One Indulgence (35 page)

I’m a coward.

RICHARD SURFACED IN the shallows to see Henry trudging up the shore toward the blanket. His heart dropped. The whole thing had been a stupid idea! What could he have been thinking? This was their first holiday together. There would be so many more. He should have waited! And yet he still wanted it. Here. The idea had occurred to him back in London and had occupied his thoughts night after frustrating night. It wasn’t just about having Henry, which he could do quite easily in the house. It was about letting go.

He emerged from the water in all his naked glory and headed straight for his pile of clothes on the blanket. Henry was already seated close to the edge in his wet smallclothes, his elbows resting on his bent knees.

“The view is amazing, isn’t it?” Henry said.

Richard glanced toward the horizon just before the meaning hit him, and he whipped his head back. “Oh, you think so?” he drawled, tension pulling at his groin.

Henry turned his head and rested it on his crossed forearms. There was something tense and vulnerable in his expression, as if he was self-conscious.

“I do think so,” Henry said quietly.

Richard watched Henry closely, trying to read more in his far-off expression. What he saw was worry and embarrassment. Richard dropped the clothing he had just picked up and moved to the middle of the blanket. The grass was thick and lush beneath, making a perfect seat. It would make an even better bed.

“Come back farther so you can put your feet on the blanket,” Richard said, patting the place beside him.

“My drawers are still wet. I don’t want to soak the blanket,” Henry muttered, turning his eyes back toward the lake.

Richard shook his head, even though Henry could not see it. He had seen the look in Henry’s eyes mere seconds ago, the sheer hunger. Richard refused to let it be suppressed. He crawled across the blanket and came to sit behind Henry, his legs bracketing him until Richard was able to press his chest flush against Henry’s back. Richard wrapped his arms around him.

“Rich,” Henry gasped.

“If your drawers are still wet, you can simply take them off,” Richard whispered against his ear.

Henry muttered several false starts, his worries and objections refusing to form into words. Eventually, he ran a hand through his half-dry hair and looked down.

“I know I’m not very adventurous,” he muttered.

What?
Richard leaned to the side so he could see Henry’s face. “Hey. Hey, look at me,” he said, cupping Henry’s jaw and gently turning his face. His expression was anxious. “I don’t need adventurous, Henry. That’s not what this is about.”

“It’s not?” Henry swallowed hard, uncertain.

“No. It’s about… I just want to be free. I was to
feel
free, even for a little while.” The intensity in Richard’s voice surprised him, but Richard felt his words were true. He rubbed his thumb across Henry’s cheek, their eyes locked. “We’re seven miles from the nearest neighbor, almost four miles from the nearest road. We’re safe here. You know I would never do anything to endanger you. Us. No matter how much I wanted something, I wouldn’t if it was dangerous. That day we were at Tattersalls, I-I just…”

“I KNOW,” HENRY said, stopping him. He covered the back of Richard’s hand and nuzzled against it. All the tension and anxiety fell away from him so quickly that it was startling. He absolutely believed Richard. He
would
never do anything to endanger them. That first night Richard had told him he was safe with him, and he had believed it even then.

And he also wanted to feel free.

“Come here,” Henry said just before he slid his hand to the back of Richard’s neck and pulled him down. Their lips crushed together. Richard pulled Henry back until he was leaning against Richard’s chest; Henry’s head tilted back on Richard’s shoulder as Richard used his tongue to explore every inch of Henry’s mouth.

The world really did seem to slip away and yet still be there just enough for Henry to feel the breeze and the warm setting sun on his skin. Henry was amazed at how he could have thought of refusing that kind of freedom. All those weeks of dark, quiet rooms, of being sure to leave parties at the same time so they could spend twenty minutes together in a carriage—

Henry turned and wrapped his arms around Richard. He hardly meant for Richard to lose his balance and fall backward, nor had he meant to go tumbling down on him.

Richard’s surprised grunt transformed into a laugh.

