Outmatched in October (Spring River Valley Book 10) (9 page)

Owen knew there was no right answer to her question. He was doomed at this point no matter what he said. He only wished he could have confessed that there had been a blissful moment the other night when he’d been just that
naive. Lying next to her in the dark he’d let himself picture the future he even then knew wasn’t good enough for her. He saw a modest wedding with their friends in attendance, a small apartment, and a restored Chevy Impala with
Just Married
soaped onto the wide back window. He’d seen walks in the park after work at the store, picking her up from the rec center after her yoga class, and counting their change in a jar to take a much-deserved honeymoon a year after the fact.

He’d shut down the fantasy before the shadow of reality could ruin it any further
—the realization that since Love Notes wasn’t a chain store, the profits would continue to diminish. The owner would sell, and he’d be looking for work. Her salary as a yoga instructor would barely cover the rent, and there’d be no way they could afford to buy a house or raise a child. He hadn’t let himself follow the story to the logical conclusion where the day came that she admitted resenting having to give up all those bigger and better things in order to become his wife. 

“Owen?
Is that
what you think?”

He twisted the key in the ignition before remembering he’d never shut the car off. The drive wheel screeched in annoyance
, and he cursed. If he said no, the argument would continue. She’d waste precious time trying to convince him they could make it all work. If he said yes, she’d hate him, but at least she’d know there was nothing standing in the way of her success.

“Yes. That’s what I think.”

“Well, you’re an idiot.” She opened the car door and got out. He expected her to slam it, to rattle the windows and rock the shock absorbers with the force of her rage, but instead she just walked away, leaving the car open so he had to stretch across the seat she’d just vacated to pull it closed. The scent of her perfume hit him, a subtle, sweet reminder of the bliss they’d shared in each other’s arms.

Idiot was such a mild word. Nothing compared to the
names he called himself as he revved the engine and pulled away from the curb.

Splotches of color from street lights and neon signs glimmered in the puddles left by a cold rain, making the city street outside Claudia’s dressing room window resemble the night sky. Everything twinkled and shimmered. Yellow cabs sped by, sending showers of water over the gutters and sidewalks. Traffic surged and stuttered, and bicyclists shrouded in plastic slickers wove in and out between cars and trucks, urban daredevils who seemed not to have a care in the world.

Claudia shivered and turned away from the window, unimpressed by the dynamic cityscape that had inspired so many songs and books and works of art. There was some small part of her that found the view from the floor above Eclipse fascinating, but she tamped down that spark of excitement because it seemed to
o traitorous. She was miserable, and she wasn’t going to allow herself to forget that just yet.

A knock on the door focused her attention and she rose from the overstuffed floral couch by the window. “Come in.”

The door opened and Jacob peered around it as if he might be afraid to catch her in dishabille.

“It’s okay. I’m decent,” she said, mustering a smile. He looked great in his gray suit, confident and cool. He leaned casually on the door frame and smiled, dark eyes appraising her in a way that should have been flattering.

“The dress is perfect. Understated but very sexy. Is it new?”

She probably should have blushed at his compliment, but she just wasn’t feeling it. She’d been numb since her last conversation with Owen. “It’s newish. I’ve only worn it once before.”

The dress was sapphire blue, bought because Lily had said it made her eyes look like Elizabeth Taylor’s. More importantly, it fit well and showed some leg without making her self-conscious. Best of all, it had been on sale.

If she took the job permanently, she wouldn’t need to worry about bargain hunting for clothes
, but she probably wouldn’t be doing much shopping with Lily anymore.

Jacob spread his arms in an encompassing gesture that might have turned into a hug if she’d crossed the room to meet him halfway. “It’s my favorite color, and it suits you. Does Liam have your music?”

She nodded. “I e-mailed him earlier in the week, and he told me all the songs I picked are ones he already has.”

“Good. You don’t look the least bit nervous.”

“Should I be?” She wasn’t nervous. Just numb. She’d spent the last four days trying to decide what life in Spring River Valley would be like if she wasn’t with Owen.

She knew exactly why he’d said what he’d said to her. It hadn’t been to hurt her. She understood that he didn’t want to be the source of her regrets later in life. He believed she’d end up resenting him if she didn’t spread her wings now while she had this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
If he hadn’t forced the issue by making her angry enough to walk away from him, she probably would have found a million excuses not to be here tonight.

He was right. She owed herself this moment, if for no other reason than she would never be able to say she
hadn’t given it a try.

“No, not at all. You’re going to be amazing tonight. I know it. You have a few minutes before the first set. Do you want to go downstairs with me, or would you rather have a couple more minutes to yourself?”

“I’ll go with you.” If he left her alone, there was the possibility she might make a wrong turn on her way down to the club and end up in a cab back to her hotel.

He swept an arm toward the door
, and she led them out into the narrow corridor beyond.

“Don’t forget, any time you have friends in the city to see you perform, just give me their names and I’ll be sure they get a great table, no cover charge.”

The offer should have made her happy, but instead it caused a pang of regret. She hadn’t invited anyone to see her perform tonight, and now it seemed so foolish to have cut everyone out of what should have been her shining moment. Lily understood this was just a one-time deal. Taylor had wanted to come, but she told him not to, saying his presence would make her nervous, which wasn’t true. He might have brought Dani along, which would have been cute and romantic—clearly those two were destined for something—but Owen’s absence would have just made everyone else’s presence more painful.

