Authors: Mary Adair
Chapter Three
Golden Dawn shifted closer to the carcass, peering over the remains of a deer. The days passed so quickly lately, full with exciting play and the continued duties expected of all in the tribe. She enjoyed the break in the usual pattern of daily life upon the arrival of visitors, but now things began to settle back into their regular pace.
As she worked at skinning and dressing the animal, her thoughts, as always, were filled with Raven and how glad she was to have him around again. For a time, she thought him lost to her forever. Now, her dreams were hinting that he might go away again, but he would not be lost to her. She did not want him to leave, but it was a comforting idea he would not ever truly leave her. Though she had yet to understand what the dreams really meant, she knew in her heart that it would be so.
She slid her knife into the joint of the carcass' hind-leg, skilfully removing the hoof before moving on to do the same for the rest of them. Eying the musculature of the beast, she began cutting the skin around the base of the neck, preparing to remove it outright.
Raven rounded the corner of a lodge and paused, “New Moon said you were over here, I have come to help.” He moved next to her, pulling out his own knife. It was a long steel blade protruding from a finely carved bone hilt. It parted the tissue with obvious ease, a testament to the young man's care for his weapon. He continued Dawn's cut from the breastbone, doing so with practiced motions.
She smiled, appreciating the help, “Good day, Little Buffalo.”
His response was a roll of his eyes and a grunt before pointing at the cuts in the skin, “You take that half. I will start on the other.”
The gruff reply only added to Dawn’s amusement. The game to her was in causing him a teasing aggravation, “Fine. Good day,
Raven Who Flies To Meet The Clouds
.” Her tone subtly singsong as she said his name.
Raven gave a tight-lipped smile this time, then spoke in a similar singsong tone, “And good day to you, Golden Dawn
Who Annoys Her Near-Brother.”
Dawn chuckled and was glad that he did as well. After all, her teasing was done in love and she knew he loved her as well. That thought gave her great pleasure. “I am not your sister, young brave.” Dawn murmured.
He did not seem to hear her, and the two continued their work in companionable silence for a time. Soon enough, they had pulled the skin completely away, and were ready to continue cutting the meat. Here they split up, Raven breaking down the deer while Dawn started cleaning the hide.
Neither of them had any problems with undertaking work, hard or otherwise. They always enjoyed a close friendship that returned easily despite the years Raven had been away. As they continued their jobs, silly jokes or idle chatter about upcoming events occasionally broke the silence.
During a lull in their talk, Dawn found herself staring past her work, her thoughts finding a focus she could resist no longer, “Do you think my father is all right?”
Raven turned to look toward the village's front gate, staring out toward the wood, “I don't believe there is anyone more capable than him.” He smiled at Dawn, “I am sure he is doing well. He has only been gone a few weeks. This business he is taking care of has brought back worries he has not had to deal with in years. It takes a while to sift through the past.”
Dawn looked up at him. His presence gave her comfort. “I know, and you are probably right. Chota Town's Red Panther is not likely to stumble unless an entire army rises up against him.”
Raven Cloud chuckled, moving to continue his work cutting up the meat, “I'll agree to that, though I'd still wager on Panther were it to come to such a battle.”
Soon enough, Golden Dawn had need to wash the hide and made her way down toward the village's creek. It did not take her long to complete the process and she was soon headed back taking one of the walkways between lodges.
Dawn rounded a corner, thoughts on her own abilities and the name she might make for herself. Talk of Red Panther often left her to wonder whether she might carry on such a legacy. She did not understand why it did not seem normal for the women here to think in such ways. It was not unheard of for a woman to join in during a battle to help her husband. She had heard stories of how her mother had saved her father
.
‘I am my mother’s daughter’
, she told herself. Some of the others in the village had laughed when she asked about learning to fight. ‘
Mother had not laughed
,’ she smiled at that thought. There had even seemed to be a hint of pride shining in her mother’s face as she struggled to hold her expression neutral.
Near one of the homes she walked past, a group of young braves played among one-another. She knew, as usual for such a group, they were practicing a mix of fighting and stick ball tactics. She had not been invited to take part in their play. “They know I would best them,” she said out loud to herself.
One of the boys suddenly leaped out from behind another structure, landing within arm’s reach in front of her. His feet slapped against the ground and he spread his arms wide, crouching down and giving a mock-roar, “Arrr-raghh!”
