Perfect on Paper (30 page)

That Thursday, the three of us met at the Kilkenny after work for a beer.

“I don’t believe it,” I said to Andie. “Really?”

She pushed her hair behind her ears and nodded. “Yep. When the check came, he looked right at me and said, ‘Shall we split it?’”

“No way,” McKenna said.

“Way,” Andie said, nodding again.

I sipped my beer. “And this was a first date?”

“Yep, first date.”

“And he had asked you out?”

“Yep.”

I tilted my head to one side. “And then he asked you to pay for half of dinner?”

She nodded again. “Yep.”

“I don’t get it,” I said.

Andie blew a bubble. “Join the club.”

“Do you think he’s in the closet?” McKenna said. Every girl we knew in San Francisco had asked that question at least once. “Maybe he just goes on random dates now and then so no one will suspect?”

Andie put her finger on her lip. “You know, now that I think about it, he could be. He
was
really well-dressed. So maybe. Or maybe he’s just rude.”

“He’s rude either way,” I said. “How did you meet him?”

“At the gym,” she said, nodding slowly. “Yep, I should have known better. The guys I meet at the gym always turn out to be gay.”

“But you never go to the gym,” I said.

She smacked her gum and smiled. “And now you know why.”

“That would make a good Honey Note,” I said.

“Everything’s a Honey Note for you these days,” McKenna said.

I smiled. “Yep, I’m done with dating to find love. Now I’m just using it as research.”

“My friend Max told me an amazing dating story the other day,” Andie said.

“That nice guy with the awesome apartment you call the Maxipad?” I said.

She nodded. “Uh huh, and get this. He took a girl out for the first time the other night, and at dinner she flat-out asked him how much money he has in his bank account.”

“She did not,” McKenna said.

“Oh yes, she did,” Andie said.

“I will never understand people,” I said. “What did he say?”

“Get this,” Andie said. “Before he could even answer, the girl’s BOYFRIEND showed up at the restaurant and started yelling at her.”

“No way,” I said.

“Way,” Andie said. “He starts yelling at her for cheating on him, and get this: she pretends she doesn’t know who he is!”

“You’re kidding,” McKenna said.

Andie shook her head. “Totally true. She acted like she’d never seen him before.”

“That’s awesome,” I said. “What a nut job.”

“Total nut job,” Andie said. “And when the guy finally left, she
still
wouldn’t admit she knew him. She told Max her ex-boyfriend must have put the guy up to it.”

“Yeah, sure he did,” McKenna said.

“I will never understand people,” I said, taking a sip of my beer. “So I’m assuming she didn’t get to see the famous Maxipad?”

Andie laughed. “Hardly.”

“Speaking of great apartments,” McKenna said, “are you ladies up for watching the Blue Angels at Davio and Alessandro’s annual roof deck party this weekend?”

“Yes!” I said. “I love that party, and I love Fleet Week. The planes have been whizzing by my window all week. It’s so loud, but I love it when …”

I stopped talking.

“You love it when what?” Andie said.

I looked over her shoulder. “Sorry. I got distracted. Check out that tall guy over there, but be casual about it. Isn’t that Darren from Left at Albuquerque?”

Andie and McKenna both whipped their heads around to look.

“Ladies, that was hardly casual,” I said with a sigh.

“Who?” McKenna said.

“Where?” Andie said.

“The one with the brown hair in the white button-down shirt, by the pool table,” I said. “Andie, remember we met him that night we went to Lefty’s after I ran into Aaron at the Marina Safeway? The night of the double Darrens?”

Andie laughed. “Ah, yes, the double Darrens. How could I forget?”

“Well, it turns out that cute Darren is engaged to that nightmare Mandy at work.”

They both looked at me.

“The Mandy who practically stole your job?” Andie said.

I nodded.

“That’s her fiancé?” she said.

“Yep,” I said.

McKenna looked back over at Darren. “He’s really cute.”

