Polar Opposites (In Aeternum Book 4) (32 page)

“In other news today, the government has made a statement about foiling another attack by this terrorist group called The Watchers. Today would have been a huge disaster for there were sixteen buses from local schools taking children to the Jimmy Carter Library and Museum. We are getting reports that the dogs found the explosives mere moments before detonation. Thankfully no one was hurt or injured. Security will be stepped up, tomorrow is a fundraiser there and they are taking no chances.”

Bailey clicked off the sound and tossed the remote down. For a while this group had been quiet but lately they seemed to be angling for a headline at least once a month. Supposedly the person she’d retrieved from Egypt would help in bringing down the rest of this group. Not her concern.

Eradicating them fell into the hands of people like Valentino Cassano and those he worked with. She stepped outside and stared along the deck. Beyond that, the white sands gleamed in the sun and the blue waters sparkled.

This wasn’t one of her typical places to come. Not that she had a type, given that until Ivan, she’d never even taken a vacation. She loved the ocean and so when this place had come up, she’d jumped at the chance to visit. She’d gone in silent, under no name. She’d bribed a fisherman to bring her here and set her up, which he’d done under his name. He’d brought her a shit load of food so she would be fine in that regard as well. Before he’d left her here, he’d said he’d be back in a week to check on her. Otherwise, if she needed him, to use the radio he’d placed in one of the bags.

She had no intention of calling him. This was
away
. She loved her homes but they were in metropolises and for someone who preferred her solitude, this was more her speed. Her cell phone had been left in her safe deposit box. They couldn’t track her and they couldn’t reach her.

Selfish?

Ask me if I give a damn.

Her dreams had been more frequent as of late and she needed to get them under control. She was edgy and angry. Still oh so angry.

She left the deck and smiled as her feet sank into the warm sand. “Why is my pain less important than anyone else’s? Why wouldn’t he have come clean sooner?”

Questions she’d asked McNeal and still plagued herself with. As if she could find the answer she wanted, she craved. She
needed
to bring herself peace within her soul.

“At least enough I stop looking like a raccoon and can go back and do my job successfully. Right now I’m a damn liability to myself and the organization.”

She walked out into the water until her fingertips trailed in the surf then she stopped. Her sarong was wet, plastered to her legs. Bailey sighed and began again, heading farther out. Eventually she began to swim and went out about a mile before turning back to shore. Limbs tired when she made it back, she walked a few steps and sank onto the sand, flopping over on her back with a grunt.

The water rose up to occasionally touch her heels but that was it. Once she’d gotten her breathing back under control, she sat up and brushed her hair away from her face. She brought her knees close and wrapped her arms around her legs, resting her chin on them.

Where does all my anger come from? Did I have it as a child? Was my childhood so bad I’ve blocked out more than just that day?

She didn’t think so. She remembered growing up in Paris with other children. Playing, getting into trouble and having fun. She had been here a few days now and still wasn’t any closer to having her questions answered. It wasn’t easy, admitting this was a problem for her. She couldn’t deal with it like she could when she was sent to dispatch other ‘problems’ in her work. She couldn’t use a poison or sight the target and pull a trigger, sending a bullet with deadly accuracy to solve it.

This was much harder than that. She had to open up and stop fighting memories that, for some reason or another, she’d blocked out all these years but that had chosen now to reappear.

She climbed to her feet. “All I know is I have to get this shit sorted out or I don’t go back to work. I can’t believe I threatened McNeal.”

Never would she have remotely considered doing such a thing, but whatever was going on with her had obviously pushed her into new territory. At least here, she was not a danger to anyone. A private island.

She walked back to her villa. At the outdoor shower, she rinsed the ocean water and sand from her body. Then she untied her sarong and draped it on a hook to dry. It didn’t take her long to go inside and throw on some running clothes.

