Out of the Blue (20 page)

Read Out of the Blue Online

Authors: Helen Dunmore

We are men, not beasts

though we fall in the dark

on the rattlesnake’s path

and flinch with fire of fear

running over our flesh

and beat it to death,

we are men, not beasts

and we walk upright

with the moss-feathered dark

like a shawl on our shoulders

and we carry fire

steeply, inside a cage of fingers,

we are men, not beasts
,

and what we cannot help wanting

we banish – the barn yawn, the cow breath,

the stickiness we come from.

Index of titles and first lines

(Titles are shown in italics, first lines in roman type.)

  • A candle for the ship’s breakfast,
    225
  • A cow here in the June meadow
    ,
    63
  • A cow here in the June meadow,
    63
  • Adders
    ,
    204
  • A draught like a bony finger,
    51
  • A dream of wool
    ,
    138
  • A fat young man in
    BERBER’S ICE CREAM
    PARLOUR
    ,
    184
  • After a night jagged by guard-dogs and nightingales,
    168
  • After midday the great lazy,
    102
  • Ahvenanmaa
    ,
    196
  • Air layering
    ,
    141
  • All the squares of trampoline are taken,
    246
  • All the things you are not yet
    ,
    235
  • A lorry-load of stuff
    ,
    18
  • A meditation of the glasshouses
    ,
    143
  • A mortgage on a pear tree
    ,
    131
  • An Irish miner in Staffordshire
    ,
    156
  • A pæony truss on Sussex place
    ,
    132
  • A pear tree stands in its own maze,
    131
  • Approaches to winter
    ,
    75
  • A pretty shape
    ,
    237
  • A safe light
    ,
    85
  • As good as it gets
    ,
    37
  • A skater comes to this blue pond,
    119
  • At Cabourg
    ,
    135
  • At Cabourg II
    ,
    166
  • At Great Neck one Easter,
    64
  • At the Emporium
    ,
    226
  • At three in the morning,
    96
  • Babes in the Wood
    ,
    216
  • Baby sleep
    ,
    239
  • Baron Hardup
    ,
    167
  • Basketball player on Pentecost Monday
    ,
    241
  • Bathing at Balnacarry
    ,
    213
  • Because she told a lie, he says,
    35
  • Beetroot Soup
    ,
    211
  • Big barbershop man
    ,
    175
  • Big barbershop man turning away,
    175
  • Bouncing boy
    ,
    246
  • Boys on the Top Board
    ,
    214
  • Breakfast
    ,
    94
  • Breast to breast against the azaleas,
    196
  • Breeze of ghosts
    ,
    60
  • Bristol Docks
    ,
    32
  • Brown coal
    ,
    172
  • By chance I was alone in my bed the morning,
    191
  • Cajun
    ,
    217
  • Candle poem
    ,
    225
  • Candlemas
    ,
    154
  • Christmas caves
    ,
    51
  • Christmas roses
    ,
    97
  • Clearing the mirror to see your face,
    42
  • Code-breaking in the Garden of Eden
    ,
    126
  • Coiled peel goes soft on the deserted table,
    88
  • Cold pinches the hills around Florence,
    122
  • Cool as sleep, the crates ring,
    74
  • Cursing softly and letting the matches drop,
    112
  • Cyclamen, blood-red
    ,
    21
  • Cyclamen, blood-red, fly into winter,
    21
  • Dancing man
    ,
    164
  • Decoding a night’s dreams,
    138
  • Deep in busy lizzies and black iron,
    199
  • Dense slabs of braided-up lupins,
    148
  • Depot
    ,
    17
  • Diving girl
    ,
    236
  • Do they wake careless and warm,
    158
  • Domestic poem
    ,
    71
  • Drink and the Devil
    ,
    195
  • Dropped yolks of shore-lamp quiver on tarmac,
    180
  • Dublin 1971,
    151
  • Father,
    216
  • First, the echo,
    234
  • First, the retreat of bees,
    20
  • Fishing beyond sunset
    ,
    229
  • Florence in permafrost
    ,
    122
  • For all frozen things,
    133
  • For three years I’ve been wary of deep water,
    103
  • Fortune-teller on Church Road
    ,
    40
  • Frostbite
    ,
    240
  • ‘Fuck this staring paper and table,
    81
  • Getting the Strap
    ,
    203
  • Ghost at noon
    ,
    247
  • Giraffes in Hull
    ,
    14
  • Greek beads
    ,
    248
  • Greenham Common,
    80
  • Hare in the snow
    ,
    229
  • Hare in the snow cresting,
    229
  • ‘Has she gone then?’ they asked,
    152
  • Heimat
    ,
    199
  • He is the one you can count on,
    226
  • He lived next door all his life
    ,
    227
  • Here at my worktop, foil-wrapping a silver salmon,
    228
  • Here I am in the desert knowing nothing,
    200
  • Her fast asleep face turns from me,
    86
  • Heron
    ,
    177
  • Herring girl
    ,
    58
