Passion Follows Pain (Passion Series Book 3) (28 page)

It hurt, I hurt and as I scrubbed and scrubbed so violently that I began to bleed from the various wounds over me, I finally gave in to the overwhelming relief at being away from him and all that he’d done to me, and sank to the floor, the tears streaming unchecked down my face.

I cried and cried, huddled in the shower as the water streamed down over me. It was a cathartic moment for me; the water both a cleansing of my mind and body. I was so caught up in my emotional release that I never heard the shower door open but suddenly strong arms closed around me and I tensed briefly, a moment of fear flashing through me, until the scent filled my nostrils. It was that beautiful scent that had already become so familiar to me, it was Lucian.

I turned to him and he pulled me into his arms where I continued to sob, my face pressed against his t-shirt. His hand rubbed soothingly over my back and he murmured something softly to me, but I couldn’t make out what it was over the noise of the water, from those four shower heads.

I curled my arms around his neck, clinging to him, not wanting to let him go as I raised my face to his, frowning when I saw his hair soaked and plastered to his scalp. Then it finally registered that he was fully dressed. He’d cared enough to come into the shower to comfort me with no regard for the fact that he was still wearing his jeans and t-shirt.

Our eyes met, the water dripping off his absurdly long lashes and he smiled, a slow, sweet, sexy smile which I shakily returned. I pushed my fingers into his dripping wet hair and pulled his face towards mine. He came willingly until our lips were a mere hairs breadth from one another and then he stopped. His eyes searched mine as if looking for something and I dropped my gaze to his lips, mine parting slightly. I heard him groan softly and he closed that tiny gap between us, his mouth covering mine and finally, finally he started to kiss me.

This time Lucian didn’t hold back. It was if he sensed that I didn’t want him to treat me like I was some delicate and fragile piece of glass. Despite being taken by my father, despite being beaten and raped which should have been enough to have me retreating within myself, Lucian seemed to know that something was different, I was different. I wanted to be strong, free, to live and when his tongue pushed past my lips to seek mine, licking at me, I didn’t hold back. I met the sweep of his tongue with mine, my arms tightening around his neck, my body curving into his, desperate for closer contact with his hard, muscular chest.

As the kiss became more passionate, more forceful, I climbed onto his lap. The wet denim of his jean clad thigh brushed against my aching pussy and I sat down on him, rubbing that little sensitive part of me against him, wanting something to relieve the feelings building inside me.

Lucian’s lips left mine and I gasped for air then moaned as he kissed his way down my neck, feeling the graze of his fangs brushing my sensitive skin. I braced myself, my fingers digging into the back of his head pressing him more firmly into my neck until with a guttural growl he bit down on me and began to suck my blood into his mouth.

He bit down harder and I cried out with the mix of both pleasure and pain, my hips shifting restlessly as I rubbed against his thigh until finally I tensed, then cried out, my body shuddering, my internal muscles clenching as an intense orgasm ripped its way through me.

I gasped and moaned through every wave of pleasure until I was done and collapsed, spent and exhausted against Lucian while the warm water continued to shower down on top of us.

Chapter Eighteen

Arissa

“Are you ok baby?” Lucian’s voice reached me through the post orgasmic haze that surrounded me and I blinked, staring up into his face. I could see tension around his eyes and the heat of his desire seemed to glow in their chocolate brown depths.

I watched the water streaming off him, dripping from his lashes, running down his face and pouring off his chin and I frowned. “Why are you dressed?” I asked, my eyes moving over his chest. His t-shirt had moulded itself to his body and every muscle was outlined clearly by the wet fabric. He looked so beautiful, so incredibly gorgeous and I reached out, my fingers tracing over his biceps, watching as they flexed under my touch.

“You were crying baby. I needed to get to you to comfort you. I wasn’t going to take the time to take my clothes off first. It’s only water, my clothes will dry and I was worried you might question my motives if I was naked anyway.” He met my eyes. “Would you seriously have thought I was simply here to comfort you if I’d been naked?”