I sighed. “I know. I ran into them a couple months ago when I was on this awful date. It was so embarrassing, because at Lefty’s I’d given him my card hoping he would ask me out, but he never called. And then I find out he’s engaged to bitch woman.”

“Oops,” Andie said.

“Exactly,” I said. “So I pretended not to recognize him, but I don’t think he bought it. Oh well, whatever. If he’s marrying that nut job, he’s not my type anyway.”

Just then the guy standing next to us at the bar turned to face us. He shook his head and frowned. Then he looked right at me.

“Actually, Mandy’s a really cool girl, not that you would know anything about being cool. I’ll be sure to tell her you said hi,” he said. Then he picked up the beers he’d ordered and walked across the room to where Darren was standing.

Holy crap.

I buried my face in my hands. “Oh my God oh my God oh my God, please tell me that didn’t just happen. Please please someone tell me that didn’t just happen.”

Andie nodded. “Apparently it did.”

“That was ugly,” McKenna said.

My cheeks were on fire. “Good Lord, could I shove my entire leg further down my throat?”

“This town is way too small,” McKenna said. “You literally never know who might be standing right next to you.”

“I know,” I said. “But usually it’s Brad Cantor, not the friend of a girl who stole my job and hates me.”

McKenna put her arm around me. “It’ll be okay, Wave, maybe he won’t even say anything.”

“Or if she already hates you, who cares what he tells her?” Andie said.

I shook my head and felt the tears welling up in my eyes. “I can’t believe I just did that. Me and my stupid big mouth.”

Just then Andie’s cell phone rang.

“Hello? Hey … okay … okay … yeah … got it … okay … I’m on my way … Bye.” She hung up and threw the phone in her purse.

“Who was that?” McKenna said.

Andie smiled and stood up. “Booty call.”

I wiped a tear from my eye and laughed. “Did you really just say that? What about all that talk about how hard it is to find a date?”

She blew another bubble and popped it. “Who said anything about a date? Gotta run. Bye, sweeties. Hang in there, Waverly.”

McKenna stood up too. “I’ve gotta get going as well. Unfortunately, I have a seven a.m. conference call tomorrow. Our East Coast office has no shame.”

“I’m right behind you guys.” I stood up and kept my back to Darren and his buddy. “All I want to do right now is get the hell out of here.”

“Sounds like tomorrow might be a good day for you to call in sick,” Andie said.

I finished off my beer and put it on the bar. “No kidding. After that performance, I might as well call in dead.”

The following Monday night, I met up with McKenna after work for a yoga class. On the way out of the studio, I stopped in my tracks and put my hands on my hips.

“Frick, I left my purse in my office,” I said. “Just what I needed to top off this fantastic night.” I was already annoyed because I’d been stuck next to one of those inappropriate yoga guys for the entire class. I wanted to punch him after all that endless grunting and groaning and moaning, and then when he started snoring in the final relaxation pose—the main reason I even
went
to yoga—I nearly lost it.

“Can’t you just get it tomorrow?” she said.

“Nope, it’s got my keys in it.”

She patted my head. “Now you know why I’ve been telling you for years to give me a set of your keys.”

I looked at her and held out my hand. “Have we met? I’m Waverly Bryson, not some responsible adult.”

“Fine, fine. Let’s go.”

“It shouldn’t take long. The security guard knows me. He can let us in.”

Five minutes later, we were in the dark offices of K.A. Marketing, the only light coming from the soft glow of the exit signs and the kitchen, which for some reason was always lit.

“This is creepy,” McKenna said. “I’m heading to the kitchen to get some water. Meet me at the elevator?”

“Sure. I’ll just be a minute.” I walked down the long hallway to my office and grabbed my purse. I was about to head back to the elevator when I thought I heard someone crying. I paused for a second.

Crying?

Then I noticed a single light on down the opposite hall. I walked slowly toward the noise.