“Ah. Sorry.” Henry chuckled, but when he tried to right himself, Richard wrapped his arms around Henry and rolled. Blades of grass poked through the blanket here and there, tickling Henry’s back, but he hardly cared. He was too busy moving his lips over Richard’s chest and the beads of water that still clung to him.

“My God, I’ve wanted this.” Richard groaned as Henry laved his tongue over one of Richard’s nipples. “Every damn day we rode in the park.”

Henry chuckled. “I can imagine the ladies and gentlemen on their daily promenade wouldn’t have approved of such a use of the lawn.”

“Hang them.” Richard grunted. He drew back onto his knees and ran his hands down Henry’s sides and under to his back. The pressure was enough of a cue. Henry rolled onto his stomach, his now painfully hard erection pressed against the soft blanket. Richard’s hands glided up and down his back, pressing into the muscles still tense from their long journey.

“Ah!” Henry groaned. “That’s amazing.”

“That is nothing,” Richard replied with meaning.

His hands disappeared, but a second later Henry felt teeth nibble the flesh of his arse. He yelped and twisted around, shock on his face. Richard wagged his eyebrows and grinned.

“It’s not my fault you look good enough to eat,” Richard teased. “Or that you taste wonderful.”

Taste. Henry’s mouth watered just before he darted his tongue across his lips. If Richard had been fantasizing about them on a blanket in the warm sun, Henry had been spending his nights dreaming, wondering what it would be like to
taste
Richard. He had even almost suggested when they had been alone one night in a carriage…

“Stand up,” Henry said as he twisted around and onto his knees. When Henry sat on his haunches and gave Richard a scorching look, he thought there was no misunderstanding his intent.

Richard’s jaw fell open, much to Henry’s delight, and he stood in a clumsy rush, his feet just bracketing Henry’s knees. His hard length twitched at the proximity to Henry’s pink lips, forcing Henry to stifle a nervous laugh. Henry’s bravado faltered a bit as he wrapped his fingers around the base of Richard’s erection. He had never done this before, but the weight and heat in his hand made his urge increase.

“If you say you think you won’t be good at it, save your breath,” Richard said with a shaky laugh. “I’m already so close I’ll probably embarrass myself.”

Henry bit his lip against a laugh, then leaned forward. He ran his tongue hard and flat up the underside of Richard’s shaft, then stopped to swirl his tongue over the flushed head and the salty bead of fluid that had already formed there.

RICHARD SHUDDERED AND grasped Henry’s shoulders. He instinctively reached to cup the back of Henry’s head but stopped himself. No, not the first time. He would have to maintain some control. Henry had never sucked a man off before, and Richard didn’t want him to have a bad experience—

“God!” Richard cried as sweet pleasure coursed up his shaft and seemed to vibrate over every inch of his back. Henry’s cheeks were drawn in as he sucked more than half of Richard’s length deep into his mouth. He swirled his tongue against the sensitive underside of the ridge, drawing even more desperate groans from Richard’s chest.

He watched Henry in awe. Everything about Henry—the way he ran his hands up and down Richard’s thighs, the way he tilted his head to take as much of Richard in his mouth as he could, and the way he moaned with obvious pleasure, sending shocking vibrations though Richard’s body—all of it nearly sent Richard reeling.

“Ah! God! Enough!” Richard cried, pushing back. Henry looked up at him, his wet, swollen lips slightly parted. It had to be the most beautiful thing Richard had ever seen.

“I think you’ve ruined any hope of me taking things slowly,” Richard said, once again with that shaky laugh.

Henry licked his lips. “Good.”

Richard dropped to his knees and pulled Henry into a scorching deep kiss. He could taste the tangy flavor of himself on Henry’s tongue, which only increased his urgency. He pressed on Henry’s hip, encouraging him to turn around.

Henry didn’t seem to need the encouragement as he turned on his hands and knees. There was hardly a more exposed position a person could take, yet Henry did not appear to feel anxious, and he looked back over his shoulder and smiled. It was a sheepish smile, yes, but not at all afraid.

