Out of The Blue (11 page)

“Jamie, I’m so sorry I got cold feet.”

She turned in my arms to face me. The look on her face made me worry all over again. She looked almost indifferent. 

“You’ve changed your mind,” I said, pulling away. 

“No, I haven’t.” She pulled me back to her.” I was just thinking about some of the stuff you said earlier. I don’t want to push you into anything, if you’re not ready for th–” 

I cut her off. “I’m ready, I want this … I want to be with you.” My voice was a little more forceful than I expected.

She looked away, taking a deep breath before locking her eyes back on mine.

“Robin, I really like you and it’s not just a sex thing, which is really great by the way.”

I grinned in agreement, before she continued. 

“I enjoy spending time with you. I want to go places and do things with you … as a couple, as a wife even, maybe … in the distant future.”  

I tried to stop my eyes widening to the size of saucers at her words. She did say distant, right?

“Like what?” I asked with a curious eyebrow, hoping I could do something to make it up to her.

“I don’t know. Hiking in the Rockies so you can tell me all about the plants and animals that live there, too.”

“Sounds perfect. When are we going?” I asked, already picturing the beautiful scenery in my head.

“Whenever you want.”

I moved closer, struggling to drag my eyes from her lips. “I could speak to James about getting some time off.” My mind continued to think out loud about her request. “I haven’t been on holiday with a girl–” I stopped myself from finishing the ominous word, considering my recent behaviour.

“What? You haven’t been on holiday with a girlfriend before?” 

I shook my head, realising it made me yet more of a commitment-phobe or maybe a workaholic, neither of which was necessarily a good thing when trying to embark on a relationship with someone.

She reached up, tucking stray hairs that had escaped my ponytail behind my ear before her fingers gently caressed the side of my neck. “What am I going to do with you?”   

I moved forwards again, gently pressing her lips to mine. It had been almost a week since I’d had dedicated time with her soft succulent lips; they were every bit as good as I remembered. I edged closer, pressing our bodies together as her hand moved around the back of my neck, pulling me in deeper. Her tongue pushed past my lips where I welcomed it inside. Familiar stirrings began to flow through my body as her tongue smoothed away the bumps of the day. I pulled away from her lips, burying my face against her shoulder while we both caught our breath. We fitted together perfectly. Why on earth would I want to run from this? Focusing my attention on her neck, I deposited several kisses along the length of it. Her warm skin was soft and salty, making me want more as I edged towards the V of her shirt.

“You could take a shower with me?” I asked, continuing our conversation.

“Sounds good.”

***

Lying in bed, I remembered the excessive build-up of washing in the boot of my car and the request I had to put to Jamie. Turning my head to kiss her forehead as she rested on my shoulder, I put my plan into action. “I was wondering if you’re free next weekend. I have to go back to Manchester again and I thought you might like to come with me.”

She was still silent as she turned to look at me.

I continued to ramble to fill the void. “I could show you the sights. We could–”

Thankfully, she cut me off at this point as I wasn’t sure where I was heading.

“Can we be back for Sunday night? I have a meeting first thing on Monday.”

“Sure, no problem. Is that a yes?” I asked.

“Do you have a TV and DVD player?”

“Of course. I don’t live in a cave you know.”   

“Then it’s a yes.”

“Great, I’ll pick you up after work on Friday,” I said, trying to hide my anxiety at the thought of taking Jamie back to my inner sanctum.

It was almost 7.00 p.m. when we pulled up in in my usual basement parking spot near the lift in my apartment building. They all seemed to be called that now; gone are the blocks of flats. Although, to be fair, it did have that European or American twist on it with secured basement parking and fitted-out gymnasium. I had been drawn to it during its construction almost eight years ago; with its excessive use of glass, the apartments looked light and airy. This was confirmed when I took the virtual tour on the construction company’s website. I spent the next few years fixing up my previous house and saving as much as I could, biding my time until a suitable one came onto the market. It took almost five years but it was worth it. As soon as the fifth-floor, two bedroom apartment became available, I snapped it up.        

I turned to Jamie as I undid my seatbelt. “Can you give me a hand to get my stuff upstairs?”

“No problem.”   

I popped the boot, exposing the numerous tied-up black bags of various sizes.

“What’s all this?”

“Washing mostly,” I said, a little embarrassed.

“Don’t you own a suitcase?”

“No.”

“What? Exactly when
was
the last time you went on holiday?”

“Umm …”

“I mean abroad, where you have to take an actual bag that doesn’t come on a roll from Sainsbury’s.”

“Not for a while … a few years maybe.”

“Jesus! You really are a workaholic.”

“Please, call me Robin. I don’t want everyone to know I’m their hardworking saviour.”

I watched her eyes roll back in her head before a lopsided grin appeared. “You know you could have done some washing at my place to keep on top of it.”

“I didn’t want to impose.” I bent to retrieve some of the bags crammed in the boot. A familiar voice made me cringe.

