Pledging to Die (An FBI/Romance Thriller Book 11) (16 page)

The scent, taste, and feel of the woman in his arms. It pleased him that she was kissing him back.

Oh God!

Johanna was kissing him!

Here was his other half, whether she believed it or not. When she didn't fight and stayed fluid in his arms, there was a sense of peace. Slowly breaking away, he stared down into her eyes. While his body begged him to take more, they had a cover to keep.

“I found you again, Joey. We need to talk.”

“Brody?” she murmured, unsure what the hell was going on. She couldn’t think, let along comprehend what was happening. Here was the man she’d been thinking about, and now he was there. The feel of his body against hers was better than anything they’d find in this crappy frat.

Could this even be real?

Was she dreaming?

Had someone drugged her and this was her fantasy?

“I’m your backup,” he said, keeping his voice low as he whispered in her ear. There was no doubt that they were being watched. If he looked, he risked them. This had to be believable. If they were alone, he’d kiss her more, trying to devour her from the inside out.

“Brody…I…”

“I missed you, Joey. God damn it, but I missed you. You’ve made a mess of all of this,” he stated, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. “I’m here to fix this. I’m going to fix us and keep you safe.”

“We’re undercover,” she whispered as the party raged around them. “I’m supposed to get us into the basement.”

He stared into her eyes as his hand found her wrist. With nimble fingers, he hit the stem on her watch, shutting down her tracker. She’d be safe with him. The last thing he wanted was to have someone follow them. If her partner did, Brody wasn’t quite sure what would happen. He did know it wouldn’t be good.

“We’re going to go somewhere quiet to talk. Try and look like you want me and don’t let go of my hand,” he ordered. Turning, he glanced up at the men and grinned wickedly. They were passing Sutton cash since he’d gotten the girl to at least focus on him.

As they headed out, Arman shook his head and appeared to be impressed.

Frankly, Brody didn't care what the man thought.

This was his time.

And he was going to get back his girl.

Outside, Joey couldn’t believe it. When he led her to the parking lot, not saying a word, she was confused. “We can’t disappear, Brody,” she said in hushed tones. “I’m working. I have to get back in there and into that basement.”

He opened the car door for her, not doubting that they were still being watched. He could feel eyes on him, but he wasn’t sure if it was their team, or the men in the frat. Either way, he wasn’t taking any chances.

As he rounded the car, he waited until he got inside before speaking. “Elizabeth gave me the okay to pull you from the party. We have to talk. Before we both work this case, we have some things that need to be settled.”

She stared at him incredulously. “Brody…”

He tugged her toward him again, this time with more anger. He’d been in hell without her, and she looked perfectly fine.

It pissed him off.

With each insistence that they had to work, he wanted to do the exact opposite more and more.

This time, when their lips met, Johanna paid the price. It was brutal. Gone was the gentleness that he’d always shown her. Instead, he pillaged, stole, and raided like a conquering hero. All the anger ebbed from him right into her. There was no doubt that this kiss was fueled by something more than lust.

It was rage.

When he released her mouth, her eyes were wide, but she said nothing.

What was there to say?

This was a side of Broderick Seaton that she’d never seen before. Normally, he was easy going and laid back.

Now…he was anything but that.

“I said, we’re going to talk. This case can wait until we clear up some of the issues between us.”

She didn't expect him to be there.

Never in her wildest dreams did she expect Brody to walk into that party and kiss her. He wasn’t supposed to be there. He was supposed to be far away from her…and safe.

Yet, here he was, and from the look of his clenched jaw, he wasn’t happy.

As he pulled out of the parking lot, tires squealing, he reached up and into his ear to pull out his com. “Take it out, Joey,” he ordered, dropping his own piece into the cup holder between them. The second it was out, he knew the team wouldn’t be privy to their conversations.

What he had to say needed privacy.

He deserved it.

After the last few weeks, he had earned this night, and more importantly, he’d earned the truth—from the woman he loved.

Johanna didn't hesitate.

She pulled the flesh colored device from her ear. “What the hell, Brody?” she said, staring at him.

“You look ridiculous in that outfit,” he said, still angry. Brody didn't like her flaunting her body all over the frat house—a body that was meant to be his.

Johanna was better than this, case or not. She was classy, and not some cheap dick bait.

She was hurt by his words. “I know it’s not believable, but I tried,” she stated, trying to keep the emotion from her voice.

He glanced over, realizing that he was hurting her. Even though he was pissed, he didn't want to break the woman beside him. If he did, he’d never get her back.

“Let me rephrase that. I’d take you home and screw you until we couldn’t walk, but that’s not the Johanna I love. This isn’t you, and we both know that. You’re far sexier in a suit and starched shirt than that joke of a skirt.” God knew he’d been picturing her in that for weeks. He loved slowly unbuttoning her shirt after a day at the office. Finding something so feminine beneath made his brain fuzzy. That’s the woman he wanted.

She’s the one he’d always want. 

Her heart skipped.

“Brody, we should be working!”

“Like I said, I cleared this with the bosses. We have to talk first. The frat men aren’t planning on going downstairs tonight. They’re backing off for a night or two. They’re freaked out by the missing women, and that’s bought us some leeway to regroup.”

She stared at him.

“We have bigger issues to worry about first. You’re a player in this game, Joey. They had your photo on file. You were going to be initiated into this sick clusterfuck, so I’m here to do it. Then I’ll know you’re safe.”

She stared at him. “Oh, so I’m just the job.”