Having been so deep in thought at that point, Dawn could not help but jump at the sudden intrusion. The hide slipped from her fingers as she hopped back and away from the perceived threat.
The boy stood from his crouch with a laugh, back arching as he guffawed, “Too bad you are not as bright as your hair!”
Her reaction turned into anger instantly, and she struggled immensely with controlling her expression. Slowly, she crouched, picking up the skin while staring at the ground. She refused to let the village children see that they affected her, determined to be tougher and stronger than they expected. She would be as much a warrior as her mother.
Rising with only a small quiver, she gave a thin-lipped smile at the boy, “A buzzing fly must have startled me, what a pest.”
The young brave laughed again, slapping the outside of his thighs in mirth. He turned to jog back to his friends, calling to them, “She is so strange for a girl, indeed! As you said!”
Golden Dawn brushed away bits of dirt as she walked, feeling annoyed yet proud that she had maintained control. That control almost vanished as Raven stormed up toward her.
“Another one, jumping out at you with that foolish game.”
Dawn shook her head, not wanting to let him see how much it aggravated her too, “That is all it is, a game. The village children know I do not scare easily, I am a challenge.” Admittedly, this was true.
Raven stopped, staring after the boy, “They single you out.”
“Did it not make you stronger, when they did the same while you were younger?” New Moon said as she walked up. She gently pulled the girl's chin up and examined her daughter's face.
Dawn's jaw was clenched. She knew her mother felt it and relaxed her face further. Dawn knew she could not hide her hurt from her mother. New Moon could read her daughter’s every emotion just by looking into her eyes.
Moon kissed her child's cheek, “And she is stronger, too, though I do not like what the boys do.”
Dawn raised her chin slightly, glad of her mother's praise, “And I will grow as strong as you and Father.”
New Moon pulled the deer's skin away from Dawn, smiling, “Yes, I believe you shall. Your spirit is truly that of your father's union with mine. Now go, play with Little Sparrow and Farthest Running Antelope.” She glanced to Raven, “We must speak.”
***
Raven finished wrapping the meat he had carved while New Moon finished cleaning the hide. They both did their tasks in silence of a heavier breed than that shared with Golden Dawn. Moon carefully prepared the skin for storage with a solemn manner that spoke of a troubled mind.
“Your friend, he is a trader?” She finally spoke.
Raven nodded, “Yes. What would you have him do?”
Moon smiled, looking up from her work, “You move quickly to the point. These past years have matured you.”
“I really had no choice but to do just that.”
Her smile faded, “You are still our family, Raven Who Flies To Meet The Clouds. What Panther did was done with reason.”
Raven turned away, arms crossed about his chest. He stared toward the village walls, eyes focused past the points of timber. The silence grew.
“You are still rash, Little Buffalo.” New Moon looked down, finishing her task, “But what of it, perhaps it is a quality you will learn to control.” She continued as his silence went unbroken, “I would ask you to send your friend to the trading post. Perhaps he could ask around.”
Raven turned back, frowning with concern, “You still have no word from Panther? Have you dreamed?” Though angry at the older man, Panther had been the closest thing to a father Raven had ever known. Since his return to the village, his understanding of Panther had grown.
“No.” She raised a hand, stopping the young man from responding, “He is very brave, and very capable, but we had spoken about just this situation. Please, simply ask him this small favor. He must return for more supplies anyway.”
Raven ran his hand over his face, through his hair, “All right. I will go...”
“I need you to stay, let him take care of this...” At his look, she glanced away, “We may need strong braves for a hunt, whether for a trail or for game. I would like it if you were here for any such hunt.”
Letting loose a sigh, Raven raised his hands in mock-defense, “It seems, that once again, I have no choice.” He nodded, “Yet, this I will do.” Stooping, he picked up the packed meat, walking away from New Moon toward Panther's hut. First, he would check on little Funny Face. Those bullies got to her more than she let on, he was sure of it.
Chapter Four
Several of the young men of the village were selected to go out on the hunt. Raven was glad to be included in the party and was looking forward to the trip. It would be a chance to show his ability to others of the village. He hoped it would also help keep his mind off of the disappearance of Red Panther.
He continued to tell himself that eventually the older man would show up. Raven was sure of it. Still, the lack of any word was cause for worry. There were cunning people of power out there, and their purpose was one of death and destruction.
