Read Pet Noir Online

Authors: Pati Nagle

Tags: #mystery, #science fiction, #humor, #cat

Pet Noir (24 page)

“I don't think they taste very good,” I said, padding on down the path. “In fact, I think they're poisonous.”

“Oh. Quel dommage.”

Leila sat down on the shore and licked her shoulder. I sat next to her, gazing out at the water, then leaned over and licked behind her ear. She purred and kissed me back.

“Shall we find someplace a little more comfortable?” she asked, lidding her golden eyes at me.

“Right this way,” I said, starting toward the bushes.

Leila padded along beside me. As I stepped into the thicket, I sensed something was wrong. I moved in front of Leila, making her stop. Stood still, sniffing, listening.

No sound, but there was definitely a smell that didn't belong here. Smelled like human male, none too clean.

“Stay here,” I whispered to Leila, and advanced cautiously into the thicket.

The fur at the back of my neck was standing up, and my tail fluffed out to twice its normal width. In the thickest part of the bushes, I found it. Human male, prone, not moving.

My first instinct was to run, but I had to check one thing. I moved up to the head. After watching for a few seconds, I sighed with relief. He was breathing.

He also looked familiar. I frowned, stepping closer to look at his face.

I was right. It was Devin's missing person number one. I recognized him from the security holo.

“What's the matter?” Leila asked as I returned.

“There's a human in there. I have to call Devin.”

“Why, cher? We can find someplace else.”

“Sorry. This is important.”

I reached into the shoulder pouch under my left fore and took out my com. I glanced around to make sure no one was watching, then thumbed it.

“What?” Devin answered after a second. Mr. Cheerful he was not.

“Got something for you to look at, Dev.”

“Can't. I'm working.”

“This is work. I'm two meters from your first absentee.”

“What? Where?”

“Easy, Dev. You have to come officially find him, OK? Don't bring the brass band with you.”

“OK, but where are you?”

I told him, and told Leila I'd have to wait for him. She graciously consented to help me pass the time. The thicket being occupied, we curled up together under a bench by the shoreline and watched the fireflies play until Devin arrived.

“Is he alive?” Devin demanded as I came out.

“Yeah. I think he's asleep. In here.”

I led Devin into the thicket. He made a hell of a lot of racket pushing his way in there, but the guy on the ground didn't wake up. Devin bent over him, frowning.

“That's him, all right. Albert Delgado. How'd he get in here?”

“Don't know. That's how I found him.”

Dev took out a light and peered at the ground, muttering. I sniffed my way around the thicket. Footprints, most of which probably belonged to the gardeners. I found some broken twigs on the bushes on the far side and called them to Devin's attention.

“Maybe he walked in under his own steam,” I suggested.

“What, he's been sleeping here for more than three shifts? Just decided to take a nap instead of going home? No, there's gotta be more to it.”

“When's the last time you ate, Devin? Because you sound just a little cranky.”

He shrugged it off and called in the find to HQ. Before the recovery team could invade I returned to Leila. The magic had gone out of the evening, so I offered to escort her home.

“But cher, how will I get in? Mamzelle will be asleep.”

“I can take care of that. Unless you'd rather cuddle up somewhere until morning?”

She sat down by a jasmine bush to think about it. The spray of white flowers, heavy with perfume, was a perfect backdrop for her lithe, dark body. She twitched her tail thoughtfully.

I twitched my nose. The jasmine was a bit much for me, but you don't deny a lady like Leila her little pleasures.

Ordinarily I would have hoped for her to decide on the cuddling, but I was curious about Delgado and wanted to hear more about the case from Devin. I was glad, then, when Leila decided she'd rather sleep in her own plush kitty donut. I walked her back to Elsa's, pausing by a potted ficus a few meters away.

“Wait here,” I told her. “When the door opens wide enough, run in.”

Leila crouched behind the massive pot while I proceeded to Elsa's. I sat before the door and let out a long, loud yowl. It took several more yowls, but the door finally opened and Elsa peeked out. She had a blue sleeping mask pushed up on her forehead over her tousled blonde hair.

“Stop that, Tux! You can't see her!”

