had been hard but he had risen above it. He was a man and men had always had the best chances. He thought that he was poor because he only had a knighthood and a ruined castle and no money. He had absolutely no idea what it had
been like to live cheek by jowl with eighteen others in a tenement with no food and no clothes and no bedding and no privacy and no money even to pay for a proper burial for her baby… He condemned her for the choices she had made and now he was going to send her straight back into that poverty, all for the sake of his honor and his principles. She felt sick and afraid and alone.

“Since you are clearly so desperate for the money,” Dev said suddenly, “you could always try to buy my silence with your body.”

Susanna caught her breath as his wicked glance raked her, lingering on the line of her mouth, dropping with explicit consideration to the curve of her breasts beneath the light muslin gown she wore. His eyes came up to meet hers and there was suddenly something so carnal in them that she thought she made a slight sound. He heard it, and smiled.

“I thought—” Susanna forced the words out “—that you were speaking of principle just now?”

Could she do it? she wondered as her mind spun, and hope and fear warred within her. Could she give herself to Devlin again to buy his silence, to seal their agreement? She was shaking at the mere thought. It was madness and yet the flare of heat under her skin, the warmth in the pit of her stomach, told her that she wanted it. She wanted him. She desired him shamelessly, without reservation and if it would buy her the future she so desperately needed then surely
that could not be so wrong. Nevertheless she was shaking at the thought.

Dev took her chin in his hand and turned her face toward the candlelight and she felt naked.

“It seems that my principles are very flexible when it comes to you,” he murmured. “I wish it were not so and yet…” he paused “…a part of me cannot regret it because I want you so.”

He kissed her and he tasted of heat and brandy and himself, a taste that was becoming so shockingly familiar and exciting to Susanna that it was like a drug. His tongue danced with hers, delving deep, searching and commanding a response from her. The lights swam and the room tilted as Susanna closed her eyes and abandoned herself to sensation.

“Well?” Dev said as he released her. His eyes were a very bright, very intense blue.

“Yes,” Susanna whispered. “I’ll do it.”

Dev paused and for a second Susanna wondered if she had surprised him, whether he had in fact had a higher regard for her than she had imagined and that he thought she would refuse to offer herself for his silence. The knowledge that he now thought her so venal was a bitter one, but there was nothing she could do. One night with Devlin to ensure he kept her secrets and ensure that she kept her future safe…

“I thought that you said you believed in fidelity?” Dev said. A sardonic smile tilted his lips. “Perhaps you believe in money more?”

It was just another betrayal but she nodded. She could not trust herself to speak.

“You’ll do it because the Altons are paying you a lot of money,” Dev repeated, “and you don’t want to lose it.” There was an ugly set to his mouth now. He stood up abruptly, his chair crashing back. “Come with me then.”

For a moment Susanna did not understand and then she realized the truth. He meant to take her here, now, upstairs in an inn chamber. A wave of heat and shame washed through her. Dev was holding out his hand to her. There was anger and amusement in his eyes and after a moment he said mockingly, “Have you changed your mind, Susanna? Is the price too high?”

Susanna stood up and put her hand into his. Her legs felt so shaky she thought she might fall. She felt sick. She hated herself. Sometimes she thought she could not bear the person she had become, compromising her morals and her principles simply because life had taught her the bitter truth that in order to survive she had to lie, steal and now even barter herself. But she had failed her own child. That grief never left her. She could never ever fail Rose and Rory, whom she had sworn to protect.

She forced the words out despite the tight fear in her chest. “No,” she whispered. “I haven’t changed my mind.”