Brody glanced over at her. “You’re more than that, Joey, but we’re stuck in the middle of this mess, so it can’t be ignored.”

Johanna licked her lips.

Brody forced himself to think about work. It wasn’t easy. So, instead of thinking about sex, he told her everything, much like he used to. From the beginning of his information coming into the case, up to what he’d learned earlier that day.

They clicked right back into what they once were—
partners.
It was seamless.

“They have to have something to do with it,” she stated. “I’ve been trying to get downstairs. I can’t get past the big oaf at the door. The only way he’ll let me down there is if it’s for sex.”

“Yeah, you’re talking about Nels Lucas. He’s Arman’s muscle. We’re going to get in there, but we have to do this right. The minute I take you down there, they’re going to expect sex, and I’m not letting that happen. No one’s touching you but me. Are we clear on that, Joey?” he asked, staring at her.

She didn't speak, but there was a flush running up her body. She couldn’t believe he was here. Johanna was at a loss. What she wanted to do was tell him how sorry she was for hurting him. She could see the pain on his face, and hear it in his words.

“Am I clear?”

“Yes, you are, Brody.”

She knew it was going to take time to heal these wounds. There was no way it could be fixed in one night. That wasn’t realistic.

Finally, he found a quiet pull off far enough from the party. “If we’re being followed, the tinted windows will give us some privacy,” he stated.

She watched him throw it angrily into park.

“Now, where to begin? Oh, I know… what the bloody hell, Joey! You close a damn door in my face, shove me out of your life, and then think it’s over? Did I mean nothing to you? Did the nights we spent making love mean nothing?” he asked.

Even in the dark, Johnna could see the irritation in his blue eyes.

“Brody, you don’t understand. I don’t want to hurt you. That’s the reason…”

He cut her off.

“Before you give me some lame ass excuse, you should know that I know everything that you told the Blackhawks. Everything you said to get away from me, I’m aware of now. This is a level playing field, Joey. You don’t have the leverage or advantage over me now. So, let’s start all over.”

She gasped again. “They told you? That’s not fair! I told Director Blackhawk that it was private. He shouldn’t have told you anything.”

Brody covered for his boss. “They didn't tell me shit, Joey. I stole your personnel file and read it. How else was I supposed to figure out what the hell was wrong with you? With us? You were acting so irrational, and I had to find out why. We’re Feds for Christ’s sake. Of course I’m going to wonder. Of course I’m going to dig into it.”

Yeah, like a crazed, stalker madman.

She stared at him openmouthed. “You what?”

“You heard me. What wouldn’t I do for you? I love you, Joey. I loved you the day you shoved me out of your life, and I’ve loved you the last two months while you ran like a chicken. Why can’t you see that nothing in your past, or our future, is going to make me fall out of love with you? You’re the one. I wasn’t kidding when I said those words. I don’t go handing them out like sticks of gum to any woman I meet.”

Her eyes filled with tears.

“What hurts more than anything is that we used to be close. Once, you shared everything. Now I find out that you’ve kept things hidden from me. You should have told me, Joey. You should have just trusted me enough to tell me the damn truth. I’ve always had your back, and I would have still kept you safe.”

She could hear his anger, pain, and irritation, and she didn't really blame him. If the situation had been reversed, she’d feel the same. Johanna had been a chicken, but in true Brody fashion, he was forcing her to face it down—whether she liked it or not.

“How do I bring that up in a conversation, Brody? You can’t be with me, because I’m damaged? Exactly how do I go there? What sane person says that?”

“You just do it. We slept together, Joey. It wasn’t just one or two bed hops to get it out of our system. You and I stayed in each other’s homes. We woke up together and shared meals. At night, we curled up on the couch to watch the damn news! That’s intimate. It’s not some sleazy one night lay for either of us, and you know it!”

Her heart was pounding in her chest. She’d never seen him this pissed off. It was…scary.

And turning her on.

“Brody, the first time we slept together, I warned you that it was a one night thing. You’re the idiot who fell in love with me. I didn't try to make that happen. I didn't want that to happen.”

Her words stung.

Never once did he consider she wouldn’t care about him like he did her. In his fairytale, she was the one who he rescued and made his.

He had to trust his gut. It was telling him to make his claim now. If he waited, she’d slip through his fingers again.

She was simply scared.

He heard it in her voice. While she might be trying to play it off, she was hurting too. Brody touched her chin with his fingers.

“Do you really think I’m an idiot, Joey? Is that how you see the things we shared?”

She blinked.

“Tell me.”

“No, you’re not an idiot.” She was the fool. After all, she’s the one that threw them away. He didn't run.

She did.

“Do you care about me at all, Joey? Is there anything in there?” he asked, touching her chest just above her heart. “When you think about me, did the distance even hurt?”

She couldn’t speak.

“Please be honest with me. If there’s nothing there, I need to know. I’ll take you back to the dorm and let you close the door in my face again. This time, I won’t come looking for you. Here’s your one chance. If you run, you can’t come back. I won’t get on and off this ride even for you. I have feelings. I have a heart. I bleed when I’m hurt, Joey. Now you have to decide if we find our way together because you trust me, or if we say goodbye. This is going to have to be your decision because you already know how I feel. I’ve never loved anyone but you. There’s my truth. Now, what’s yours?”

She wanted to weep.

God!

Yes, she missed him.

The last few weeks had been hell. Not only was she in love with him, but he was her best friend. He was the one she told everything to, with the exception of this one secret.

“Joey?” he pleaded. “Please trust me. I deserve the truth so I can move past this if you don’t care about me.”