Pledging to Die (An FBI/Romance Thriller Book 11) (24 page)

Instead, he was sinking, and fast.

At the sound of her boots, Callen knew they were going to be discussing it. What he really hoped was that they didn't make him feel like he was broken inside—more so than he already was.

His lack of control caused him even more shame.

When they sat, Ethan spoke first, “I’m sorry if I upset you. I was only teasing. I didn't think you’d get angry. Normally, we bust each other’s asses.”

Elizabeth sat beside Callen, staring him in the eyes. “I’m here if you want to talk about it. I won’t push, but I’d really it like if you’d let us in.”

He felt the knot unravel. They weren’t going to push the issue, but give him the choice. That one little concession helped ease the ache in his chest. “I’m sorry I bit you. I didn't mean to leave marks on you, Lyzee. I hate that I did. I hate that I’m this kind of man, and that I don’t have control.”

Callen remembered all the marks he’d sustained as a child, and a sickness welled up in him.

Instinctually, she ran her fingers over the scars on his arm. “I got bit by the love bug, nothing more, darlin’.”

He fought against the pain.

She touched his cheek. “In fact, I liked it. That was the hottest sex ever. Please don’t apologize for it. Your brother could take some lessons from you when it comes to being a sex fiend.”

Ethan grinned. “Bite the girl. Got it.”

Callen relaxed further, knowing what they were doing. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

She slid closer to him in the booth as the waitress dropped off their food. When she was gone, Elizabeth kissed him. It was soft and gentle.

“There’s nothing wrong with you, Cal. You’re reading too much into it. Why can’t you just like wild sex? We’ve discussed this before. Maybe it’s just our thing.”

“But the cheap motel,” he stated. “I should have…you deserve better. You’re not some slutty piece of ass. You’re my wife.” Maybe this bothered him because he’d done this before with countless women that he didn't even love.

She cut him off. “You didn't do anything wrong. I loved it. While we were making love, did I seem to be having a bad time? When you were touching me, did I look appalled or turned off? Granted, the décor sucked, but if I was checking that out, wouldn’t that be a sign that the sex sucked too? I don’t even know what color the rug was.”

“Shag,” Callen said, trying to tease, only he wasn’t feeling it.

“You’re a far harder judge on you than we are. You keep thinking that we’re measuring you up, but we’re not. You fit in just fine. We all have our issues, Callen. You’re just super focused on yours.”

Since Ethan set him off, it was time for him to offer the first thread of healing.

“I was ashamed of my body for the longest time,” Ethan said, admitting something he never said out loud to his brother. “Whenever I saw myself naked with this raven on my chest, I wanted to weep. It made me feel cheap, less of a man, and like my life was fraught with mistakes. I was so ashamed when people saw it. I always thought they were judging me.”

Callen listened to him.

“Then I had to see myself all scarred up. That made it a million times worse. Something I hated, and then learned to love again was back to being disgusting to me. We don’t think anything is wrong with you, bro. You’re perfect for us. We love you.”

He understood. “Thank you, Ethan,” Callen offered, so glad he had them in his life.

Elizabeth knew it was her turn.

“I’m afraid to get old,” she said, holding Callen’s hand. “I didn't work out like a maniac to pass my testing, I did it because I have two sexy men in my life, and I’m afraid one day I’ll turn into a frump, and you’ll both leave me.”

That surprised Callen. “Lyzee.”

Ethan was equally appalled. “Baby…”

“It’s the truth. Men get more distinguished with age. When you two turned forty, the women still circled the boat. When I turned forty, my ass dropped three inches and I got stretch marks. See? We all have issues, Callen. You like wild rough sex. So? Even if it’s because of what happened to you, it’s still part of the man I choose to be with. I don’t look at Ethan’s raven and think any less of it because of a scar. I know you’ve never noticed a blemish on my body when we’re together. Why can’t this be your thing? I love everything about you, including your impulsiveness.”

“And I love that too,” Ethan added. “I never would have thought to get a motel room. I would have over thought it, and then beat it to death in my brain. You didn't do anything wrong but feel. I envy you for being able to have a spur of the moment idea, and then going with it.”

She held his fingers twined with hers.