After she was ready, Bailey set off. One way or another, she was going to exhaust herself enough to experience a full night of sleep without nightmares. She pushed hard all day long and after a simple fare for an evening meal that consisted of fresh fruit and some cheese, she walked to the master suite and climbed into the king-sized bed. A gentle breeze blew through the sheer curtains, cooling her heated body. Bailey stretched out and closed her eyes, praying sleep would come swiftly for her this night.

* * * *

“Are you sure you want to stay another week?”

Bailey nodded. “It’s doing me some good. Thanks for bringing my groceries.”

“You need a doctor?” He gestured at her. “You look maybe like you are sick.”

“Having some nightmares but it’s okay. I’m getting through it.”

“So no doctor?”

Unless he was tall and Russian with the name Ivan, she didn’t need him. “No, I’m good.” She was touched by his concerned look. “I am, truly.”

“You remind me of my daughter. I worry. You need me, you call.”

She helped him cast off and waved as he pulled away from the dock she stood on. He’d come early because there were some stormy conditions forecast for the next few days. He wanted to take her back with him but she refused. Pivoting on her heels, she strode back to the house and set about putting away her food.

When that was finished, she double-checked the generator in preparation for the storm. Everything looked to be in good order and she retired to the hammock and rested.

“So, are you done with your pity party?”

“You’d better be a figment of my imagination, McNeal,” she bit off without opening her eyes. “I don’t want to deal with you or your shit right now.”

“So that’s a no.”

She cracked open her eyes and groaned.
Is he fucking kidding me?
Braced against the railing stood McNeal. His white pirate shirt showed off his defined torso while the black pants highlighted the power in his legs. She shook her head and turned away, allowing her eyes to close.

“Is it that I didn’t tell you I found you with your parents’ blood on your face, you staring at it on your hands, what’s bothering you, Hyde? Or is it that you still feel responsible because you disobeyed them and came back when they told you to run?” His words were harsh and his tone callous.

She shot up in the hammock and jumped from it. “Don’t you fucking dare!” she seethed. “You don’t get to stand there and judge…” She crossed her arms and glared at him. “How do you know this? How the fuck do you know what she told me? McNeal, damn you, for once in your life, tell the
truth
.” Her fury was such she vibrated with it.

His expression was sad but she brushed away any and all emotion toward him. He wouldn’t let her be. Wouldn’t let her try to figure it out on her own. So now he could tell her, to hell with how it affected him on a personal level. Caring had left this vessel a long time ago.

“We all have secrets, Bailey.”

“Not you, not now. And especially not about this. Tell me or you will rue the day you ever first taught me to kill.”

“More threats.”

“No threat. That’s a promise, McNeal.” She stepped close and shoved her finger in his chest. “Unlike those you send me after, however, you have advance warning. I will come for you if you don’t tell me everything. You’ll not see it coming, either. You taught me too well.”

“You’d kill me.”

“I suggest you look at my face. Do you see the circles? The stress? The
fury
? Do not think to push me on this McNeal. I am a hair’s breadth away from losing my shit. Completely. As in free-falling from unimaginable heights without a parachute. Tell me what you
fucking know
!” Her voice crescendoed in a high soprano.

Off in the distance, across the waters, lightning split the sky as the tempest rolled closer. If it didn’t weaken before it arrived, it would be one hell of a storm. She didn’t mind, she felt the same way.

Chapter Twenty-Six

Silence stretched between them. His gaze held hers, unwavering. Bailey didn’t care, she wasn’t about to let this go. Not this time. The storm moved closer, bringing with it an increase in the wind and the scent of rain.

“You can’t outwait me, McNeal. I don’t give a damn if the storm rolls over us. I want my answers.”

“You want to know how I heard that. I was listening in.”

“Why?”

The man finally looked uncomfortable and shifted his weight before settling. “We’d set up a sting. It didn’t go as planned.”

She canted her head slightly to the side and swallowed, searching for the words. “You mean to tell me that entire day was an op for you and your men? That my parents and myself were being used as bait?”

“Why are you acting so surprised? We do it all the time.”

