Pepped Up and Ready (Pepper Jones #3) (10 page)

I don’t look forward to lunch anymore. Sure, Gran still packs me an excellent lunch box every day, but now that my friends have merged with the popular people (or have we become those people? I don’t even know), it’s gossip central. And a lot of it has to do with me. Indirectly, at least. First I was the reason Ryan and Lisa broke up, and now that that’s old news, people are talking about how Jace Wilder is not the party guy people thought he’d be at UC, and it’s my fault.

“I hear Jace like, stays in his room or is never around. He’s like a hermit or something now that he’s in college!” Dana exclaims before biting into her apple. I think that’s what she eats for lunch every day. And that’s it.

“Who told you that?” Diego, the guy who finally got to be first-string quarterback when Jace graduated, asks.

“Oh, everyone knows it. But you know, like…” and Dana proceeds to list off a dozen of her UC friends. It’s like she paid Diego to ask that question so she could show how popular she is with the college crowd.

The thing is, they all expect me to weigh in. This is a realistic expectation. But true friends wouldn’t gossip about your boyfriend in front of you. At least they don’t say what I know the rumors are saying – that it’s because of me Jace is no fun. Do they ever think that maybe he’s focused on football too? Because that’s the main reason both of us are buckling down. We have high expectations placed on us, and we want to reach our goals. On top of that, we have to go to classes and do homework. Neither of us are in the running for academic excellence, but we don’t want to fail out either.

Thankfully, Zoe gets this, and she tactfully steers the topic away to other gossip – namely, a party they all went to on Saturday night and can you believe that Justin and Delilah broke up after two years together?

“Speaking of Saturday night,” Tina chimes in, “Pepper, I heard you were at a party on campus with Jace?”

All eyes turn to me.

“See? Jace isn’t a hermit after all.” I try not to sound bitchy about it, but it’s hard. Thank you Tina, for contradicting your BFF.

“Didn’t he, like, beat up the president of Sig Beta because he said you were cheating on him with Wesley Jamison?” Tina is relentless.

“No, that’s not what happened.” I don’t want to take the bait, but I know that if I don’t give her
something
, she’ll probably take my silence as an admission I’m cheating on Jace, or worse. “The president was being an asshole.” That gets their attention. I hardly ever curse. “He knows Jace and I are friends with Wes and made some stupid comment about it, I don’t even remember, and Jace got annoyed but that’s about it. It wasn’t a big deal.” I shrug, downplaying the event that was indeed very close to turning into a fistfight, and did actually involve some harsh insinuations about me and Wes.

“So… you and Wesley?” Dana asks.

“Are you serious?” I’m not the meek girl I used to be. I won’t put up with someone asking, in front of my friends, and what I realize is half the lunchroom, if I’m cheating on my boyfriend. “That probably doesn’t even deserve a response but no, of course not.”

I grab the rest of my lunch and stand up to leave. Zoe follows me, and I’m thankful for her camaraderie.

“I’m sorry,” she says beside me when we finally leave the cafeteria and reach the empty hallway. We’re not supposed to be roaming the corridors during lunch period, but whatever.

“It’s not your fault.”

“It kind of is. I mean, I started hanging out with them.”

“Yeah, but so did Rollie and Omar, and I get it. They go to all the parties and have tons of fun. But they suck at having a normal conversation without being total bitches.”

“Whoa, Pepper,” Zoe says laughing, not used to my vengeful comments.

I shrug. “Just saying. And they’d be saying worse about me if I wasn’t there, so maybe I can curb it with my presence.”

“You might actually be enhancing the gossip. They think they know you now which gives them free rein to talk about you.”

I glare at her. “Maybe you
should
be apologizing then.”

“I can break up with them. I don’t think anyone’s feelings would be hurt,” she offers.

“Nah, I’d rather avoid the drama of that going down. By the way… I haven’t heard much about Charlie.”

We’ve arrived at the back doors to the athletic fields and we tacitly agree to break more school rules by opening them and wandering outside.

“Actually, we kind of broke up,” she tells me without much emotion.

