Phoenix Fallen (20 page)

Miles picked up one of the vials and held it for a minute, his eyes narrowing. “Interesting. Feel.”

He held it out to Jules.

The syringe was far heavier than it should've been for its size, and too warm, almost hot to the touch. It also gave Jules the weirdest sensation; a combination of a tingling electricity, with an unpleasant bug-like crawl that climbed up his arm from where it touched him. He handed it back to Miles, repressing a shudder. The French vamp stared at it for a moment, then set it down and started rolling up one of his shirt cuffs.

“Sweetheart, what
are
you doing?” Kelsey sounded irritated…and resigned.

Miles flashed her a grin and picked up the syringe. “Research.”

She sighed and folded her arms.

Jules watched the French vamp palm the syringe. Was Miles crazy? Apparently so. Miles only lifted his eyes to Jules for one moment before sliding the needle under his skin and pressing the plunger just a barest fraction. He withdrew the needle and tossed it back into the bucket

It didn’t take long. An ozone tang spread through the already stuffy room. Whatever the nasty stuff in the syringe was, it appeared to be trying to burn Miles from the inside out. Just like Rissa had said.

Miles stood there, his arm smoking, his blue eyes cool. The only difference Rissa noted was a slight tension in his jaw.

She leaned into Kelsey, still feeling absurdly weak. “Your man is a little scary.”

Kelsey smiled, her gaze never leaving the blond vampire, as she wrapped a comforting arm around Rissa.

‘Yes. Yes, he is.” There was no mistaking the pride and love in her voice. Not to mention the frustration.

“So?” Jules’ voice held nothing but clipped impatience.

Miles shrugged. “See for yourself.” Not only Jules but all of leaned closer. The smooth golden skin on Miles’ forearm bubbled obscenely in an area the size of a dime, as if he’d injected himself with acid. Minutes passed. Slowly the reaction died down, then fizzled out altogether. A pale pink mark emerged, shiny against the darker, healthy skin, like a burn. Miles took a breath, then dropped his arm, rolling his sleeve back down and buttoning his cuff as if nothing untoward had happened.

Jules raised his eyebrows, the question clear in his eyes.

“It was fairly unpleasant, yes,” Miles said. “But I doubt it will do any lasting harm.”

“To you. What about the rest of us?”

Miles’ lips thinned as he flicked a glance at Kelsey. “I am not certain. I don’t recall ever seeing lead, if indeed it
is
merely lead—which I highly doubt—used in this manner before. It is curious.”

“And fucking scary.” Jules snorted.

“That, too. I think we should keep this quiet and run some tests.”

“No shit, Sherlock.”

"I wonder where it came from?"

Rissa spoke up, her voice shaky. “Daimen knows.”

“Yes, he does. Yet another reason for us to find him quickly.” The quiet flash of electric blue in Miles’ eyes made chills blossom in Rissa’s quaking tummy.

Just then Scott burst into the trailer, his hair wild, his white T-shirt streaked with blood and grass stains. “The fucker got away.”

Miles sighed. Jules exploded. He went after Scott with both hands until Miles was forced to step between them. Then Jules whirled and planted one big fist through the trailer wall, ripping through it like it was paper. The trailer rocked with the impact.

Rissa didn’t stick around for the rest of the yelling. She slipped from the bed. Kelsey gave her a worried look, but her eyes went back to the men and Rissa went through the half-open door, so exhausted every step was an effort.

The air was soft and warm outside. It was smelled green and lovely after the stench of the trailer. She looked out into the trees. Daimen was out there. Chills cascaded down her spine, and tears burned at the corner of her eyes. So close.

Too close.

Another few minutes and he would have started torturing her. Using the pain as he'd threatened. He would have used whatever was in those vials on her just like he'd said. Killing that vamp so fast had just been for show. To let her contemplate what he could do, to make her fear rise until it choked her.

She had no doubt that with her, Daimen had planned to take it slow. Bit by bit. Waiting until she weakened and he could slip inside, take her over and force her to give into him again.

She leaned into the wall of the trailer, head back, staring up at the stars sprinkled across the silken drapes of the sky.
I can't survive that again.
I can't survive
him
again.
I just
can't.

Rissa had never thought of herself as strong. Stubborn, that's what she was. Too goddamn mule-headed to give up or die. The things Daimen had done to her, the mind-control, the mental slavery, and yes, the fucking
rape
. All of that, over and over again.

Those had been awful things. Terrible memories that still occasionally gave her the most vile nightmares.

But she had truly believed it was
over
. Yes, she had practiced the mind control, but it was like whistling past a graveyard. She hadn't really thought he'd return and want her again.

Rissa had left that life behind and she'd absolutely refused to allow that son of a bitch to ruin what remained of her undead life. She'd buried him and his fucked-up world so deep sometimes it felt like that part of her past was only a bad dream, or a horror movie she'd watched once long, long ago. Half-remembered and hazy.

