Playboy Pilot (27 page)

We spent the rest of the afternoon making love in my bed with a slow intensity that hadn’t existed before our talk. With my offer and admission of love, our relationship had just moved to another level, and I had to trust that her being away from me wouldn’t change anything between us.

As much as I was ready to dive head first into everything with her, there was still a small part of me that worried that today could be the last time I saw her. Crazy, right? After everything we’d been through. Maybe that was the part of me that still felt like I didn’t deserve to love this intensely when Lucy couldn’t.

The sun had almost completely set as we drove to the airport. Kendall wouldn’t let go of my hand. It felt so strange not taking her with me to Venezuela. It was as if I couldn’t remember what it was like to fly without her.

When we arrived at Miami International, I parked in the spot that the airline reserved for me. Neither one of us moved to exit the SUV as we just stared at each other until I finally cupped her cheek and pulled her into a passionate kiss.

“Perky, please don’t forget this, how right this feels.”

“I won’t. I couldn’t ever forget it, Carter.”

Her flight was two hours after mine, so she’d have to leave me at the gate for my airline and linger around the airport until it was time to head to her flight on a different airline.

One of the stewardesses, Renee, passed by us. “Good to see you’re back on, Trip.” She then winked at me.

I knew
exactly
what Kendall was thinking, and she was right. That flight attendant had been just another notch on my belt some time ago. It sickened me, especially now that I knew what it felt like to have meaningful sex with someone. I looked at Kendall and wanted to scream,
“Stop looking at her. She doesn’t matter!
” We just didn’t need this right now. It only added to the stress of our separating.

After a quiet few minutes of silence, I pulled her into a hug and whispered in her ear, “I have to go.”

Her tears moistened my pilot’s shirt as she said, “This feels surreal.”

“I know, but it’s only temporary. We’ll be back together again soon.”

She sniffled. “Okay.”

Lifting her chin to meet my eyes, I said, “P.S. I love you.”

She could tell from my expression that there was more to that sentiment than just me stating the obvious.

“A Beatles song?”

“Yes. But that one
really
matches this life moment, probably more than any of them.”

“I love you, Carter.”

“I love you, Perky. Promise me we’ll talk on the phone and figure out when we’ll be back together next.”

“I promise.”

“I’m gonna be thinking about you the whole flight. You know that, right?”

She playfully grabbed my collar. “You’d better be.”

“I’ll miss you.”

“Sing a song for me, Captain.”

“You can guarantee that.” I hugged her one last time, squeezing her tightly. “Fuck. I can’t let go.”

She pushed back and wiped her eyes before waving me away. “Go. You’ll be late.”

I started on my way through security. When I turned around, she was still standing in the same spot watching me. I blew her a kiss before continuing down the hall. Right before I was about to turn the corner, I turned back one last time, but she was gone.

When the jet hit cruising altitude that night, I saw something I’d never seen while flying before: a shooting star. I took it as a sign that things were going to work out.

Don’t let me down, Perky.

I picked up the intercom.

“Good evening, Ladies and Gentleman. This is your Supreme Commander, otherwise known as Captain Clynes. I’d like to take a moment to welcome you onto this beautiful Boeing 757. Our flying time from Miami to Caracas is approximately three hours and thirty minutes. We anticipate a smooth ride with little to no bumps. So, sit back and relax. Again, welcome aboard International Airlines Flight 553 to Caracas, Venezuela. As I often like to do to welcome my passengers aboard, here’s a little rendition of a Beatles song that’s fitting for tonight—fitting because I’ve entrusted my heart to someone whom I left back at the airport. She’s taking it with her to Texas. I’m sure some of you can relate to this feeling. So, the song for tonight is called,
Don’t Let Me Down.
”

MY MOTHER REEKED
of alcohol as she spoke into my face, “You can’t be serious!”

I’d made the mistake of filling her in on my trip to prepare her for the possibility that nothing would be going according to plan anymore. My mother had always strongly encouraged me to go ahead with the insemination in Germany, mostly for her own selfish reasons.

“I normally wouldn’t be telling you any of this, especially not when you’re half-drunk, but given the circumstances, you need to know where my head is at and that the Germany plans may not happen.”

“And what are those poor guys supposed to do now that you’ve changed your mind?”

“I haven’t closed the door one hundred percent, but I never promised them anything. I haven’t even met them in person, and I’m not the last woman on Earth with a womb. They would find another way.”

“Yeah, well, you’re gonna lose them as an option if you keep stringing them along.”

“Do you think I don’t know that? I spoke to them this morning and told them I would let them know my decision no later than next week.”

“You’re gonna end up with no one, and we’re gonna end up destitute!”

