Paradise (11 page)

‘To be honest, I didn’t know it was coming out, but I’m not surprised. Simone is completely broke. I imagine the money was too big a temptation.’ He paused. ‘And I expect you wondered if there was any more to the story than Cal being nice to her?’ Jez voiced the fear that was most concerning Angel. ‘Like, has it gone beyond friendship?’

Angel dug her nails into the palms of her hands with anxiety; trying to hold it together in case Jez went on to say that Cal was having a relationship with Simone. ‘As far as I know,’ he said carefully, ‘and Cal doesn’t really open up to me – he is just seeing Simone because he feels sorry for her, nothing more. But why don’t you ask him yourself?’

‘Why should I care?’ Angel tried to say breezily, though she felt as if she was speaking through a mouthful of cotton wool. ‘I’m with Ethan.’

‘I think we both know the answer to that one,’ Jez said quietly. ‘Don’t we?’

‘Oh, God, Jez . . . I cannot believe that I’m even talking about this! It’s been nearly a year since we broke up, and he still has the power to turn my life upside down!’

‘I refer you to my previous question,’ Jez replied. ‘But, look, try and chill about the Simone thing. You’re making it into something that it’s not. I promise, it’s not important. And tell me how the filming is going? I cannot wait to see the series. I bet you’re an absolute star in it and the Americans will love you.’

Angel thought back to how pissed off Mimi was with her for not opening up about Ethan, and how pissed off
Ethan was about the marriage thing, even after their consolation shag. ‘Ummm . . . I’m not sure about that.’

But Jez was off on one about how she would soon become a household name, like Kim Kardashian, and wouldn’t listen to a word when she objected that she was being too quiet for the director’s liking. Or that she had her regrets about ever agreeing to take part in it in the first place. Jez was strictly from the school of thought that believed all publicity was good publicity.

Angel ended the call by promising to be more chilled about Simone, though she wasn’t sure how long that promise would last. Almost instantly her phone rang and her heart beat that little bit faster when she saw Cal’s name flash up. ‘Hi, I just wanted to talk to you about a story that’s out in the papers today,’ he said, getting straight to the point.

‘If it’s the one in the
News
of
the
World
, I’ve seen it,’ Angel replied, definitely not feeling chilled.

‘I’ve just been a friend to Simone, Angel, it’s nothing more than that. She was in such a mess when I saw her, I felt I had to do something. We were close once, and I know that deep down she isn’t a bad person. She just got lost.’ Cal sounded resigned.

‘It’s okay,’ Angel said defensively. ‘You don’t have to justify anything to me, you’re free to do what you want; we both are.’

He sighed. ‘I know, I just didn’t want you to think that I was having a relationship with her. I know in the past she has sold stories that have hurt you. That’s all.’

That might be all as far as he was concerned, but Angel had a whole list of questions she wanted to ask Cal. Like, how often did he see Simone? Did he really just see her as a friend? And did he think she still had feelings for him? But now he was asking after Honey.

Angel filled him in on their daughter’s latest exploits and was then suddenly aware that Ethan had walked
into the room and was looking over her shoulder at the story on the computer screen. He remained standing behind her, making Angel feel awkward.

‘Quite the saint, your ex,’ he said snidely when she’d finished her call. ‘I bet he’s fucking her, though. There’s got to be a trade off for paying for someone to go into rehab. And she looks hot and up for it! He’s only human. You surely don’t think he’s been living like a monk since you broke up, do you?’

Angel spun round on him, furious to hear Ethan give voice to the one thing she was most afraid of. ‘He’s not fucking her, actually. Is that what
you
would do then? Yeah, I just bet you would . . . with your track record with women. Fuck them and then leave them with a baby to bring up without you! But you’re not in a position to pay for anything right now, are you?’ She lashed out with all the things she knew would really hurt him. ‘Have you even bothered to make contact with your daughter?’

‘I’m working on it. Like I said – it’s complicated,’ he shouted back. ‘And why are you always defending Cal? Do you never stop to think about what it’s like for me, knowing that man is still your husband? Always wondering if the reason why you won’t divorce him is because you still love him? Why can’t you ever see anyone else’s point of view? It’s always just about
you
!’ He slammed his hand down on the dressing table. ‘Jesus, Angel, you make it so damned hard for me sometimes!’