I stop walking. “What? Why? When?”

“Chill, chill,” she says, laughing. “You know it was never super serious with us. I mean, yeah, I love Charlie and we’ll always be friends, but we’re not getting married. It’s just hard when he’s off at college a couple hours away and we’ve both got a lot of stuff going on. It was kind of mutual but I guess I brought it up first. It just happened yesterday.”

This news makes me incredibly sad. Which is odd, because Zoe doesn’t even seem fazed. But if they only lasted a few weeks once college started, how can Jace and I make it? I know we’re different, but it’s not like we’ve talked about marriage either. Zoe and Charlie were in love. She still loves him. She lost her virginity to him. And even if Jace and I stay together until I go to UC too, that’s no guarantee of anything either. Ryan and Lisa broke up when college started. Sometimes, no matter how good it’s going, I can’t get rid of this feeling that the odds are against us.

***

I took five full days off from running and my shins still hurt when I ran with the Oregon team. My left one in particular shot acute pain through my body with each step. The girls were all chatting my ears off about the school, which helped distract me a bit, but it was a huge relief when we finished. And then I had to pretend to walk normally the rest of the day.

The weirdest thing was learning that at least a third of the team was injured with something or other. And it seemed like everyone on the team was either in recovery or nursing an old injury. I didn’t know what to make of this, and as I hop on Zoe’s bike back in Brockton on Sunday afternoon, I’m still not sure what to make of my painful shins. Is this something all runners go through and just push through? Or is taking a break part of being a serious runner too? I’m too afraid to admit that I might have the “I” word.

I ride Zoe’s bike to the UC track, unable to run there like I normally would. Just the thought of running makes me feel like puking. My shins feel broken. Slowly and using the railing, I make my way to the top of the stadium stairs, where I have a view of the foothills overlooking the track. It’s empty and the only sound is birds chirping.

It was fun going on a plane again for only my second time, and meeting girls who are as hardcore about running as I am, but it feels so right sitting on these stadium steps. Even with the “I” word haunting me, I know that this track in front of me is where I belong. I can see myself doing 400 repeats with my future teammates, and racing to cheering fans – Jace included. He’ll be off from football in the spring and he’ll come to my meets.

Decision made – or reinforced, more accurately - I check in to see if Jace is around, but he’s lifting weights with his team, so I decide to head to the pool. My phone beeps as I’m hopping back on Zoe’s bike.

Ryan: how was Oregon? Want 2 pool run tonight? No practice today 4 me.

Me: Oregon was fun. Going to pool now.

I figure it’s too last-minute for him, and I’d rather he didn’t join me. It’s not that I agree with Jace that Ryan is only putting on a good guy act, but having a friendship with Ryan isn’t worth hurting Jace. Sure, Ryan’s great at giving running advice, and he’s easy to talk to, but I don’t need him like I need Jace. I can live without Ryan in my life if it means keeping Jace and me on solid terms.

Unfortunately, five minutes into my pool run there’s a loud splash in front of me as I nearly crash into a tan body. Ryan’s grinning at me with those adorable dimples and hair that’s now long enough to give him a surfer-boy vibe. For just a moment the thought crosses my mind that there might be some mischief underneath that sweet appearance after all.

“I hear you’ve been in here every day, sometimes twice a day,” he says in a mock-scolding tone. Okay, knowing my lifting routine didn’t seem that out of the ordinary, but now I’m wondering if he’s keeping tabs on me.

Ryan puts his hands up in an innocent gesture as he treads water. “Relax, the front desk girl told me. She’s the one who talked to Coach Tom about it.”

“Right. Whatever.” Why am I suddenly annoyed with him? Did Jace plant a seed for this purpose? Should I be annoyed with Jace instead? This is too confusing.

“So what’d you think of OU?” He starts pool jogging beside me.

“It was cool, I guess.” But I don’t want to talk about me, especially about an important topic that I haven’t even discussed with my boyfriend yet. “You had your first college race yesterday, right?”

