Peppermint Creek Inn (49 page)

It had taken every ounce of willpower not to wake her, to ask her to come with him.

But too much danger surrounded him. Hadn’t he proved it when she’d been shot?

He let his hot feet sink into the coolness of the still water.

Four weeks. Exactly four weeks ago today, he’d stood here on the beach, clad only in his underwear, much the same way as he did tonight.

Back then Sara had tried to stop him from going into the frigid waters. He only wished she could be here now with him, talking him out of going into hiding.

He looked out over the bay at the island where he’d stashed that copy of the tape. The island stood dark and giant, popping out of the moonstruck bay like a huge whale, taking a midnight swim.

Matthew shook his head at the silly thoughts creeping into his head. Lack of sleep did that to him. Kept him off balance.

Lightning flashed somewhere to the north and a welcome cool wind picked up, brushing softly against his naked skin.

It felt good. Soothing almost.

He should be with Sara. They should both be lying here on the beach, intertwined in each other’s arms, watching the storm come in.

Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath.

Shit! He missed her so much he could even smell her sweet minty aroma waft over him. Tugging at him. Luring him into her arms. Her hushed whispers comforting him, telling him everything would be all right.

At his thoughts about Sara, his cock hardened, thickened, pressed fiercely against his prison-tight underwear.

A sting needled at his elbow and he cursed wildly, quickly swatting a pesky mosquito. Then he cursed again when another one bit behind his left knee.

A soft giggle split the air from somewhere behind him. His heart leapt with joy.

“Sweetness?” he whispered beneath his breath. He was too stunned to do anything but to stand there.

“Got something here for you,” she said softly.

Slowly he turned around, his breath catching in his throat.

She looked so beautiful. So damned beautiful clad in a sweet body-hugging Spring floral dress, her hair tumbling down over her shoulders, covering her breasts. He barely noticed the white box she held in her hand as a strong desire erupted within him.

The urge to reach out and run his fingers through her silky strands was powerful. He wanted to push aside the thin fabric covering her breasts, to touch her naked skin, suckle her nipples. To press her naked body onto the sand and sink his throbbing cock into her warm, welcome pussy and feel her bucking beneath him as he thrust into her over and over again just to show her how much he loved her.

It took every ounce in his being not to do it.

“Baked you that peppermint cheesecake you hinted at during our picnic.”

The wonderful picnic. He could still imagine the sweet taste of her velvety cream gushing against his lips, as he’d tongue-fucked her on that quilt. It seemed so long ago.

Her cheeks were flushed in the moon glow as her gaze riveted to his engorged erection. Oh God! He wanted to take her into his arms so bad, the hurt twisted through him like a sharp knife.

“How’d you find me? Did Garry tell you?”

“You left this behind.” She held up an old rusty tin pot he’d found in one of the Jackfish buildings. He’d been sure she would enjoy fixing it up and entering it into one of those contests. He’d left it in her painting loft, sure she wouldn’t be going up there for at least awhile now that she was too busy with the new log building of Peppermint Creek Inn being erected.

He kicked himself for not being more careful. It had been a stupid gesture now that he thought about it. And it could very well have signed her death warrant.

“Were you followed?”

“No. I took every precaution. You know it’s still a bit cold for camping out in a boathouse all by yourself. Don’t you think you should come home? Have some of this yummy cake?”

She held the box up.

Matthew swallowed the tightness suddenly clogging his throat.

Home. Home-baked food. Sara.

It sounded so good. So safe. But with him around, her home would only turn into a death trap. He’d almost gotten her killed once. He wouldn’t take the chance again.

He willed himself to stiffen against the love that shone like jewels in her eyes. He had to tell her why it had to be this way. Why they couldn’t see each other ever again.

Why he could never go home with her.

“Before I went undercover to work for Robin, I dreamed of a life with a woman like you. I dated. Came close to getting married. Once. But she couldn’t handle my being a cop. And I wouldn’t give up my work. She settled on a plumber instead.”

Sara stood still. Barefoot and picture pretty as she smiled at him. A sensual smile.

“So what are you trying to tell me?”