In the last few days though, it had started to come to the surface again, bright and clear. And now…

Now she needed a shower, a boiling hot shower. And maybe a bath, too, to wash away his touch. To wash away the memories.

Who was she kidding?
She couldn't wash Daimen away.

Like Jules said, he was inside her.

Forever.

Trembling, Rissa slid down the side of the trailer.  Her head fell to her knees and the tears started to fall.

Just then the trailer door banged open. Jules burst out and then stopped in mid-stride. He was still shaking with frustration and rage, his knuckles bleeding where he’d hit the trailer wall, his eyes black and snapping. Their eyes locked. Something inside him seemed to crumple as he looked at her. The fury drained from him. His shoulders bowed. Rissa lifted her chin for a second, but the effort was too much. Her head dropped to her knees again. She wrapped her arms around her legs and gave into the sobs there in the grass and the dirt.

Warm, strong arms surrounded her, shocking her silent. Lifting her off the ground. Big hands stroking her hair, murmuring over and over in that deep, soothing rumble. She couldn't make out the words, but she didn't care. Rissa buried her face in his neck. The smell of him surrounded her, clean and smoky and dark.

Jules squeezed her once so hard it took her breath away. She thought she felt his lips brush her hair and then …he was gone.

The abruptness of his departure stunned her and she swayed a little. Staring after his retreating back as a cold hopelessness settled into her belly. Then Kelsey was there, her arm going around Rissa’s waist as her legs went weak.

“He's tore up, Rissa. You know that. Give him some time. I thought he was going to lose his shit when he called us. Jules is not in the habit of losing his shit.”

“Except with me.”

“Yeah. You do seem to be the exception to the rule.”

“Lucky me.”

“I’d say so.” Kelsey’s mouth curved but her words were dead serious.

Rissa gave a laugh that was more than half sob. “Come on, Kelsey. He’s never going to forgive me for what Daimen did to his family.”

Kelsey wrapped Rissa in her own hug, albeit a much softer and gentler one than Jules’ had been. “Oh Rissa,” she whispered, "have a little faith. He’ll punish himself, because it’s what he does. What he has to do. But in the end, Jules won’t be able to let you go. He’s too far gone on you to stop now. 'Mr. Destiny', remember?”

Rissa gave a watery smile when Kelsey released her, but all she could hear in her head were Jules’ words that last time, in her hotel room. The utter finality in them.

Every time I look at you, I’m gonna see him. There’s no coming back from that.

Not ever.

Kelsey watched as Scott and Mags came outside and helped Rissa back to the car. Her lips pressed into a tight line. Miles emerged from the trailer at last, carrying the bucket with the syringes. She glared at him, still pissed at the risk he had taken in the trailer.

"You have blood on your shirt.”

His mouth twitched once, then his expression went very bland. “Are you suggesting I am getting sloppy? There were three of them, Kels Bells.”

Kelsey sighed, and laced her arm with his. “Stop whining. Let’s get out of here." Jules was leaning against the driver's side door as they approached, his back to everyone as Mags held Rissa while Scott opened the door for them. Kelsey made a disgusted sound that had Miles sighing and pulling her to a stop.

"Kels Bells."

"What?" She snapped.

He set down the bucket and took her chin in one hand.

"Are you so very happy now that you have forgotten what pain tastes like,
mon coeur?"
His voice was gentle, his summer blue eyes soft as a June breeze. Those eyes went straight to her heart as she thought of where they had been less than two months ago.

"No, of course not," Kelsey whispered, her eyes filling. "But watching this… Miles, it's ridiculous. They are both hurting so much."

"
Oui.
But remember, people must find their own path out of the darkness." His lips brushed hers and she closed her eyes, breathing him in. Their foreheads rested together for an instant before Miles pulled away, picking up the bucket and heading to the car.

Kesley sighed as she watched him go, his lithe, elegant figure cutting through the night. Miles was a smart man and she loved him very much, but her gaze found Jules and her jaw tightened again.

Yes, people did need to find their own way…but a well-timed kick in the ass never hurt anyone. At least figuratively.

They dropped Scott at home first, then Mags. Rissa was harder. Kelsey wanted her to come back and stay in the business suite at Phoenix with her and Miles, but Rissa refused. Politely, but very firmly.

"But you can't be alone, Rissa." Kels was insistent. "Not after that."

"No," Rissa agreed with a shudder. Kelsey saw Jules make an involuntary motion, as if he was going to say something. The moment passed. Jules kept his eyes rigidly on the taillights in front of him. "Take me to Crave. I'll have company there and they have a room I can use. I'm used to getting by on my own, never fear."

Jules' fingers wrapped so tightly around the steering wheel at Rissa's words, Kelsey was surprised it didn't come apart in his hands.

Kelsey's heart broke a little as she looked from him to Rissa’s brittle smile. If she pushed Rissa right now, Kelsey knew she would break down entirely. Best to let her go her way, at least for tonight. She'd damn well be checking back on her after sundown though.