My blood was boiling. “Is that all you care about?”

My mother pointed her finger at me. “I shouldn’t have to worry about what I’m entitled to. Your whacky grandfather put us in this position—not me.”

“Stop being so selfish. We are talking about human life here.”

“No, we
were
talking about human life—you giving the gift of human life to a nice couple in need and getting us
set
for life. Now, we’re talking about some ridiculous love child scenario that is destined to end badly.”

“And exactly how do you know that?”

“Kendall, will you look at yourself for a moment? Think about how crazy this sounds from the outside looking in. You go on a trip, fall for the pilot of your goddamn plane…who now wants to father your child? Oh, and I’m sure it has nothing to do with the fact that you just told him you’re about to inherit millions of dollars! Sweetheart, wake up!”

“Carter is not after the money!” I screamed, startling the horses outside.

“Well, that’s what you want to believe, and quite frankly, I would’ve thought you to be smarter than that.” She stumbled back into her seat then said, “You have been planning a meticulous strategy for months with these nice men overseas. If you went along with the original plan, you wouldn’t have to worry about raising a baby that you don’t want. It would be in a good home. We would be set for life. Everybody would win. And yet…you’re considering doing the total opposite of everything we talked about just because some pilot stuck his face between your legs.”

“You are so vile.”

“Vile, maybe, but I speak the truth.”

“Well, I’m not so sure I want any of this anymore. I might just walk away from the ranch and the money for good. Maybe you’ll never see me again.”

“Don’t talk like that, Kendall. You wouldn’t do that to yourself.”

“I’m serious. This inheritance bullshit has caused me nothing but stress from the moment I found out about it. Don’t act like you really give a shit about me, Mom. You don’t see anything but dollar signs when you look at me now. It’s pathetic. I’m your daughter, not your meal ticket.”

“I’m only trying to help you get what’s rightfully yours.”

“So, I suppose you wouldn’t mind if I had a legal document written up saying you’re not entitled to any of it?”

Dead silence.

I nodded slowly. “That’s what I thought.”

Unable to handle any more of this conversation, I stormed out of the house and drove toward the city. Wiping tears from my eyes, I blasted the music to drown out the thoughts in my head.

When I finally stopped the car, I realized I really needed Carter. I immediately dialed him. Thank God he picked up.

His voice was low and sexy. “How did you know I was thinking about you?”

“Carter…”

He could tell that I’d been crying. “What’s wrong, baby?”

“I should’ve never come home.”

“Why are you upset?”

“My mother. She’s saying things to try to brainwash me.”

“Things like what?”

“She thinks I’m crazy for considering your offer. She thinks you’re only after the money.”

There was a long moment of silence before he spoke. The anger in his voice was penetrating. “I can’t even begin to tell you how irate that makes me. First of all, I wish this money situation never existed. Second of all, I’ll sign whatever is needed to prove I have no interest in that money. To be honest, the money part sickens me a little. I just want a life with you, Kendall. I’ll sign any dotted line to get that.” His voice cracked, “Just tell me where to fucking sign, Perky.”

I let out a long breath into the phone. “Just talking to you makes me feel better. I miss you so much.”

“You want me to come there? I’ll tell the airline it’s a family emergency.”

“I don’t want you to lie to get out of work.”

“I wouldn’t be lying. You
are
family to me now, the most important thing in my life.”

That made my heart melt.

“Thank you for offering, but I think I still need a little more time alone.”

“Okay, but if you start to feel like you need me, just tell me. I’ll be there in a matter of hours.”

“Thank you. That makes me feel better to know that you would do that for me.”

“I’d do anything for you, Perky. Anything.”

“Oh, I know. Even knock me up.”

“No, that would be for
us.
The more time that goes by, the more I want it. And I sure as hell am looking forward to working on it. God, that’s gonna be so much fun.”

When I laughed, he said, “Is that a smile I hear?”

“Can you even
hear
a smile?” I giggled.

“We’ll get through this together. I promise. And in case you didn’t hear me back in Florida, I’ll say it again. I love you. And if we have this baby together, nothing will matter more to me. I would never turn my back on my child.”

“Okay…I hear you.”

“Maybe give yourself a break from thinking about it for a couple of days. Sometimes, when you’re trying hard to figure things out, overthinking it makes you more confused. You need to stay away from your mother, go some place quiet and relax. The answer will come.”

Carter was right. I needed away from the ranch.

“I think that’s a good suggestion.”

“Guess where I am?” he asked.

“Where?”

“On the beach in Caracas. Missing the hell out of you and drinking our drink.”

“What’s
our
drink?”

“You don’t remember?”