Ryan takes the hint. “Oh yeah, it was just like an unofficial scrimmage thing. You’d be surprised how many people get injured early in the season and end up redshirting. This meet lets people race unofficially so they can still decide to redshirt if they get injured or whatever.” I’ve always known that redshirting was pretty commonplace for football players. They often take freshman year off from college competition, which allows them to get bigger and stronger, but requires being in college for five years. I didn’t know it was common for runners, and apparently not to get bigger or stronger but because of that dreaded word.

“You’re not planning on redshirting, are you?”

“No, I’ve been feeling great. I’m only pool running with you, Pepper, because, well, to spend time with you.”

I turn sharply and give him a look.

“Is that not okay?” he asks innocently, and I scrutinize him, wondering if it’s
too
innocent.

“Probably not, actually,” I say truthfully. “You’re my ex-boyfriend and I have a boyfriend. We should keep our space.” I don’t want to hurt his feelings, but he’s got to see that this isn’t appropriate.

“Yeah, yeah, you’re right.” Ryan nods quickly. “I’m sorry, Pepper.”

When we reach the other end of the pool he climbs out without another word, leaving me feeling like a jerk. He’s just trying to help me out, after all. Right? I study his dejected and embarrassed expression as he walks to the locker room in his swimming shorts. I’m not sure what to think anymore. It was a lot easier when Ryan was just straightforward and one-dimensional.

Two hours later I’ve managed to clean off most of the chlorine and I’ve even dressed up for dinner with Jace at my favorite Mexican restaurant. It’s not quite warm enough for a dress but I wear one anyway, knowing this may be my last opportunity before the weather changes.

Jace is waiting for me in front of the restaurant with flowers when I arrive on Zoe’s bike, which I think I might just keep for good, and I wonder if this is an important date I’ve forgotten. He takes in my flowy dress and cowboy boots and smiles. “Come here,” he tells me, and I easily comply.

“Is there an occasion I’m forgetting?” I ask.

“No, but we haven’t had a real date in a while and I thought it’d be nice.”

“When did you become so romantic?” I tease, leaning on my toes to kiss him on the cheek.

“I think you know when,” he says with a wink as he leads me inside.

The restaurant is family-owned, and apparently the owners are UC football fans because they bring us a bottle of red wine on the house. Jace glances at me in question, and I shrug, thinking a glass of wine might not be so bad. I’ve never had red, and I might not like it, but it feels very sophisticated and adult-like. We’re finishing a chocolate torte and trying to decide which night this week we can have a sleepover when a large group of college guys takes the table near our booth.

Jace glances at them out of the corner of his eye and when his jaw clenches I follow his gaze. I recognize the Sig Beta guys and start to feel a wave of relief when I don’t see Gage Fitzgerald, but my relief is short-lived when he joins the group – at the head of the table, which places him right next to us – a moment later. Just our luck.

Jace reaches for his wallet to leave some bills without awaiting the check. I take one last sip of wine (okay, more like gulp) and grab my jacket and purse. Jace takes my hand and pulls me out of the booth but Gage spots us before we can avoid him.

“Oh, hey guys!” he greets us like old friends. So obnoxious. “Yeah, Pepper, you must have been really hungry after that swim earlier.”

My head whips to Gage at that comment but Jace tugs me along, and I’m proud of him for avoiding confrontation; a year ago that would not have been the case. But the chairs are all pulled out and we can’t get through easily.

Gage keeps talking in that cocky voice of his. “You spend a lot of time in bathing suits with other guys. You know we’ve got a hot tub at Sig Beta that doesn’t require bathing suits, right? Can’t guarantee I’ll take you out to dinner afterward like Wilder, here, though.”

Before I can even process the insult, Jace has Gage by the collar against the wall and his chair is knocked over. Gage must have been expecting a reaction, but his face has gone white with the pressure Jace is putting on him. I can’t hear what Jace is saying, and before any of the frat brothers can intervene, Jace has dropped Gage, who slumps to the floor before quickly straightening himself up. Jace hurries me out of the restaurant, mumbling a “sorry” to our waiter, who is standing mouth agape when we pass him.