She nodded, and then Miles spoke up. "I have people looking for Cross. Right this minute. As soon as I hear anything, you will know."

Rissa gave him a grateful look as Jules whipped the car into Crave's parking lot. Kelsey walked her into the club and returned within five minutes.

Rissa had not wanted Kelsey to linger, that much had been obvious. She was obviously seconds away from losing it. Kelsey wouldn't have left her alone, no matter what, but there had been another woman inside. A tall blond that had wrapped her arms around Rissa in a way that satisfied Kelsey her new friend would be cared for.

She stomped out to the car and threw herself into the backseat. Her eyes met Jules’ in the rearview and he looked away. When they got back to Phoenix a half hour later, Jules got out with them, leaving the car running.

"Do you think he'll come back?" He put his hands in his pocket, looking up at the high triangle of Phoenix's atrium, glittering in the security floodlights.

Miles shrugged. "What do you think?"

Jules shook his head. "I don't know. He's already proven he's capable of waiting years, decades even. Going to ground would be the smart thing to do now. Particularly since he knows you're involved."

"Donc, il serait,"
Miles agreed.

"But I hope he doesn't. I want an end to that bastard, Miles."

"And so we will do our best to shake down all his hidey-holes.  I can do that, Jules. I can do my very best, but Cross has resources that should he choose to make use of them…." Miles shook his head.

"Are you saying it can't be done?"

"
Non.
I am saying you may need to be patient."

"Fuck." But Jules nodded. "Whatever it takes. You need to let me help, too, Miles. No more of your 'qualifying'."

The Frenchman raised an imperious eyebrow.
"Mais bien sûr."
He held out his hand to Kelsey, but she only shook her head.

"I need a moment with Jules, sweetheart. I'll be in in a minute."

Miles sighed.
"Vous êtes la femme la plus obstinée, mon amour."

"Oui,"
she bit out, without looking at him. "And you wouldn't want me any other way."

"N’importe quoi."
But he vanished inside, leaving her and Jules alone. The night whispered around them, but the silence shouted.

"Just leave it, Kelsey." Jules' voice finally sliced through the tension.

“That all you got to say, J? That bastard was going to torture her, rape her….maybe even kill her! Don’t tell me that doesn’t get to you. You care about her—“

“I fucking love her!” Jules whirled and roared it at her, his dark eyes glowing amber in the dark. His voice bounced off the wall of glass behind them like a gunshot, stinging her ears.

Kelsey actually took a step back before she reminded herself who this was.
Her best friend.
A man she had held in her arms when he had been no more than a gangly boy, shaking with the horror of his nightmares. She had worked, laughed and gone through murder and destruction with this man.

Next to Miles, Jules held more of her heart that anyone on the planet. Jules wasn’t dangerous, not to her, only to himself.

"If that’s true, then why are you pushing her away, Jules?" Her voice was soft.

"What choice do I have?"

The agony in his face made her ache. She had seen that same look on Miles' face, Kelsey realized, not so long ago. On almost this very same spot. Tears caught in her throat. "Oh, sweetheart, the choice is yours. It's always yours. Wallow in the pain, or take a chance and let it go."

"I can't." The words weren't harsh, they were flat and toneless. "I don't even know where to begin. Rissa came from him, Kelsey. I can't…. I just can't."

"Then that's your choice, too," she said sadly. "I know you, Jules. I know how your mind works and what your family meant to you. And I know damn well why you're doing this." His head came up, his dark eyes now blacker than the night surrounding them. "You've had all this guilt for years that you survived and they didn't. You've never shaken that. So now you've convinced yourself that being with Rissa is somehow breaking their trust. Betraying them.”

Shuddering, Jules turned away from her, but said nothing.

“But that's not true, Jules. This is
wrong."
Kelsey folded her arms. "Your heart is telling you to go to Rissa, to help her. I saw that, so don't bullshit me. You couldn’t help but comfort her and you wanted to stay with her. You
know
you did."

He just stared out into the grounds. "It wouldn't be right, Kelsey."

"Being true to yourself is always the right thing to do."

Jules gave a half-laugh of such bitter frustration Kelsey winced. "Is it? Even if you're a monster?"

"You're not a monster, Jules. And neither is Rissa. Daimen is the monster and he's the one you should be fighting, not your own damn heart."

"I'm not so sure having a fucking heart is a good idea for a vampire." His voice was cold, but to her ears he just sounded lost. Goddamnit, Miles was right once again. Jules would have to find his own way out of this.

Kelsey sighed and moved toward the doors. But she hesitated at the last second. Her hand went to his arm.

"You've never been a quitter, Jules. Don't start now for godsakes." Jules looked at her then, pressing his lips together, his expression unfathomable. Kelsey squeezed him once and let go.

By the time she reached the doors, the car was a quiet rumble behind her, fading into the night.