Playing in SECRET (Corrigan & Co. Book 9) (22 page)

“Wow.”

“I know. You get used
to it,” Audrey tells me.

“Jeanne,” Scott
yells, “welcome to barbeque night.”

“Why isn’t he
welcoming us?” I ask, grumbling a little.

“Because we are not a
teenage girl who might feel intimidated by all of them at once.”

“You have to be
sensible, don’t you?”

“About this, yes.”

Maggie wipes her hands
on her jeans before coming over to envelope Audrey in a hug. “I’m
so glad you could make it tonight. We’ve missed you.”

“I don’t come every
week.”

“No, but you used to
come more. Before…”

Me? Does she mean
before me? “I didn’t know I was keeping you from your friends,
Dree.”

“Oh, you’re not.
She didn’t mean you. Maggie and I have had some rough times lately,
but we’re working on it.”

“Yes, we are. And you
and your daughter are welcome to come here with Audrey whenever you’d
like, Blake. Despite what it looks like, the boys actually leave some
food for others.”

“I’m not sure
Jeanne should be around Scott so much. No offense, but I don’t like
the way she is around him. Following him around like he walks on
water.”

“You see him now, but
I can tell you that when he was Jeanne’s age, not many girls were
taking notice of him. Unless it was to tease him about being a nerd
who didn’t care about dressing in the ‘right’ clothes.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really,”
Audrey answers. “I met Scott when he was just about to start
college, and he was a skinny boy with big glasses. He didn’t come
into his own until he’d been in college for a little while. Then,
every girl on campus wanted him. It was funny to watch him as he
tried to navigate all of that.”

“By ‘navigate’
she means that my son slept his way through every girl at his
school.”

“Except for Ainsley,”
Audrey says.

“Yes, well, Ainsley
wasn’t like the rest. She had a crush on him, sure, but he cared
too much for her as a friend to use her.”

“Wasn’t that weird?
Him working so closely with her when she had a crush on him?” I
ask, still utterly confused by the idea of the tattooed guy in front
of me being a nerd who was picked on.

“No, it wasn’t,”
Scott’s wife, Yasmin, says, coming up to our little group. “Their
friendship has always come first to both of them. When Ainsley
started dating Zack, Scott had a talk with her where he told her he
always thought she was amazing, and that meant a lot to her. They’re
closer than ever now.”

“And you’re not
bothered by that, even a little bit?”

“Not even a little
bit. My husband never stops showing me how much he loves me—and
wants me. He will give Jeanne attention, because he genuinely likes
her, and he knows what it’s like to
be
her, but he won’t encourage her in any romantic way. It will always
be as a friend, and he’s made sure she knows that. She actually
spent more time with me than with him when she stayed over with us.
We talked about books we love, and a little bit about you and Audrey,
too.”

“Thank you. I’m not
used to having an almost teenage daughter yet. Seeing her with a
crush is scary. The boy she liked in San Diego disappointed her, and
that nearly broke my heart, right along with hers.”

“It doesn’t get any
easier,” Maggie tells me. “You always worry about your children,
and grandchildren, it’s your job. You
do
learn to step back and let them fall if they need to, making sure
you’re there to help them clean up the scrapes once they pick
themselves up again.”

“I may be calling you
for help.”

“Any time, Blake.”

Once Gary brings over
the burgers and steaks, we all load our plates and sit at the long
picnic table that must have been custom built because it fits all of
the adults. The little kids sit at a smaller version of the table,
but Jeanne’s sitting with us. I think her loyalty is shifting,
though. It’s Luke Griffin that she seems to be swooning over now as
he talks to her about what it’s like to be an elementary school
teacher. His wife, Olivia, winks at me, and I manage to smile back at
her, despite the fact that I want to now lock Jeanne in some random
tower until she’s an adult.

Olivia’s sister,
Rose, is here visiting the Griffins, and she tries to engage Jeanne
in conversation about school, but it’s no use. Luke is the only one
she’s paying attention to, and I’m Googling castles for sale in
between bites of my burger. Rose goes to MIT and is another woman who
breaks the myth of beauty not mixing with brains. She’s absolutely
gorgeous, and pretty sassy, too. She also doesn’t mince words.
“Aud, I thought you were with Ares Dixon.”

