Authors: Lightning
But he felt much of this fiasco was his fault. He had been amusing himself, pure and simple, and now, for the first time in his life, he felt real guilt about something he’d done. He liked Lauren Bradley. More than that, he admired her.
Never in his life had he tried to do anything for someone else. Now, on his maiden attempt, it had turned out poorly.
It was ironical.
It was unfair.
It could not be permitted.
He rubbed his jaw again. Now where in the devil could he find Adrian Cabot, viscount of Ridgely?
Lauren couldn’t sleep. Neither had she been able to eat.
Fitfully, she lit the oil lamp at the side of her bed.
She paced the floor of the room for a while and then went to the window. The street lanterns cast an eerie glow in the mist. It seemed every London night included fog or mist or rain. The streets were empty, so it must be very late indeed. There were only shadows, cast by the diffuse light of the lanterns. It made her think of the house in Maryland, of the strange feeling of being guided, and suddenly she felt it again.
Or maybe it was the need for companionship, the companionship of a woman who had loved enough to give up everything she knew and loved.
Lauren had not been able to read the diary since that night on the ship. She had felt Melissa’s pain and loss too deeply.
But now she reached down into her small trunk and found the volume, opening it slowly.
December, 1861.
It is Christmas Day, and there are only Sam and me to celebrate it. Lucas never returned.
Oh, and yes, and there is little Randall.
1 am determined the child will be a boy … with Randoll’s dark hair and green eyes. A part of my dear husband will still be with me, and I am committed to holding this land, this farm, for him.
It is not easy. The number of marauders increases, and we have buried everything that is valuable, even my engagement ring that once belonged to Randall’s mother. I have written my family about the child, but I have heard nothing. I pray that when this terrible war is over, they will come to accept my marriage and my child.
I
loved Randall so much. I shall always love him, and I shall never regret what time we had. I tremble now when I think of those times I doubted him, and doubted my ability to defy my family and my loyalties. I know now that love is the most important gift one is given, and that it is a sin to throw it aside. Our few days together were worth a hundred years with anyone else. He has given me a joy I will always hold in my heart, and one day I will be with him again …
The entry ended, and Lauren wiped away a tear. She could almost see Melissa now, almost reach out and touch her.
Love is the most important gift one is given.
Lauren thought over the past weeks, how many chances she’d had to confide in Adrian, to believe in the love she felt was there. But something had always stopped her, and now she wondered whether it had been memories of Larry, whether she hadn’t always felt that talking about Larry would be the final betrayal of her brother. Or perhaps she’d felt that way because it meant letting her brother go.
Melissa had reached all the way for her Randall. And she, Lauren, had not. She had given half measure all the way, never truly giving Adrian all he deserved, always holding part of herself back.
But Adrian had known, and he had loved her despite it. He had been waiting for her to tell him. She knew that now, but that knowledge might be too late in coming.
I loved you.
The words had been so desperately thrown out, a cry of anguish.
She knew his pride, and she had stripped him of it. She had to tell him why. She couldn’t run any longer. Not from him. Not from herself.
There were other things she had to do. She had to go back to Nassau and talk to Jeremy. And she had to make things right with her own government.
But she would find Adrian first, explain everything. No more lies or evasions. He had to know her, to understand her, if he was to love her. She just prayed it wasn’t too late.
Rhys Redding finally found his quarry in a dockside tavern.
Adrian sat in a corner drinking, his face lined with weariness and disillusionment.
Rhys sat down without invitation, meeting Adrian’s hostile eyes.
“What in bloody hell do
you
want?”
Rhys reached into his very proper coat, which was very improper in this particular establishment, and took out some papers. He put them on the table and pushed them over to Adrian.
“You offered me a million pounds for Ridgely a few days ago. I’m accepting.”
Adrian glared at him. “I don’t have it anymore. I just bought a ship.”
“Then I’ll take what you have … and the ship. It’s time for a new venture.”
“I don’t want anything from you, Redding.”
“It’s not from me. It’s a debt due. A small matter of a wager, and I take that very seriously.”
Adrian looked at him suspiciously. “What wager?”
Rhys rubbed his chin. It still hurt. He was inviting another blow, and he knew it. “Between your lady and me.”
Adrian uttered a foul curse, and Rhys had the sickening feeling that a second black eye might soon grace his bruised face.
“She’s not my lady,” Adrian finally said, “and take your bloody damned paper and—”
“Don’t be a complete ass.”
“I’ve already been that,” Adrian growled, a muscle jerking in his cheek.
“Miss Bradley offered to wager the only thing of value she had, a cottage in a place called Delaware, in a card game,” he said, conveniently leaving out a few details.
“Delaware?”
Rhys shrugged. “Wherever in hell that is.”
“Why would you do that?” Adrian said accusingly. “Why do you want … ?”
“I don’t,” Rhys said frankly. “But I must say the idea quite intrigued me—a lady willing to put up everything she had for someone else, without wanting that someone to know about it …”
“I’ve never known you to be altruistic.” Adrian’s tone was bitter.
Rhys leaned back and laughed. “Neither has anyone else. Believe me, generosity had nothing to do with it. I was tired of Ridgely anyway—never did see what you liked about it—and it was an amusing way to spend an afternoon. Of course,” he said with a predatory gleam, “I would have preferred to spend it another way, but the lady would have none of that. Unfortunately she seems hopelessly in love with a stiff-necked ass.”
A glimmer of interest shone in Adrian’s eyes. “She won?”
Rhys raised an eyebrow. “My dear boy, of course she didn’t win. I’m afraid you quite misled her about her skills at cards. Every little emotion shows in her eyes.”