Oh, yes I can, I thought, glancing toward Leila. She was ready to run, but I had to get Elsa to open the door wider and distract her so she wouldn't see Leila sneak in. I yowled again.

“Go away!” Elsa snapped.

“Rrrr-ow-OOOOOOOOW.”

She pulled off her sleeping mask and threw it at me. I dodged, then stepped over and picked it up, careful not to sink my teeth in. It smelled suspiciously of beauty-aid type stuff.

Elsa's pretty mouth dropped open. “Give me that!”

I paced in a circle, ending up two meters from the door. I sat down and looked up at her, dangling the mask from my teeth.

“Rrrph?”

“Dammit, Tux!”

The door slid abruptly shut. I waited, listening to barefooted stomping and shuffling noises. Then it opened again and a perfectly manicured hand emerged, holding a squirt bottle.

I hate getting wet.

I took off, running in the opposite direction to Leila's hiding place. Elsa followed, dressed in a pink silk robe, squirting away. She hit the walls, the floors, one of the paintings, and managed a glancing shot across my right hind.

I dropped the blue mask and did a one-eighty, catching Elsa off guard as I galloped back past her, my claws scrabbling on the polished floor. She tried to squirt me again but missed. In the few seconds it took her to retrieve the mask, I was out of range.

I glanced in the open door of her apartment as I went past. Leila stood just inside, peering out at me.

“Seeya, kiddo,” I said, flicking my tail in farewell.

“Goodnight, cher,” she called as Elsa came stomping back.

I kept running until I heard Elsa's door slide shut, then slowed to a jog. Not until I had reached the lifts did I pause to repair the insult to my coat done by Elsa's squirt bottle.

A lift arrived and I got in, pondering about Albert Delgado. All I knew about him was that he was a dock worker and had gone missing after his last shift. Devin was right, he probably hadn't just decided to spend a whole day sleeping in the bushes. I've been known to enjoy that, but it isn't a normal pastime for humans.

“Rotunda,” I said to the lift. I'd cruise HQ and see if they'd learned anything. The chief would undoubtedly question Albert as soon as medical checked him out OK. Maybe they had already learned where he'd been.

Ted, a hopper who was the newest member of the team, was at the front desk. “Hi, Leon,” he said in a thin, nasal voice.

All the security guys call me by my real name, at Devin's insistence. It's not that I mind “Tux” so much, it's a matter of respect. Most of the guys think I'm Devin's pet, and because I hang around HQ a fair amount they treat me like a team mascot.

I walked over to the desk, tail high, ready for a handout. Ted, whose real name was unpronounceable or we'd have used it, reached into the bag from which he was snacking and tossed a small, green, lumpy round thing my way. It rolled to a stop in front of me and sniffed it. I had no clue what it was, except that it didn't smell like anything I wanted to eat.

I batted it around the floor for a minute, just to show my appreciation of the gesture, then knocked it down the corridor and chased after it. When I was out of Ted's sight, I dropped to a walk and went on, leaving the green thing to its fate.

The conference room door was open and half the security team was packed in there. The other half were probably out combing the station for the guy who was still missing.

Bedraggled but now awake, Albert Delgado sat at the foot of the table, a coffee cup in front of him. Chief Wright stood next to him, still in the natty gray clingsuit he'd worn to Elsa's.

“But how did you get there?” he demanded.

Albert shook his head. “I don't know.”

The chief paced around a bit. “All right, let's take it from the top. Where did you go after you left work?”

Albert frowned as if trying to recall, then his face went strangely slack and his eyes got glassy. “I don't remember.”

I shot a look at Devin, who was slouched in one of the cushy chairs around the table. He hadn't noticed me, so I slipped under the table and went over to him, rubbing against his legs to let him know I was there. I sat down by his feet, listening. Something was bothering me about old Albert here. His tone of voice seemed sincere, but something was off.

I hopped onto Devin's lap. Apart from letting out a soft grunt, he ignored me. I put on my cute kitty look and watched Albert while the chief questioned him. He gave no sign of holding back. Seemed genuinely confused about his disappearance, as confused as we were.

“What happened at the end of your shift?” the chief asked.

“I clocked out and headed for a drink with a couple of buddies.”