“No, Ares is just a
good friend.”

“He’s a pig. Why
would you want to be friends with him?”

Audrey puts down her
fork, and tilts her head as she looks at Rose. “Have you met him?”

“Yeah. I went to a
race, and he caught me looking at his car.”

“His car?”

“I kind of have an
obsession with cars, and engines, and stuff,” she says with a
shrug. “Of course, that was unfathomable to Ares. He thought I was
a pit bunny, just there for a good time to roll around the floor of
the garage.”

“Are you fucking
kidding me? Did he hurt you, Rose?” Luke asks, and from the look on
his face, I think Ares had better watch his back. Team Luke seems
like a pretty awesome place to be at the moment.

“No, I am not
kidding. Chicks do that. You know that from playing hockey, plus all
the moms who go full-on Cougar when they see you at the school. I
don’t begrudge those women their fun—they know what they’re
getting, and if that’s what they want, I say go for it—but I’m
not sleeping with some oversexed driver who thinks he’s God’s
gift. And no, he didn’t hurt me. I kneed him in the balls and
walked away while he cried out for help.”

Maggie and Audrey share
a look, and I can’t tell what it means. No one else seems to
notice, so I let it go. Whatever they have going on is something I’ll
probably never know about. I’ve already accepted that I’ll never
be privy to all the super spy secrets, and vowed to not obsess over
it, because that would just make me crazy, and I still wouldn’t be
told anything I’m not supposed to know anyway.

“Who’s ready for
some cake?” Maggie asks, standing up, and effectively changing the
subject.

The other Griffin women
go inside with her. When they return, the rest of the Society girls
and their guys, along with their mentors and a reluctant looking
Kendrick, are with them. They have a big cake with baby stuff all
over it, and I can’t help but smile. Audrey is so loved by
everyone, me included, and I know that them doing this for her will
mean a lot to her. When she turns her face to sob into my shirt, I
pull her close, and chuckle into her hair.

“Aud?” Reina asks,
her eyes going wide.

“It’s the hormones.
I think,” I tell her.

“Oh okay. Well, we
just wanted to say how happy we are for you—both of you. We’ll
have a shower for you later, but we wanted to celebrate with you now,
too.”

“Thank you,” Audrey
says, turning to smile at all of them. “And Kenny, you came to
celebrate with us, too. That’s awesome.”

“Yes, well I was
coerced.”

“Just admit it, Doc.
You were hoping to see me naked again,” I say, making everyone but
him laugh.

“You,” he sputters.
“I thought you would be normal. But no, I guess it’s too much to
expect for any of you to act appropriately.”

“Tell us more about
Blake being naked,” Candi says, her eyes sparkling as Owen glares
at me.

“Audrey and I were
celebrating the baby in our own way, but Kendrick interrupted us.”

“You were in my
hospital wing. The door was not locked, and you…this is just…dear
God why did I not stay in emergency medicine?”

“Because I pay you
much better than you’d ever make there, and you get to make a
difference in many lives with the public work we do. Live sex shows
are just a bonus,” Reina tells him with a straight face.

“Mrs. Corrigan,”
Kendrick says, turning to Jane Corrigan, who is trying to hide her
smile behind her cocktail, “is there no chance of you returning to
the helm?”

“No, Kendrick, and
even if I had to for some reason, you would be seeing and doing the
same things. If you’re really unhappy, you are free to leave. No
one is forced to stay with us.”

“I do not wish to
leave. I just wish to see less sexual encounters in my patient
rooms.”

“We’ll try to
behave,” Ellie tells him.

“You two are the
worst! You get hurt the most often, and misbehave even more.”

“We know. I’ll keep
it in my pants until we’re out of the hospital wing. Promise,”
Aiden tells him.

“Thank you.”

“Can I have my cake
now? It looks yummy. You got it from Drago Sisters, right?” Audrey
asks.

“Like we would go
somewhere else. And yes, let’s eat,” Maggie tells her.