Adrian’s eyes went to the paper in front of him. “Then … why did you change your mind?”
“I didn’t sell you the estate before because I don’t like you,” Rhys said frankly. “I don’t like anything you are. Thought I would let you stew a bit longer.”
“Why, then?”
Rhys fixed an unblinking stare on him. “Because of all the ‘ladies’ I’ve ever met, your Miss Bradley is the only real one among them. I figured you couldn’t be quite the ass I thought you were if she loved you that much.” He shook his head. “And then, damn if you didn’t go and prove you were.”
Adrian scowled darkly at him, his mind working rapidly. There was no reason, absolutely no reason at all, for Redding to lie to him. And for all of the man’s somewhat shady reputation, no one had ever accused him of being a liar or a cheat. He was a gambler who was merciless in his playing, in exploiting others, and Adrian would never forgive Redding for what he had done to his brother, drawing him in deeper and deeper.
“I don’t believe you’re doing this out of the goodness of your heart,” he told Redding belligerently.
“That’s your ill fortune,” Rhys said, getting up. “I’ll go after the lady myself. When she discovers what an arrogant bastard you really are, perhaps she’ll be more amenable to my more … gentle ways,” he said with a leering grin.
He didn’t make it all the way to his feet. Adrian’s fist hit him in his good eye, and he went tumbling to the floor, thinking that being a good Samaritan was a damned painful business.
And he was getting angry.
His hand shot out and jerked Adrian’s leg, tumbling him to the floor, and he took great pleasure in landing a powerful blow on Adrian’s chin.
Blow was exchanged for blow as the tavern exploded into noise, the fight igniting other fights until flying fists and legs were everywhere. Sometime along the way, Adrian was no longer fighting Rhys, but they both were fighting the whole bloody lot in the tavern.
Adrian felt a crashing blow on his head, and then everything went black.
Lauren looked for Adrian everywhere. She sent messages to his lodgings. She went down to the docks, but there seemed to be hundreds of ships there, and no one knew the name of his new ship, or his whereabouts.
Sir Giles did his own checking and discovered that Adrian had purchased the ship a day earlier, and had informed everyone he was leaving shortly for the Bahamas. The ship was not moored where it had been, and he could only guess that Adrian had already sailed. Lisa had told him of the encounter with Redding, and Sir Giles was only too aware of Adrian’s bitter past. That he felt the need to leave England was understandable, though disappointing.
Lauren was beyond comforting. That Adrian had left without seeing her was excruciating. Something in her had hoped, even expected, that he would wait for an explanation.
His silence, his leave-taking, meant that his fury had not dissipated. She wondered if it ever would. Had she lost the most important thing in her life, thrown it away so carelessly?
She knew she had to go after him. But she had no money to do so. Her only asset was a cottage thousands of miles away.
Lauren swallowed her pride and told Lisa everything—about her brother, her role in Adrian’s capture, about Rhys. Lisa told Sir Giles privately, and then he called Lauren into his study. She stood like a schoolgirl awaiting censure, but his eyes were uncommonly kind and sympathetic.
“Sit down, Lauren,” he said. “I think we have a great deal to discuss.”
Lauren sat and waited.
“Did Adrian ever tell you about a woman named Sylvia?”
Lauren’s stomach tensed. She shook her head.
“Adrian thought he was in love with her, and she with him, but she was using him while she found a more … suitable husband. He never trusted a woman after that … until you, I think.”
The tenseness in Lauren’s stomach turned to an agonizing knot.
“Adrian,” Sir Giles said, “never had much of a family. His father was a very cold man, even cruel, and his brother a weak libertine who cared for nothing but his own pleasures. After Sylvia discarded Adrian for a much wealthier man and his brother gambled away his heritage, Adrian never really allowed anyone to get very close to him. Oh, he’s a very likable man, but I don’t think he’s ever been able to really care for anyone, not totally. Not until you. That’s why he’s lavished so much affection on that damned monkey of his.”
Sir Giles’s voice softened. “I think he … cares about you because he recognizes that you have the same strength he does … and a brave heart …”
“I’ve … made so many mistakes.”
“But they’ve all come from the heart, Lauren, and I think Adrian will understand that.”
“Will he?” she said miserably.
He nodded. “In fact, I’m surprised he has left … but he’ll be back.”
“I want to go after him.”
“Of course,” he said, smiling. “I know of a ship sailing for the Bahamas tonight.”
She sat up straight in her chair. “If I could borrow passage money … I have property in the United States—I can pay you back.”
He nodded, knowing she would accept no less.
“Thank you. Do you think he can … forgive me?”
Sir Giles looked at her kindly. “For caring about your brother … for loving him—oh yes, I think so. And now we’d better make the arrangements to get you on the ship tonight.”
Rhys looked with disgust at the bulge underneath his shirt where his left arm was held in a sling. He sighed. Broken, it was, devil take it.
He heard a groan from his bed. Finally. He was beginning to think Adrian Cabot was going to die on him. The doctor had cheerfully said it was altogether possible if he didn’t wake soon.
The man had been unconscious two days. Rhys had been out too, for a while. Apparently someone had bludgeoned them both and dragged them into an alley, where they lay God knew how long. When Rhys had finally stirred, all their possessions were gone, and he had an agonizing pain in his arm as well as his head. Adrian was absolutely still. And that diabolical monkey was running around demented.
Rhys had finally convinced someone to help them both to his lodgings. And then he’d called a discreet physician he knew. He was still feeling a curious responsibility, and he didn’t trust hospitals.