Playing with Matches (16 page)

28

JETHRO GOES TO THE CITY

I
slapped on a little of Dad’s aftershave and regarded myself in the mirror. Not too shabby. Not too shabby at all. In half an hour I’d be picking up Amy for the party. Picking up the hottest girl in school for the party!

I was ready. New sneakers. Clean jeans. One of my few shirts without a funny saying on it. I had money in my wallet, gas in my tank, and breath mints in reserve. After a second’s hesitation, I slipped the battered pack of condoms into my pocket as well. I was prepared.

“My, don’t we look handsome?” said my mother with a smile as I exited the bathroom. I reddened under her gaze. Here I was, seventeen years old, and she still could make me feel like I was three.

“I’ll be back late tonight,” I told her.

“No later than midnight,” she cautioned. “Is Melody coming here, or are you picking her up?”

I guessed I couldn’t put off telling her. “I’m not going with Melody. I’m going with Amy Green. You haven’t met her.”

Mom stopped smiling. She seemed to realize finally what had happened at the dance.

“What about Melody?”

“We broke up. Mutual thing.”
Liar, liar!

Mom opened her mouth, then closed it. “Okay. Well. Have a good time, no drinking. Call us if you need a ride.” Mom said that every time I drove anywhere. I wasn’t sure if she meant I should call them if I was too drunk to drive or simply if my car broke down on me.

The car. As I stepped outside, I looked at the gray monster. I’d always loved the heap; it was perfect for taking five or ten of my closest friends for a ride. But now that I was taking Amy out, I wished I drove something a little nicer. I mean, the dents gave it character, and the
HANG UP AND DRIVE
!
bumper sticker was cute, but it wasn’t really classy enough for a girl like Amy.

I sort of regretted agreeing to drive Johnny and his date. I wanted to have some moments alone with Amy, and Johnny wasn’t the type of guy who enhanced a romantic atmosphere.

I blared my horn when I pulled up in front of his house. He strutted out a few seconds later, dressed in imitation designer clothes. On another guy, that might have worked. Johnny, however, looked like a farmer on his way to church. Jessica held his hand.

Johnny threw open the back door and hopped in. Jessica, obviously irritated that he didn’t hold the door for her, climbed in behind him. I glanced at her in the rearview mirror. She was skinny and redheaded. Pretty, yes, but kind of gangly and awkward. Not nearly as beautiful as my date. The group dynamic had shifted. Now I was the guy who had the good-looking girlfriend.

“Hey, Leon!” hollered Johnny. “Did you hear the one about the two nuns at the sausage factory?” Jessica rolled her eyes.

“Uh, Johnny, no crude jokes tonight, okay?” What would Amy think?

“Huh? Okay.”

I remembered how Johnny had told the story about the hooker at the leper colony in front of Melody and she’d laughed. I quickly crushed the memory.

My car started on the second try. Fortunately, it was making only the clunking and wheezing sounds that night, and not the ominous grinding noise. I sped off to Amy’s house.

It was the first time I’d been there in the daylight. Every house in the subdivision was less than five years old. The developers had bulldozed an old-growth forest and planted these buildings. Dan described these neighborhoods as “too new to have ghosts.”

Just before I could get out to ring the bell, Amy jogged out of her house. She shouted something to someone inside, then tried to pull open the car door. I had to lean over and open it from the inside.

As Amy sat down, her ponytail swung over and smacked me right in the face. I probably could have died happy right then. She kissed me, half on the mouth, half on the cheek. While I was introducing Jessica, Johnny winked at me. He was impressed.

Conversation was kind of stilted on the way over. I wasn’t sure Johnny was capable of not discussing bodily functions; he just sat silently. And I still felt awkward around Amy. What did she like to talk about?

You never had trouble talking to Melody.

I tried to kill the annoying little thought, but it wouldn’t shut up. By the time I managed to block it, I was driving nearly seventy.