“I was an undercover cop. A lot of the time I had to wear a wire. A hidden microphone hooked onto a recording device. I slept with my eyes open. I carried two guns besides my police issue one. Both were ‘throwaway’ guns, in case I needed to kill someone in self-defense. We couldn’t afford any questions that could break my cover. One I hid in my boot, the other small enough so I could hide it with the wire. Both the wire and gun were taped to my groin.”

“I guess you can’t go to the bathroom while you’re working,” Sara whispered softly.

Dammit, the woman wasn’t getting the point.

“I went by a different name while I was undercover. If they find out my real identity, everyone in my family, anyone around me, could get killed. I’m known now as a rat, a cop who broke the code of silence. I crashed through the blue wall the police hide behind and now I’ve got many enemies who would love to see me squirm as they slit your throat.”

“I’m not scared.”

“You should be.” Matthew sighed. “What it comes right down to is, I’m not husband material. Not even good father material.”

“Are you finished?”

“No.” Matthew took a deep breath and forced his voice to grow cold, emotionless.

“You were just a distraction for me, Sara. A one night stand. Heck, a two night stand. I don’t love you,” he lied. “There’s nothing between us. Please, just leave me alone.”

He couldn’t bear to go on. The words had impacted her strongly. He could tell by the way her face turned milky white. He’d done his job, and it made him sick to his stomach.

Quickly, so he wouldn’t change his mind, he brushed past her stock-still form.

—

Sara found him inside their boathouse. The same one they’d made love in during their stay at Jackfish.

He was packing.

“Why are you lying to me?”

“I’m not.” He didn’t look up.

She watched him roll the sleeping bag up. With madly shaking hands, he attempted to tie it up with its attached strings. After a couple of attempts he succeeded, then quickly shoved it into its carrying case.

“You’re scared, aren’t you?” Sara asked.

Matt stopped cold. He straightened and faced her.

Pain, and hurt and fear shone bright in his emerald eyes.

“Yes. Scared shitless,” he admitted. He didn’t reach out to her. But he wanted to. She could read it in his eyes. He wanted to and it was killing him not to.

“Matthew—”

“What if it happens again, Sara? What if some guy who’s got it in for me comes gunning for me and gets you instead?” His eyes grew wide with panic. He shoved a shaky hand through his hair. “What if it happens and—”

“Listen to me. You’re living with ‘what ifs’. What if this happens? What if that happens? What if it doesn’t happen, Matt? What if it doesn’t?”

“What if it did?” his voice caught. He sat down on top of his rolled sleeping bag, looking up at her. His mouth clenched tight.

He was shaking. Shaking so hard.

“Stop it! Just stop it! Don’t listen to those ‘what ifs’. Because if you do, they’ll drive you to grab your gun and put it to your head. You don’t want that to happen do you?”

Matthew let out a long breath. “Maybe it’s better that way.”

At his answer, she felt the anger inside her unleash itself.

“No! It’s not! Damn you! It’s my life, too! No one has the right to say how I live it. No one. Just me. Do you understand?” She ignored his shocked look. “My God! You don’t own me. I had a life before I met you, and I’ll have a life if you don’t want me. But I want you in my life. Danger. Risks and all. I love you for who you are. Not what you do.

“So why don’t we just sit back, enjoy each other’s company and see what happens? But if you don’t want me, if you truly don’t love me, at least look me square in the eye and tell me! At least have the guts to do that!”

For a long time, he didn’t speak. He sat stiff as a board upon the rolled sleeping bag, his jaw clenched so tightly, Sara noticed the muscles in his cheeks twitch abnormally.

Behind him, a flash of lightning lit up the glassless window, but she wasn’t afraid of the storm brewing outside.

She was afraid of the storm inside him.

His answer terrified her. What if he did look her in the eye and tell her to get lost?

She’d come here with full intentions of fighting fiercely for him. Could she let him go so easily as she’d said? Could she simply turn around and walk away?

Rain began to pitter against the moss-covered shingles on the roof. She barely heard it. She scarcely felt the cool, misty drizzle sprinkle against her bare arms as it blew into the boathouse through the open window.