“Maybe that’s your avenue of letting it out. You let that hate and anger build, but maybe wild sex helps you cope. If you shut it off, maybe you’ll get worse. Just be you.”

He thought about it. “I’m still sorry about the roach coach. I meant what I said. You deserve better.”

“Ethan once went down on me in a dirty old stairwell in a hotel because he couldn’t wait to get to our room. He’s got questionable taste too.”

“Hey!” he said, flushing red. “You swore that was our secret,” he stated. “Elizabeth! Jesus!” He looked around hoping no one heard her be so crass.

She laughed. “Shit. My bad. Forget I said that, Cal. I promised Ethan I wouldn’t tell anyone. Woo hooo. It’s all better now, Cowboy. No one’s any the wiser.”

Callen laughed. “Your secret is safe with me.”

Elizabeth grinned. “Can we eat now? I’m starving. I didn't get breakfast, and I got jumped by a sexy Native. I need to refuel.”

Blackhawk grinned at his brother. “Wow, we are actually going to talk about work,” he stated, as the waitress came by to refill their drinks.

“Well, I’d rather talk about how Callen totally ravaged me and made my toes curl from the truly excellent orgasms, but we should focus.”

The waitress nearly dropped the pitcher of tea.

Ethan glared at Elizabeth, knowing he couldn’t cover her mouth from across the table. “Shhhhh.”

“It was all because of his really big…”

Callen jumped in, slapping his hand over her mouth. “I swear to God you’re a menace.”

Blackhawk laughed. “Yeah, but you have to love every sick second of it.”

And he did.

When he released her mouth, she smiled sweetly at him. “You both seem to forget that I’m an equal opportunity offender.”

Yeah, they were well aware.

“Anyway, how was your appointment with the president of the university?” she asked.

Ethan bit into his burger. “He’s concerned that the media is going to get a hint. For an hour, he tried to tell me how to do my job, including keeping you on a very short leash. Apparently, you irritated the shit out of him when you figured out he was blackmailing Gabe.”

“Gee. I’m batting a thousand today,” she admitted. “I’m just pissing people off left and right.”

They both stopped eating.

“What?” they said together.

“He’s the least of our problems,” Elizabeth stated, eating her salad. “I noticed our tech team didn't send out any emails proclaiming a big lead.”

“Nope,” Ethan stated. “They’re still processing the trace. I’ll assume by your previous comment, that the class was enlightening.”

She laughed.

“What happened?” Ethan asked, eating a fry.

“It started out really good. I was a little freaked out, but I managed to pull it all together.” She told him about Arman challenging her in front of everyone.

Blackhawk didn't look thrilled.

“Could he be the killer?”

Ethan thought about it. “Yeah, he could be. He’s got a big enough ego to make it a possibility.”

Callen shook his head. “Could we actually know who the killer is before we even get into the case?” he asked. “Has that ever happened before?”

Blackhawk wasn’t sure. “He might be our guy. This could be as straight forward as it seems.”

“If it is, that’s going to suck,” Elizabeth said.

“Why?” Callen asked. “That should make it easier. We know who the bad guy is. That’s awesome.”

He couldn’t be more wrong.

“It’s worse because now we have to prove it. He’ll know we’re gunning for him, and that’ll give him the advantage.”

Callen shook his head. “Great.”

“Plus, he’s innocent until proven guilty, and I’m betting his family will send in the high priced lawyers faster than we can even dig up the evidence.”

“Which is more than likely going to draw attention and end up screwing Gabe in the end.”

“So, this sucks all around,” Callen stated, putting down his burger.

“Yep. I like normal cases so much more,” Elizabeth stated, drinking some tea to wash down her salad.

When Callen switched their plates, she lifted a brow. “What are you doing?”

“You’ll never be a frump, so I’ll share my burger with you. You’ll always be the hottest wife on the planet, so stop making yourself suffer.”

She was touched. “You always were my favorite.”

“Hey! I’m sitting right here,” Ethan objected. “You might break my heart by saying things like that.”

She winked at him.

“When you’re finished stroking his ego, you can feel free to stroke mine. I think I’m due.”