There would be the required preparations to attend before the hunt. Realizing it might be a couple of days before he came back to the village, Raven wanted to spend the morning with New Moon and Golden Dawn. The mother and daughter weaved a set of baskets for the visitor's lodge. Some of the older ones were fraying and had small holes in their bottoms. It was a matter of pride for the village to have a comfortable and well-stocked visitors lodge.
Inside Panther's lodge, Raven sat and half dozed in their presence. Little Fox had developed an affection for Raven and now slept peacefully curled up against his side. Dawn and New Moon spoke quietly, careful not to disturb the peace within the abode.
Dawn’s mind swirled with questions she did not know how to ask. She was glad her mother was quizzing her. Hopefully the conversation would supply an opening for her own questions.
“Tell me of the reason for sickness?” New Moon quizzed and instructed Dawn on the ways of the Cherokee.
Golden Dawn tilted her head to one side, thinking as her basket continued to grow, “The evil spirits, Anisgi'na, affect a body. Something that person has done was impure, or has invited impurity into their life.”
“And who can be said to take the spirit of those who have lost their purity?”
“The spider entangles them and their souls are pulled away toward the darkening land.”
New Moon made to continue this line of thought. Dawn noticed a sudden moment of weakness when Moon’s breath caught in her throat, as she seemed to perceive the subject. Dawn had to agree, it felt ominous to talk of death and illness while they both worried about Panther. Dawn’s worry over her father’s absence had torn at her stomach like a wild animal trying to get out.
“What are some of the sources of dye in making a basket?” Moon changed her questioning.
Raven nodded in his doze, glad of the change of topic as well. It was relaxing to be around those he could trust without any pretense or worry, and the talk of illness had been leading him to tense up unconsciously. His thoughts were becoming troubled, following a well-trod path of question about his purpose and place. He opened his eyes, watching the two weaving their baskets.
Moon had married a white man, and Dawn was a half-breed like himself. The principal people were his brethren, those he felt closest to as a people, but they seemed to judge him constantly. Colonists and Europeans were easier for him to get along with, but they seemed to distrust him or simply could not understand how to treat him.
None of that was present with New Moon or Golden Dawn. Both had similar paths in life to his. As little as he would have liked to admit it, Panther's absence helped. That man was so hard to emulate, standards incredibly high and abilities so intimidating. Mistakes felt like failure beneath such a watchful gaze.
He rubbed his face, interrupting the talk of dyes, “New Moon, would you say that I am one of the people?”
Moon looked up from her basket, and stared straight into Raven's eyes. The barest hint of a frown crossed her features. She turned her gaze back to the work, “Why is it that you look for others to answer the question of where you belong?”
Raven grunted, “Why is it that you answer my every question with a question of your own?”
She shook her head, hiding her mirth, “Apparently you intend to do the same to me.” Raven noticed how Moon tilted her head at Dawn, warning the girl's twinkling eyes not to laugh, “Yet, I ask you only questions that you already have an answer to. You will more likely believe yourself than anyone else. If I give you an answer, you will question it. If you give yourself an answer, you have decided on your own truth.”
“You and Panther always give me the same responses, yet I am no closer to finding this great answer you speak of.” He stood, careful not to disturb Little Fox. He suddenly felt restless as the relaxation from before evaporated, “I have been over the ocean, through towns in England, and through the woods of Virginia, Carolina, to Louisiana. I have not yet found any answers, let alone one that will satisfy my heart.” His fists clenched, and he turned to go.
Moon's amusement disappeared, and she had to put a hand on Dawn's knee to prevent the girl from standing, “Raven Who Flies To Meet The Clouds, be at peace with yourself, first. Above all else, find that peace.”
Raven stopped at the doorway, exhaling slowly. Over his shoulder, he spoke with resignation as he stepped outside, “I am trying.”
New Moon turned to Dawn. “You are free to ask the questions that have been tugging at your spirit.”
Dawn was not surprised by her mother’s statement. Her mother knew her as well as she knew herself. “You saw Father in a vision before he came to the village.” She glanced up at New Moon who smiled patiently.
“Yes.”
“Was that dream the reason my uncle did not request Father be adopted by the Wolf Clan?”
“If Panther were adopted into the Wolf Clan he would not be your father now.” New Moon set her basket aside. “I have long past explained to you why members of the same clan cannot be joined? But…knowing is not always understanding.”
“I understand, Mother. My question is why was Little Buffalo not adopted by Father’s Anisahoni Clan or by your clan, the Wolf Clan?”