D
EV HAD NEVER INTENDED
to do it. It had been a dare, a challenge, because he had been interested to see just how far Susanna would go. He had been furious with her for the callous way in which she had ruined Chessie’s hopes and the casual cruelty she had meted out to the other couples whose lives she had torn apart. But he was curious, too; he had seen the fear in her and the desperation, so at odds with her blatant claims that it was all for the money. She had tried to hide her fears from him but he knew her very well. So he had thought to push her as far as he could and force her to tell him the whole truth. Instead she had agreed to sleep with him in return for his silence so perhaps he had been mistaken after all and she was corrupt through and through, an empty soul within that luscious, tempting body, a woman willing to give herself in return for a fortune. Either way Dev was not really sure he cared, not if he could possess her again and make love to her with the same ravishing intensity he had experienced before and had ached for ever since.

“First room up the stairs on the left, sir,” the land
lord said in response to Dev’s urgent query. He had Susanna tightly by the hand; he was not going to let her run out on him now, not when his body felt so tight and primed and his need for her was so excruciating that he could barely see straight.

“Best make sure it’s empty first if you don’t want an audience or three or more in the bed,” the man added, with a leer.

Dev saw the color fade from Susanna’s face and her lips tighten. He could sense the hesitation in her; feel, too, the way that her fingers trembled in his as he drew her after him up the stairs. Her foot slipped on one of the steps. He swept her up and into his arms to prevent her from falling. She was light in his arms and her hair, scented with the honey and verbena that had haunted his dreams, brushed his cheek in the gentlest caress. The ache inside Devlin intensified, tightening like a vise.

On the small landing at the turn of the stair he put her down, turned her back against the peeling plaster wall and kissed her again. Her lips were very soft against his and her mouth opened readily to him and the taste and the essence of her swamped his senses. He wanted to take her right there, against the wall, pulling up her dainty muslin skirts and plunging into her and the fierce feral nature of his desire shocked him and warned him to rein himself in. He was almost out of control and he did not want that. If he were to have Susanna for one more night then he wanted to take pleasure in every moment.

Someone pushed past them, lumbering downstairs, and Dev thrust open the first door on the left and pulled Susanna inside. Here the roar from the taproom was muted and the only light came from a ridiculously romantic sickle moon that shone through the window and dappled the boards of the floor. The room, he was pleased to find, was a little less rank than might have been expected. The scent of lavender polish mingled with the dry smell of wood.

In the faint light he saw the shine of Susanna’s eyes—eyes, wide and dark, as she took in the small, sagging bed.

“I don’t trust you.” She sounded a little dazed as though she were as punch-drunk from the kiss as he. “How do I know that if I give myself to you, you will keep your word?”

“You don’t,” Dev said. He started to undress her; halfway through he lost interest and simply pulled the clothes off her regardless, dropping them on the floor, until she was standing naked in the moonlight. She made no move either to help him or hinder him but stood like a statue, her hands by her sides, her nakedness challenging him to touch her. He could hear her quick breathing and see the rapid rise and fall of her breast, more evidence that she was a great deal less confident than she had pretended to be. She must want the Altons’ money very, very much, Dev thought.

He started to kiss her. She pushed him away for a moment. “Promise me,” she said, and there was the
tiniest betraying quiver in her voice. “Promise me you will keep your word.”

“I promise,” Dev said. He would have promised her just about anything in that moment, feeling the warmth of her body pressed with such sinful seduction against his. The hunger roared through him again and he kissed her and felt her hesitant response, and kissed her again, softly, tenderly, running his tongue over her lower lip, courting a response from her. He thought for a moment that she might pull away from him and this would be when she lost her nerve, but then she gave a little broken gasp, and her need rose up to meet his and she twined her arms about his neck and gave him back kiss for feverish kiss. The triumph blazed through him. Whether it was for money or for pure lust, she was his this night. What did it matter if she was corrupt and dishonest through and through? She had a body made for sin and he would take it and tomorrow he would send her back to Fitz knowing that she bore the marks of his possession on her and that in truth she was his and his alone, because they were two of a kind and had always been meant to be together. The knowledge that Susanna was his—had always been his—sank into Dev’s soul and for a moment it felt as though his heart turned inside out. Then the thought was lost in the sleek heat and softness of Susanna’s body and he gave himself up to sensation alone.