There were about twenty cars parked in front of the small house. The
thunk-thunk
of hip-hop music rattled the windows. Clearly, the host’s parents were out of town.

I parked, and hand in hand, Amy and I walked into the house. It was hard to keep the big cheesy grin off my face. People would notice when I walked into the party, and not because I had something caught in my teeth. And not because they were staring at my date’s scarred face. Now I just had to make sure I didn’t screw up and embarrass Amy.

You never worried about embarrassing Melody.

Festivities, it seemed, were in the basement. The second we went downstairs, we were assaulted by the stench of human bodies, smoke, and beer. The deafening music vibrated off every surface in the rec room.

There were about twenty or thirty people here, and I didn’t know a soul. Everyone was dancing, laughing, and having a great time. I went to touch Amy’s hand, but she had already bolted to meet some guy.

He was a huge black dude, well over six feet tall. “Jamal!” Amy shrieked as she hugged him. My fists clenched. Why was she so happy to see him?

Jamal apparently knew Johnny. They smacked hands. Johnny introduced Jessica. I waited for Amy to introduce me, but she didn’t. Eventually, Jamal left to greet other guests.

Melody never ignored you around other people.

Before I realized he had gone, Johnny returned with a six-pack. Amy and Jessica each took a beer. I wasn’t much of a drinker but wanted to fit in. Unfortunately, I couldn’t bring myself to drink when I’d be driving, so I stuck my unopened can behind a couch. Johnny, who was already chugging his, didn’t notice.

I glanced around the room. I recognized Dylan among the faces. There were several people I knew by sight but not name. Other than that, I was among strangers.

Amy said something to me, but I couldn’t hear her over the music. She gestured that she was going to go say hi to some friends, and faded off in the crowd. I turned to say something to Johnny but he was gone too.

I suddenly felt out of my depth. I didn’t drink; I didn’t smoke; I didn’t like rap; and I hardly knew anyone here. Amy had been right: it was unhealthy that I always hung out with the same four or five people. When they were gone, I felt really self-conscious, like if I tried talking to anyone, I’d look like a nerd.

Melody never left your side when you went out. You were the one who took care of her.

Amy was on the other side of the basement, laughing with some friends. Wondering if it would come off as obsessive, I made my way toward her. Someone grabbed me from behind.

I half expected Jamal, ready to throw me out of his party for being a loser. It was Dylan.

“Dude!” he howled, raising a frothy plastic cup. “Hell of a party! Wooo!”

“Yes. Woo.” I wanted to hate this guy. I wanted to remember how he’d beaten me up and insulted Melody. But all I could think of at the moment was that he was someone I knew, someone who would talk to me.

Dylan chugged most of his beer. “Dude, did I see you come in with Amy Green?”

I straightened with pride. “She’s my date.”

“You freakin’ rock, Leon!” This apparently called for another drink. He grabbed a can out of a cooler. “But, um, weren’t you dating, um…”

“No!”

Dylan popped the top of his beer, then shoved it at me. “You rock, Leon! You goddamn rock! Woo!” He disappeared, howling, into the crowd.

I hoped he’d end up with a football scholarship or something. The man would fit in well at college.

Rather than turn down drinks all night, I decided to carry around my beer. I’d been at the party for only ten minutes and I’d sweated through my shirt. Every time I tried to stand somewhere, someone would bang into me. It was too uncomfortable to hang out, too loud for conversation. Johnny had vanished with Jessica. I searched for Amy.

The crowd, I noticed, was moving away from the center of the room. Several couples were dancing to the vicious beat. Some moved quite well; others were too confident or too blitzed to care. The crowd shouted. Girls shrieked. Guys howled.

I realized that Amy was one of the dancers, partnered up with Jamal. He was a good dancer. Amy, not so much, but she followed his lead. I felt a twinge of misplaced jealousy. They were just dancing, after all. All I had to do was wait for the song to end and cut in.