She waited until he picked up his drink. “It won’t be your ego I’m stroking later, Cowboy.”

Ethan Blackhawk started choking when everyone looked over. “Elizabeth!”

She loved when they were all together.

This was heaven.

       
         
* * *
  B l a c k h a w k - W h i t e f o x   * * *

He watched her on campus, but he couldn’t spend much time gawking. He had to be careful.

Being stealthy mattered.

More than anything, he needed to make sure that if he was seen, it wasn’t staring at the next victim. That would only make his life a living hell.

While she walked around with her flock of floozies, he knew that she was meant to be his next choice.

Tonight, he’d make his move to make her all his.

He’d take what he needed.

Already, his body was getting heated picturing all the fun he could have with her.

First, he’d kill her.

Then, he’d use her.

Finally, he’d take what he wanted most.

When they found her, if they thought to look for her where he dumped her, they’d still not have a clue.

He was desperate to do it.

Not because he couldn’t get sex elsewhere, but because he needed to make everyone happy. The pressure was on, and that meant taking care of business.

Tonight, she’d offer up the best gift in the world.

This girl would live on forever, immortalized in his memory.

They could judge him a sinner or a saint.

It didn't matter.

In the end, he knew why he did it.

There was no doubt in his mind that he was doing what was for the best.

Sometimes, you had to sacrifice some minor players in order to benefit the whole, and that’s just what he was doing. They wouldn’t stop him, because he was smart.

Skilled.

Genius.

When they found out why he was doing it, no one would blame him.

No one.

How could they?

He was doing it for them.

Chapter Eight

She loved harassing her tech team. Next to being with the men she loved, this was probably her all-time favorite pastime at work. The second she walked into the lab, they saluted, and she got that warm fuzzy feeling.

“I love you all too, but if someone doesn’t give me something, I’m going to be chewing ass from here to FBI West. Now, spill it.”

Chris Leonard grinned at her, obviously the only one in the room who didn't buy into her act.

She gave him the look when he opened his mouth.

“Someone’s cranky this morning, boss lady, and I’m about to make it worse. I haven’t found anything new,” he stated, “but I know for a fact that Merry has.”

She faced down her head tech. “What do you have?”

“I found traces of Italian wool on each of them. On their clothes, there were little tiny fibers.”

Elizabeth waited for it. “And?”

“And there’s nothing substantial other than that. I found wool.”

“Well, I doubt that Italian speaking sheep crossed the ocean and killed these women, so I think I may need a little more. What else do you have?”

Merry looked helplessly at Chris Leonard, hoping he’d save her ass. Everything else she had was only in the beginning stages, and she wasn’t ready to share it quite yet. It was well known that he and Elizabeth went way back, and he and Doctor Magnus had a way of soothing the savage beast.

“Elizabeth,” he began. “The team is giving you all we can. The killer took them after a party, and they’re covered in trace. We’re working to isolate something, and as soon as we do, you’ll have it. Until then…scram.”

The techs actually gasped.

Ethan waited for it.

Chris was dangerously close to crossing that personal and professional line. “Oh, okay, Christopher. If you think I should lay off the team I will. I’ll just wait until the killer takes another victim, and then I’ll apologize to her family because the reason she’s dead is my team is still processing the trace.”

He pointed at the door. The techs and baby faced local ME scrambled like roaches when the lights went on. As soon as the last one was out, he took a deep breath. “I get you’re under the gun. I know you’re stressed, but so are we. You can’t get blood from a stone.”

“So, I’ve got stones working for me, now?”

He approached, using his cane. As they stood toe to toe, Callen and Ethan braced for it.

“Elizabeth, I love you, but there are days that you’re a pain in my ass.”

She patted his cheek. “Likewise, my friend. I’m heading back to the apartment to work on the whiteboard. I need more than wool from Merry. If I push, there’s a reason. What she’s holding back could be enough to set me down another path. I know you don’t like to speculate, but that’s kind of what we do.”

He headed toward the door to call in the head tech. “Give her all you have, even if you’re not one hundred percent on it. She understands the risks, and the benefits outweigh everything.”

“It’s the same person,” she said, reading the papers in her hands. “We found the same wool, and we found what we believe to be dandruff on the final victim.”