Angel had had enough. First the news about Simone, then Ethan having a go at her. ‘Just leave me alone!’ she shouted back. ‘I only fucking agreed to do the reality show because of you, and you’re doing my head in with your jealousy!’

She stormed out of the room, almost shaking with fury, wishing that she was back home in England where
she could have gone out with Gemma and Jez and let rip about Ethan. The couple avoided each other for the rest of the evening which was easy to do in Ethan’s vast house. Angel watched
The
Proposal
on DVD, though she was in no mood for a rom com right now. Ethan was no doubt holed up in his beloved games room or working out in his state-of-the-art gym. Well, fuck him, she thought, in no mood for making up. As far as she was concerned, he was the one in the wrong.

That night Ethan slept in one of the many guest rooms, and left for training before Angel and Honey got up the following morning.

‘You know, you guys should really make up. Ethan’s not in a good place right now, Angel. Surely you can see that?’ Benny nagged her while Molly, the make-up artist, got her ready for the lingerie shoot. Angel and Ethan still hadn’t spoken since the argument two days ago, but Angel was damned if she would make the first move. Ethan had been bang out of order as far as she was concerned, saying those things about Cal, and what’s more she really didn’t need Benny giving her grief. He was at the shoot because it was being filmed for the reality show, but the last thing Angel wanted to do was to pose seductively with him ogling her.

She kept looking straight ahead of her while Molly applied bronzer to her cheeks. ‘Not that it’s any of your business, Benny, but Ethan really needs to apologise to
me
.’ Angel was trying to keep her cool but Benny was seriously winding her up.

He chewed hard on his gum, working his plump cheeks as if psyching himself up for his next attempt. ‘He worships you, Angel, you know that. And of course he feels insecure about your ex-husband . . . not that he
is
your ex-husband yet . . . what guy wouldn’t? You’ve just got to cut Ethan some slack. I think it would make
a big difference to his confidence if you speeded things up with the divorce. He feels he’s in limbo . . . like you’re keeping him hanging on, but deep down not committing to the relationship.’

What was Benny now – a fucking shrink?

‘Ethan is a great guy, Angel, don’t you realise how lucky you are to have him? He could have his pick of anyone – Oscar-winning actresses, models, that top tennis player – and he chose you, a glamour model from England. Count yourself one very lucky girl!’

Benny was not going to give up. Angel just hated him talking to her like this. It felt as if the man was trying to take over her life, and for the first time she got the distinct impression that Benny really didn’t like her. It was the way he had said ‘glamour model’, as if it was the lowest of the low professions. He paused before going in for the kill.

‘And, you know, if you guys got married it would be a ratings winner for the show. No question. A wedding would guarantee a second series, maybe even a third. It would be an amazing coup. E! would love you big time.’

Now Angel did turn and look at Benny, incensed by his remark. Did he think she would get married just to score good ratings! What kind of planet was the man living on? Well, actually, she knew exactly the planet he was living on – Planet Only Money Matters, and screw everything and everyone else.

‘If I ever got married again, believe me, it would not be in front of the cameras,’ she said in a low voice, trying to keep a lid on her emotions. She was itching to inflict physical violence on Benny, except that would involve physical contact.

He shrugged. ‘My advice? Don’t rule anything out. I’ll see you out there.’ And he sauntered out of the dressing room.

‘What a fucking fuckwit! Slimeball . . . mother-fucker!’
Angel exploded, nearly causing Molly to jab her in the eye with the mascara wand.

‘I guess you don’t like him much,’ she said perkily, blowing a perfect pink bubble with her gum. She was a sweet enough girl, who had worked as Angel’s make-up artist for a number of shoots, but Angel missed having Gemma who had always done her make-up in the UK and who got Angel completely. Molly only seemed to do perky and ‘have a nice day’ bollocks, and that all seemed so fake to Angel.

‘I guess not,’ Angel replied dryly. She flicked back her long hair, which had been straightened and now hung perfectly down her back, and considered Molly’s handiwork in the mirror. Smokey eyes, check; glossed lips, check; perfectly contoured cheekbones, check. She would do.