I couldn’t help smiling at his question. “I guess you are right. I would have wondered what your intentions were had you been naked, but then…” I stopped, my eyes moving over him again.

He looked so good and I lowered my gaze to his thighs where the muscles bulged under the wet denim of his jeans. My eyes then shifted to his groin and I blushed when I saw the solid ridge of his erection.

Suddenly I wanted to see him naked. I wanted to touch him, to caress him and I wanted his hands on me. I wanted his body against mine but it was more than that, I wanted him; I wanted him to make love to me. I wanted his body to cleanse me of the memory of my father lying on me and frantically I lunged at Lucian, grabbing his t-shirt, trying to rip it over his head. The trouble was, the fabric was soaked, it had adhered to his body and it frustrated me when it wouldn’t allow me to simply peel it off him.

His hands covered mine, halting my fumbling attempts to pull his t-shirt off. “Whoa baby. What are you doing?”

I blushed at his words. I must be going about this all wrong if he couldn’t tell what I was doing, or at least trying to do. Maybe he didn’t want me? Just because he had an erection didn’t mean he really wanted me and I suddenly felt silly for attempting to seduce him and hastily tried to pull my hands out from under his.

“I…I…it’s ok, I’m sorry. It was silly of me….” I stammered unable to meet his eyes.

His fingers tipped my chin up until my reluctant gaze met his. “What is silly of you, and what do you want baby? I need for you to be perfectly clear so I don’t risk frightening you. Tell me what you want?”

“I want you.” I whispered.

“What do you want from me though? I need you to spell it out so there’s no confusion here.”

I stared up into his gorgeous face as he looked down at me, the water still streaming over us. “I want you to make love to me.” I said and dropped my head, suddenly shy.

Lucian didn’t say anything, he didn’t move, he didn’t seem to react at all and finally a little curious and a little concerned, I raised my head to his again and saw him with his head back, face into the spray from the four shower heads, his eyes closed, his expression tortured.

I reached out to touch him and his eyes lowered to mine again. “Are you sure this is what you want? It’s so soon after him and I need you to be sure because I couldn’t bear it if you changed your mind part way through, or worse you hated what happened afterwards.“ He searched my expression for a moment. “Do you have any idea how much I want you? I have wanted you from the moment I first met you, and I have tried so hard to be patient with you, to not frighten or hurt you and trust me, that’s not the natural way of a vampire. We see, we want, we take, but I can’t do that to you because I care about you. I want you to want me because you like me not because I’ve used mind control over you. So, I ask you again. Are you sure this is what you want?”

Tears welled up in my eyes again at his words, washed away by the warm spray from the shower and I nodded. “I want you Lucian, I want you so much. I need you to show me what it is like to have sex with someone I want to have sex with. You gave me a taste of what it could be like last night and it was wonderful, mind blowing, more than I could have imagined but now, now I want you to go all the way.” I whispered and raised my lips to his.

Lucian

As Lucian gazed down into the sweet, beautiful face of this amazing, incredible woman he gently touched her slightly swollen and bruised cheek, the remaining proof of her father’s assault on her. Despite what that bastard had done, she was so beautiful and her strength never ceased to amaze him. She’d been kidnapped, beaten, raped, beaten again and god only knew what else she’d had to endure with that pathetic piece of shit that called himself her father, but she’d survived. Not only had she survived, but she seemed to have come out of it even stronger, more self-assured, more determined not to allow him to control even one more single day of her life. The thing that blew Lucian away the most was the fact that this gorgeous woman with the angelic face and beautiful heart had chosen him. Despite her father’s abuse, despite it all, she’d chosen him, a vampire, to be the one to make love to her. It would be like taking her virginity, since she’d never had sex any other way, other than the violent raping that her father had subjected her to for years. Even long before a girl should have ever had her body invaded by a man’s, he’d raped her.

