Not that Aiden was thinking about the future. He'd always been a man to live in the moment, to take an impulsive leap, and she'd always been someone to weigh the pros and cons before she acted.
There was desire in his eyes, and she was old enough to know when a man wanted to kiss her. She wasn't imagining it this time—was she?
"You're thinking really hard, Sara," he drawled, his hands coming to rest on her waist.
She caught her breath at his touch, her mind suddenly spinning. All sense of reason and logic was being crowded out by the sheer desire.
"Sara?" he said.
"Just kiss me already."
She'd barely gotten the words out when his mouth covered hers. His lips were warm, firm, and while the kiss started out soft and tender, it quickly changed to hard and passionate. He pulled her up against his chest, and she went into his embrace willingly. She opened her mouth under his, taking his tongue inside, loving his taste, his touch, the softening of her body against his hard angles.
The kiss was better than her fantasies, better than her memories, and she didn't want it to end, didn’t want to have to talk about it, explain it, or rationalize it. She just wanted to feel his heat, to be a part of him the way he'd always been a part of her.
Somewhere in her brain, she knew she needed to be the one to pull away, to say no, to end the kiss. She couldn't let Aiden be the one—not again.
But it was so difficult to find the right moment to end it.
Then voices penetrated the thick fog of passion. Loud voices.
She pulled away, as two teenage couples came down the path. They had their arms around each other and were passing a bottle of alcohol back and forth between them. They barely glanced at them as they passed.
Sara let out a breath. She should have been grateful for the interruption, but she wasn't.
"Sara," Aiden began.
She immediately shook her head. "Don't say anything, please."
"I didn't mean—"
"Aiden, stop. Let it be. It was just a kiss. Don't make it into anything else. We should go back to the car."
"Are you sure you don't want to talk—"
"I don't. I really, really don't." She moved out of his embrace and started walking down the path.
Thankfully, Aiden followed. The drive home was made in silence. But when Aiden parked in front of her dad's house and turned off the engine, he stopped her from getting out of the car. "Wait, Sara."
She waited, but now that he had her attention, he didn't seem to know what to say.
"It's not a big deal," she said, breaking the silence. "We got caught up in the moment. And now the moment is over. It was just a kiss," she repeated, silently willing that to be true. "I don't have a crush on you anymore, if that's what you're worried about."
"I don't want to hurt you."
She stared back at him. "I don't intend to let you." And with that, she got out of the car and walked into her father's house, resisting the urge to look back.
Chapter Thirteen
After a sleepless night, Sara got up Sunday morning just after seven, threw on sweats, grabbed her keys and phone and went for a run. About a half mile into her jog, she remembered that she really didn't like to run, but she needed to find a way to burn off the restless energy that had been building since she'd kissed Aiden. She should have followed Emma's advice and stayed away from him. Instead, she'd gotten caught up in his sexy charm and let her inner teenager take over.
Today, she would get back to business. She needed to make some decisions. It wasn't like her to be so indecisive but things had changed a lot since she'd first made her weekend getaway plans. She still had a flight booked for six o'clock in the evening. She could get on it, go back to New York, and the life she'd built the last seven years. Or, she could stay in San Francisco and…
What?
Help her father when he clearly didn’t want her assistance?
Get further involved with Aiden, who would no doubt disappear as soon as he came out of the fog of grief he was living in?
The only reason he'd turned to her was because he didn't want to get his family involved in his problems. He had not suddenly discovered that she was irresistible.
Although, it was fun to imagine that Aiden now thought she was beautiful, sexy and desirable. Wasn't that just the ultimate revenge? The nerdy girl turns into a swan and the sexy bad boy finally sees her for who she really is?
Unfortunately, her revenge would have worked better if she hadn't kissed him again, if she'd been as untouchable and unattainable as he'd once been for her. She really needed to stay away from him.
Too bad, he lived just next door.