Elizabeth hopped up on the table. “Now, this is what I wanted. Have you tested it yet?”

She moved her neck cracking it. “I want you to think about how small a flake of dandruff is, and then I want you to picture me testing it. I have one little piece. I can’t screw it up. So, you’re going to have to be patient with me on this. Once I have the DNA, I’ll let you know.”

Callen hopped up next to Elizabeth. “It could be nothing. If Lori Denny was at the party, then it could be from anyone.”

Merry shook her head. “It wasn’t on her clothes. I found it in the palm of her hand. I think she grabbed his hair when he was attacking her. If it was from rubbing against partiers, it would have been on her attire.”

That was good enough for her. “Thank you, Merry. Good work. See? Your speculation gives me an avenue to pursue.”

With that, Elizabeth headed toward the room with her agents. She’d pushed the techs as hard as she could, and now it was time to give them some space.

She couldn’t help but be edgy. Right at that moment, they were dangling one of their own in front of a potential killer. That move was incredibly risky, and they knew it.

That had her on edge whether they liked it or not.

Inside the room, Agent Flowers stood up, nearly knocking over her chair. “Ma’am!”

“Sit. This isn’t the freaking military. You don’t have to get up when I walk in. I’d prefer you keep working.”

Ethan was amused. His wife just had that essence about her. The techs and agents were basically scared stupid whenever she was around.

It was fun to watch.

“What are you working on?” she asked, pointing menacingly at them.

Agent Blaise spoke up, “Director Blackhawk gave us the frat house to research. If you’re here for an update, we’re only about one third of the way through.”

“I want it by tomorrow. We’re going to sit down, have a pow wow, and discuss the five frat boys running this mess.”

Agent Flowers immediately got back to work. “Yes, ma’am.”

Elizabeth focused on the other employee in the room. Ethan had clued her in to their previous conversation, and she wasn’t happy. No, that was putting it mildly.

She didn't like him.

At all.

“It’s been brought to my attention that you’re not happy with Agent Seaton stepping in on this case.”

“No, I’m not, Director. I know that my partner and I could handle this just fine.”

She stared at him. “This is a team. There is no ‘I’ in that. We’re doing this as a group, and if you’re here to be a hero, let me tell you that won’t fly in our division. We have to work together for the good of the assignment, not our egos.”

“I hear you, ma’am,” he replied, but his face said it all. He wasn’t happy.

Yeah, she didn't think this egomaniac could be broken of his bad habits. That was on Gabe.

He’d created this mess.

“I’ll check in tomorrow,” she stated, heading toward the door. Outside, she stopped to glance over at her husband. “Can you call Gabe and inform him that I’ve changed my mind? When this is over, I will be sending Agent Blaise back to Quantico. I don’t want him on our team. He’s cutthroat and that gives me a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach.”

He pulled out his phone and dialed.

“Gladly.”

As it turned out, Elizabeth wasn’t the only one who was wary.

Trouble was coming.

       
         
* * *
  B l a c k h a w k - W h i t e f o x   * * *

Thursday Late Afternoon

Back at the apartment, they helped Callen get settled in before they plopped down on the couch to work. While they didn't have a lot to go on, that didn't mean they could check out for the day.

The team had to keep digging. Getting a chunk of Ethan’s profile out of the way would be a big help.

“I don’t have a hell of a lot,” he offered, seeing her pull out the smelly markers. “I’ll see what I can give you.”

She stared at the board. “I’m going to try this a different way,” she offered. “We’re going to assume it’s that frat punk, and see if he fits the possible profile.”

Ethan could do that for her.

“He challenged me in front of the whole class today, Ethan. It was like he wanted to rattle me, only I turned the tables on him.”

Elizabeth replayed the entire conversation to her men. When she was done, Callen didn't look happy.

“If he’s playing to you as his ultimate audience, isn't that dangerous, Ethan?”

Blackhawk thought about it. “No. She’s actually the safest woman on this campus if it’s him.”

Callen didn't get it.

“If she’s his target audience, he’s not going to touch her. He’s going to want to make sure that she sees him for what he’s worth—a genius—who can bury this investigation. She’d be his competition.”