S
USANNA HAD LEARNED
with a shock that it was not so difficult after all to give in to blackmail—not when
the man she was with was James Devlin and he was making the most delicious love to her and her body was singing with the pleasure of it and she thought for one moment that she might dissolve with pure bliss where she stood. It was appalling, wicked, to learn that she could do this when throughout her time as a heartbreaker she had prided herself on having some moral principles, chief amongst them the fact that she would never ever actually sleep with the man she was leading astray. But now, with Dev’s kisses on her throat, his mouth at her breast, she was a different creature entirely, her senses woken once more to Dev’s touch, entirely at his mercy.

Dev picked her up and put her down on the bed—the mattress seemed to sink a very long way, and she did, briefly, worry about fleas—but then Dev started to caress her with long, slow strokes that drove all thought from her mind. The insistent thrumming of her blood blotted out the sounds from the taproom below. She forgot the squalor of their situation as Dev’s touch became more purposeful, insistent, demanding her absolute surrender. He had long ago shed his clothes and the rub of his skin against hers was a torment and a delight. His mouth toyed with her breast, teasing her to a peak of need. Her body became flushed and heated, crying out for the fulfillment that he was denying her.

“What do you want, Susanna?” His whisper was low, carnal. “Tell me.”

Susanna hesitated. Was he going to make her beg
again—for his possession this time? She thought he probably was, and hated him for it even as she wanted to cry out to him to take her. He would like that, she thought, a streak of rebellion flaring briefly within her. He wanted to master her, to make her face the fact that he could command her body. Yet his hands were tender on her and his kiss drew out the pleasure between them to endless depths.

“What do you want?” She felt his breath against her lips, tasted the brandy again on his tongue as it flicked hers.

“I want to come.” The words were forced from her, reluctant words, words she wanted to deny him, hating herself now as well as him for admitting the hunger she had for him. She knew he would not give her what she craved.

“In good time.” His caress eased to the most light and teasing of touches, stroking up from the underneath of her breast to the very tip. The ache between her thighs intensified. She tried to think, tried to breathe, but all her attention was focused on the glorious need that coiled within her.

“I don’t want to wait.” Now she knew she was pleading and did not care. “Please. Devlin. I want to come—”

“You will.” His lips traced a path down between her breasts to the hot skin of her belly. His tongue curled into her navel then licked down over the curve of her stomach. “You can come as many times as you like for me.” His whispered words were like a heated
incitement. He slid a finger inside her, stroking her, stretching her. “Twice, three times, as often as you wish until you are sated.” He drew himself up until the tip of his penis replaced his fingers inside her. She reached for him but still he held back.

Susanna’s body shuddered, clenching tight. The low, lust-filled words had stirred her mind, the images rampaging through her head in erotic display.

“Would you like that, Susanna?” Dev’s voice was a low murmur. He moved inside her a tiny amount and she felt a hot rush of sensation. She was so close now and yet fulfillment shimmered frustratingly just out of her reach. She arched, trying to draw Dev in deeper, and in response he drew back and she felt angry and thwarted and almost driven insane with lust. She had never known that it could be like this—that she could be so utterly abandoned, wanton, so lascivious that she shocked even herself.

For a long moment they stared at one another and then he seemed to swoop down on her, kissing her deeply, and the fire rose in her again, burning up the last of her inhibitions. She felt him draw away a little and felt bereft.

In the dappled moonlight she saw him reach for his coat and take a small box out of the pocket. Dev flicked it open to reveal a huge pearl on a golden chain.

“Did you know—” his words were again a hot incitement “—that the touch of a pearl can be as soft as satin and yet as rough as sand?” He rolled it over
her nipples. They hardened to tiny tight nubs, the blissful friction making Susanna want to cry aloud.