“Hey, Robin, long time no see … Oh, hello.”

I looked up to see Carrie Woodford heading towards us, her predatory stare firmly locked on Jamie, holding a look that could only be described as distasteful, like she had eaten something very disagreeable. I managed to offer a bag to Jamie to give her something to occupy her hands in case she felt the need to use them on Carrie.

“Hi, Carrie. This is Jamie. Jamie … Carrie. Carrie lives in the same building,” I said to provide some kind of explanation of her existence and familiarity. I watched Carrie offer her hand in greeting but she soon realised it wouldn’t be reciprocated as Jamie continued to tightly clutch the black bag I had offered her.   

“Well, I can see you’re … busy. Are you around tonight? I’m going to Jack’s if you’re out and about.”

“Thanks, but we’ve got plans. Maybe another time.”

“Sure. Have a good one.” 

We both stood there watching Carrie disappear into the lift before either of us moved.

I turned to Jamie, still a little surprised by her reaction. Was she jealous of my friendship with Carrie? I couldn’t tell.

“Hey, relax. She’s not my type. We’re way too similar.”

The frown that had developed never left her face. Her hand went straight to my arm. “You’re nothing like her.” Her words held a sharpness I hadn’t heard in her voice before. I was grateful to her but I knew different. Carrie and I were quite alike. We had met up a few times in the last year, usually out in a bar or club in the city where we would scan for women seeking a good time.   

Reaching my apartment, I dragged the black bags the short distance to the utility room off the hall, leaving them in the doorway. I led the way as we entered the large, open-plan main room and did a quick scan to make sure it was suitable for guests. The white, modern kitchen was to our left, wrapping around the external corner wall. An island separated the kitchen area from the diner/sitting room. The remainder of the external walls were made up of floor-to-ceiling glass doors and windows spanning the ten metres or so to the end of the room. The room was bright and airy in the August sunshine, with the added bonus of a balcony to further enjoy the view across the city. The interior was relatively modern in design and certainly starker compared to Jamie’s home, with only a few family photos and trinkets around. The engineered hardwood flooring and white walls made it feel spacious but a little severe at times. A large, slate-grey corner suite at the end of the room faced an oak shelving unit set along the interior wall. A thick woolly rug covered this section of flooring, giving it a more luxurious feel for your feet. My desk was at the very end of the room facing the window. I could see from here it was covered in parts of models for scaled plans.                

“Well, here we are. Make yourself at home. Would you like a drink?”

“Yeah. What’s on offer?” she asked as she dropped her weekend bag on the sofa.

“Umm, good question.” I opened the fridge to find several bottles of water, cans of diet coke and two bottles of white wine. I remembered I had disposed of the milk before leaving after finding cottage cheese on my return last time I was away. I turned back to Jamie, who was already admiring the five-storey view across the city. “You have a choice of water, diet coke or wine.”

“What are you having?” she replied without turning around.

“Coke.”

“Me too. Do you wear glasses?”

I looked across the room to see her stood by my desk. “Uh, yeah, when I’m working on the computer or making models and stuff.”

Taking two cokes from the fridge, I walked over, handing one to Jamie. We stood there in silence as I reacquainted myself with the view. It was one of those weird things; I was so used to seeing it everyday day that it almost became old hat. But every time I came back from being away it totally fascinated me all over again.               

“How long have you known Carrie?” she asked, bringing me out of my daydream as she popped opened her can.

I looked at her with raised eyebrows as I thought about her question. She continued to stare out the window. I couldn’t tell if she was annoyed at me or that reality had struck and she had finally realised just what I was like. It was such a fleeting meeting; how did she get so much from it?

“She moved in about a year ago. We’ve gone out drinking a few times but we’re not that friendly really.”

“Are you her wing man or whatever they call it?”

“Wing man?” I questioned. Carrie definitely did not need a wing man. I had seen her work her magic first-hand, smooth-talking women into all sorts of compromising positions. I tried to close down the subject as discreetly as possible. “No, I’m not her wing man. I’ve only met her a couple of times when I’ve been out, that’s all. I don’t really know her very well,” I lied. I really didn’t want to have to explain how different she was or, more importantly, how similar I was to Carrie Woodford.      

“I’m just gonna put some washing on. You can take a look at my dismal film collection if you like,” I said, trying to clear her mind of Carrie.

“Don’t worry. Did you think I’d agree to coming without bringing some form of back up?”

I smiled at her profile as I made room to put my can on the desk. Thankfully, she seemed to have lost the frown that had developed in the carpark downstairs. I walked to the utility room to load the washing machine. I was annoyed that Jamie and Carrie had met. I knew I couldn’t hide who I was or had been from her, but being smacked in the face with it was another thing altogether.  

“Fuck!”

I rushed down the hall in the direction of Jamie’s outcry. “What’s wrong?” I asked, expecting to see a body bludgeoned to death on the floor of my bedroom.

