Off Her Game (19 page)

“I’m not ready yet, Nick.” She cleared her throat and deliberately changed the subject. “So, have you talked to Zoey since she went back to school?”

Nick grunted as he pulled a couple pint glasses from the shelf. “Last night. She yelled at me.”

“Why?”

“She says I’m being an asshole to Jen by not talking to her.”

“What do you think?” Val had to admit. She loved Nick, but he was being sensitive about it.

Nick stopped, glared at Valerie and shook his finger at her. “Stop analyzing me.”

“I just asked a question.”

“Whatever. Jen and I are done.” He walked over to the beer taps and poured two Shiners. He set them on the counter with more force than he’d probably intended. “She called my bar a rundown hole in the wall.”

“Really? You’re butt hurt over that?” Valerie laughed. “People have called you far worse things and you’re upset over that?”

“Fuck off,” Nick spat. Sullen anger slammed into his expression. Valerie sighed, regretting laughing at her best friend.

“I’m sorry, Nick. But it’s just a bar.”

“The Penalty Box isn’t just a bar.” He turned to face her. “I built this place. It’s mine. It’s part of me. Her saying that… “ Nick huffed. “I bought this place after Zoey’s mom left. It’s more me than I am.”

“So by insulting the bar, you feel like she insulted you?” Val’s heart softened, the beats getting slow and laborious. “That wasn’t her intention.”

“I know. But it’s not something I can forgive either.”

“Nick, is that really the problem?”

He narrowed his eyes. “Are you analyzing me again?”

“No. Just asking a question.” Val put up her hands in mock surrender. She’d much rather deal with Nick’s problems than her own.

“I don’t know.” He glanced over at the hockey players. “Want me to send Tiffany over there instead?”

“No.” Valerie shook her head like she was an automaton. Back and forth. Back and forth. “If I switch sections with her, they’ll know. That’s always my table.” Oh, how she wanted to do it, though. Seeing them reminded her too much of Darren. Seeing the striking Gavin reminded her of that first night at the yogurt shop when Darren had kissed her.

How far would it have gone that night if they hadn’t been interrupted? Would she have slept with him that night? Would she have let herself go so easily? Even posing the question she knew the answer.

She hadn’t possessed the capacity then to let loose and do things that would be fun and enjoyable. She was learning now. But she had months ahead of her before she’d be financially stable. But would she ever be at a place where she was truly happy?

***

Valerie approached the table with trepidation, holding three pint glasses that she set down slowly. She didn’t have to ask them what they were drinking. She already knew. Gavin was an import guy. He was especially fond of Foster’s. Misha drank anything with alcohol in it that was cheap. Leo was a Shiner fan. He didn’t come in nearly as much as the other guys did, but he was regular in what he chose.

None of that clear routineness of their drinking patterns soothed her nerves, however. They were still all Darren’s teammates and friends and she was still the woman who hurt him. Was she any different than Angela in their eyes?

The group’s attention turned to her and she swore they were already judging her. Gavin was the first to break the uncomfortable silence. “Hi, Val. How’s it hanging?”

“Good, actually. How’s your sister?” Gavin’s sister Maddie was a national figure skater. She’d been gone for months. But that was apparently normal. She traveled a lot to competitions.

“She’s good. Nationals are coming up. She’s been training hard.” Gavin grinned widely, obviously proud of the success his sister had experienced. “I didn’t think you would be working here anymore.”

“Just need to get some things under control first. I’m in my last two weeks.” That last part was a lie. She hadn’t given notice at all, but in her mind, this is what she believed. Nick was right. It was time for her to move on. The moving on part was scary.

“So you’re staying with the Highlanders?” Misha asked.

“Yeah,” Val replied. “Yeah, I think so.”

“Are you gonna talk to D about it?”

Valerie frowned. “I don’t think Darren should have anything to say about my career.”

“He might be upset.” Misha looked almost fearful. He was so young, he’d probably didn’t even shave yet. But the girls seemed to like that baby face.

“Hey, guys, I’m here for beer. Not to play matchmaker.” Leo told the other two, annoyed. He picked up the Shiner she’d set on the table and sipped, his eyes on the TV screen close by.