The chief pounced on that. “Which buddies? Who?”

Albert frowned in concentration, then got the glassy look again. “I don't remember.”

“What do you mean, you don't remember?”

Albert just shook his head. The chief leaned his fists on the conference table and got in his face.

“Where did you go for drinks?”

Albert went blank again. “I don't remember.”

Suddenly I realized it was the blank look that was bugging me, and why. I'd seen it before.

In Pulsar. On the faces of the guys watching the Firefly.

My hackles rose and my claws dug into Devin's thigh. It was involuntary. So was Devin's yell. I hastily jumped off his lap, ducking under the table again.

“Dammit, Leon!”

I poked my head out and caught his eye. He frowned at me, rubbing his leg. I flicked my ears twice, my way of telling him that I'd like a word in private. He glared at me, then heaved himself out of the chair.

“‘Scuse me, Chief. Leon and I need to have a talk.”

Before I could move, Devin swooped down and grabbed me by the scruff of my neck. I let out a yelp, and saw the chief's eyes bug out as Devin carried me out of the conference room.

In the hall he dropped me to my feet. I was mad, almost mad enough to leave him to his own devices, but I knew he needed to hear what I had to say. Silently fuming, I trotted beside him down to the office he shares with Sheila and Ralph. Devin shut the door and slumped into his chair.

“Was that necessary?” I demanded, glaring at him.

“Payback. You drew blood.”

Devin rubbed his thigh again, then let out a weary sigh. He was starting to get dark circles under his eyes. I looked away and shook myself. I'd have to straighten out my ruff later.

“Sorry,” I said. “Couldn't help myself. I realized something important.”

“Better be good.”

I explained about the blank look on Albert and the guys at Pulsar. Devin leaned forward, elbows on his knees.

“Leon, I hate to break it to you, but that kind of zone-out happens to humans a lot. Haven't you ever seen it on some shmoe sitting and watching the feeds?”

I shook my head. “This is different, Dev. It's more … intense, somehow.”

There was a quiet knock on the door, then it slid open. Chief Wright poked his head in, looking a bit anxious.

“Everything all right?”

He addressed Devin, but he was looking at me. I shot Devin a look, then sat down and licked the back of my paw.

“Yeah,” Devin said. “Come on in, Chief.”

He stepped in and closed the door. “I just wanted to be sure there wasn't a misunderstanding,” the chief said, shooting me another nervous glance.

He had reason to be anxious. I was unique on the team, and I hadn't come cheap.

“It's OK,” I told him. “I just needed to get Devin's attention, was all.” Before Devin could butt in, I explained my theory to the chief.

“I guess it's possible,” he said doubtfully.

He didn't believe me either. I was frustrated. There had to be a way to convince them. I looked around for inspiration. One of the guys had left his holopad on, displaying the alert for Skanecutter, the second missing person. He'd looked familiar when I first saw the alert. I went over to get a better look.

“Chief, I've got news for you,” I said, staring at the guy's smiling image as it slowly rotated.

“What?” said the chief, stepping closer.

“Mr. Skanecutter here? I saw him earlier tonight. In Pulsar.”

“We questioned the staff at Pulsar,” Devin said. “They hadn't seen him.”

“Have you seen the crowds in there for that show?” I said. “The place is a zoo. Easy to miss one guy in that mob.”

“When's the Firefly's next show?” the chief demanded.

“Oh-four-hundred,” said Devin. I could practically hear his shoulders sag.

“Right,” said the chief. “We'll stake it out. Report back here at oh-three-thirty.”

He headed for the door, but paused before opening it and looked back at me. “Thanks for your help, Leon.”

He flashed a half-smile and went out. I looked at Devin, who was slumped in his chair again, staring at the holo.

“Cheer up,” I said. “We've got time for a snack and a nap.”

For the snack, Devin headed for the rotunda. I silently cheered as I followed him to Ling-Ling's.

Ling2 was there, which was slightly unusual. Normally she came to work toward the end of third shift and worked through first, taking second shift off for her personal time. Lately she was spending more and more time over at the Imperial Gardens, which she'd inherited, learning the ropes from the staff there.

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