New Moon looked at her daughter and Dawn saw the soft black eyes that had comforted her all her life tear up. A small tear escape Moon’s left eye. With a gentle touch, Dawn reached up and wiped the tear away with the back of her finger. “You had a dream. You told the dream to Dancing Cloud and though you refused to see the truth in the message, my uncle understood. Am I not right?”
“You are right, my little one and you are wise…, and you have inherited my gift of dream visions. Am I not right?”
“You are right, Mother. I have dreamed.”
***
In the evening, Raven Cloud stepped out of the village to go to water with thoughts no clearer than earlier. He had hoped to spend the day restfully lounging, but inner turmoil had kept him busy pacing the village in thought. After leaving the gate, he broke into a run, freeing his mind to the physical task.
Instead of taking as direct a path as possible to the cove, Raven sprinted through the forest with abandon. He pushed himself, straining at the limits of his speed and endurance. Questions echoed through his mind that he could not answer.
Panther's extended absence had him wondering about his true father. Raven's childhood need for that figure had been minimal. Men at the trading post had helped him develop as a child, and Panther had taken over completely after the move to Chota Town. As Little Buffalo, he had idolized the one-time Colonel and great warrior. That man had led him to learn the ways of the Principal People, had taught him to be a man.
Now, as he ran, he began to feel a great debt toward Red Panther. That debt felt impossible to repay, and suddenly a new anger arose toward the father that he had never known. It fueled him, urging him into another sprint among the trees. The night was cool, and it kept him running longer than he had intended. Deep into the wood, his purpose beyond the walls remembered, the paths took him back to the hidden pool of water among boulders.
Tossing aside his breechcloth, he plunged into the water headfirst. It was cold, though it seemed to grant him a comforting clarity. He spoke words of ceremony for the hunt, and then swam. Floating on his back, he stared up into the darkening sky. Wispy clouds of white were wrapped in gold and red. Hints of purple lined the airy tufts. To the east, faint pinpoints of light were already shining down against deep blue.
As soon as he stopped thinking about all of his questions, his distress left him. The first hints of understanding whispered to him, but the sound of approaching footsteps brought him out of his state of serenity.
Farthest Running Antelope stepped into the water slowly, wading out until the water covered his shoulders. He disappeared beneath the surface. Rising up again, he spoke the hunt's word. Solemn moments passed, and then he nodded to his friend, “I am going with you tomorrow. We will enjoy a fast hunt.”
Raven Cloud moved to the side of the pool. He was chasing the fleeting thoughts, sensing their importance, “It will be a good hunt, yes. We should be able to keep a quick pace. All who are going are strong runners.”
Antelope nodded, “Yes, though none quiet as fast as me…” he made a dramatic gesture with his hand, “and you, of course.” His laugh echoed off the boulders around them, “I think some of the others are offended that you have returned, so quickly they've lost stature in how they measure up.”
Cloud made a noncommittal shrug, “I have given them little to measure. I left no mark here and have yet to make any new one.”
“Perhaps, but you have grown well, and they see that. Do you doubt your ability?”
Another shrug and the half-breed turned to look back to the stars, “I know what I can do, and where I have grown strong. Still, even a fine gun may explode the first time it fires. I am as unproven as that weapon, you know this.”
Antelope shook his head, already stepping from the water, “You treat yourself with a harshness usually reserved for a terrible enemy.” Strapping his breechcloth back on, the young man crouched down, sitting on his heels, “You earned your new name. You have shown yourself as quick, strong, and dependable.”
Raven took a moment to get out as well, replacing his own scant clothing, “And yet I was still sent away, and I have lost much of what I gained before leaving.”
Antelope rose and put a hand on his friend's shoulder, “Do you think that we all reach some cliff from which there is no greater height to climb? Am I to be expectant of constant respect since I am no longer Runs Far? Or, instead, do I expect nothing while trusting in myself that I will do as best as I can?”
Stepping away, the hand dropped from Raven's shoulder, “We all do our best, I know that.” Raven said as he ran is fingers through his wet hair pushing it back from his face. “Life is a struggle with constant challenge. None deny that.”
“Yet here you are, unable to see. You are a strong warrior, and the village knows it.” Antelope gently scolded his friend.
Raven Cloud made his way to the entrance of the enclosure of boulders, “You say this, but I know that I must prove to be what you believe to be true. But come, we talk too much, and our next day will be long.”
The duo made their way from the cove, breaking into a run that became a race. Farthest Running Antelope made it back to the gate first, but the distance between the two was in inches.