“You’re an ass, Vasquez.” Gavin snapped.

“You like it.” Leo grinned at him, and turned back to the TV. He kicked the back of Misha’s chair. “Move your big head, rookie.”

“Fuck off!” Misha replied.

Gavin rolled his eyes and turned back to Valerie. “So how are you liking the Highlanders? Didn’t know we came with our own drama, did you?”

Valerie laughed. “Everyone has drama. Otherwise, I’d never find a job.”

And she’d never have met Darren. Her heart clenched at the thought. She hated to admit it, but she missed the hell out of him.

The rest of her conversation with them was autopilot. Inside her head, all she could think about was Darren’s broad shoulders, the feel of his muscles tensed under her fingers as he reached climax. The warmth of his skin against hers.

Fuck, she was losing her mind to one tall, dark, and handsome man.

Darren was the last one to leave the locker room. He’d lost track of time after practice, between talking to the fans, the media, and the coach. But the good news was that he could take his time with a shower and he did. He sat down on the bench in his towel and sighed. Jenkins had given him another warning about his play. He couldn’t concentrate since that last conversation with Valerie. His focus was shot, his muscles were slow. He was making bad decisions out on the ice.

He had a new respect for Charbonneau now. The team captain had gotten a divorce as well, and he’d managed to keep it together, even as a single father, for years. And now his daughter had a child of her own… and they lived with him. But that was why Charbonneau was a legend in his own time.

The door to the locker room banged shut. He glanced up at the click of heels on the concrete, ready to tell the reporter to get lost. But it wasn’t a reporter.

When Valerie came around the corner, his mouth dropped open.

“Val.”

“Hi, Darren.” Her voice was magical, just the pitch of it lifting his mood. How did she do that? “I heard you were still here.”

“Yeah, I’m running late.”

He stood up and turned away from her. Anger. He needed anger. But he could never remain angry at her. She had that calming way about her. It drove him crazy.

“I wanted to say something.”

“Don’t think we have much to say,
chica
.”

“You were right.”

Darren stopped what he was doing. Right? Right about what? Curiosity getting the best of him, he turned around to face her, trying to ignore the beauty of her sad face, the smooth lines of her body in that pencil skirt… the way those heels lengthened her shapely legs.

“I don’t like to lose control.” Valerie bit her lower lip. “You make me lose control. I hate it.”

“Don’t I know it,” he growled. “You made that clear enough.”

“But at the same time, I love it.” She shook her head. “I don’t understand. I have this… split personality in my head.”

“They’re called emotions.” Darren’s voice was low to keep it from cracking with the intensity of the emotions swirling within him in that moment “They aren’t evil.”

“I hate feeling like this. I hate not knowing how my life is going to go. But then I think of you, and I can’t help but smile.”

“I’m not going to let you string me along, Val. You have to decide.” He stepped toward her, the floor cold on his feet. The air was drafty, but his body was warm. “You either want to be with me, or you don’t.”

“I-I don’t know.”

“Then we don’t have anything else to talk about.” He turned away from her. The action physically hurt. It wasn’t the sore muscles from his workout or anything else he’d done that day in practice. No, turning away from Valerie Chase made his blood freeze and his heart ache.

“I mean… I shouldn’t want to be with you. Relationships are chaotic, unordered messes. And the way I feel…”

He faced her again. “What do you feel? Do you feel anything?”

“I’m falling in love with you, Darren.”

The blunt way she spoke was like a puck to his chest. Of all the things he’d thought he’d hear from her, this wasn’t it. Love? She loved him? Did he love her? His mind doubted her, but his soul bellowed for her.

He crowded her, using his large body to push her up against the wall. She clenched her jaw, and he wanted to lick her jawline. This near to her he was, he could smell the vanilla perfume wafting from her.

“Do you know what love is, Valerie?” He kept his voice low and rumbling, leaning in to her ear to speak. “Love is heartbreak. Love is torture. Love is chaotic.”

She closed her eyes, breathing in deeply. When she opened her eyes, his dick jerked under his towel. Fire and ice mixed together in those chocolate eyes.