“I’ve never seen a bed this enormous before. I could get lost in there, it’s so big.”

“What can I say? I like a lot of room.”

“Really?” she replied with eyebrows raised.

I moved closer, pulling her into my arms as I slowly edged her towards the bed. She pulled away, looking back nervously at the bed. I figured she was worried about how many I had brought here before her. I let her go, but stayed in the same space. I didn’t want to lose the connection.

“Jamie, I can honestly say that since moving in and buying this gigantic bed over three years ago I am the only person who has slept in it … apart from James after a party once, but that doesn’t count, does it?” I asked innocently.          

“Why’s that?”

“That he doesn’t count?” I questioned with a frown.

“No. That there hasn’t been anyone else in it?”

“I guess I don’t like bringing people back here. It’s my own personal space.”

“Why me? Why now?”

We had already had this conversation but I could fully understand her need for me to reiterate my feelings for her. I had previous after all.

“Because I want you here and I really like you. This isn’t easy for me, opening up, but I don’t want to keep you at arm’s length.”

Jamie moved back, sitting on the bed. “I’m sorry. Meeting Carrie’s really put me off my stride.”

I wanted to ask her why, but she had started unbuttoning my jeans, completely changing the subject.  

“Commando!” she exclaimed loudly.

I smiled at her reaction. “I ran out of clean underwear three days ago.”

“And you’re just telling me now.”

“I quite like it actually. Very refreshing, especially when it’s warm out. You can feel the breeze right through to your …”  

***

I stretched out in bed, expecting to bump into Jamie at some point. Eventually, I opened my eyes, scanning the bed, seeing nothing but empty space. Crawling to the edge of the bed, I went in search of her, tying my hair up in a ponytail as I walked into the main room. I found Jamie looking at a small collection of family photographs tucked away on the bookshelf spanning the main wall.

“Hey,” I said as I made my way over to her. She was dressed in her usual shorts and t-shirt. 

“Morning. Are you a naturist or is it naturalist? I’m never quite sure.”

Her voice was soft and playful again. “Well,” I began as I cuddled my naked body against her back. “I’m already a naturalist, but maybe I could become a naturist. Going commando for a few days is probably my first stepping stone into it.” I kissed the back of her neck. “Anyway, what are you doing up?”

“Hungry.”

“Find anything?” I asked hopefully, realising we hadn’t eaten last night. 

“Just a cereal bar.”

“Any more?”

“Sorry, it was the last one I think.”

I breathed in the scent of fresh washing mixed with sexed-up skin before kissing the back of her neck several more times, moving away towards the kitchen.

“Never mind. When you’ve got cereal you’ll never go hungry.” I pulled open a large double cupboard in the kitchen.

“Shit!” a voice echoed behind me.

“Is that a whole cupboard dedicated to cereal?” she asked. 

“Yep. Breakfast can be any time of the day or night. No milk, though, I’m afraid. Have to eat it dry.” I selected a box of choc chip mini Weetabix for myself before waving a hand in front of the cupboard to entice Jamie to make a choice. “Well? Minibix or perhaps madam would like another variety.”

“I believe I’ll have Cheerios this morning, please.”

“Very good choice, madam.” I handed Jamie the cereal box as I leant on the island counter between us. Delving into the Weetabix box, I grabbed a handful of cereal, eating them one by one.   

“So you’re a cereal eater one might say,” she said as she pulled a handful of cereal from her box.

“Aww, that’s pretty bad, even for this time of day.”

“Do you really think you could become a naturist?”

“Oh God, no, not at all. What about you?” I enquired, just for future reference.

“No way, but, er, you look pretty comfortable naked right now.”

“True, but that’s not unusual in my own home. I feel very safe here. Maybe I should try popping out for some milk, see how I feel,” I said, flashing my eyebrows up and down.

We ate in silence for a few moments until Jamie spoke again.    

“Are your parents still together?”

“Yeah. Why?” I asked, a little confused.

“Sorry. I was looking at the photos and they’re never in the same ones.”  

“Umm, well, that’s because they didn’t and still don’t spend a lot of time together. My dad worked away a lot, so they kind of developed separate lives in a way. I suspect that neither of them has been totally faithful since they were married. Sometimes I wonder why they’re still together now I’m not in the picture.”

I wasn’t quite sure if I should be telling Jamie all this but I had made a pact with myself to be more open with her and I had to follow it through.  

“Is that why you’re such a lothario?”

I glanced up. Her eyes were boring into me, matching her accusing tone. Her words had stopped me in my tracks.

“Er, I think I might need clothes for this conversation.” I quietly left the room, retreating to my bedroom. I was beginning to feel it was a mistake bringing Jamie here. As much as I wanted to be more open with her, I didn’t expect to be put under the microscope quite so much. Pulling some red, checked bed shorts from a drawer, I quickly put them on before selecting a plain, grey t-shirt. I needed to get out, to get some air, just to let my head breathe a little.