Angel wandered into the studio where Ashton Walker, the photographer, was getting everything ready for the shoot. The studio had been dressed to look like an intimate boudoir, and occupying central position was an elegant double bed with a delicate wrought-iron bedstead. It was covered in a rich purple silk throw, with pale pink and violet silk cushions scattered over it, making it the perfect backdrop for Angel’s shoot. Usually Ashton was the most laid-back, easygoing photographer she knew and Angel loved working with him, but today he seemed on edge. Angel soon found out why. Mimi and Benny kept getting in his face, acting as if they were running the shoot, rather than being guests there.

‘Hey, Angel,’ he said, walking over and giving her a hug in place of a kiss, not wanting to spoil her make up. ‘Shall we get started? First up, can I have you kneeling up on the bed and smiling at the camera, head to one side, hand on your hip?’

‘Wouldn’t it be better if she was lying down?’ Benny
put in. ‘Kinda sexier that way, I’d have thought. Or how about she’s kneeling on all fours?’

‘That’s not the look we’re going for here,’ Ashton replied, and took up a camera and began clicking away, clearly wanting to avoid any further conversation.

Angel slipped off her white robe to reveal the lingerie: a cream silk and lace bra with a matching thong. It took a while for her to get into her posing groove – she was just too aware of Benny ogling her, along with Todd zooming in on her with the film camera. She needed to get into her zone and tried to block out everyone and everything except for Ashton and the stills camera. Fifteen minutes later he was happy with his shots and Angel was off to the dressing room to change into the next set of lingerie. Indeed, she was just about to whip everything off when she turned round and discovered, to her annoyance, that Todd had followed her in with his camera running, closely followed by Benny. Did they seriously think she was going to strip off in front of them? Was Benny about to come out with some bollocks about it being good for ratings? Well, if they thought they were going to get a shot of her Brazilian, they had another think coming!

She put on a fake smile and held her hand up to the lens. ‘Sorry, guys,’ she said in a mock-sweet voice. ‘You don’t get to see this bit.’

Extremely reluctantly, Benny and Todd left the dressing room and Angel slammed the door shut behind them, turning the key for good measure – she wouldn’t put it past Benny to try his luck again.

Some three hours and ten changes of lingerie later, Angel was finished with the shoot. She had arranged to meet Alisha, one of her newfound LA friends, for cocktails at Chateau Marmont. Alisha was a stunning
African American woman, with looks to rival Halle Berry and a knockout figure even after having three sons. She also had the dirtiest laugh Angel had ever heard. She was married to Logan, one of Ethan’s team mates in the Dodgers and his closest friend.

Alisha was already sitting at a table when Angel arrived, looking as effortlessly beautiful as ever in a gorgeous bronze silk wrap dress, sipping a glass of champagne. ‘Angel, so good to see you!’ she declared, standing up and kissing her lightly on the cheek while enveloping her in a cloud of exotic floral perfume that, knowing Alisha, was bespoke.

Her high standards of grooming put Angel to shame. Alisha was forever having her nails manicured, feet pedicured, regular facials and waxing. It seemed like a full-time job to Angel. She had to be groomed for her glamour work but it wasn’t something she loved doing, more something she knew she had to do.

‘So how are things with you guys?’ Alisha asked once Angel had ordered a Cosmopolitan.

She shrugged. ‘Okay.’ She was tempted not to go into more detail, knowing it would put her on a downer, but then she found herself opening up about what had been going on. Alisha had known Ethan a long time; she would probably have some insights into his character.

Alisha smiled. ‘I guessed something was up. Logan said Ethan has been real moody at training these past days, but when I asked him if he knew what was wrong, he had no idea! Men are so bad at dealing with emotional stuff. I can only hope that I’m raising my boys with more emotional intelligence than Logan has.’

‘I just think Ethan needs not to get so wound up about Cal. I mean, he has to face it. Cal is always going to be in my life because of Honey. There is nothing I can do about that.’ Angel spoke in a rush then realised
she was sounding pretty wound up herself. She took a sip of her cocktail and tried to calm down.

Alisha smiled at her. ‘I’m not going to take sides in this, but it is tough for Ethan. He’s really in love with you . . . I’ve never known him be like this with any other woman. You’re the one, as far as he’s concerned. So of course he’s going to find it difficult to accept that you haven’t divorced Cal yet. Hell, a lot of women would have done it straight away, after what Cal did to you. Ethan just feels insecure, especially when it came out about him having a daughter. I know he was terrified he would lose you over that.’