Yeah. All I had to do. Like that was going to happen. There was no way I was going to attempt to dance in front of all these people. I simply stood on the outskirts of the crowd, hoping Amy would remember me.

You never had to try to impress Melody.

The voice in my head was so insistent that it was hard not to verbally argue. I gnawed my lip to stop my mouth from moving. If I started talking to myself, I’d end up double-dating with Dan and his voices.

More and more people joined in the dancing. Amy changed partners. I kept telling myself that the next dance I’d grab her, but I always lost my nerve. Sweaty people smashed into me. The temperature of the basement began to approach sauna levels and I started to get real thirsty. The beer was tempting, but the mental image of a cop smelling even half a can of beer on my breath scared the piss out of me.

Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to get some fresh air. I toyed with the idea of asking Amy to come with me, but she was having too much fun. Screw it, if she wouldn’t make an effort to be with me…

I fought my way upstairs and found the bathroom. The heat had caused me to sweat away any chance of needing to use it, so I ran some water and washed my face. What the hell was wrong with me? Here I was, at a party with a beautiful girl, and I was having a lousy time.

I recalled something from just one week before, on the way to the dance. Something Melody had said.

My parents are going to be out of town next weekend, Leon.

That was right now. And to be at this party, I’d given up a chance to…

I was locked in a bathroom, pretending to pee. My date was getting passed around the dance floor; no one here wanted to talk to me; and I was bored out of my skull. And I was here by choice. Instead of taking off Melody’s clothes. Instead of seeing her whole body. Instead of becoming a man.

What the fuck had I been thinking? Just because Amy was a little prettier…well, a lot prettier. A whole lot. I thought of her in the halter top. The bikini picture in the yearbook. The way she kept kissing and touching me.

Just be patient. The time will come. You would have been using Melody, anyway.

Much as I didn’t want to, I had to go back downstairs. I wasn’t going to dance or drink, and conversation was impossible. I guessed I’d just sweat in a corner until Amy decided it was time to leave.

When I walked back through the living room, I saw that three guys from another school had turned on the video game system. Two of them forced electronic men to beat the hell out of each other while the third shouted advice.

“Hit B! No, B! Jesus, you suck!” They didn’t notice me.

“Hit B and C at the same time,” I suggested. On the screen, one muscleman beat the other’s face into the ground.

“Tight!” shouted the victor. The loser rolled his eyes and handed the controller to the spectator.

“I’ll pass. Let the new guy have a go.”

I hesitated. But what harm would one game be? I grabbed the controller and began to play. The two other guys hollered advice.

Three games later I was undefeated. “So how come you’re not down with everyone else?” asked my opponent, a little bitterly.

“I can’t stand rap,” I answered simply.

“All right, gimme a shot,” said one of the other guys. “What’s your name, anyway?”

“Leon.”

“I’m Mike. This is Brian and Brian.”

Mike and Brian No. 1 began battling, and Brian No. 2 and I shouted what they were doing wrong. Finally, I was having fun. Sitting there with three other guys, playing a game that I could have played any night, while my date danced with every other teenager in east Missouri. It never occurred to me to go back downstairs.

After saving the world from alien invasion, liberating Europe, and taking the Cincinnati Bengals to the Super Bowl, I knew I had to stop.

“Gotta fly, guys,” I said, happy that I had managed to do something fun that night. I tried not to think about Melody and how we would have done a lot more than play video games.

“Take care, Leon,” said Mike, without turning around. “Let’s get together sometime.”

I wandered back down the stairs. I noticed there were fewer people now. Apparently, some of the guests had passed through the living room without my even noticing. For a few minutes I couldn’t find Amy and thought she had left without me. I found her sitting on a couch, talking to two douche bags.

They were a couple of good-looking guys from another school. They reminded me of Dylan, only without the moronic charm. They sat on either side of Amy, hanging on her every word. Something told me they weren’t interested in her cheerleading stories.