  • He’s going on holiday to lonely,
    192
  • Holiday to Lonely
    ,
    192
  • How hushed the sentence is this morning,
    43
  • Hungry Thames
    ,
    244
  • Hungry Thames, I walk over the bridge,
    244
  • I can’t say why so many coffin-makers,
    46
  • Ice coming
    ,
    20
  • I’d climbed the crab-apple in the wind,
    179
  • If I wanted totems, in place of the poles,
    218
  • If no revolution come
    ,
    83
  • If only
    ,
    38
  • If only I’d stayed up till four in the morning,
    38
  • If you had said the words ‘to the forest’,
    186
  • I hung up the sheets in moonlight,
    85
  • I imagine you sent back from Africa
    ,
    98
  • I know that no one dare judge another’s need,
    230
  • I lay and heard voices,
    50
  • In a back garden I’m painting,
    69
  • In a wood near Turku
    ,
    92
  • In Berber’s Ice Cream Parlour
    ,
    184
  • In deep water
    ,
    103
  • I never stop listening to you sing,
    237
  • In memoriam Cyril Smith 1913–1945
    ,
    99
  • In Rodmell Garden
    ,
    68
  • In the chemist’s at night-time,
    77
  • In the corded hollows of the wood,
    182
  • In the Desert Knowing Nothing
    ,
    200
  • In the goods yard the tracks are unmarked,
    62
  • In the tea house
    ,
    120
  • In the tea house the usual,
    120
  • In the tents
    ,
    116
  • In the weightlessness of time and our passage within it,
    105
  • In the white sheets I gave you,
    205
  • Inside out
    ,
    47
  • I remember years ago, that we had Christmas roses,
    91
  • I see the boys at the breakwater,
    167
  • I should like to be buried in a summer forest
    ,
    233
  • I should like to be buried in a summer forest,
    233
  • ‘It is finished,’ said Christ. Blood ebbed from his face,
    22
  • Its big red body ungulps,
    211
  • It’s evening on the river,
    177
  • It’s not the four-wheeled drive crawler,
    136
  • It’s past nine and breakfast is over,
    68
  • It starts with breaking into the wood,
    55
  • It was not always a dry well,
    176
  • It was the green lorry with its greasy curtain,
    18
  • It was too hot, that was the argument,
    142
  • It was you I heard, your tiger pad on the stairs,
    45
  • I’ve approached him since childhood,
    99
  • Jacob’s drum
    ,
    15
  • Lady Macduff and the primroses
    ,
    104
  • Lambkin
    ,
    149
  • Landscape from the Monet Exhibition at Cardiff
    ,
    93
  • Later my stepson will uncover a five-inch live shell,
    135
  • Lead me with your cold, sure hand,
    190
  • Lemon sole
    ,
    50
  • Let us think that we are pilgrims,
    155
  • Little Ellie and the timeshare salesman
    ,
    245
  • Long long have I looked for you,
    54
  • Lutherans
    ,
    187
  • Malta
    ,
    153
  • Mary Shelley
    ,
    105
  • Missile launcher passing at night
    ,
    124
  • Mr Lear has left a ring in his room,
    39
  • Mr Lear’s ring
    ,
    39
  • Music plays gently. Yesterday’s morning paper,
    249
  • My nephews with almond faces,
    79
  • My sad descendants
    ,
    111
  • My train halts in the snowfilled station,
    93
  • Near Dawlish
    ,
    86
  • Nearly May Day
    ,
    168
  • Need
    ,
    230
  • New crops
    ,
    139
  • Next door
    ,
    226
  • Next door/is the same as ours, but different,
    226
  • Not going to the forest
    ,
    186
  • Now I write off a winter of growth,
    75
  • Now the snowdrop, the wood-anemone, the crocus,
    104
  • Now winter comes and I am half-asleep,
    244
  • O engines,
    139
  • Of course they’re dead, or this is a film,
    194
  • Off the West Pier
    ,
    180
  • Often when the bread tin is empty,
    94
  • Old Jeffery begins his night music,
    144
  • Old warriors and women,
    31
  • Ollie and Charles at St Andrew’s Park
    ,
    90
  • On circuit from Heptonstall Chapel
    ,
    146
  • One more for the beautiful table
    ,
    148
  • One year he painted his front door yellow,
    227
  • One yellow chicken
    ,
    178
  • On his skin the stink,
    195
  • On not writing certain poems
    ,
    162
  • On smooth buttercup fields,
    156
  • On the white path at noon when the sun,
    247
  • O that old cinema of memory,
    16
  • Our day off, agreed by the wind,
    116
  • Out of the Blue
    ,
    12
  • O wintry ones, my sad descendants,
    111

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