I lean over to Audrey,
and whisper in her ear, because I can’t pass up the chance to tease
her. “Did you just really say ‘yummy?’”

“I did. Now shut up
and feed me some cake before I eat your piece, too.”

“Yes, boss.”

“Not boss. Partner.
We’re partners.”

“That we are.”

Audrey

It’s opening night
for the play, which means it’s also the last night we have together
before Blake leaves on his press tour. He was supposed to have a week
off in between, but they needed him early, and he has to go. The past
several weeks have been like a dream, one where I get to wake up with
the man I love, and go to bed with him again every night. But they’ve
also been a little rough.

I’ve tried really
hard to get past our
past
,
but I know he feels me holding back. In fact, we had a huge fight
about it last night. I close my eyes and think about the things he
said to me.

“
I
love you so much, Audrey. I can’t keep going like this, though. I
don’t know what more I can do to prove that I’ve changed. That
I’m not going to let you down again. I want to move forward with
you. I’m not expecting you to forget our past, but you have to get
past it if we’re going to have a future. Can you do that?”

I couldn’t answer
him, and so he left. He walked out and went to sleep in Aiden’s old
place. I wasn’t even sure he’d want me to go tonight, but then he
texted me this morning, telling me he loved me and would spend the
rest of his life proving that to me. I feel like a royal bitch, and I
really need to talk to someone, but I’m too embarrassed to tell
anyone, focusing instead on getting ready for tonight.

I’ve just started to
show, but only when I wear tight clothes, so Stella brought over some
looser dresses, and I’m trying to decide on which on to go with. I
didn’t want a big group dress-up party tonight, because between the
fight and Blake leaving, I’m feeling moody and hormonal, so I told
everyone to stay away. It’ll be hard to put on a brave face later,
so I just need some time to cry a little by myself right now.

My doorbell rings, and
I go down in my robe to answer it. I’m not really surprised to see
Tegan standing there, already dressed and ready to go. “It took you
long enough,” I tell her as I open the door to let her in.

“I wanted to see how
you reacted to Caleb’s talk before I came and talked to you myself.
I thought I might not have to.”

“But now you think
you do.”

“Yes.”

“Okay. You can help
me decide on a dress while we talk,” I tell her, leading her up the
stairs.

“Stella says it has
to be the white sheath with the black sheer embellished overlay that
looks kind of like a storm is happening.”

“How dangerous would
it be if I choose a different one?”

“You know she’s
right.”

“Of course she’s
right. I was already leaning towards that one. It’s just
frustrating that she knows my body better than I do.”

“It’s all the
anatomy classes she took in fashion school.”

“Probably, but it’s
still freaky.”

“It is,” she
agrees.

I slip on the dress,
and then sit in front of my vanity to do my hair and makeup. “Go
ahead and say what you need to.”

“You know my story,
and what I went through. I mean, hell, since the videos of me at the
carnival went viral, pretty much the whole world knows.”

“True. But it’s a
good story for the young women of the world to hear.”

“It is. I don’t
love that I lived it, because it was fucking hard, but once I
realized that I could help others with my story, I was able to look
past the pain, and find the good in my life right now.”

“I’m trying to get
over my past.”

“But you haven’t
yet. I see it in your eyes when you look at Blake. You’re holding
back part of yourself from him.”

It’s time for me to
finally admit it to someone, and she’s the best person for the job.
“There’s this little voice that just keeps telling me I’m not
good enough, and that I’m going to be waiting for him again while
he’s off laughing at me. I know it’s not logical, but it’s
there. And I’m scared.”

“That man hangs on
your every word, and looks at you like you’re a present he’s
waited his whole life to unwrap. He’s not going to leave you again,
and I know he’ll do his damnedest to not ever let you down. He will
let you down sometimes, and you’ll do the same to him. It’s
life—no one behaves the way we want them to, all of the time.
You’ve got to let go of the past, and give yourself to the present,
and the future, if there’s ever going to be a chance for the two of
you.”

“I know. I want to,
and he wants me to. We fought about it last night, and he slept
downstairs. I just don’t know how to do it. How to forget.”