That helped Callen relax a little.

“He’s not stupid,” Elizabeth offered. “I know there’s no way that he’s thinking
‘oh, we have dead girls and an FBI special speaker. How nice.’
That’s not his style,” she stated.

Blackhawk agreed. “You’re one hundred percent correct. If he’s taunting us, then he knows why we’re here. That puts our agents in even more danger.”

“That brings me to the part where I nearly broke Merry today. If we were all safe, I wouldn’t be so balls to the wall, but we have Johanna and Broderick undercover with no guns, no way to defend themselves, and we don’t know what’s happening. I have to be a bitch to our team, so I can be a shield for the bait.”

They sympathized with her. This was the shitty part about being the boss. You had to risk your people, and then carry it on your shoulders if something happened.

“So, our killer is smart,” Callen stated. “Here, I was thinking with this nutjob, he had to be insane.”

Ethan shook his head. “Serial killers can be incredibly intelligent. Look at Ted Bundy and Jeffery Dahmer. They had high IQ’s and managed to take down a lot of victims before the cops caught them.”

Elizabeth scribbled on the board. “Yeah, but they didn't taunt the cops. They kept on killing, letting the police find them. Could this kid be that insane that he’s going to flaunt what he’s doing?”

Ethan grabbed three beers from the fridge and passed them out. “Think about it. If he’s wearing the sign that says look at me, that makes him seem like the least obvious suspect. What killer is going to point it out?”

“So he’s psyching us out?” Callen asked, sipping his beer. “Shit, this is giving me a headache. When I had to take these psychology classes in college, I sucked.”

Blackhawk grinned. “I got A’s in them.”

Callen stared at him. “Wow! There’s a first for everything, I guess…”

Elizabeth started laughing. “Don’t you two start now!”

Blackhawk grinned at his brother, enjoying the joking around. It appeared that Callen was feeling a little better.

“Okay, so tell me a little about our primary suspect? In your eyes, what kind of killer is he going to be, Ethan? Let’s see if Arman Smithfield fits.”

“He’d be arrogant.”

“Check.”

“He’d dislike women, since he’s mutilating their bodies. In his mind, they’re less than equal. They’d be a means to an end. The only reason they’d be on his radar is because they offer him something he needs.”

Elizabeth pondered it. “I get the sex, but why the hell is he slashing them up?”

Ethan didn't have an answer for that quite yet. “Once our agents dig into their lives, we’ll have a better picture of that.”

That made her uneasy.

“What’s wrong?” Whitefox asked.

“I don’t like the idea that we’re going to let this entire case fall on the shoulders of two agents doing research. We’ve been there and done that before.”

Yeah, and it almost cost her one of her team.

“I’ll start on it,” Callen offered.

Ethan wouldn’t let her worry. “I’ll help. We have some time tonight. We can work on the five men Brody has flagged. That will give us something to work with tomorrow when we hit the ground running.”

“Thank you for understanding,” she said, pulling out her tablet. Three directors trumped a pair of agents any day in her book.

They got down to the grunt work.

Callen stayed busy for a little while. When it was driving him crazy, he had to say something. “If he’s so arrogant, and this is nothing but a game, how come he’s letting four other men screw her? If he wanted to kill her, why wouldn’t he just do it himself?”

Blackhawk had the answer to that.

“I can give you an easy answer, Callen. He likes people to watch. This is a game to him, and he’s trying to reach a goal. That’s what makes him dangerous,” he added.

“This is creepy,” Callen stated. “We have a psycho with a hate on for women, and now he’s taking organs. I’m almost afraid to find out what he’s doing with them. I really hope someone’s not rebuilding another person. We’ve done the Frankenstein thing once already, and that nearly got me killed.”

Elizabeth wanted to throw up just thinking about it. Had she been a few seconds late, Callen wouldn’t have been by her side.

“Yeah, I’m freaked too,” she admitted.

Ethan kept his concerns to himself. Why stress them out? Something didn't feel right, and he couldn’t put his finger on it. What kept driving him insane was the missing girl’s body. He couldn’t figure out where that third victim was, and why the killer didn't leave her with the others.

Was it significant?

An oversight?