Her smile was bared teeth. “Of course you do. I remember moving a lot. Never staying in one place too long. They were on the run, weren’t they? Running from you and the fuckers who pulled the triggers.”

McNeal nodded. “We got wind of where they would be, they as in your parents. That you would be celebrating a birthday in that field. News of that got out to the faction.”

It was like a dagger to her heart. “So, you leaked it.” No way she’d let him get away with saying ‘news of it got out’. Her world became tinged in red and she tried to rein her emotions back under control. “So you heard. Where were you? Why didn’t you save them?” Bailey was proud her voice didn’t waver. It took a considerable amount for her not to clutch her hands into fists. She wanted so much to strike the man before her. Pummel him until he felt even a fraction of the pain and rage she had surging through her, rising like the surf beyond the shore as the storm grew in intensity.

“Our mistake was wanting them alive. But that had been the order, so we hung back. No one thought they would kill your parents. We were too late.
I
was too late.”

Another brief glimpse of the man behind the mask. Not that it mattered. She didn’t give a damn whether he hurt.

“So you heard my parents get murdered. Or you were close enough to see it.” She flexed her fingers. “Which was it?”

“I saw it.”

“I’m sure they were glad to have a friend like you in their corner. Set them up and watch them die.”

“It wasn’t like that, Bailey.”

“Of course not. Why didn’t you let him kill me?”

“He wouldn’t have killed you, Bailey. At least not right away. It was the least I could do to honor their memory—take you and make sure you not only lived and survived, but thrived.”

“You used my anger.”

“I did.”

“And now that you’ve created what stands before you, you are willing to send a team to kill me if I go crazy and just kill on a whim.” She stepped back, needing some space so she didn’t hit him. Yes, he deserved it but she wasn’t sure she could stop if she began. “How did you find me?”

“Your bag.”

“And here I thought I was being so clever.”

McNeal just stared at her. The first drops of rain began to fall and she thought about heading inside.

“Who was she to you?”

“Who was who?”

“My mother?”

Pain sliced through his gaze before it was blinked away like water evaporating on a hot sidewalk. “I loved her.”

“You loved her. Like, were in love with her?”

“Yes. Since the moment I laid eyes on her, she owned my heart. Didn’t matter I could have given her everything. She wanted Thomas and that was also from day one. He was always the one for her.”

“How angry did it make you to know your own brother had what you so desperately coveted?”

“Not nearly enough to do what you’re beginning to try and discover. I didn’t allow him to die because she took him over me.”

“Why is that so hard for me to think? You did it then felt guilty so you saved the child.”

“Nope. We wanted that faction, Bailey. I admit it was a mistake how things went down. He was supposed to be taken alive and the three of you were supposed to not even know they or us were there.”

“How’d that work out for you?”

“Shitty.”

Her hair plastered to her head as the rain fell in sheets and the wind whipped around them.

Bailey squinted through the weather at him, longing to say something else, but she whirled around and walked to the villa. She felt him at her back although he didn’t speak a word. She walked in and stood in the entryway, dripping on the tiles. The door shut and seconds later, McNeal positioned himself beside her.

“There’s a bathroom down that way you can use.” She pointed then walked in the opposite direction to the master suite.

Bailey slowly stripped off her sodden attire as she stood in the large bath. She stepped into the large glass shower and shut the door behind her. Adjusting the water temperature, she allowed the warm water to help relax the muscles that had been so tense since the moment McNeal had shown up. Had he not been here, she probably would have enjoyed a long shower. As it was, she kept it brief and stepped back out.

The large towel easily absorbed the water from her skin, leaving her dry. She dressed quickly and padded in bare feet out to the main part of the house. McNeal was there, wearing only his pants as he made coffee.

“You are a lot like your father, Bailey. You have Thomas’ drive and dedication to get the job done. Meticulous and particular about how things ought to be accomplished.”

She grabbed two cups and set them on the countertop. “How long have you known me?”

“I was near when you were born.”

She stopped looking for spoons and faced him. “What does that mean exactly, you were near?”