She couldn’t imagine seeing him sitting in the lush velvet
-cushioned booths that surrounded the stage. It wasn’t his style to go out for the evening in a suit and tie and order expensive cocktails and tapas. He was jeans and a T-shirt and a place where beer flowed before expensive whiskey or scotch. He wanted her to believe he could never fit in in a place like this, yet he wanted her to feel like
she
belonged here. It seemed so ironic that he would be missing now, when he was the one who had given her the courage to come this far. From that first solo performance for the middle school graduation, he’d been the one cheering her on and telling her she could be a major talent. Not having him here made it seem like none of that was true.

The short elevator ride to the floor below passed in silence. Claudia almost wanted to thank Jacob for not feeling the need to chat. She hoped he didn’t think she was rude, but she needed time to consider why a job that paid twice her rec center salary didn’t make her happy when everyone who knew her thought it should.

What was really wrong with her?

“
Knock ’em dead,” Jacob whispered when the elevator door opened. She offered him what was probably a bland smile and stepped into the corridor. Liam’s pre-show piano riffs reached them, along with the clink of glasses and the aroma of gourmet nibbles passing from the kitchen to the club. Absent was the smell of grilled steak and fries that permeated Colette’s.

“Thanks. I have a few minutes still before showtime, right?”

Jacob checked his watch. The diamonds on the face glittered. “About ten.”

“Good. I just want to make a phone call
, and I don’t get reception in here. Is that the way to the street?”

“Don’t go outside in the rain. You’ll ruin your dress. Use my office phone.” He moved past her to a door on the left
-hand side of the hallway and opened it with a key he produced from an inner pocket of his jacket.

“Thank you. It’ll only be a minute.”

“Take nine.” He winked. “I’ll be seated front and center, and I’ll have a mineral water waiting for you when your set is done.”

He left her by the open door. Glad for the privacy and somewhat relieved not to have the temptation of the street to lure her back to her hotel, she ducked into the office, which was every bit as luxurious as the rest of the club. The desk phone was sleek and black, the receiver heavy. She dialed the familiar number quickly, not sure what she would say to Owen, but she had to talk to him.

After reaching his voice mail at home, the store, and his cell phone, she hung up. What she had to say to him didn’t matter anymore. He’d given her a very clear message, even if it wasn’t what she wanted to hear.

* * * *

Panic struck Owen when the name Jacob Larsen flashed on his caller ID. His mind immediately went to a dark place where something had happened to Claudia and Mr. Armani had found his number in her phone and called with unthinkable news.

Then he wised up and realized
she
must be calling him…from Larsen’s phone. The Caller ID didn’t say Eclipse. It said Larsen, J—so it was a personal phone—maybe the one in his bedroom.

That made perfect sense. He’d practically thrown her at the club owner. Now she was calling to gloat.

But Claudia wasn’t like that.

Even when she was hurt or angry, she was never vicious or cruel. She was an angel. She was diamonds. He was dirt.

His thumb hovered over the connect button on the phone, and he thought of all the million ways he wanted to apologize to her, but he knew the only words that would come out if he heard her voice.
Come home. I need you. I miss you. I don’t want you to leave here, ever.

He couldn’t do that to her.

He hit ignore and shoved the phone into his back pocket.

“This mic is dead,” Dani Lennox said, coming up behind him from the back room of Colette’s. “Taylor just tested it. Do we have another?”

“What? Yeah. I’ve got a spare in the car. I’ll get it.”

The pretty redhead smiled and gave him a
thumbs-up. “You’re aces, DeWitt.”

He didn’t answer, just sidled past her and headed out the back to his car.
He had a few pieces of extra equipment in the trunk, a microphone among them. Rather than open the trunk, though, he went for the driver’s-side door.

He was in the car with the engine revving before he’d completely formulated a plan. His perfunctory text to Taylor before he pulled out of the parking lot read:
Give Dani my mic. Stick to the ballads. I’ll see you when I get back.

Dani and Taylor would be pissed
, but he didn’t care. He had to make things right now before he pushed Claudia so far away that he’d never be able to get her back.

“Hey, Liam, where’s Jacob?” Claudia had let herself into the club with the pass key Jacob had given her. He told her she was welcome to come and use the space during off hours for rehearsal, and she’d been too tired to explain why she would never need it.

This morning, after less than three hours of sleep, she’d woken to a text message from him.
Can you meet me at the club at 10? Important.

The piano player looked as fresh as a daisy. No one would have believed he’d left the club when she had, at just after three AM.

She’d showered but still felt gritty. She hadn’t enjoyed sleeping alone in the hotel room, and the dark circles under her eyes would require a lot of makeup to erase. She wanted coffee, which she could smell—there had to be a pot brewing in the kitchen, but early morning caffeine wouldn’t help her twelve hours from now when her second show began. 

“He’s at his booth.” Liam winked. “You were phenomenal last night. I don’t think I got a chance to tell you.”

She smiled. “So were you. How come you look like you’ve been on vacation for a week, and I feel like I was run over by a truck?”

He put a hand on her arm. “Don’t worry, babe. You’ll get used to the hours. Stop back later so we can go over your opener, okay?”

“Yeah.” She pointed into the club, and Liam nodded. Apparently Jacob hadn’t called her in early to fire her, but what for? Had he noticed she’d been off last night? Even she thought it was clear that her emotional state had come through in her voice. How had Liam missed it?

Her footsteps echoed through the empty club
, and she slowed her pace, feeling like an intruder until Jacob rose from his seat and peered at her over the plush back of the center booth.