He covered her mouth with his, sliding his tongue between her lips. Her body melted into his, allowing him to press his full length against her.

A soft moan slipped from her lips as he tangled his fingers in her brown curls, gently massaging her. His erection strained between them and suddenly the towel was too rough, too tight.

When they broke for air, he needed more. There was an expectant air between them. She’d made her decision and he was more than on board with that. He wanted her now, his body winding itself tighter than an overblown balloon. Any moment now, he was going to pop.

He trailed kisses along her neck, reveling in the softness of her skin, the warmth that radiated from her. He pressed his pelvis against her, letting her feel what she had done to him. A low moan rumbled from her throat.

He slid his hands over her shoulders, his fingers just inside the jacket. With a twist of his wrists, he shifted the garment back, letting it drop from her body to the ground. He wanted her to feel what he felt, to know what it was like to love someone.

“Darren…” she whispered into the echoing air of the locker room. Her leg lifted from the ground, wrapping around one of his, as if she were trying to get him closer.

With achingly slow, stumbling fingers, he unbuttoned her blouse, each button revealing more of her smooth skin. The swells of her breasts lifted and fell with her heavy breathing. He leaned over her, kissing the top of them as he pulled each breast from their resting place inside her bra.

Another moan escaped her lips when he took a pink nipple into his mouth. She thrust out her chest, her fingers tangling in his wet hair.

“What do you want, Val?” he whispered as he straightened. He ran his tongue along her earlobe. “Do you know what you do to me?” He took her hand and slid it down his stomach, over the towel to his cock. . The ache of his balls intensified, growing heavier.

“What would you do if I decided to do you right here? Right where anyone could walk in?” Her head fell back as he spoke, as if his voice coaxed the turmoil he saw in her.

He smoothed his hand over her thigh, under the skirt until it was bunched around her waist. Her panty-clad ass nearly had him coming right then. God, but he loved her ass. He loved everything about her. Her soft, dark hair. Her gorgeously smooth skin. The round globes of her ass against his palm.

He dug fingertips into her flesh, holding her in place as his other hand pushed her panties to the side, and dipped into her sweet depths. Her arousal coated his fingers. God, he wanted her.

She had her own ideas as well. She pushed the towel from his body, letting his erection free. She started stroking him, and his brain shut down.

He kissed her, forcing his tongue into her mouth like he wanted to do with his cock while she stroked him. His hips moved of their own volition, thrusting into her hand. Pleasure ripped through his body. If she didn’t stop, he was going to come.

Reluctantly, he stepped away. She tried to follow, but he grabbed both her wrists and pinned her to the wall. Her breathing was jagged, mirroring his.

The two stared at each other, stunned into lusty silence. His erection pressed between them, the feel of the soft fabric of her tousled blouse sliding along his shaft.

Suddenly, he was very aware that he was naked, pressed against her like a rabid animal. But he was not going to fuck her in a dirty locker room. He was not going to take an intimate moment and turn it into some cheap trick in a locker room. She deserved so much better than that.

“I have a game tonight.” The words poured out of his mouth. “Will you come to the game?”

“The game? That’s what you’re thinking about now?” Her cheeks flushed, whether from anger or arousal, he wasn’t sure.

“Actually.” He leaned in, brushing his lips across her cheek. “I’m really naked and hard right now, but I don’t want to fuck you against a wall, especially when I don’t have any protection with me. So yeah. The game.”

Her anger softened its edges, her shoulders relaxing slightly. Her chest heaved, the swells of her breasts rising and falling with her breath.

Silence was the response, and he couldn’t read what was going through her head. Instead, he stepped away from her, retrieving the towel from the floor to cover himself.

“What are we doing here, Darren?” The stunned look left her face. Slowly, she began to pull herself back together. She smoothed her skirt down, and buttoned her shirt back up.

Darren sighed. “I want you, Val. I want you for more than a night, more than warmth in the bed. You and I? This isn’t a casual thing. It can’t be.”

“Can we even do that?” She shook her head. “Professionally, this is a nightmare.”

“It doesn’t have to be.” To be honest, he wasn’t all that sure. All he was sure about was that he needed Val. “Just come to the game tonight?”