The cool wind did little to soothe her hot tears.

He wasn’t going to say anything. He was going to let her walk away.

Her body began to tremble. Not because she was cold, but because she had been wrong about Matthew. She’d let him into her soul. Inside her heart. And now he was ripping her heart apart. Not by his words but by his silence.

How can she fight silence?

Feeling as if she might collapse, Sara turned to leave.

“Life without you is impossible. I do love you, with all my heart and soul.” His hoarse whisper made her turn around.

He was standing now. Tears glimmered in his eyes.

With one shaky hand he reached out, his trembling fingers were cold as he gently brushed away the tears gushing over her cheeks. Then, without warning he swept her into the safety of his loving arms.

“I’m sorry I left you,” he whispered softly against her ear. “Seems like I’ve wasted a lot of time.”

“You needed the time, Matthew. Just don’t ever leave me again. Promise me?”

“Okay. Okay. I promise,” he chuckled then his voice grew serious again. “We can probably never go home. I hope you know that. I’ll be living like this. Out of tents. In safe houses all over the world. Moving all the time. I have to testify because of all the evidence I’ve collected over the years. It could take years. I’ll be taking a lot of people down.”

“I’ll go anywhere with you. For as long as it takes. For better or worse.”

“But what about Peppermint Creek? Your peppermint product business?”

“I’ve already recruited Garry and Hilda. They’re moving into the house as we speak. And I’ve rehired a couple of last year’s peppermint helpers to assist them with the ins and outs of the business end of things.”

“You think of everything.” He softly brushed his lips against hers. A scorching brush that left her aching for more.

“I don’t want to be apart from you anymore. I want you to make love to me,” she whispered, desperate to feel him inside her again. Anxious to feel his love.

Without hesitation, his trembling fingers were at the front dress buttons. In seconds, his warm hands were sliding inside the opening, cupping her quickly swelling breasts.

Immediately her nipples grew harder, desire pulsed in her pussy.

Oh, God! It felt so good to have him touching her again.

“I’ve quit this undercover stuff. When the trial is over, if it’s safe, we might be able to move back to the inn and raise our kids there, but the chances are really slim.”

“As long as we’re together we can live anywhere.”

He grinned his gorgeous crooked grin that left her breathless. His gaze dropped to the box containing the cake she held in her hand.

“The cake can wait,” Sara whispered huskily. Her fingers let go of the string and the box dropped at her feet. Hopefully the fall wouldn’t totally ruin it, but at the moment she didn’t care. She had more important things to do, like make love with the man of her heart.

She found herself eyeing the ropes dangling at the moorings. One of her fantasies zipped into her thoughts. A fantasy of him tying her down, of being his sexual hostage. Of him taking her in the ass from behind as he’d once said he’d do the last time they’d been in this boathouse.

She heard his breath quicken as he followed her gaze, his eyes flared with arousal and understanding.

“I’ve missed you so much,” he whispered, his fingers tweaking her hard, aching nipples to this side of pain. His firm mouth felt like an aphrodisiac as his warm lips slanted over hers. She trembled against him when the hard head of his huge cock prodded against her quickly drenching pussy lips.

Oh, yes! She’d missed this.

She’d lain awake in bed, alone every night, the erotic scent of him on her pillowcases, her vibrator never enough to satisfy the sexual cravings he’d unleashed during their brief time together.

Now she had him back and she wanted him to fuck her senseless.

“I’ve been wearing one of those inflatable butt plugs off and on over the past month, preparing myself for you. I took it out just before I came here,” she said softly as he broke the intoxicating kiss and unbuttoned her dress allowing her to step out of it.

He cursed softly at her words, or maybe he swore at the fact she wore no panties and now stood totally naked in front of him. Erotic heat mounted inside her, and she trembled with a desire so fierce and wanton she just about climaxed at the lusty way his gaze caressed her every curve. He let go of her, and bent over to release the sleeping bag from its restraints. Rolling it open on the nearby single air mattress, he helped her onto her hands and knees instructing her to do a cat stretch by placing her head down, her arms lifting out over her head, her legs apart and her ass up in the air.