“This was part of an Eastern prince’s treasure,” Dev continued in the same quiet voice. He drew the pearl on its golden chain over the curve of her breasts again and another cascade of pleasure rolled over her. The rasping smoothness licked across her skin like flame. Dev’s head was bent, his expression concentrated as he stroked the pearl down over her ribs, dipping it in an erotic circle into her belly button.

“I am told,” he said, “that it gives the greatest pleasure.” He paused, and the pearl rolled gently on its golden links across Susanna’s belly. “What do you think, Susanna?” he said. “Tell me.”

Susanna was incapable of forming even a single coherent thought. The pearl was tracing a low arc across her stomach now, rolling back and forth on its gold string. She knew that any moment Dev would take it lower, to find her most sensitive flesh. Her mind splintered at the thought.

“Do you like that?” Dev whispered as the pearl grazed her folds and she almost came off the bed in response.

“I… Ah…” Lush delight blocked Susanna’s throat. She felt the pearl against her nub, rubbing back and forth, and could not help raising her hips in involuntary plea. She heard Dev make a harsh sound of satisfaction and then he slipped the pearl deep into her sheath and drew it out slowly on the long chain.

The sensation was indescribable. Susanna shud
dered at the sheer voluptuous torment of it, feeling the pearl slip once again inside her and be drawn endlessly out, again and again, spinning her pleasure into something new and dark and sweet as it pressed down once more on the core of her. She arched up in ecstasy and Dev caught her as she came, his mouth plundering hers as the orgasm flowered through her, blazing in its intensity. He plunged into her, taking her with short, sharp thrusts that sent the wooden headboard of the bed crashing against the wall. She heard him shout, felt him tense and then she felt him drive deep into her one final time, spilling his hot seed inside her.

For a moment Susanna lay in utter bliss but all too quickly the raucous sounds of the alehouse penetrated her mind and wrenched her from her sensual cocoon, and then the shame and the humiliation rushed in on her. Everyone in the taproom would surely have heard the creaking of the bedsprings and the thud of the wood against the wall. Susanna’s body turned into one burning blush. How could she have been so lost to everything that she had responded to Devlin with such wanton abandon? Suddenly she felt tawdry and empty. The pearl… She shuddered with remembered passion, tainted now with an edge of mortification.

She had to get away. Away from this place, away from her shame, away from the powerful grasp Devlin held over her emotions. She sat up, searching for her clothes, throwing them on, dressing hap
hazardly and feeling the panic rise as she could not find her shoes for a moment.

“Susanna?” Dev sounded lazy, drowsy with pleasure. “Come back to bed.”

“Goodbye, Devlin,” Susanna said, reaching for the door handle, fumbling in the dark, desperate now to be away.

“Susanna!” Dev shot out of bed. Susanna had never seen a man move so fast. She certainly had not known a man could dress so fast. Navy training, she supposed; so very useful for a rake to be able to get in and out of his clothes so quickly. Damn him. She slammed the bedchamber door behind her and started down the stairs, stumbling a little in her haste. A second later the door slammed open and Dev was coming after her, fastening his pantaloons as he did so.

“Wait!” he said. “I wanted you for the whole night—”

“You did not say,” Susanna snapped. “You should be more specific in your blackmail in future.” She reached the bottom of the stairs and burst into the taproom. “You’ve had what you wanted,” she said, well aware that they now had a very large and very curious audience but so furious with both herself and with him that she was powerless to stop the words flooding out. “You’ve had me. Now I’m going.”

Several people whistled and catcalled.

“Looks like your technique needs more practice
mate!” someone shouted from the back of the room. Dev shot him a filthy look and caught Susanna’s arm.

“Susanna, wait—” he said.

“No,” Susanna said. She had reached the end of her endurance. The self-loathing washed through her, the hatred of all the lies and the deception and where they had brought her. She was afraid that she might cry. She could feel the burning tears sting her eyes. “You had better keep your promise, Devlin,” she said.