“Hello? Is anyone here?” I said.

The crying stopped. I walked toward the light and poked my head into the doorway.

Mandy Edwards was sitting at her desk, wiping tears from her cheeks.

“Mandy, are you all right?” I said.

She pushed a few strands of hair away from her face and nodded. “I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“As fine as I can be, I guess.”

I looked down at my hands and then up at her watery green eyes.

“Um, what’s wrong?” I said.

She sniffled. “I don’t know what to do.”

“What do you mean?”

Silence.

“Mandy?”

She put her face in her hands and started crying again. “I found out that my fiancé has been cheating on me.”

Her words were so unexpected that for a moment I just stood there.

“Oh God, I’m sorry, Mandy,” I finally said.

She coughed, and the tears began to stream down her cheeks.

I didn’t know what else to say, but it didn’t seem right to leave her there, so I sat down on the chair across from her desk and let her cry.

And cry.

After about thirty seconds, I finally spoke. “Is there anything I can do? You two looked so happy when I saw you together.”

She coughed again. “I love him, Waverly. God, I love him so much. I thought he was so perfect, you know?”

I nodded. Boy, did I know.

“But part of me has always known that he wasn’t who I thought he was. Or who I hoped he was,” she said.

Was this really Mandy Edwards sitting in front of me?

I handed her a tissue. “Well, I guess it’s better to find out now than after you were married, right?”

She blew her nose. “I know, I know. And I know I have to break it off. It’s just so much harder than I thought it would be. I … I just don’t want to be single again.”

I stared at her. For a second it was like looking in a mirror.

I took a deep breath. “Mandy, believe me, I know how you feel. I
really
do. But you can’t be with someone who isn’t right for you just so you won’t be alone.”

“That’s easy for you to say,” she said.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, you’re from around here, you went to college here. You’re not alone, but I am. Besides Darren and my roommate, I don’t really have any friends in San Francisco. And no matter what I do, I can’t seem to make any, especially here at work.”

I bit my lip.

“I know I’m not that great with people sometimes, and ever since I transferred to this department, all I’ve wanted to do is fit in. But no matter how hard I try, people seem to hate me,” she said.

“People don’t hate you, Mandy,” I said softly.

“C’mon, Waverly, every time I try to talk to you, you can’t run away fast enough. And I hear the things you say about me.” The tears were still streaming down her face.

Me and my big humongous mouth.

“And I know what other people around here think about me. I know everyone resents me for taking over the JAG account.”

I twisted my right earring. “Well, that’s not exactly true.”

“Please, I’m not stupid.”

I couldn’t think of anything to say, so I just looked down at my hands.

She blew her nose again. “When Jess offered me the account, I thought maybe I could do it. I thought maybe I could show everyone that I do belong here. But I was wrong.”

I kept looking at my hands.

“I didn’t want it, you know,” she said.

I looked back up at her. “You didn’t?”

She dabbed at her eyes with a tissue. “Waverly, I was already so over my head with Adina Energy, you don’t even want to know.”

“You were?”

She nodded. “And if you remember, I tried to ask you for help more than once, but I don’t have to remind you what your reaction was.”

“I … I …” I didn’t know what to say. She had really been asking for
help?

“So believe me, taking on another account was the last thing I wanted,” she said.

I handed her another tissue. “But I thought—”

“Well, you thought wrong.”

“Then why did you agree to take the JAG account on as well?”

She dabbed her eyes. “What was I supposed to do? Tell Jess that I couldn’t handle it?”

I took a deep breath. “Wow, I honestly had no idea you felt that way. I thought you were happy running both accounts.”

“Well, I’m not. I’m drowning, okay? Thank God Kent and Nicole know the JAG account so well, because without them I’d be in serious trouble.”

I handed her another tissue. “Why didn’t you say something?”

“What could I say? I’d already asked you for help more than once. Why do you hate me so much anyway? What did I ever do to you?”