Henry leaned forward on his elbows until his forehead nearly touched the blanket. He arched his back, lifting his hips in an invitation that left Richard struggling to breathe. He had to, however, just enough to clear his head and remember that canvas bag nearby. He reached for it, dumping the towels and the extra clothes he had brought until he found what he needed. A small corked bottle of oil landed on the blanket.

Henry chuckled. “Certain, were you?”

“My arrogance knows no bounds.” Richard uncorked the bottle and poured a good amount into his palm. He gasped and tensed as he stroked the slick oil over his length. His fingers still thoroughly slick, he ran them down the open crease of Henry’s arse, stopping at his entrance.

Henry moaned at just that little bit of contact. Richard had not been lying about his inability to go slowly. He pushed a slick finger inside, then two, forcing Henry to press his mouth against his clenched fists as if trying to hold back his moans. Neither of them was going to last long, but it didn’t matter. They had a week. A whole week of each other, uninhibited.

“Are you ready?” Richard said, his voice strained.

“Yes, yes,” Henry gasped.

Richard held Henry’s hip steady as he brought himself against Henry’s entrance. He gritted his teeth against the urge to snap his hips forward and bury himself in one sharp thrust. Instead, he pressed forward smoothly, stopped for a few moments, then continued. Henry arched his back farther, and just as Richard was prepared to draw back a little to give him time to adjust, Henry bumped back, taking all of him.

“Ah!” Henry moaned. “Yes!”

Richard’s head was swimming. The very beginnings of his release lingered on the edge, but he forced it down. He leaned forward and curved his arm under Henry’s stomach. He pressed his lips to Henry’s back.

“You are more than adventurous enough for me,” Richard whispered. “You’re going to kill me.”

Henry laughed against his fists, which were still clenched against his mouth. He pressed back again and shifted his hips, pulling a grunt from Richard. Richard needed no further encouragement. He set his hands on Henry’s hips, his grip firm as he began to thrust in a smooth, delicious rhythm. It did not take long, though, before his grip and his thrusts became downright possessive.

“HUH! AH!” HENRY cried out as Richard’s thrusts picked up speed, sending wave after wave of pleasure over him, pushing him ever closer to the edge. He moaned again and clamped his lips shut, pressing them into his hands.

“No, don’t hold back,” Richard gasped. “I want to hear you.”

Richard snapped his hips, sending a brutal yet amazing shock through his very core. Richard did it again and again, until his rhythm was almost punishing.

“Yes, yes! Rich!” Henry extended his arms and clawed at the blanket and the soft grass beneath. It was too much but so perfect. There was pain in the pleasure, and yet that only seemed to increase his hunger for it. He met Richard’s thrusts with equal vigor until he could feel there was no holding back. Stars danced across his eyes.

“Yes! Give it to me!” Richard growled. “Now!”

Pleasure pooled at the base of Henry’s spine, then seemed to explode everywhere at once. He groaned out in an unintelligible mix of words as he came, his seed spilling onto the blanket below.

HENRY’S RELEASE RACKED Richard’s whole body, causing him to follow almost instantly. He drove deep as he came, wrapping his arms around Henry’s waist and pulling him close.

“I love you,” Richard gasped. “Goddamn it, I love you.”

Henry reached back as best he could and stroked Richard’s arm. “I love you too, Rich. Thank God I found you.”

Richard reluctantly pulled his weight from Henry’s back and guided him to stretch out on the rest of the blanket. Richard lay beside him and reached up to brush the untamed golden curls away from his forehead. They did nothing for several minutes but stare at each other and catch their breaths. The sun had just set in the distance, putting the world into that dreamlike time of vibrant colors. All the greens were temporarily greener, all the blues that much bluer.

Henry licked his lips as if he meant to say something, but he merely smiled and settled his head on Richard’s shoulder. Richard began to idly twist his fingers over Henry’s curls, seeing if he could tame them, then smiling when it was obvious he could not. The world was perfect. Everything was so utterly perfect.