Right now, he was probably in bed, maybe wearing nothing…
She'd seen him with his shirt off, and his muscled arms and rippling abs were a thing of beauty, not to mention the fine dark hair that ran along his chest and down toward the waistband of his jeans.
She cleared her throat, not wanting to think of Aiden naked, but she couldn't help herself. His teenage body had been impressive, but years of physical demanding work had turned him into a rugged, sexy male, and she was more than a little attracted him. Last night, she'd gotten so caught up in kissing him, if he'd thrown her down in the sand, she would have had sex with him on the beach and not even considered where they were or how cold it was. When she was with him, she was always hot.
But he wasn't always as hot for her, she reminded herself again.
Damn! This run wasn't working at all. She might be sweating, but she still had way too much time to think. Turning toward home, she picked up the pace, sprinting when she reached her street. As she neared her house, she saw Emma on the sidewalk. She was talking to a guy who appeared to be in his mid-thirties. He had blonde hair and was dressed in khaki slacks and a dark brown sport coat. Judging by Emma's stiff posture, the conversation didn't appear to be friendly. And as she drew closer, their raised voices were impossible to ignore.
"I told you I don't want to see you anymore, Jon," Emma said. "It's done. We're over. Accept it and move on."
"You have to give me another chance. This wasn't all my fault."
She shook her head. "You've had all the chances I can give you. Just go, please."
"Em, baby."
"Stop! I'm not your baby. I'm not your anything. We were not good together. You're just feeling lonely. You miss having a girlfriend, but it's not me you miss."
"That's not true."
"It is true, and we both know it."
Emma turned to go, but the guy grabbed her arm.
Sara ran over to them. They looked at her in surprise. "Everything okay?" she asked.
"It's fine," Emma said, pulling her arm free. "Jon was just leaving."
"We're not done talking," he protested. "I know I hurt you, but you hurt me, too."
"I'm not doing this with you. I've said all I had to say. Go home."
Jon gave her an angry glare. "You can be such a bitch." He strode to his car, got in and pulled away, the tires squealing.
Sara looked back at Emma and saw her mouth tremble just a little before she quickly forced back the emotion. "Who was that?" she asked.
"My ex," she said. "Jon Wickmore the third."
"Did he hurt you?"
"Not today," she said with a humorless laugh.
"But before…"
"He didn't hit me," Emma said. "He just cheated on me. We'd been living together for almost a year, and I had no idea that when I was at work, he was sleeping with other women. Of course he's sorry now, but I'm not going back to him, because the cheating wasn't the whole issue. He didn't like my job. He thought I put it before him, and to be fair, I did sometimes. Anyway, it's over."
"It sounds like it's for the best."
"I think so." Emma gave her a painful smile. "I just thought I was in love with him, that's before I saw him for who he really was. I was too caught up in lust and passion to see what was right in front of me. I won't make that mistake. That's why I've sworn off men for at least a year." She paused, her gaze narrowing as she noted Sara's sweat pants. "So, you're a runner now? Aren't you the girl who would use any excuse to get out of P.E.?"
"I don't like to run, but I try to get in a little exercise because I spend so much time sitting. And I'm coordinated enough to put one foot in front of the other. All those other sports that involve balls and rackets and clubs are not for me."
"You should have called me. I would have gone with you."
"It was a spur of the moment decision."
"What happened with Aiden last night?"
"Nothing," she said quickly.
"Really?" Emma gave her a suspicious look. "Then why are you blushing?"
"I'm just red from my run."
"I know you two didn't come home right away, because Aiden's truck was not here when I got back from rescuing Shayla."
"We took a drive. We talked. That's it. There's nothing else to say."
"Got it. So what are you doing today?"
"Trying to decide whether or not I should go home."
Emma's brows knit together in a frown. "Let me make that decision for you—don't go. We're just getting reacquainted. I don't want to say goodbye yet."