“You’re sure? You really want this?” He asked, needing her to be sure, needing her to have no doubts. She parted her lips, clearly inviting him to kiss her, but it wasn’t until she nodded that he groaned and gave in, giving her what she wanted, what he wanted too.

He lowered his lips to hers plunging his tongue straight into the moist warmth of her mouth, licking his way around her sweetness. He felt her tongue touch his and she started to kiss him back with a level of enthusiasm that threatened to unman him. Her hands were in his hair, tugging at him and he groaned as the pain she inflicted on him, both exciting him and making him want more.

He slid one hand around to the front of her, cupping her breast, teasing the nipple, grabbing it between his thumb and fingers, plucking at it until he felt it peak and harden under his touch.

Again Arissa’s hands tugged at his t-shirt but it was so wet, completely adhered to him now, so he broke the kiss, despite her small sound of protest and ripped the damned offending piece of fabric over his head, tossing it aside.

He watched her eyes move to his chest, her gaze shifting over him until she finally reached out, her hands gliding across his skin, raking through the fine covering of hair. She circled the flat discs of his nipples until they hardened and that seemed to fascinate her, so much so, she leaned forward and Lucian swallowed hard when her tongue flicked over the little peaks.

Fuck this was going to test his control in ways it had never been tested before. He was used to experienced women who wouldn’t care when he bent them over the table or bed, and just fucked them until they’d both come, but he couldn’t do that to Arissa. As tempting as it was to do so, he knew he’d scare the hell out of her if he did that. Still, he had to get up and get his wet jeans off. He was so hard it was painful and the wet denim felt like sandpaper over his cock. He knew he could have simply opened the zip and released himself that way, but he wanted his first time with her to be skin on skin, nothing getting in the way, no barriers between their bodies at all.

“Baby, I have to get up. My jeans are like damned sandpaper on me and they’re going to grind away my manhood at this rate.” He gave a crooked smile and watched her eyes widen before she gave one of those cute little giggles of hers again. “That’s right, laugh at the man in pain.” He gave a mock frown.

Arissa’s eyes shot open wide and fear flashed in her eyes. “I…I’m sorry…I…I didn’t mean to laugh…for...forgive me.”

Lucian groaned when he saw her expression. God, she thought he was angry with her? That fucking asshole father of hers had a lot to answer for. He pulled her into his arms, one hand smoothing down her back. “God, no baby, I was joking. It’s me who is sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I love to hear you laugh and you teased me so I teased you back.” He grabbed her face, cupping her cheeks in his hands, his face close to hers. “I’m not your father. I will never be your father; I will never treat you like your father. You can say whatever you like to me and don’t stop teasing me, I love it, but I really do need to get these jeans off. I’m beginning to think denim’s not really meant to be worn for long once its wet.”

He straightened and as he rose to his feet, he pulled her up with him, releasing her long enough to pop his jeans open and ease them over his painfully erect cock. Getting the clingy wet denim down his legs proved challenging and he struggled, desperate to get them off, forced to hop around, until finally he’d pulled the damned things off, and was naked.

“Come baby, as tempting as it is to take you in the shower. I think we’re nearly prunes and although Fabian does everything bigger and better so it’s an excellent hot water heater, I think we’ve more than tested its capacity. I know I don’t want to suddenly be doused with cold water should it run out halfway through me making love to you.”

She gave that sweet giggle of hers again and nodded. “I think you might be right, and Fabian will probably not be happy about how long the shower has been running for.”

Lucian chuckled. “Don’t worry about my sire. What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”

He pulled her out of the shower and carefully wrapped a towel around her hair and with another one, he dried her body. He kept his touch gentle so he wouldn’t hurt her, and once she was dry, he hastily dried himself. His need was growing, his desire for her so powerful now, he feared he might explode if he didn’t get inside her soon.

He had to keep his desire under control though until he’d dried her hair and he did that, massaging her scalp until he’d soaked up as much of the water as he could. Once he was done, he brushed her hair for her until it hung smoothly down her back, and trying not to look too eager, he took her hand and let her into his bedroom and over to the bed.