"I'd love to stay a few days," she said slowly. The idea had been going around in her head for most of the last twenty-four hours "But then I think what's the point? My dad doesn't want me here. He wants me gone."
"Screw what he wants. He's going to be in the hospital for a while anyway, so it's not like you'll be tripping over each other."
"That's true."
"He should be happy the house isn't sitting empty."
"I'm not sure happy is an emotion my father feels very often." She paused. "I sometimes wonder if he has any friends. I know he has colleagues at work and he spends most of his time there, but have you ever seen anyone at his house? Does he ever have any parties, barbecues, or people over for dinner?"
"My mom has asked him to come over to our house a few times and he always declines. I've never seen any party action."
"It's weird to think anyone would be happy being that alone."
"Your father is just different, Sara. I obviously don’t know him as well as you do, but he just seems like a shadow of a person."
"That's a good way to put it," she said.
"So think about staying. It would be fun to have you around. We can call Julia and Kristine. They'd love to see you," Emma added, referring to some of their old friends.
"I haven't talked to them since high school."
"They're actually nicer now," Emma said.
"I'll think about it. What are you up to today?"
"The family is heading to church in about an hour. You could come with us. And then join us for the traditional Callaway Sunday lunch."
"Your family still does that?" she asked in surprise. The Callaways had always invited family and friends to come for lunch after the noon service at St. Andrews. It was a long-honored tradition.
"It's not as big of a crowd as it used to be, but there's always good food. If you don't want to join us for church, just come for lunch. Aiden might be there," she added with a twinkle in her eye.
"That's not necessarily a plus," she said dryly.
"Oh, I'm betting it is," Emma said with a laugh. "I never totally understood your crush on my brother, but last night, for the first time, I saw Aiden look at you the way you always looked at him. Maybe think about that while you're deciding whether or not to make that flight tonight."
* * *
Sara couldn't help but think about Emma's words. They ran around and around in her head. She'd seen that same look in Aiden's eyes, but it was nice to have it confirmed by a third party. But she didn't know what to do about it. Should she stay in San Francisco for a few more days? See where things went with Aiden? Spend time with Emma? Maybe try to have another conversation with her dad?
Or should she go back to the life she knew, the one she excelled in, the one that was a little bit lonely? If it was lonely, she only had herself to blame. She couldn't make friends in the outside world if she never left her cubicle. She didn't need to move back to San Francisco to make some changes.
Frowning at the chaotic confusion in her head, she distracted herself with more immediate work. She grabbed a half dozen garbage bags and headed into the kitchen to start the cleanup. When they were full, she realized she'd barely made a dent. But it was a start.
When the lingering stench of smoke got to be too much, she went upstairs and jumped in the shower. She'd always done some good thinking in the shower, but she was still dithering when she stepped out, toweled off and dried her hair. She put on some clean clothes and then stared at her open suitcase. She could pack, or she could unpack.
Maybe she should toss a coin. It was not a bad option. She certainly wasn't going to ask her father again. He'd made his viewpoint clear yesterday. So if she didn't stay for him, then who was she staying for? Aiden?
That was crazy. She could not turn her life upside down for him.
She just wished the taste of his mouth didn't still linger on her lips.
Shaking her head, she told herself to stop it, and looked for another distraction. She found it in the box of photographs she'd discovered in the basement. Maybe she should go through those, find a couple that she really wanted and take them back to New York with her.
Happy to have some sort of a plan, even if it was a short-term activity, she grabbed the box, plopped it in the middle of the bed and sat down.
The first few pictures she found were from her elementary school years. She'd been such an awkward child, braces on her teeth, hair that never parted evenly, pale skin from all the time she'd spend indoors, her nose buried in a book.
She caught her bottom lip between her teeth as she pulled out a photo of her and her mom when she was about five years old. She had her hand in her mother's, and it was clear she was holding on tight. She looked like she was about to cry, and her mother was trying to reassure her. She wondered who had taken that photo, and if it was her father who'd made her cry.